Relationship Prescriptions with Dr. Carol

Too often narcissism seems to thrive in our churches as well as in some Christian homes. Navigating out of the pain and dysfunction involved is hard. And Chuck DeGroat has been helping churches, individuals, couples, and church systems address these issues for over 20 years. On this episode Dr. Carol talks with Chuck DeGroat about some of the deeper personal and church system factors that can lead to narcissism, and what's required to find healing both personally and in the church. If you've been harmed by narcissistic abuse you will find this insightful and healing. Connect with Chuck DeGroat on his website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Find Chuck's book When Narcissism Comes to Church: Healing Your Community From Emotional and Spiritual Abuse Check out Dr. Carol's articles: - Is My Marriage Toxic? - Good or Not-so-Good Reasons to Leave Your Church Need some personal help? Consider coaching with Dr. Carol.

Someone sitting beside you at church, at work, or at school has experienced sexual abuse or exploitation. Perhaps that's even you. Unfortuately, the Christian community's response has not always been effective. Drawing from her own story makes Trish Propson – chaplain, author, speaker, and advocate – a sensitive and engaging voice in bringing hope and healing to those who need to be set free. On this episode Dr. Carol talks with Trish to shine the light on how sexual abuse and exploitation are affecting members of the Christian community, and what the church can do about it. Connect with Trish Proposon on her website or Facebook. Additional resources from Dr. Carol: - article How to Experience God in Your Past Trauma - podcast episode with Dr. Diane Langberg What God Hates: Abuse and Trauma in the Name of God Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential comment here.

The loneliness epidemic is real, and has a larger impact on physical and mental health than most people realize. But friendship is hard and messy, perhaps more so in our culture today than ever before. Are ongoing authentic friendships really possible? And are they worth the effort and the risks? Lawyer, author, and speaker Justin Whitmel Earley joins Dr. Carol on this episode to talk about how we are all Made for People and the concept of covenant friendship. He talks vulnerably about the difficulties and risks of such friendship, but also about how this is possible regardless of your relationship status or past history. Connect with Justin Whitmel Earley on his website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Find Justin's book Made for People: Why We Drift into Loneliness and How to Fight for a Life of Friendship Check out Dr. Carol's article How to Find Your People When You Need Help Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave a confidential comment here.

Teens and young people today are swimming in, drowning in, an unhealthy culture especially around issues of sexuality and gender. Holy sexuality often seems outdated or impossible. But these questions and challenges are not new. Dr. Christopher Yuan joins Dr. Carol in this deep and empowering episode to address holy sexuality - what it is, how it differs from the contemporary mindset, where these challenges come from, and how teens and young people can be discipled to embrace a gospel-centered lifestyle and worldview around issues of sexuality and gender. Check out The Holy Sexuality Project, especially if you're a parent, grandparent, or even a church leader. Check out the previous podcast episode with Dr. Yuan, where he shares his testimony in much more detail. Find Dr. Christopher Yuan on his website, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or Youtube. Find Dr. Yuan's book Holy Sexuality and the Gospel: Sex, Desire, and Relationships Shaped by God's Grand Story Check out Dr. Carol's articles: - Practical Ways to Pursue Intimacy with God - Being the Family of God Regardless of Earthly Family - Parents, Kids, Technology – and Sex Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential message here.

"Meaningless. Meaningless. Everything is meaningless." Those depressing words are actually from the Bible. If your life and marriage are messed up and meaningless, is there any way to find growth and meaning for yourself and for your relationship? Jeff and Tami Allen say Yes. On this week's podcast they talk with Dr. Carol about their tumultuous, even traumatic, early years together, and the long journey to finding true goodness and meaning. You'll see Jeff's extremely popular comedy with a whole new perspective after hearing their story. Get Jeff's book Are We There Yet?: My Journey from a Messed Up to Meaningful Life Connect with Jeff Allen on his website, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or Youtube. Get our free download: 7 Keys to Living Fully Alive Dr. Carol loves to hear from you! You can leave her a confidential message here.

Issues around same-sex relationships are "hot topics" both in culture and in the Christian church. And what about same-sex marriage in particular? What does the Bible really say about same-sex marriage? And how should we even go about addressing these kinds of questions? On this no-holds-barred episode Dr. Carol talks with Preston Sprinkle from the Center for Faith, Sexuality, and Gender, about what the Bible has to say about what marriage IS and how that impacts our conversations around LGB issues. They address how followers of Jesus should both think and behave in theologically faithful and personally compassionate ways. Find Preston Sprinkle on his website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Check out his podcast Theology in the Raw Find Preston's book Does the Bible Support Same-Sex Marriage?: 21 Conversations from a Historically Christian View Check out Dr. Carol's article Disentangling the Connection Between Sex and Intimacy Dr. Carol loves to hear from you! You can leave her a confidential message here.

