We have updated our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Learn More

No Man Knows My Herstory-logo

No Man Knows My Herstory

Religion & Spirituality Podcas >

Join two queer ex-Mormons as they unpack years of generational trauma and explore what it was like to be raised in a Christian cult.

Join two queer ex-Mormons as they unpack years of generational trauma and explore what it was like to be raised in a Christian cult.
More Information


United States


Join two queer ex-Mormons as they unpack years of generational trauma and explore what it was like to be raised in a Christian cult.




34 - A secular come-to-Jesus-meeting for white ex-Mormons about our privilege

This week, Cari and Kelsae, two white ladies, gather up other white ex-Mos for a discussion about white privilege and how it makes us into a**holes. White ex-Mormons, particularly those who create ex-Mo content, should be talking about white privilege, implicit bias, and racism. We need to hear more from marginalized groups. We need to believe them when they say they are hurt and we need to support them in the ways they want to be supported. We also all fail, and we should own it. In that...


33 - It's a two-fer! LDS church on the BSA and medical marijuana

This week, Cari and Kelsae give you two topics for the price of one. They discuss the announcement that, after 105 years, the LDS Church and the BSA will go their separate ways and the LDS Church’s concerns on Utah’s medical marijuana initiative. Cari may need to take a chill pill in parts of this but hey you knew what you were getting into. Please listen, Utah voters, and make sure your neighbors have access to the medicine they need. For full show notes and links, go to:...


32 - "Non-consenual immorality" and why Mormons don't understand consent

This week, Cari and Kelsae discuss Elder Quinton L. Cook’s recent General Conference address, Prepare to Meet God, wherein this so-called apostle of the Lord introduced the concept of “nonconsensual immorality” and conflated it with good old fashioned immorality. Body autonomy is the theme of the day as Cari and Kelsae rip that miserable special witness of Christ a new one. CONTENT WARNING: Cari shares a specific event of sexual assault from 30:50-31:50. For full show notes and links, go...


28 - Joseph Bishop and sexual abuse in Mormonism

Cari and Kelsae were not planning to do a Joseph Bishop episode, but do an episode they did. They start off with why they were initially quite resistant to talking about Bishop, then launch into their reactions to the events that led us through the scandal through late afternoon 3/30/18. They discuss the systems in place within the Mormon Church that create and protect sexual predators. CONTENT WARNING: sexual abuse, assault, rape, etc. discussed in detail through the episode regarding...


27 - Discovering our queer selves

Cari and Kelsae talk about how they discovered they were queer and all the pitfalls that come with being queer women in a religion that erases female sexuality. They talk about exploring queer identities and labels and not feeling queer enough. They finish off by discussing the privilege queer people in heterosexual relationships have and how to not be a jerk. Learn it and learn it well, or Cari will get preachy and read you for filth. For full show notes and links, go to:...


26 - Mormon Mad Libs

This week, Cari and Kelsae need a fetching break. It’s been a week, friends, complete with families and dealing with our wily brains in new and painful ways. We’ll be right back to our normal content next week. For this week, though, Cari and Kelsae play a little Mad Libs-type game with Mormon hymns and children’s songs. Pay close attention for a few answers that turn out better than expected. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/26


25 - What we wish our parents had done

This week, Cari and Kelsae discuss what they wish their parents had done for them when they were cute little queer kids. C&K are still cute (adorable!) and queer (women are so rad, you guys), but now they are traumatized atheists, and they have a bone to pick with Mormonism and its culture. Any rage expressed is directed at no one except their own pasts and TSCC. CONTENT WARNING: general discussion of suicidal ideation/attempt. For full show notes and links, go to:...


24 - Values for Mormon young women

As sisters in Zion, we had some values gingerly pounded into our brains. Turns out they messed us up, but the good news is that we don’t have to accept any values we don’t want to adopt. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/24


22 - Responding to listeners' questions

This week, Cari and Kelsae answer listener questions, since the crazy is too strong to be trusted with answering email and PMs. Plus, find out how to join Club F#ck Packer! Cari and Kelsae talk about existential crises, anger, and the frustrations of trying to communicate with TBMs about negative experiences with Mormonism. Sounds like fun, right? We’re just barrels of laughs. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/22


21 - LDS website on suicide prevention, part 2

Cari and Kelsae continue their discussion about the LDS church’s recently updated website on suicide prevention. This week, they focus on the messages being sent to people whose lives are personally touched by suicide. Unfortunately, the church does not exceed our expectations. The website is blame-y, vague, and contradictory. This is not the most or the best the Mormon church could do, especially on such an important topic. CONTENT WARNING: Discussion of suicide attempts and ideation,...


