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be weird and do good things

be weird and do good things
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be weird and do good things




The turn signal of my existence

The scene is my truck. I’m driving home after the workday and merge into the left lane. The car in front of me also merges into the left lane. The almighty nerve. I shout, “Nice turn signal mother-clucker!! 🤬” And then I look down and see that I myself also did not use my turn signal. Who’s the mother-clucker now? #trafficnews #diariespodcast support the show → fiatlux423 · Aug 15, 2018 at 5:23 pm jimi hindrance experience · Aug 15, 2018 at 5:27 pm Only about once or...


When I drive up 7th Avenue

When I drive up 7th Avenue on St. Charles’ east side, headed toward Main Street I see this older guy sitting in his garage. It’s pretty packed in there but he’s got enough room for a lawn chair right up front by the overhead door. I’ve seen him in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the early evening. Not everyday and not every time but he and his chair are fairly reliable. Earlier this spring there was about a month when he wasn’t there and I was a little concerned that something had...


When I be my best self

I’ve been working on my magazine pretty much since I got up, trying to get the July issue all done and off to the printer. Sometimes the pages and layouts just spill onto my screen effortlessly. It’ll sound kinda corny but when I do my best creative work it feels like the cosmos is directing me. That whatever I’m doing just comes out all on it’s own. Same goes with writing or whatever, too. They’re not my words, they come from somewhere else. It’s like being funny. Everybody knows that...


Do you wanna know what will really suck?

It’ll be when you notice that the someone who you’ve spent years of your life with is now gone. You’ve already grieved in the months since they left and now it’s been a few years and then you realize again, for no apparent reason, that they no longer live in the home you once shared. And you’ll think about all those moments you let slip away when you could’ve held her hand but instead chose to be grumpy because he didn’t do the laundry that one time. Yeah, that’ll suck. Maybe you’ll want...


In this icecapade parade (or life became balanced)

Wherein fate is for people who have given up, part 3 of 3. I’m going to jump right in because this story is already long enough in my head. And it’s taken far too long to write. I’ve grown weary of fate and all that it doesn’t have to offer. I’m ready for closure. So there’s this lady I kinda work with, helping with a project of hers. I get the feeling she got a few dysfunctional nuances about her. Most likely some anger management issues stoked by a little low self-esteem. My heart...


Treading water (or unfasten your seatbelts)

Wherein fate has limits, part 2 of 3. Toward the end of my drinking it was like treading water. Never going anywhere, not having any fun, just struggling to do the bare minimum to stay afloat. A soggy, pathetic, emotional mess. I was well past my reckless youth, going out and getting into trouble, wrecking cars, being thrown in jail. Well past the padded room I chased an orderly out of with a safety pin. It was just me, the liquor, and myself. Paddling in a sea of cold air in a dark,...

Within a 10 block radius

So this past weekend I pulled into the gas station to get some supplies. It’s the weekend and it’s sunny so the gas station is plum full of cars. I pull up close to the building in an empty spot. It wasn’t an official parking spot but gas stations are free-for-alls when they’re busy. One guy had even parked right in front of entrance to the gas station so whatever. I go in and get my supplies, wait in line for 10 minutes while Aunt Loretta picks out her Powerball numbers. My favorite...

You cannot unbutton this jacket

Wherein fate is a miserable state, part 1 of 3. Rivers want to roll downhill. You can put a dam up and stop their flow but their destination won’t change. They all dump into the sea. And eventually your dam will give out and then you or somebody else will build another dam but yet, still the river flows downhill. With all man’s technological marvel, water is what it is. That’s abstract and non-personal but also a good pre-game show. Because then there was that one time we were leaving a...

I eat more when I'm happy

Based on my scientific observations and the data I’ve collected as of late, I’ve found that I eat more when I’m happy. When I’m stressed I don’t want to eat at all. Now then, please note that I’ve gained 37 pounds over the last two months. In related news, I don’t know why I wear white. Because then everybody knows what I’ve been eating. So the interesting part of this story. While I was amusing myself with my formula on the drive to work, a feeling came blurting its way into my...


Post mortem, Bourdain

The thing that I had a hard time wrapping my mind around with Anthony Bourdain's suicide is that I kept thinking he was supposed to be above all of that. I wanted not to be surprised but I really was. I felt let down at first regardless of what I said. I don’t have the kind of heroes or as many of them as I did when I was a teenager but Bourdain may have been the closest thing I had to a celebrity hero as a grown-up. From the time he was a teenager, through his 20s and 30s, on into his...