Narcissism can be an unfounded accusation, and it can also lead to marriage trauma. How do you know if you're living with a narcissist? And what if you might be one? Narcissism creates challenges for any relationship, but especially in the most intimate relationship of marriage. In this episode Dr. Carol talks with Dr. Jake Porter, relational psychotherapist, about the nuances of narcissism, why we all need a bit of it and when it becomes a problem, and some practical things you need to know if you're living with such a person. There's more hope than you may have thought possible. You can connect with Dr. Jake Porter at his personal website, the practice website, or on Facebook or Instagram. Check out his webinar Complexity: When Narcissistic, Borderline, and Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorders Co-Occur with Sex Addiction and Betrayal Trauma. Use the promo code DRCAROL for 50% off the already-low price. Check out our Dr. Carol Ministries Relationships page for additional helpful resources. And Dr. Carol would love to hear from you. You can leave a confidential comment or question here.

We all experience loss. Small or large, healing from any loss requires grieving well. Many people imagine grief only applies when a loved one dies. It certainly applies then, but for mental, relational, and spiritual health it's important to grieve all our losses. Chuck and Ashley Elliott have experienced losses - individually and together, including loss of trust through pornography use, and loss of children through repeated pregnancy loss. They talk with Dr. Carol on this episode about the impact of grief on relationships with each other, with family and friends, and with God. Connect with Chuck and Ashley Elliott on their website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Find their book I Used to Be: How to Navigate Large and Small Losses in Life and Find Your Path Forward If you have lost a loved one in death, you'll want Dr. Carol's 30-day email series The Christian's Journey Through Grief. Dr. Carol would love to hear from you. Leave a confidential comment or question here.

Questions around gender identity have become a hot topic both in culture and for many Christian families and young people. Why now? What the medical world calls "gender-affirming care" has major, often permanent, life-altering consequences. Should we be concerned? This episode features a conversation between Dr. Carol and Lori Kuykendall, president of Beacon Health Education Resources. Lori has many years of experience in ministry, health education, and the public sphere, and she has plenty to say about what she calls this "5-Alarm Fire." Find more resources at Beacon Health Education Resources specifically from a Christian faith perspective. Dr. Carol would love to hear from you. Leave a confidential comment or question here.

When you said "I do" you were expecting a connected, safe, life-giving, and intimate relationship. But you may now be wondering, "What's gone wrong?" Too many spouses end up living as roommates instead of as soulmates. You'll find yourself saying "me too" in this powerful episode as Dr. Carol outlines nine barriers to whole-person intimacy in marriage, and provides six specific keys to overcoming those barriers. And you'll hear about a practical resource to help you put those keys into practice. Check out the Fully Alive Marriage course, on sale THIS WEEK ONLY! And Dr. Carol loves to hear from you; you can leave a confidential message here.

When trust is broken in a marriage there's always an underlying story. Although behaviors absolutely matter, there's more to be addressed. Looking at the matters of the heart for both the betrayer and the betrayed spouse makes a new chapter possible - regardless of what happens in the marriage. In this episode Jessica and Ryan McDaniel talk with Dr. Carol about their story. You may first think it's Ryan's story, but keep listening; it's Jessica's story too! And then they talk about what's happened in both of their hearts, and how they now help other couples work through these very matters in their hearts also. Catch up with Ryan and Jessica McDaniel on their website. If you've been hurt in this way, join the Hope Rising virtual conference coming up on September 30. And get your ticket now; early bird pricing only lasts until July 31st. Check out these articles from Dr. Carol: - Keeping Your Sanity When Your Spouse Doesn't Meet Your Needs - The Key to Filling Your Empty Soul If your heart needs some individual care, check out Coaching with Dr. Carol.

Being married and feeling alone may be the worst loneliness of all. Whether or not sex is happening, your heart craves true intimacy. And can true connection happen even after trust has been broken? Danisa and Jorge Suarez did not have good role models to build their marriage on, but they persisted. In this episode Dr. Carol talks with them about what they learned, and their work together now as a couple helping other couples overcome sexual issues or betrayal and build the kind of intimacy they need. They also talk about their heart for helping Christian leaders who struggle in this area. Connect with Danisa and Jorge Suarez at their website CCICounseling You can find Jorge on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram You can find Danisa on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram This article from Dr. Carol Where to Start if Your Marriage Lacks Intimacy Check out our Fully Alive Marriage online course Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential message here.

If you're a parent, you are likely anxious about talking with your kids about sex. And many parents and others who care about kids feel that the ways most people have been handling "the sex talk" hasn't worked well at all. The Lindas have a different approach than you're used to seeing. In this episode Dr. Carol talks with Linda Noble and Linda Stewart, who are both educators and parents, about the deeper ideas kids need to understand about God's design for the body, sex, love, and relationships, and how parents and mentors can make this a normal part of shepherding kids and teens. Check out The Conversation Workshop site, where Linda Noble and Linda Stewart have a lot of resources available Find their book Before the Sex Talk: A Theology of the Body Approach for Parents and Mentors Check out the books by Christopher West mentioned in this episode: Theology of the Body for Beginners: Rediscovering the Meaning of Life, Love, Sex, and Gender and Our Bodies Tell God's Story: Discovering the Divine Plan for Love, Sex, and Gender Check out this resource page from Dr. Carol Ministries: Parents, Kids, Technology, and Sex Dr. Carol always loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential message here.

