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The Doghouse Bastards

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DHB 228: Demon Growler

I don't mean to boast, but when you can throw together a couple of shoogly £5 chairs in a working butchers shop, convince people to get out of their onesies and come knock on the door at silly o'clock in the evening to win a prize, whilst also revealing intimate details about their sexy times, then you know that it was worth the nae sleep to get the show recorded. That's right, we recorded this slobberknocker live from the Tilly Butchers shop! Listen in as we cover everything from demonic...



This is not a regular show! Sadly we've had no time to get together and record, but you might like this as a bit of filler until we get together next week. Recently Scott and Lurch were invited onto SHMU FM by top breakfast host Sandy 'The Sandman' Gibson, were we broadcasted a late night, swear free show to the whole of Aberdeen and and Aberdeenshire. Sandy has been kind enough to send us a copy of the show for you all to enjoy. Hope you like it!



Well this is another example of what we call her in Scotland, 'A Stramash' / Scott nearly goes into a smashing frenzy due to a laptop / Steev nearly died, genuinely! / Lurch takes his dress up to a whole new level / Man grabs ass, gets hoofed in crackers / 'Get Tae Yer Bed!' - The best audio since One Eyed Willie / All this and more on tonight's DHB Radio Show!


DHB 226: June's Lum

Yeah it's been a while, but we're back with a goddamned vengeance with this show! Joining the managerial team of Sasquatch and Lurch is new guest Sandy The Other Manny The Sandman From Shmu FM the Manny! LOTS of great stories in this one / Sandy has to pass the new SPC check for all new guests / Scott tries to prank Lurch, ends up getting made to look like an incontinent fool at the supermarket / AGM incoming, we're getting ready / We petition the Sandman to let us on to FM radio /...


DHB 225: I'm Gonna Kill That Baron B*****d!

Technology can suck balls, like big massive swinging balls sometimes. Take for instance this recording, where both recording devices failed me, and I had to rip the audio from the video file instead. You shouldn't notice any difference, it's still myself and Lurch shouting into microphones to compensate for our miserable existences. But wait! There's two other voices in the mix too! That's right, we're joined by a returning 'Tesseract/Tessington World of Adventure' and newbie Matty...


DHB 224: The Church of Lurch

It's always about one - upmanship, isn't it? You get something nice, and someone close to you has to crap all over it and do something better.. Well, there's that, and other things to discuss in tonight's episode, including Lurch's adventures in cinema visits, Scott having an unruly sort invade the beautiful homestead and an appeal for new guests! All this and a lot more on tonight's bad ass DHB Radio Show!


DHB 223: The EMP Toodle

You know, a listener said it best when they commented, "Watching Scott trying to handle Lurch and The Apprentice on the show together is like watching a dad struggling to keep his ADHD riddled kids from running chaos at Disneyland". And they're not far wrong.. In this latest episode of The DHB Radio Show, hear how Lurch has blown another wad of cash to one-up Scott, how The Apprentice has been matched with chocolate on Tinder and how absent show guests deal with a woman refusing to get...


DHB 222: Dungarees for Chickens

So here's the thing. This show is really only about 1hr 40mins long, and throughout Lurch was knocking back a £50 bottle of wine like it was fecking Ribena. So hang around after the outro music, as we kept recording to see how messed up he would get.. And he did. We cover everything from egg throwing junkies, drilling holes in walls and why you'd spank away a grand on a partially working arcade machine. Yeah, all plans for emails and stories went out the window with this one, Lurch was on...



Jeez, it's been like.. FOREVER since we last recorded a show! Luckily Scott, Lurch Monster and Steevasaurus haven't forgotten how it all works and got together to record this nonsense! Hear how Scott's head looks like the watermelon from Dirty Dancing, how Steev is being press ganged into appearing in LURCHAPALOOZA 2017 and why The Baron is seeing glittering snakes whilst watching 'Platoon' for the 42nd time over the space of two weeks. All this and a helluva lot more on this week's DHB...


DHB 220: Bane Cock

A new year and a new episode of your favourite podcast! Well, it might not be your 'favourite', but at least you'll play it in the car while you navigate your fat ass through the MacDonalds Drive-Thru.. Joining the captain of the awesome ship tonight is Baron Von Lurch Monster. He's been a low boy lately, so wer'e going to be launching 'Lurch Aid' soon - stay tuned.


