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Ep 20: Do You Feel Seen?

Do you feel seen? Do you feel seen in your relationship? Do you feel that people around you see your value and your contribution? Do you feel seen for who you really are, and for how hard you try to do well and be a good person? Do you feel your partner sees you and appreciates everything you do to make him or her happy? For way too many people, the answer to those questions is No. Feeling seen is feeling (not just a visual). It's akin to feeling...


Ep 19: How Men Use Or Lose Power In Relationships, Part 2

This is Part 2/2 of How Men Use Or Lose Power In Relationship The men’s retreat I mention in the podcast can be found here (note: there’s an early-reg deal happening right now): https://loveworksforyou.com/mens-retreat-jan-2019 What a man’s partners can do to help him Offer general appreciations and affirmations of him being a good man So many men (and all people) were coded to believe they are a piece of shit. It still stings. It’s still active. Just at our last workshop, a man came up...


Ep 18: How Men Use Or Lose Power In Relationship Part 1

Here's the quick summary, but remember to listen to the podcast for the full content. “Men, you have the power to make or break a relationship … Research shows that what men do in a relationship is, by a large margin, the crucial factor that separates a great relationship from a failed one …. The data proves that a man’s actions are the key variable that determines whether a relationship succeeds or fails”. Said Dr. John Gottman, et al, in the book A Man’s Guide To Women. That’s worth...


Ep 17: How To Create More Intimacy

For this episode, we have a present for you: The material Sonika's talking about has been turned into an E-book which includes the 100 questions for intimacy-creating conversations that she mentions. Simply go download the ebook and you'll have it forever. It's free (and we do ask you for your email address to get the ebook). Download the ebook here: loveworksforyou.com/100-questions


Ep 16: The Perils Of Generalizing In Conflicts

When couples or family members experience conflict, it is easy to rush into generalities. "You never help me around the house! I always have to do everything myself!" “We never have sex anymore. I am tired of being in relationship with someone who doesn’t value intimacy and sex.” “You never take responsibility for your side of the street. You blame me for everything!” “I am sick of being the only one who initiates working on the relationship. I want to be with someone who actually wants...


Ep 15: Should We Split Up Or Stay Together?

Am I in the right relationship? Is my marriage worth fighting for? Are we ever going to be in love again? I love my partner, but I don’t feel that feeling anymore. I love my partner, but our sex is lacking. I love my partner but I’m not IN love. So … should I stay I should I go? Should we split up or stay together? This dilemma haunts a good many people, in long-term marriages as well as brand-new or budding relationships. It’s genuinely unsettling when you don’t feel secure about the...


Ep 14: How To Make A Woman Happy

9 tips and insight on how to make and keep a woman happy. But before I say another word, here’s a very big disclaimer … and I’m going to get this out of the way, so I don’t have to preface every statement with another disclaimer, and thus bore you to death! Whenever we talk about what women like or what men like, or how women or men think, and so on, we’re always generalizing. Which means, it’s not true for everyone. If you’re a woman listening, you might hear me say that women love this or...


Ep 13: How To Have High Transcendental Sex

When we make love with our partner, I believe we secretly long to have a shared soul-merging experience of eternity and bliss with our beloved. We seek nothing less than to lose ourselves completely in love and to be consumed wholeheartedly in pleasure, uniting the physical and spiritual, the human and the divine, in a grand climactic ecstasy of spiritual oneness. Unfortunately, for most of us, sex is a hurried rush of routine under blankets in the dark, devoid of a miraculous transcendent...


Ep 12: Dating, Amazon.com Style

“Online dating is a full-time job”. Said by a friend of mine, a good-looking, conscious, kind man with a great job and great income. An “eligible bachelor”, if I ever met one. This episode is about dating, with special emphasis on online dating. There are a lot of cool things about online dating, and likewise a lot of challenges and pitfalls which translates to frustration and heartache for singles looking to create relationships — perhaps you’ve been there? Some of the amazing benefits...


Ep 11: Ten Ways To Change A Negative Belief

“To succeed, we must first believe that we can”. Michael Korda The article with this podcast was originally published in a book Sonika co-authored, Seize Your Opportunities: How To Live Your Life Without Limits. There is no doubt that what we believe influences who we are, affects the choices we make and ultimately determines the results we produce. Beliefs shape what we see, what we experience and what we expect. More than anything else, they determine how we feel. If we want to increase...


Ep 10: Being Too Nice?

