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To Love Honor and Vacuum

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Tired of Christian pat answers about marriage? The podcast that goes in-depth into marriage, parenting, and even sex--to see how we can live the passionate life we were meant for. Paired with To Love, Honor and Vacuum--the blog!

Tired of Christian pat answers about marriage? The podcast that goes in-depth into marriage, parenting, and even sex--to see how we can live the passionate life we were meant for. Paired with To Love, Honor and Vacuum--the blog!
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Tired of Christian pat answers about marriage? The podcast that goes in-depth into marriage, parenting, and even sex--to see how we can live the passionate life we were meant for. Paired with To Love, Honor and Vacuum--the blog!




Episode 19: Sex Ed for Adults

On the blog I have been talking about sex and theology, so I'd like to bring it all together and take a look at what we can learn from the way God made our bodies, marriage, and sex! For the podcast extras, check out the post on my blog here And of course don't forget to check out Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex and 9 Thoughts that Can Change Your Marriage!


Episode 18: Remebering Rachel Held Evans: Don't Let the Church Drive You Away From Jesus

In the wake of Rachel Held Evans' passing, Rebecca and I talk about her work and ideas about prioritizing authentic living-in-Christ over strict adherence to doctrine. While different doctrines can be a source of division for Christians, Jesus' universal love ties us all together. And all too often, kids fall away from church because doctrine was the centre rather than a relationship with Christ. Check out my blog, To Love Honor and Vacuum, for podcast extras and more great content!


Episode 17: Can We Stop with Gender Stereotypes Already?

Today, my daughter and I talk about gender differences and gender stereotypes. God created man and woman, but culture created masculine and feminine. We address how the ways that we look at masculinity and femininity are restrictive and work against inclusivity. And a strict adherence to gender stereotypes can also really damage our marriages. I also talk about whether it is selfish or frivolous to spend time and energy improving your sex life (I think you know my stance). For all this and...


Episode 16: Forgiveness, Healing, and Lust

I don't think we always talk about forgiveness in a way that is actually helpful. Today I talk about what it really means to heal and move past something. And while I talk about forgiveness, I also address some reader question and comments regarding men lusting after other women, and the harm behind the mentality that every man will have this struggle. Join us on the blog for even further discussion at To Love Honor and Vacuum! I would love to hear your thoughts.


Episode 15: Women and Porn, Creepy Men, and More

We talk plenty about men struggling with porn, but today I address the growing number of women who are struggling with it. Rebecca and I also talk about whether to get involved if your child is dating a non-Christian, and how you can make yourself less of a target for sexual harassment from creeps you don't know. All that on today's podcast and more! Also, don't forget to check out the blog if you want more, at!


Episode 14: Let's Talk Modesty!

Today I tackle the issue of modesty. We often warn women not to be stumbling blocks for men, and lay the blame for men's lust at their feet, but what if that is actually creating a stumbling block for our women? I also address whether you should fake orgasm every time, and Rebecca and I discuss wedding vows


Episode 13: Speak Up in Your Marriage

All too often, big problems later on in marriage arise as a result of bad habits and poor communication earlier on. Let's talk about how to fix our marriages before they are broken. Rebecca also joins me to talk about why so many Christian women are having trouble finding a husband, and I address dealing with a spouse's sexual history.


Episode 12: The Burden of the Household

Everyone is sick today, so we have a short episode of Rebecca and Connor talking about the psychological burden of being in charge of chores. They talk about their own journey through sorting out the division of tasks and responsibility, and give some advice on how you can find a healthier balance in your marriage too!


Episode 11: A New Take on Resolving Conflict

Today I talk about what I have learned and observed about resolving "conflicts in marriage" and present some insights on a more productive approach. I also talk about some tricks to help you and your spouse communicate love to one another, and Rebecca and I delve into cellphones and the millennial mental health crisis.


Episode 10: A New Definition of Sex

This week we're finishing up our series on how sex should be mutual--including working towards a new definition of sex. I also talk about what to do when a husband in a high-pressure job is too tired for sex, why you might want to reconsider cosleeping, and then Rebecca comes on to talk about what millennials are getting RIGHT! Check out the podcast extras here.


Epidode 9: Two Keys to a Successful Marriage

Today I talk about two small but vital things that can change your marriage from the ground up. Rebecca and I later discuss Dr. Ron Welch's book, 10 Choices Successful Couples Make, and I address some comments and questions from my readers about how society talks about sex, and why women often lose their libidos right before marriage. As always, if you want more you can check out the blog post for extras right here!


Episode 8: Who's being deprived

Today we take a look at the do not deprive verses; have we been using them all wrong? I also speak with my daughter about the risks of having a young youth pastor, as well as the critical differences between Christian counselling and biblical counselling. Check out the post here!


Episode 7: How Our Bodies Work, Sexual Health, and More!

Keeping with the theme of the month on my blog, we talk about sexual health, pelvic floor exams, testosterone levels, and flipping how sex is typically thought of in Christian communities. Speaking of community, my daughter and I talk about why community among millennials seems to be lacking, and what can be done about it. Check out the blog post here!


Episode 6: Valentine's Day! Being a Sexually Confident Woman

Today we talk about how to be a sexually confident woman, mutual sex, and more! My daughter joins me once again to talk about how modern marriage is being done differently in our Millennial Marriage Corner, and she addresses some reader comments about the psychological effects of porn. Check out the post here! Go to Covenant Eyes and use the code "TLHV," or use this link to get your first month free!


Episode 5: Hot and Holy Sex, Control Freaks, and More!

This week we are talking a lot about sex: How to let yourself be in the moment during sex, how to turn off the parts of your brain that distract you from enjoying sex, how to deepen intimacy with your partner, and how and when to try changing things up a bit. I also talk with my daughter about the student loan crisis and how college and university students can combat lifelong debt through their lifestyle! You can also check out the post that accompanies the podcast over at...


Episode 4: You Don't Get to Be Selfish

Today we talk about what it means when you say you regret having kids, why it's important to take our thoughts captive, how and when to rebuild trust after an affair, and more. My daughter and I also take about the issue of millennials falling away from church. Tune in to hear it all, or go check out the post on my site:


Episode 3: Creating Conditions for Success in Marriage

How can we create conditions for a thriving marriage? Can we actually find more joy by cutting out the time wasters in our life? Does "Love and Respect" actually point us toward Jesus? Today we will be talking about all this and more, including a guest appearance from my son-in-law and daughter to talk about how they handled video-games in their marriage. To read the post for this episode check out my site, To Love Honor and Vacuum!


Episode 2: Love and Respect

Today I take a really critical look at the Christian bestselling book "Love and Respect," giving you my opinion on some of the harmful messages it puts forward. Later, I talk about how divorce affects kids, what to do if your husband ogles other women, and I sit down with my daughter to discuss "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo." Check out the post for this episode here!


Episode 1: Health, Sex, and Wine Culture

Welcome to the new To Love Honor and Vacuum Podcast! Today we are talking about creating healthy habits, the problem with mommy "mommy wine culture," and more! You can listen on my blog at