The Interracial Couple

Change is inevitable in all areas of life, whether it's business or relationships. This ultimately means that our expectations and commitments need to be reassessed as time goes on. How do you know when to stick with the commitments you made, or when to pivot or quit once and for all. On this episode, Cera speaks on the burnout she feels after podcasting for 70 weeks straight. Will this be our last podcast?

Does everyone have a sense of humor? What if what your partner finds funny is not a joke to you? How do you handle inappropriate or even offensive jokes? On this episode, we discuss what makes us laugh as per the prompts of Week 21 from The Lover's Journal. How important laughter is to a relationship, and where humoring fosters the health of a relationship and when it becomes toxic.

Being in a long distance relationship can be deliberate or circumstantial. Regardless of how we find ourselves far apart from our partners, we need to embrace the positives of being in a long distance relationship, while bracing for the downsides of it. On today's episode, we discuss what really constitutes a long distance relationship, what makes it worthy, and whether it's for everyone or depends on your personalities or stage you're in in life.

Traveling as a couple, more so as an interracial couple, has its benefits as well as challenges. On this episode, Matthew and I discuss the experiences we have had traveling solo and as a couple, and also traveling in our home towns versus traveling to other cities and distant lands. This follows the monthly challenge #11 from The Lover's Journal: This month you are going to be a tourist in your own town. Go the the museum, take the train to downtown, visit the farmer market, and whatever else your city is known for.

I am my worst critic. Yet what I've learnt in relationships is that, when we criticize ourselves so harshly, we are bound to also lack empathy when dealing with our partners. On this episode of The Interracial Couple Podcast, we look at how we can improve our relationship by becoming more encouragers and less of critics.

To be right or to be happy? That is the question. To be right, you only need to crash your partner's or family's arguments and pride until they give up the fight. To be happy though, requires humility and self reflection. Because like it or not, we are always wrong in life as Kathryn Schulz writes in her book, Being Wrong; Adventures in the Margin of Error. In this rerun of Episode 32, we touch on the question of what is more important: being right or happy in a relationship?

Matthew and I have a hard time accepting compliments and love back, yet we welcome criticism way better. Does this mean criticism is our love language? On this episode, as per the Week 15 prompts of The Lover's Journal, we discuss what we admire most about each other as lovers, and what we need to do so our relationship can grow from just good to healthier and enduring.

Cheesiness is one of the qualities that have constantly served to keep our relationship healthy? Saying and doing the cheesy stuff is always easy at the beginning of a relationship. What happens though when the relationship is confirmed to be a longterm one? On this episode of The Interracial Couple, we discuss the cheesy things that still define us after 4 years of dating and their impact. Along with this, as part of Week 14 prompts from The Lover's Journal, we talk about what are the top on the list of important things in our relationship.

Self doubt sabotages all our relations since trust is the basis of them all. And if you cannot trust yourself, why should anyone trust you? Therefore overcoming self doubt is critical not just for the individual but also for the benefit of all the relationships they are in. How then can a partner help when one is struggling with self doubt? Is there anything family and friends can do to help someone who doesn't trust or love themselves? Share your thoughts with us below

Do you and your partner have challenges communicating? Cera and I had communication issues too. We had to put in a lot of inner work to get to a point where we can communicate our needs with clarity. On this episode of The Interracial Couple we discuss how we overcame our communication troubles, and also our responses to the Lover's Journal prompts for Week 12: 1. What are the 3 elements that make your relationship wonderful/ meaningful? 2. What is the 1 challenge from your relationship that your now see its benefit to your life/ love life?

It's easy to ignore the magic of the everyday, normal routine parts of our relationships as we seem to treasure the 'big' events we organize with our partners, no? The guided prompts for Week 11 of The Lover's Journal reminded us to value 'the usual' parts of our day together as lovers. So on this episode, we cover: 1. The most recent event we had that we want to cherish forever 2. What little thing each of us does that makes the other feel warm inside 3. What each partner does that is expected and can sometimes go unacknowledged 4. The importance of authenticity in the genesis of a relationship

After our anniversary weekend I ended up in a funk. Drinking has that depressing effect on me sometimes. I tried all I could to get rid of the grumpiness: yoga, reading, Netflix, long showers... Nothing worked. Not even talking to my partner, Matthew. Fortunately, he did not take it personal (and wondered how I could mark our anniversary with sorrows and questioning the choices I've made in my life) nor did he take it upon himself to 'fix' me. It wasn't until we had our regular TikTok live and interacted with our online community there that my mood looked up. I did not do much apart from listening and sharing my experience with relationships. Yet by helping someone else make sense of their own blues, mine went away too. How do you handle those moments of unexplainable sadness? How about your partner's unhappiness?

