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Botched: A D&D Podcast

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A group of drunken misfits equipped with loose morals and a questionable understanding of the rules slog their way through fifth edition D&D

A group of drunken misfits equipped with loose morals and a questionable understanding of the rules slog their way through fifth edition D&D
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A group of drunken misfits equipped with loose morals and a questionable understanding of the rules slog their way through fifth edition D&D






Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP44 No Time For Curling

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The group, in searching for the friendly vampires have stumbled into a series of traps. Well, Sir Fennec especially has seemed to have fallen into a rather nasty one. I wonder what happens when you hit a hard surface falling from 200 feet? The group will soon find out! After they deal with that messy situation, they are going to have to deal with a few other trials and tribulations before finding their vampire buddies. Did Sir Fennec manage to make it out...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP43 The Crack Is A Lie

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Just when you thought there couldn’t be more shopping, Botched Podcast gives you…even more shopping! However, Old Prospector alerted the group that they are working for a bunch of blood cultist vampires. They have now arrived back at the island only to find none of the inhabitants in the town. In this episode, the group will search the town to figure out where the supposed vampires might have gone. They come across a hidden series of tunnels underneath...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP42 Ratmancing The Stone

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! What a fabulous shopping spree the group has just finished with. Now they have a new ally in the Ratsketball, and he is full of rope. Adorned in their Khak suits, the group is now tasked with a quest by Christina Wisdomian. In order to get some special gear of their own, they must seek out towns across the sea and trade for some much-needed goods. The town of Resthaven needs leather, 11 herbs and spices, some livestock and some ore. What do they need...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP41 Papa’s Got A Brand New Khaksuit

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well this seems like quite a nice little village they’ve found themselves in. A little foggy sure, but everyone seems awfully friendly. They’re well mannered, kind and accommodating! The group is in luck as this town doesn’t have a form of money. They all just trade goods and services for what they want. There happen to be a number of little shops in this town. I wonder what completely normal items they will acquire over the course of their stay. What...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP40 Any Hole In A Storm

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Why can’t these guys just take their punishment like they deserve? Of course not, they not only have to break out, but have to make a mess doing so and cause as much pain as possible. Now that they are free there seems to be a bigger issue. A giant killer fish monster is attacking the boat. I’m sure the group will heroically help defend the ship against the monster and then gain a new crew of prisoners and guards to sail the seas looking for adventure!...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP39 Fightin Round The World

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Another story completed, another new chapter to start. The last chapter didn’t quite end how the guys wanted, but I guess that’s what happens when you roleplay as murder hobos! In this new session we join a familiar face and some new ones as they are prisoners of the Knights of the Phoenix. In the rain, they are transferred to a boat, where they will be taken to an undisclosed island hidden in the Schuylkill Sea. This hodge-podge of brigands, derelict...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP38 Blunders R Us

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! As Nobu charges the Kronenbergers, the time has come to meet the new gods. The group must now converse with the new gods and make sure that they enlist their help against the old gods. Due to the previous decisions of the group, sacrifices must be made in order to save the Kronenbergers. Knight Commander Nachio Del Grande is in route to give the group their just rewards. Will the group enlist the aid of the gods? Can they save the kronenbergers? What will...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP37 Kronenberger Run

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The people of Squalls End are not looking so good. In fact, the town itself is pretty fucked. After crashing their flying ride into the town, they hid in a granary to make a last stand. That didn’t go so well either as the kronenbergers started coming in the walls and through the roof. They found a tunnel and descended into its depths. Now they look for a way out as the kronenbergers scratch at the ceiling trying to get in. What else is down in these...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP36 Welcome To Kronenburger

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Now that the group has successfully kidnapped Clarice. They have decided to follow their orders however they feel like yet again. The ship floats above Squalls End, waiting. The group has no idea what they’re waiting for exactly. All they know is Clarice needs to be in town at Midnight when the New Gods arrive. I’m sure their plan of waiting until midnight and then parachuting down to the ground just in the nick of time will go perfectly. What could...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP35 Unjustifiable Homicide

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Of course, the group thought it would be a great idea to kidnap the princess to keep her safe instead of just keeping her safe where she was. To be fair the group was trying to protect her from a religious war. Oh wait. They started the religious war when they murdered a child with a rock. Not only that, but they threatened to murder the ones protecting the living god Clarice. I guess they are only following orders after all. Oh wait. They didn’t bother...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP34 For The Greater Good?

