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Journey of Attachment: Unwillingness Is Your Issue

10/22/2019
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I hear people say they want to change all the time—whether it’s getting divorced, changing jobs, finding a partner or improving a parental relationship. They say they are willing to do what it takes, and even connect with their feelings, but the needle doesn’t move. Frustrated, they go into victim mode by getting defensive (but I’m doing everything I can!) or blaming others (my therapist is useless). The problem is, these people are only scratching the surface. To make significant changes,...

Duration:00:30:12

Are You In a Hurry To Label People So You Feel Better?

10/18/2019
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It’s easy to label someone as toxic, obnoxious, boring, etc. in order to dismiss them. Sometimes it even happens without knowing much about the person. Why do you do it? What is happening inside when you are quick to write someone off or decide they are no good? Perhaps you feel threatened in some way, like part of you believes they are better than you. Judging them can provide a sense of superiority or self-righteousness. But who’s to say you’re doing things right and they’re doing things...

Duration:00:29:38

Journey of Attachment: How 90 Seconds Can Change Your Life

10/15/2019
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How often do you find yourself in a situation where you just cannot take being there another minute longer? The appeal of running away, distracting and hiding when anxiety or discomfort surfaces is huge. Our society even teaches us how to dispose of things: cut bait, kick someone to the curb, cut your losses, etc. Those tactics may provide immediate relief, but it doesn’t help you grow. You may not even realize you do it, because you’ve been doing it for so long, it’s just what you do. Let’s...

Duration:00:30:00

Why Do I Wake Up In a Panic?

10/11/2019
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How do you usually wake up feeling? Are you excited about the day ahead, or do you worry about what could go wrong? Maybe you awake in a panic. You don’t know why, so you start racking your brain for what you may have forgotten. Or maybe you simply have an anxious feeling you can’t shake, so it ruins your day. However it manifests, it’s horrible and you want it to stop. Maybe you even try to drown out the negative feelings by focusing on positive affirmations, but that does nothing to quell...

Duration:00:17:34

Journey of Attachment: When Someone is Mad, It Doesn’t Mean It’s Your Fault

10/8/2019
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How often do you try to avoid someone being mad at you? Do you attempt to do things perfectly for fear of being blamed, then berate yourself when you fall short? Let’s say you usually do the ironing at home. One day your partner goes to grab a shirt before a big meeting. There are a few wrinkles—nothing major—but he/she is clearly upset. You feel horrible. Your partner doesn’t say it’s your fault, but they are clearly annoyed, so you feel this wash of shame and your “I’m not good enough”...

Duration:00:17:50

Why Do I Attract Untrustworthy People?

10/4/2019
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Do you believe you are a trustworthy person when it comes to love and relationships, yet have trouble trusting your partner (or potential partner)? Maybe you are afraid they will cheat so you use that as an excuse not to commit. When your behavior is in reaction to someone else (i.e. I’m not going to commit because I suspect he/she is cheating), there are definitely trust issues, but it’s actually not about the other person. It’s YOU that you don’t trust. When you don’t trust yourself, you...

Duration:00:31:34

Journey of Attachment: Being a Love Addict (or Avoidant?)

10/1/2019
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You’re picky about who you date, looking for Mr. or Ms. Perfect (i.e. someone who won’t hurt or disappoint you). Then you find someone who likes you. There is mutual chemistry, and yet, they seem hesitant. You know what it was like at the beginning (which could have been last week), but now it feels as though they are slip sliding away. Perhaps it triggers in you the feeling of neediness. You cling to them by people pleasing, while accepting breadcrumbs of attention in return. You do this...

Duration:00:38:24

How Your Lack of Commitment Shows Up Everywhere

9/27/2019
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If “what if’s” rule your world because you’re always afraid of making the wrong choice, you live your life with one foot in and one foot out. In other words, your lack of commitment keeps you stuck, convinced life is working against you. You will actually look for evidence to support your non-decision, then complain the Universe doesn’t have your back (but it doesn’t have your back because you haven’t put a stake in the ground). This plays out in all areas of life: dating but never...

Duration:00:24:22

Surviving to Thriving: Neeta Bhushan

9/25/2019
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In this episode of “Surviving to Thriving: Overcoming My Darkest Moment” I talk with Neeta Bhushan, an Emotional Health Educator and Executive Performance Coach to global leaders and CEOs as well as thousands of women from all walks of life. Listen in as she takes us through her journey through multiple losses and a toxic relationship to now where she has written two Amazon best-sellers Emotional GRIT and The Book of Coaching spoke at Women Economic Forum founded SchoolOfGrit.tv and had a...

Duration:00:38:29

Journey of Attachment: The Horror of Being Crazy

9/24/2019
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Have you ever met someone where the chemistry was incredible, but it led you to act like a complete lunatic? Maybe this person canceled dinner plans, triggering you to do things that made you cringe WHILE doing them. But you couldn’t stop it from happening. You barely recognize yourself because you’re usually pretty even-keeled. When triggered into this crazy mode, some people throw objects or scream in public or send a million text messages or stalk someone on social media or sleep with...