DHB 219: Dreamy Sleepy Nighty Snoozey Snooze

Well this one is an absolute stramash of Old Skool goodness.. Did you know that we'll soon be six years old, and did you know that it's been over a year and a half since we've had a gathering this laden with former guests? Well, buckle in people to hear all about some shocking news from Maynard, some not-shocking news from the victorious Lurch Monster and some 'lock your cats and other stabby prone animals away from The Coops' news! Yep.. Oh, and we get gatecrashed by a random sandwich...


DHB 218: Self Defence Beard

Hey, listen.. This is just a short one, I know this. But I had to go and do things! Jeez, cut me a damned break people, it's not easy for us being podcasting superstars AND maintaining real lives! Do you want a leg? Because I'll cut a damned leg off to say sorry if that's what you really want, you monsters. You know what, I'm not sorry - screw you. I don't even mean that, daddy says bad things when he's upset. So basically this show is a little short. I had to cut off the recording...


DHB 217: It Wipes It's Face

Lurch Monster joins Scott tonight for an 'off the cuff' show, pretty much put together to let Lurch vent his fury at women kind in general. He's feeling a bit put out by the fairer sex folks, and he's not holding back when it comes to telling it how it is. Buckle in and prepare for rage face Von Lurch Monster! Scott.


DHB 216: Live Fae the Tilly Butcher!

Another show on the road this week, so apologies for the less than usual quality. Plus, I had to use the audio from the live video we broadcast on Facebook, as the recording deck crapped out through half the show. Still, it's come out pretty well. Join Sasquatch, Lurch Monster and The Apprentice in this weeks clusterfudge of a show!


DHB 215: House of Steev

First time on the road with the mobile deck, and second time live on Facebook! Still some teething problems, but worth checking out - Show is a good one, and includes LOTS of poop stuff.. Since you know, we're all five.


DHB 214: DaQueeree

In the words of the mighty LL Cool J, "Don't call it a comeback, I've been here for years". I mean yes, a lot of those years have been spent laying on a sofa with my hands down my tracksuit bottoms scratching myself, but I've cast my freshly itched gentleman's potatoes and we're ready to get podcasting again! Tonight Scott is joined by Lurch Monster for this looong show. Well worth checking out to the end, things get a bit serious and we see a side of Lurch that we normally never get a...


DHB 213: 'Murica, We Need To Have a Talk..

You know, you 'Muricans have gone batshit to the wall. Seriously, what the hell are you doing with yourselves? We're stepping in and taking control, you can't run yourselves.. Or we would, if we weren't busy hosting the BESTEST PODCAST EVER! That's right, Scott is joined tonight by The Snuffles, and we talk about everything from setting fire to gardens, to a man shot-putting a Macaroni supper into a river. All this and more on tonight's DHB!


DHB 212: Black Market Chromosomes

In the wise words of LL Cool J, "Don't call it a comeback, we've been here for years". Granted, mostly doing f*ck all and being ridiculous, but we've still been here sitting in our underwear contemplating our belly button fluff.So Scott is joined by Steevasaurus, and a ONCE AGAIN nearly dead Lurch! Do you remember when you were a kid that you had a pal who was always poorly? That kid who would rarely get invited out anywhere because he was tucked in bed watching Only Fools and Horses, and...


DHB 211: Oh So Lonely..

A new episode? Well, kinda. If you're a new listener you might wanna skip this one and go back a couple. It's just Scott flying solo for this one, updating you all on what's been happening during the DHB downtime, why all his clothes are stained and why a kid with ridiculous eyebrows is leading us all as a nation into naming our kids after instagram filters.What? I know, it all sounds ridiculous, but it'll all make sense when you listen in to the latest DHB Radio Show!- Scott.


DHB 210: Get Off Me, I'm Diabetic!

Scott is joined by The Baron Von Lurch Monster tonight, as we talk about him being power slammed by Paul Blart, how not to steal from supermarkets and why tons of people this week win the 'John Mackay Award for Best Worst Facebook Post of the Week'. Oh, and don't forget the Baron's new sex toy.. (Big thanks to listener Ian Avery for sponsoring tonight's show) (Also, if you want to email the Vegan - All this and more on tonight's show!


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