Unless I'm a celebrity gardener

Not long ago I was reading an article wherein the author said that people aren’t going to care about what you’re doing. Like if I plant a wonderful garden people aren’t going to come from miles around to see it. They won’t throw flowers and shower me with attention. Unless I’m a celebrity gardener, nobody will care. How the author believed it did work was like this: if I care about you and your garden then you in turn will care about me and my garden. Of course there’s no black and white...


Red faced robot

So I have this thing that I’ve been doing ever since I was a teenager. It’s not a healthy thing and I’ve struggled to let go of it ever since I stopped drinking. Most of the time I don’t even realize I’m doing it until after I’ve already done it. In the last several weeks I realized just how bad the behavior is. How it takes me out of the moment and distracts me from all that I have and all that's truly important. So I've paying attention in life and seek not to put myself in the...


Reich Between the Eyes on the Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus soundtrack

More Peeps, the soundtrack for Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus was released today digitally. I’m sure you’ve all been waiting for it just as I have. I’ve only listened to the first five songs but it’ll punch you in the teeth for sure. If you’re into that. Reich Between the Eyes will be one song I’ll never listen to while driving for sure. I can feel the road rage amplifying already. Also, Bethesda put the whole album up as one animated still on...


Share the road with bikes?

How about they go the speed limit? Or obey the traffic signals? Or decide if they’re going to be on the street or the sidewalk? I ride my bike as much as anybody. Okay, that’s not true. I have a bike in my garage and I’ve only ridden a few times this year. But I’ve seen the guy at Sammy’s Bikes race around town, blow through stop signs, make wild ass turns without warning, weave around cars, all like he’s in a race to win the World Cup. When I do ride my bike if I’m on the sidewalk then I...


I fucked this up

I set up an auto-renew feature on a client’s website not long ago so members could check a box and have their member account renewed each year. It’s a win-win for the client and the member since neither would need to do anything. The client would collect their membership dues and the member would have uninterrupted access to the site. Hurray! However. When the first member selected the option their credit card was charged twice. And then of course it happened to the second member. After...


It forever influences the present

I was talking with one of my friends several months ago and I brought up something that sounded an alarm in her. What I’d just touched on triggered an unhappiness almost like ripping someone’s blanket off on a chilly night when they’re sound asleep. I don’t know who first used the blanket analogy but I love it so much that it works its way into the things I write. But anyways, you fuck people up and you won’t be able to take that shit back. It’s unfortunate that I can’t be my best self...


A frantic game of animal tag

On this morning, the 11th of June I was greeted with a squeaky chipmunk in the basement just as I sat down with my first cup of coffee. It filled my heart with joy as the two H-Ks (hunter killers) and a lone chipmunk played a frantic game of animal tag. A frenzied game of hide and seek if you will. Where if you lose needly claws hooked to hair trigger tendons pulled by honed muscles will rip into your hide and not too often let go. You'll be lucky and kiss your mother if you narrowly escape...


The geese on Riverside

Every time the geese hold up traffic on Riverside for more than five seconds, 50 cars deep pile up in both directions. I just want to punch them in the face. Every last one. The geese and the cars. Also: don’t wave to people while they’re out with their dog and the dog is taking a poop. It’ll make them uncomfortable. Both the person and the dog. #trafficnews #socialgraces #diariespodcast support the show → Add a comment! View original


So then I rewrote parts

One time when I was eight or so I was out in the front yard washing my bike with the hose. I especially liked spraying the pedals and watching them spin out of control. My bikes have been near and dear to me ever since I learned how to ride and I took great pride in washing this one since it was my first main bike. My oldest brother, who is eight years older, came home during my wash cycle with a carload of his friends. They were all teenagers and way cool in their rock band t-shirts and...


One particular night in Wyoming

And then there was that one time in 2006 when my brother and I drove halfway across the country in a U-Haul the size of Montana, pulling the Kia on a trailer. We were on an epic journey, moving from the state of Oregon to the state of Illinois. One particular night in Wyoming we were ready to call it good for the day, might’ve been around 11:30 pm. My brother insisted we get off on the next exit and look for a hotel. He was ready to get his drink on and that didn’t sound half bad to me...