Relationship status is a big deal. Marriage was God's idea, and He created it to be good. But when we make something God created to be good into an idol, it becomes harmful. We can do that with marriage or parenthood. We can also do that with singleness. In this brief episode Dr. Carol addresses the harm that can come when we turn one of God's good gifts into an idol, and how we must fully live into the relationship status to which God has called us – regardless of whether married, single, or parents - or not. Check out Dr. Carol's article on this: Throwing Down the Idols of Marriage, Singleness, or Parenthood Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave a confidential message for her here.

LUST. What a disturbing word for many. Is living without lust possible? What is lust, and is it possible to have healthy sexual desire apart from lust? Dr. Carol's guest on this episode believe the answers to those questions is YES. Jay Haug is the executive director of Living Without Lust, an organization helping men who struggle with lust and supporting the Christian leaders who serve them. He shares his own story of sex addiction and the long journey to finding freedom, and what the most important keys to freedom are for anyone experiencing the control of lust. Connect with Jay Haug's organization Living Without Lust for real support and practical resources Find Jay Haug's book The Rest of God: Finding Freedom from Lust in the Internet Age Check out the ministries Jay mentioned that offer intensives to help someone with sex addiction begin the journey to recovery: Be Broken, Boulder Recovery, and Bethesda Workshops. Check out these resources from Dr. Carol Ministries: - free download A 5-Part Prescription for Sexual Healing - God's Way - online course Sexpectations Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential message here.

Our culture has politicized so much around abortion, sex trafficking, even sex addiction. Policies matter. However, it's more important to address the roots underlying such painful and difficult realities. On this episode Dr. Carol talks with Lisa Rowe who has previously worked with sex trafficking survivors and is currently executive director of Support After Abortion. But this is not primarily a discussion of abortion, but about deeper heart needs involved. Lisa shares how she learned this in her own heartbreaking story, and what kind of support makes the most difference for those who have experienced these hard things. Check out Support After Abortion Check out these articles from our blog: - Disentangling the Connection Between Sex and Intimacy - How Sex Has Lost Its Glory: Intimacy Gone Wrong Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave a confidential message for her here.

What has your heart most deeply longed for? Whether you've used these words or not, it has something to do with being safe, secure, and loved. Life often leads to deep wounds around your deepest longings. What do you do then? As a little girl Sue Moore prayed, "God, make me pretty, and happy, and give me a man who loves me." On the podcast today she talks with Dr. Carol about how different her life ended up than how she had originally hoped, how God brought rescue and goodness out of all the mess, and how she now helps others on the journey from brokenness to wholeness especially in the area of sexuality. Connect with Sue Moore at Forgiven Much Ministries Check out these articles from Dr. Carol Ministries: Disentangling the Connection Between Sex and IntimacyPractical Ways to Pursue Intimacy With God Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave a confidential message here.

Behaviors matter. Sexual behaviors matter! But focusing most on behaviors leads to "trying harder" and failing, and stops short of addressing the deep heart changes needed for lasting transformation. In this episode Dr. Carol shares the core part of her message given at the Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit. This message shows how the "problem" is less of a sex problem and more of an intimacy problem. And she addresses God's plan for intimacy as the solution, and what you can do about it. Check out our free download A 5-Part Prescription for Sexual Healing – God's Way Some of the ministries offering small groups to support you in growing in sexual wholeness: Pure Desire Ministries, Be Broken Ministries, SHE Recovery, and Living Without Lust. Dr. Carol loves to hear from you. You can leave her a confidential message here.

Marriage always takes work. But what happens when mental health struggles get added to the mix? How can both partners experience intimacy and goodness when things get messy? In this eyeopening episode Dr. Carol talks with founder and president of The Veritas Creative, Jon Seidl and his wife, Brett, a business owner and interior designer. Jon lives with significant mental health diagnoses. However, in this conversation the couple discus how their marriage has not only survived but thrived, and how those in the body of Christ can help those challenged with mental illness. Connect with Jon Seidl at The Veritas Creative, his website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram Connect with Brett Seidl on her interior design website Find Jon's books Finding Rest: A Survivor's Guide to Navigating the Valleys of Anxiety, Faith, and Life and Finding Rest Guiding Workbook: An Invitation to Go Deeper For personal help with mental health or marriage challenges, check out these courses from Dr. Carol Ministries: - Defeat Your Fear and Anxiety - Fully Alive Marriage Dr. Carol loves to hear from you! Leave her a confidential message here.

Loss is always possible when you love. But when emotional bankruptcy and loss happen repeatedly, regaining intimacy and love has even more challenges. In today's episode Dr. Carol talks with Rachel Faulkner Brown who describes herself as emotionally bankrupt during her first two marriages which both ended in death and grief. Hear how she found freedom, healing, true intimacy, and love again, and how she is now leveraging her story in helping thousands of hurting women. Connect with Rachel Faulkner Brown at Be Still Ministries and Never Alone Widows, or Facebook or Instagram. Get her Father's House Study, and enter promo code DrCarol25 for 25% off!! If you're walking through grief, you'll appreciate this 30-day email series The Christian's Journey Through Grief Dr. Carol loves to hear from you; you can leave her a confidential message here