20 - LDS website on suicide prevention, part 1

This week, Cari and Kelsae talk about the recent updates targeted to local LDS leadership made to suicide.lds.org. Recently, Elder Rasband was added to a statewide committee meant to address the growing problem of suicide in Utah. Does the Mormon church give good resources, enough training, or good guidance to its local leadership? No, no it does not. And it’s dangerous. CONTENT WARNING: general discussion on suicide, some mentions of suicide attempt(s) without details. For full show notes...


18 - Josh and Lolly Weed announce their plan to divorce

Yesterday, Josh and Lolly Weed (a prominent Mormon couple in a mixed-orientation marriage) publicly announced their plan to divorce. Considering the massive impact that this couple’s marriage has had on LGBTQIA Mormons, Cari and Kelsae recorded an impromptu minisode (that isn’t actually mini at all) and process some feelings. In order to make this information more accessible to ex-Mormons and active Mormons alike, Cari and Kelsae depart from NMKMH’s typical tone and format and refrain from...


17 - Prophet's first press conference

On Tuesday, the LDS church held a press conference to introduce Russell M. Nelson as the new Mormon Prophet and President of the church. Cari and Kelsae discuss Dieter Uchtdorf’s demotion back to the Quorum of the 12, give their hot takes on how the new First Presidency did answering questions from the press, and yell for a bit about how Nelson is super sexist. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/17


16 - The power and control wheel

Cari and Kelsae discuss the power and control wheel, a tool that explains different ways in which abusive people gain power and control over others, in the context of Mormonism and how many of these same tactics are used by the LDS church to maintain power over members. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/16


15 - Why we left Mormonism

We made it to 2018, apostates! To kick off the new year, Cari and Kelsae respond to a listener’s question about their respective Mormon journeys and share the details of why and how they left. CONTENT WARNING: This episodes contains brief discussion of self-harm, including mentioning specific methods (no details are shared) from 21:00-22:00. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/15


14 - #GaslightTheWorld, the atonement

Cari and Kelsae’s super special December theme, #GaslightTheWorld, finally concludes with an episode about one of the most manipulative (and baffling) concepts in Christianity: the atonement. Also, Cari and Kelsae announce a new contest! How exciting! For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/14


13 - #GaslightTheWorld, service in Mormonism

Cari and Kelsae are on episode four of #GaslightTheWorld, woooo! This week’s focus is on service in the LDS church (*cough*CULT*cough), and in particular how Mormon women are trained to become co-dependent robots. Healthy! For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/13


12 - #GaslightTheWorld, sexual abuse in Mormonism

#GaslightTheWorld continues! Cari and Kelsae respond to a listener’s question about the effects of sexual abuse on attachment (listen to episode 9 for more information on attachment theory) and explore the gaslighting in how the LDS church treats survivors of sexual violence. CONTENT WARNING: General discussion of sexual violence throughout the episode. From 33:00-34:50 Cari shares a personal experience of sexual assault (with minimal detail). There is mention of rape and suicide attempt....


11 - #GaslightTheWorld, benevolent sexism in Mormonism

Welcome to week two of #GaslightTheWorld! This week, Cari and Kelsae explore the many and sundry ways in which benevolent sexism exists in Mormon doctrine and culture, and how LDS church leaders use gaslighting to perpetuate it. Gross. For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/11


10 - #GaslightTheWorld, LDS Face2Face

Happy December, apostates! Cari and Kelsae are excited to announce their super special theme for this month: #GaslightTheWorld! This week, they explore aaaaaaall the gaslighting from the recent LDS Face2Face event hosted by Elders Oaks and Ballard. (Spoiler: there's lots.) For full show notes and links, go to: www.nomanknowsmyherstory.com/episodes/10


Try Premium for 30 days

Live games for all NFL, MLB, NBA, & NHL teams
Commercial-Free Music
No Display Ads