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Episodes

72: Timecop (1994) Redux

3/21/2018
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Flawless motion picture depicting a flawless actor performing flawless time traveling while being a flawless cop. With that being said, prepare for an hour plus of Phoenix and Frank describing the film's flaws. Yes, film. It's a goddamn film. www.LIWstudios.com www.youtube.com/LoiteringInWonderland

Duration:01:19:02

70: Die Hard Anthology (1988-2013) Part 1

11/1/2017
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In this Way Off Topic Radio / LIW crossover episode, Frank and Phoenix discuss all 5 Die Hard movies while going severely off topic the entire show. This is part 1 of a 2 part episode. This one deals mostly with our experiences with the Die Hard franchise growing up, our favorite scenes in the original trilogy and what makes Die Hard special. www.liwstudios.com youtube.com/loiteringinwonderland

Duration:00:56:29

69: Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995)

10/11/2017
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Phoenix is joined by his LIW The Twilight Zone Review co-host Frank Linkz from Way Off Topic Radio to discuss the classic Steven Seagal movie Under Siege 2: Dark Territory. A movie that they love an unreasonable amount despite it's many, many flaws. Editing being the biggest flaw. Phoenix renamed this adventure classic, "Under Siege 2: Whispers And Explosions." They also discuss their failed attempt at making this a Shitty Movie Showdown! video episode on Skype while trying to watch the...

Duration:00:26:19

68: The Stuff (1985)

9/1/2017
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Imagine you're a 12 year old boy and your world is shattered when your abusive family is overtaken by killer yogurt. Or is it killer? It's not made entirely clear. Maybe it's shaving cream. Or milk. Either way, this The Stuff is stored in the refridgerated and frozen section of your local grocery store. Also, it's sold on a warm display at the same store. Why? Why not, that's why. This movie from 1985 that feels like 1974 is a horror classic. Or a comedy classic. Or whatever it is, it's...

Duration:00:55:00

66: Code Of Honor (2016)

2/1/2017
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Steven Seagal is turning into a South Park caricature of himself. In this direct to DVD movie, Steven plays a lazy sniper with minimal dialogue so that the actor himself doesn't have to do anything. Add in some fake blood and terrible acting and you've got yourself a Loitering In Wonderland movie. Also, to whoever made this movie: learn how to use green screen. It looks worse than the early American't episodes.

Duration:00:28:21

65: The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978)

1/1/2017
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Phoenix has seen The Star Wars Holiday Special 20 something times. All within the past week or so. The viewing for this movie was for Shitty Movie Showdown! episode IV and because of editing the show, he had to watch and re-watch the 'special' over 20 times. It makes him sick thinking about it. This podcast is an angry letter to whoever is responsible for The Star Wars Holiday Special.

Duration:00:31:43

64: Sinister Squad (2016)

9/15/2016
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The Asylum makes terrible movies in hopes that you'll rent the wrong movie instead of the Hollywood blockbuster with a similar name/poster. Fuck them hard. Phoenix did an internship there for a bit when he was in film school. We've reviewed their movies on this show before (Sharknado 2 & 3) but this one is quite terrible. What's the plot? Good fucking question. Phoenix still doesn't know and he watched the movie then discussed it for 35 minutes. He almost gave up 15 minutes into this but...

Duration:00:34:24

63: Edward Scissorhands (1990)

10/6/2015
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It's October so Phoenix watched and reviewed a Halloween-ish movie, Edward Scissorhands which he hadn't seen since about 1994 when The Crow took over his goth needs. He runs down the plot of the movie, doesn't understand why scissors are acceptable replacements for hands, doesn't understand how Edward got 15 foot blocks of ice into his attic when he lived alone and had scissors for hands, he didn't remember that Edward was a robot, doesn't get why Anthony Michael Hall had to do such a...

Duration:00:39:51

57: Puppet Master Vs. Demonic Toys (2004) (MIW9)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 57. (Originally aired 9.7.14) In this installment we barely talk bout the movie we watched. In fact, all we really mention about it is that Corey Feldman is 34 in the movie but is made up to be an old father despite being only about 7 years older than his daughter. He even talks with a fake old man voice. Terrible. Turns out Phoenix had already seen this movie very...

Duration:01:00:09

55: Puppet Master 7: Retro Puppet Master (1999) (MIW7)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 55. (Originally aired 8.24.14) In this installment, you know what? Fuck it. In the 7th movie they rewrote their own history more times than a drunk grandpa making up war stories. This one made absolutely no sense, from the opening in 1944 to a random event leading to a flashback to 1892 that involves first draft versions of the puppets we know and love, bad guys from...