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Last I checked, the group was just supposed to scout out the situation and then report back for more orders. However, in normal Botched fashion, they decide to involve themselves directly in the situation. After making friends with Clarice, they leave the village together to have a night out to chat with the young possible living goddess. The group now appears surrounded by unknown entities. Who is approaching in the field? Will the group ever actually...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP33 The Smell Of Friendship

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The phoenix flare sure did come in handy! A new crew has now joined the mission. Before taking off, the ship needs to be repaired completely and the dragons need to be looted properly. There is one issue of the soul bong needing souls in order for them to get off the ground. Assuming the group figures out their way around that issue, all that’s left to do is making it to Squall’s End. What awaits them in Squalls End? Where did they find the souls to get...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP32 Too Late To Apologize

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! A crashed airship can’t keep this team down. Repairs already underway, the group now faces off against a group of hungry wyrmlings. They managed to kill a couple with the aid of Also Randy, Frank and the Captain. However, in doing so, they have agitated a very large momma dragon. The group continues to fend off the scaley beasts, while hoping that some help arrives. They did fire off a giant phoenix flare after all. Will the group manage to fend off these...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 Ep31 Ya Ever Been In A Storm?

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The group has certainly left their mark on the flying airship…by already “accidentally” killing a crewman. To be fair, it was probably a pretty terrible idea for the captain to let such stupid people try and pilot the first ever flying ship. Satchy repaid the Captain for his mistake in his own…strange way. Though, it doesn’t really change the minds of the rest of the crew. Poxxin, meanwhile, seems pretty enamored with what’s behind the mystery door. Now...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP30 Breaking In The Highmen

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! A new chapter, but the same old group of dickheads. After terrorizing some people at the Knights Of The Phoenix fortress, and just annoying some others, the group has been given a task. After getting their affairs in order, the group loads up their new mode of transport. A mix of science and magic, a new form of transportation has been born. This transportation will allow them to reach their destination in a week instead of months. They will not be alone...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP29 Call Of The Phoenix

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The third chapter begins in our five-part saga. With few familiar faces, our journey begins in the Phoenix Fortress. A castle built with Dwarvish and Gnomish ingenuity. Each adventurer comes seeking work for their own reasons and one by one they will coalesce into one completely obnoxious group. Join them as they discover this military encampment and see its daily comings and goings now that the Phoenix Flare has been lit. Who are these mysterious...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP28 No One Likes A Bully

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Finally, the group found the source of infestation of fey blight. I’m sure Mayor Danners would be happy to know that this group of strangers finally solved their problems. Hopefully he can find Earl’s farm to let him know. Meanwhile, the group now has to deal with a monstrous tentacle ooze monster. They were just given a prophecy that at least one of them will survive the ordeal to tell the tale. If that holds true. Which of them will survive? Will they run...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP27 The Running Of The Ghoulies

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well…not everyone made it out of the Old Road alive. But fret not! There’s a bunch of murderous ravenous dwarves trying to kill what’s left! Oh…that doesn’t really give a lot of comfort. Perhaps the last few guys will come up with some ingenious way to outsmart these monsters. These burnt out buildings are sure to last a long time against the horde of ravenous flesh-eating monsters just outside. How are they going to escape their current situation? Are...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP26 The Gas Of Maric

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The group is still traversing the Old Road, trying to get to the Dwarvish city of Kalernor. After splitting the party, half the group is now trying to outrun a giant purple worm…while the other half is twiddling their thumbs waiting to see how that turns out. The play-it-safers and anyone who may have survived the encounter with the worm, make their way to the exit of the Old Road and the entrance of the city. There they are greeted by their oldest and most...


Botched: A D&D Podcast S3 EP25 Why Am I Dripping With Goo?

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Clint is got a bigger boat! Hopefully he’ll live long enough to use it. NPC’s have a tendency to die when assisting the group…usually because the group kills them. Now done with the boating portion of their trip, the group continues to travel on foot. The only way forward has been barred by a rockslide. However, a pair of strange rips in the fabric of space time have opened up alongside them. If they can manage around this obstacle, I’m sure that there’s no...