Duration:00:24:00

Want to be Happy? Stop Doing These Things

9/20/2019
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A lot of people think happiness is like an amusement park ride with intense highs that must be chased. But happiness is subtler than that, and what you THINK leads to happiness may actually result in the opposite. Many anti-happiness behaviors become patterns without you realizing it, and they can end up ruling your life. By recognizing and then stopping them, you actually challenge yourself to become who you truly are, which is critical to true, sustained happiness. In this podcast I...

Duration:00:27:21

Journey of Attachment: I Feel Sorry for Me; I’m With a Narcissist

9/17/2019
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Most people have narcissistic tendencies, it is part of what keeps human beings alive. Without it, no one would be here. The problem with slapping that label on your partner is that it may prevent you from seeing and acknowledging your own stuff. No one is in a position to judge others, and doing so is often a reflection of how you see yourself because other people are mirrors for your own behavior. If you want to solve the “narcissistic” issue and feel a sense of well-being, instead of...

Duration:00:29:44

Why Should I Share My Feelings When it Changes Nothing?

9/13/2019
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Do people ever do things that annoy you, but you keep it to yourself because you know they won’t change their behavior? Or have you broken up with someone out of anger and regretted it later? Maybe you want to express your regret, but figure your ex has probably moved on… so what’s the point? It all seems like a waste of effort. The thing is, sharing your feelings has nothing to do with changing the other person. It’s about changing you. Speaking your truth sends a message to yourself and...

Duration:00:21:39

Journey of Attachment: Deciding to Be Okay Staying in a Dysfunctional Relationship

9/10/2019
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You’re in a dysfunctional relationship that isn’t making you happy. Your partner doesn’t treat you the way you want, so you’re always complaining and thinking about leaving. But you fear being alone; maybe your lifestyle would drastically change if you were to split. You keep waiting for things to change, and maybe he/she even reacts to something differently than you expect, giving you hope the tide is turning. It doesn’t. Your friends and family encourage you to leave, saying you deserve...

Duration:00:23:07

I Know I’m Dysfunctional. So Now What?

9/6/2019
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Self-awareness is great—essential even—but what do you do with it? Maybe you notice your patterns and recognize when you go into victim mode, but you can’t stop. It’s like watching a movie you’ve seen 100 times. You know how things will end, even though you’re desperate to change it. And that can lead you down the rabbit hole of feeling bad about yourself; believing nothing will ever change. But what have you really done? Read some books? Listened to this podcast? Awareness doesn’t mean much...

Duration:00:25:08

Journey of Attachment: From Go-With-The-Flow to GET ME OUT!

9/3/2019
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Do you feel like you’re a go-with-the-flow person most of the time… until you hit a big roadblock? This often happens in situations where what you want is totally different from what your partner wants. You try to be flexible, but at some point you feel like everything is pushing against you, leaving you frustrated and angry. It turns out you actually do want your way, and you want it NOW! You want to have the picture in your head so you go from easy-breezy to totally losing it. Let’s...

Duration:00:22:42

A Sense of Entitlement

8/30/2019
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Many of us frown on the “entitled” without realizing we ourselves feel it, believing we are owed something in this life. It often stems from childhood. If you weren’t shown how to value yourself and fill your own emotional tank, you looked externally. You thought hard work would be rewarded, as if a fairy godmother was keeping score and would fill up the part of you that was missing. Unfortunately, this belief will keep you stuck in a cycle of anger and frustration, waiting for a reward that...

Duration:00:20:30

Surviving to Thriving: Lucia Giovannini

8/28/2019
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In this episode of “Surviving to Thriving: Overcoming My Darkest Moment” I talk with Lucia Giovannini, a former Italian supermodel turned best-selling author, spiritual teacher, transformational coach, environmental & animal activist, and author of 13 books. Listen in as she takes us through her journey of relationships and finding her higher purpose to now where she is a Master Fire-walking Trainer, an NLP and Neuro-Semantics Trainer, and a recognized international Life Coach. Learn more...

Duration:00:44:16

Journey of Attachment: The Attachment to Obstacles

8/27/2019
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Obstacles provide fantastic excuses for staying stuck: “He’ll leave his wife when his youngest graduates,” or “She will be ready to commit once she is financially secure.” By sacrificing yourself and putting what you want on hold, do you hope to eventually be rewarded with the relationship you want? Do you fantasize about him/her saying, “Screw it, the kids will get over it. Let’s do this!”? When you hide behind obstacles, you avoid dealing with your deeper fears of rejection, abandonment or...

Duration:00:30:27

Here a Belief, There a Belief… Everywhere a Belief!

8/23/2019
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Many people have issues around three key areas in life: love, money, and health. And if you’ve done some work on yourself, you realize much of what keeps you from having what you want comes from negative beliefs (I don’t deserve, I’m not good enough, etc.). You focus on breaking patterns and building your value to the point that you not only believe you CAN meet the love of your life, make the money you want or stick to a healthy lifestyle… it actually happens! Until the other shoe drops....

Duration:00:24:18