Duration:00:57:10

52: Puppet Master 4: The Demon (1993) (MIW4)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 52. (Originally 8.3.14) In this installment we barely watched Puppet Master 4: The Demon. It was terrible. To be honest, most of this episode is just bullshitting about randomness instead of talking about the movie. We had to do this to avoid going insane.

Duration:01:14:29

51: Puppet Master III: Toulon's Revenge (1991) (MIW3)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 51. (Originally aired 6.7.14) In this installment we watched part 3 of the nonsensical series, Puppet Master. For the third movie in a row the writers of this series have re-written the history of their only overarching human character; Toulon. This movie is basically what would happen if Anne Frank's story involved more puppets and slightly less Nazi's. Fucking boring...

Duration:00:48:38

50: Puppet Master II: His Unholy Creation (1991) (MIW2)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 49. (Originally aired 4.25.14) In this installment we continue to the sequel to Puppetmaster. However; things turned dim as we quickly realized the production values and acting talent took a quick swan dive for the sequel. This movie was a baffling mess of murder, rambling and sexual confusion that left us hopeful for part 3. Mostly, we were confused why Darkman was the...

Duration:00:51:18

49: Puppetmaster (1989) (MIW1)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was Midnight In Wonderland video episode. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 49. (Originally aired 4.23.14) We watched Puppetmaster and now we can predict the future of puppetry. It's a dead art, turns out. On this cross-over show (Richard from Midnight With Robert Shaw and Phoenix from Loitering In Wonderland) we go through the Puppetmaster movies one at a time. This is part 1 of 11 before we move on to greener pastures. Meaning another terrible...

Duration:01:18:29

48: X-Men: Days Of Future Past (2014)

6/7/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was The Phoenix West Show video episode #4. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 48. (Originally aired 9.22.14) On this episode of The Phoenix West Show, I decided to watch a movie that was recent enough to hold your attention. I watched X-Men: Days Of Future Past. The most confusing title since Speed 2: Cruise Control and Major League: Back To The Minors. It's either one or the other, choose one. Is it the future or the past? We may never know....

Duration:00:26:10

47: The ABC's Of Death (2012)

6/6/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was The Phoenix West Show video episode #3. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 47. (Originally aired 3.12.14) (This is an audio only version of the video show, for video go to youtube.com/liwpodcast) On this episode of The Phoenix West Show, Phoenix breaks down the 2012 movie The ABC's Of Death letter by letter. Awful scene by awful scene. He also curses the name of Ti West because he's a terrible person. Stay tuned for more advances as far as the...

46: You're Next! (2011)

6/4/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was The Phoenix West Show video episode #2. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 47. (Originally aired 1.26.14) (This is an audio only version of the video, for video go to youtube.com/liwpodcast) This time I focus my hate on 2011's You're Next which was actually released in 2013. Which should tell you something. This was was very pointless and slow which made for a recipe for booze.

Duration:00:20:00

45: The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)

6/4/2015
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UPDATE - Originally this was The Phoenix West Show video episode #1. When that show merged with LIW it became LIW episode 45. (Originally aired 1.22.14) I'm going to put The Phoenix West show on here for your listening pleasure despite the fact that it is a video show. If you like what you hear go to youtube.com/liwpodcast for more. For episode 1 I watched The Hunger Games: Catchign It was a real treat. These will be shorter in the future. Hopefully. That's not a promise. (Spoiler alert:...

Duration:00:16:00

44: Jason X (2001)

10/31/2014
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It was our Halloween episode so we watched Jason X and now we are confused why cowboys exist in the year 2455. Is your horror movie franchise starting to slip in the rental department? Fuck it! Head to space! That's what Jason X does for some reason. It follows the footsteps of other horror movie franchises Leprechaun and Hellraiser. This movie felt like soft-core porn without the tits. Although there is male nipple play that we found very erotic. Erotic and completely necessary in the...

43: Timecop (1994)

10/15/2014
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We watched Timecop and now we have a craving for a guy doing the splits in short shorts. This movie is amazing. It managed to be a movie about JCVD kicking people in the face while not ONLY being a movie about JCVD kicking people in the face. It has an insane plot that they barely touch on. More time is spent explaining the fact that a man wants to become president. We recommend watching Timecop.

Duration:00:54:42

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