One of the biggest mistakes we witness people make in relationship is the decision, conscious or unconscious, to rein in some of their own desires or dreams because it triggers their partner, because they think it’ll cause too much of a stir, or because of they convince themselves they “should”. See if you can relate to any of these examples from people we’ve been coaching recently. Anna thinks there is something wrong with her because she doesn’t want to marry and have children with the...


Ep 9: Judgments

Judgments are an integral and inescapable part of being a human being, and certainly of being in relationship with other human beings. Even the most spiritual among us still judge each other to no end. When you feel judged by a partner, you often react strongly against it, fighting to prove it wrong. When you’re the one judging your partner, your kids, or anyone in your life, you might be reticent to admitting that you’re indeed passing judgment. Our judgments of others can be used...


Ep 8: Lisa Schrader - Awakening Shakti For Women

Lisa Schrader is the founder of Awakening Shakti. For more than twenty years, she has been supporting and teaching women about awakening their inner Shakti, the sacred feminine energy. She guides women to tap into their magnetic radiance to attract their desires more easily. In other words, how to feel more naturally turned-on and sensually alive. In our modern Western culture women as well as men live under the creed of work more, perform more, make more money, make more happen, a way of...


Ep 7: Is This The One? And Other Questions In Early Relationships

Exploring a new relationship with someone is both an exhilarating experience and a frightening one. Here you are, opening your heart, soul and body to someone with wild abandon and love but absolutely no commitment or guarantee of any future. There is immense possibility for creating the relationship of your dreams on the one hand, and great risk and uncertainty on the other. Somewhere, you know, without a commitment or promise, you could be abandoned or rejected and deeply hurt at any...


Ep 6: You Love Me -- Real Or Not Real? (Brief Episode)

A woman came into our office; we’ll call her Karen, very upset and jealous that her husband was “attracted to other women”. She had come across a picture of a woman he had liked on his Instagram account, which set off her jealousy. In fact, she got so mad at him, she accused him of being unfaithful and threatened to divorce him. A man I coached, let’s call him Timothy, was enraged with his girlfriend, because she was always talking about how great her car was. Every time they’d go driving,...


Ep 5: Stop Bickering Like Kids, And Start Communicating Like Adults

Bickering and arguing can suck the life out of any relationship. Most of us have at one point another found ourselves in the kind of bickering fests, or arguments, where we wonder what we’re even arguing about in the first place. If you haven’t been there yourself, you’ve probably witnessed the bickering couple at a family gathering, where aunt Jenny and uncle Bob are constantly correcting and retorting at each other. If bickering and arguing was merely annoying, it might not be such a big...


Ep 4: Foundation Part 3: How To Turn Your Relationship Around

“Everything and everyone wants to be loved.” When we feel unhappy, lonely, disconnected, despairing, hopeless, disappointed, angry, hurt or any other unfavorable feeling in relationship, our first attempt at repairing the relationship and restoring love is to talk about our problems. We focus on what isn’t working and on what we don’t like, we bring the issues in our relationship to the forefront – often in the form of complaint or blame or criticism to our partners – hoping they’ll...


Ep 3: Foundation Part 2: Fighting To Be Right About Stuff You Don't Want To Be Right About

This is Part 2 to the last podcast where I talked about our tendency to talk about our problems – or as we call it, Complaining For Change – when we want improvement in our relationships. The positive intent behind talking about problems is the desire to get back to being in love, back to being connected, back to being in harmony, back to feeling good about ourselves, empowered and in love as a couple. When I have a complaint, for example, that you don't listen to me. It’s as if I’m trying...


Ep 0: Intro To Dare To Love And Sonika & Christian (Brief Episode)

This is a quick intro episode to tell you a little bit about us, about our philosophy, and what you can expect from this podcast. On the Dare To Love podcast, we intend to share with you insights, techniques, and practical tools for improving and empowering all your relationships, from your close intimate relationships with your spouse or partner, kids and family, all the way to your social and professional relationships with coworkers, employees or bosses. Relationships are often an...


Ep 2: Foundation Part 1: Getting What You DON'T Want In Relationship

In the beginning of your relationship, when you're all enamoured and in love - AKA the Honeymoon Phase - your partner is the best. You love almost everything about him or her and you let them know in every way possible: You touch and kiss and make love, you spend tons of quality time together, you speak words of admiration and appreciation. In short, they're amazing, you're amazing, your relaitonship is amazing, and your future potential is ... well, amazing! At some point, your partner...