Susan from Scratch-logo

Susan from Scratch

Comedy Podcasts

Every day, millions of people write reviews for products and places online. Using Esther Szalinski’s famous method of transferrence, Malcolm and Maggie will steal those precious memories to instantiate a new, real person: Susan. New episodes every Wednesday.

Every day, millions of people write reviews for products and places online. Using Esther Szalinski’s famous method of transferrence, Malcolm and Maggie will steal those precious memories to instantiate a new, real person: Susan. New episodes every Wednesday.

Location:

United States

Description:

Every day, millions of people write reviews for products and places online. Using Esther Szalinski’s famous method of transferrence, Malcolm and Maggie will steal those precious memories to instantiate a new, real person: Susan. New episodes every Wednesday.

Language:

English


Episodes

88: Swurtle

6/26/2020
In this episode: Turtle swoling, the beefing of turtles, turtlejacking (not what it sounds like), and general muscularization of turtles and turtle adjacent reptiles (actually, now that we've reviewed it, it's just turtles). Also in this episode: A surprisingly dark moral conundrum

Duration:00:21:09

87: Mafia Opera

6/19/2020
In this episode: A great quantity of reminiscing about our childhoods and comparatively little effort into giving Susan a childhood of her own. Also in this episode: More pee talk than is necessary. Glitter Dog. Inelegant bragging about interesting childhood memories for which we can take little personal credit.

Duration:00:26:19

86: Teen Brow

6/11/2020
In this episode: More discussion of dude wines, somehow. Also in this episode: Infinite sweat. Brow and eyeliner.

Duration:00:19:31

Black Lives Matter

6/5/2020
Donate/Get Involved/Help: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/ Learn/Read/Grow: https://www.rachelcargle.com/social-syllabus https://bookshop.org/books/between-the-world-and-me/9780812993547 https://bookshop.org/books/so-you-want-to-talk-about-race/9781580058827

Duration:00:02:38

Quarantini 6

5/29/2020
Relax your bones, dear listeners, it's Quarantini time. Prepare yourself a distracting concoction and let those aforementioned bones tumble down into an artful heap in that lovely bunker with us.

Duration:00:07:09

85: Activated Cells 3

5/20/2020
In this episode: Susan takes a heartbreaking journey from the pure freedom she found in her time as a blue man and learns to transition back into the mundanity of everyday life.

Duration:00:21:12

84: Activated Cells 2

5/6/2020
In this episode: Susan becomes one with the deep movings of the great city clock. The blue-man-ness also continues. Also in this episode: Dude wines

Duration:00:25:15

Quarantini 5

5/1/2020
Be at peace, friends, it's Quarantini time. Slosh some apropos liquors into a harmonious admixture and let yourself fall gracefully downwards into that trusty bunker with us.

Duration:00:09:13

83: Activated Cells

4/29/2020
In this episode: Susan undergoes a remarkable transformation and roves out into the city in search of others of her kind. Also in this episode: Martini olives. Extensive discussions of martini olives.

Duration:00:24:49

Quarantini 4

4/17/2020
Take a breath, it's Quarantini time. Shuffle a few well chosen fluids into a novel yet pleasing mixture and let yourself fall into that welcoming bunker with us.

Duration:00:13:57

82: Area Pig 3

4/15/2020
In this episode: We get down to business. Pig business that is. And by business, we mean what to do with the business a pig leaves behind. That's right, this episode is all about the business you get out of the business end of a pig. Also in this episode: A rooftop garden.

Duration:00:26:53

Quarantini 3

4/10/2020
Relax, it's Quarantini time. Drip a bit of some tasty liquid into a vacant highball glass and slide down into that old happy bunker with us.

Duration:00:14:19

81: Area Pig 2

4/9/2020
In this episode: At last - a hearty discussion about cheese. Cheese of various kinds. Cheese from various sources. Cheese in all its glorious manifestations. Also in this episode: a pig, a costume, and a surprise celebrity cameo.

Duration:00:27:45

Quarantini 2

4/3/2020
Fear not, our second Quarantini episode is here. Pour yourself a snifty of something delish, and traipse on down into that dusty bunker with us.

Duration:00:13:53

80: Area Pig

4/1/2020
In this episode: We take Susan back to her roots. And by roots - we mean that time she lived with a pig. Why did she live with the pig? What happens next? Listen and find out... (That's the point of the podcast. Were you expecting a complete summary in the show notes?)

Duration:00:23:14

Quarantini 1

3/27/2020
Welcome to the inaugural episode of Quarantini - our response to the world's problems. Mix yourself up a nice something to drink, slip into something comfortable and head down into the bunker.

Duration:00:12:06

79: The Southern Contingent 4

3/26/2020
Okay - so things are a little weird right now. And we're not just talking about Susan. In this episode: we confront the strangeness of the world, and decide that a little self care is warranted. Also, we get ourselves out of the now four week long pickle we've been in through a timely (haha) review.

Duration:00:27:02

78: The Southern Contingent 3

3/26/2020
In this episode: We do give Susan a new memory? Or a part of a memory? Or some kind of fragment that might... oh god what have we done. How do we get out of this? Help!

Duration:00:26:08

77: The Southern Contingent 2

2/27/2020
In this episode: Honestly... not as much as we had hoped. But hey, what do you want? It's hard out there. Don't worry, we got the job done. Well, we didn't get the job done, but we did fill the time. And that's what matters, isn't it?

Duration:00:33:38

76: The Southern Contingent

2/19/2020
In this episode: We begin to outline a rough sketch of some kind of situation in the context of Susan's... home life? The details are still somewhat in flux, but there is certainly (possibly) a shepherd involved, as well as some cameos from a few old friends. Also in this episode: We semi-intentionally insult a large swath of American culture, accidentally ramble through the longest intro of all time, and discover that Malcolm has in fact seen "The Devil Wears Prada".

Duration:00:38:42