Expression of gratitude is essential in a relationship. This way a partner never gets to feel that their generosity is being taken for granted. This is not to say that generosity is done with the expectation of something being done in return. In this week's episode, we discuss the things we're grateful to our for: from Cera's choice to adopt levity when tough times come, to Matthew continuing on with the morning kiss challenge from last month. The Lover's Journal Week 10 prompts are: 1. List 6 things that your partner did this week that you're grateful for 2. Come up with one thing you can do to show appreciation for your partner this week 3. What is something you can do to bring pizazz and aliveness into your relationship this week?

Self discovery and self mastery are things you constant work on whether you're single or in a relationship. And needless to say, the journey to discover yourself and be in control of this identity is pretty hard. This is particularly difficult for people who date outside of their culture as any interracial couple will admit. This week we meditated on the need to assess how much we've discovered of ourselves and partner since we started journaling, and how we can hold onto these in service of the relationship. This follows the journaling prompts for The Lover's Journal Week 10: 1. Whats one new discovery you've made about yourself since you started journaling? 2. Whats one new discovery you've made about your lover since you started journaling? 3. How can you remain open to your lover's needs while staying true to yourself? Kindly share your thoughts with us

Do you remember your first date? How magical was it? Is the magic from your most memorable date still there in your relationship? This week lets discuss our favorite dating experiences following The Lover's Journal Week 7 prompts: 1. What is your favorite date that you have ever been to with your partner? 2. What made it so? 3. What 1 thing can you do to bring some of that magic into this week? Share with us your most magical experiences below

Why is it so difficult for us to forgive ourselves and others? is it because forgiveness connotes something too big than can be done everyday? One this week's episode, we discuss forgiveness following The Lover's Journal prompts for Week 6: 1. Look at the last week, or the last time, when your lover upset you and write about it from their perspective 2. Look at the last week, or the last time, when you upset your lover and write about it from their perspective 3. Take a deep breath. Forgive the other. Forgive yourself. How do you feel? Share with us your take on the above prompts.

What does your partner do that makes you feel seen and understood? On the other hand, is there something you do that would make them complain they feel unseen and misunderstood? Also I was super-excited after getting engaged over the Valentine's Day weekend, but now I'm already feeling overwhelmed with post-engagement blues. I thought we'd enjoy marital bliss for longer that a week? Is this normal? On this episode of the Interracial Couple, we dive into one of the toughest sections of The Lover's Journal. This week we explore the dark sides of ourselves that need working through -following these prompts: 1. I Feel SEEN and UNDERSTOOD by my Partner When..? 2. I Feel MisUNDERSTOOD and UNSEEN by my Partner When..? 3. How can I share the first with Gratitude and the second one with non-accusatory compassion? What came to mind when you read these prompts? Kindly share with us below And if you wish to get a free sample of The Lover's Journal, check out our website www.loversunlimited.co

Are all lovers predestined to meet? I believe Cera and I were predestined to meet and fall in love. I also believe it's predestined that today's the last day I call her my girlfriend. Are we breaking up? On today's episode, we explore the question of predestination, the origins of the challenges featured in The Lover's Journal, and our entries to the journaling prompts for week 5: 1. What mutual goals would you like to accomplish with your lover this year? 2. What specific actions can you and your lover take to make these happen? 3. How can you remain open to your lover's need while remaining true to yourself?

On this week's episode we take on The Lover's Journal prompts for Week 4: 1. What are the things you admire most about your significant other? 2. What can you do to support your lover's dreams and goals? 3. What words do you want to hear from your partner this week?

The Lover’s Journal prompts for this week are: 1. What is your most treasured memory with your lover? 2. 1 thing you can improve in your relationship this week is? 3. What little thing can you do this week to bring more love into your relationship? So on this episode of The Interracial Couple Podcast we discuss: -How love is a journey with happy in betweens -not happy endings -The memories of our first night in our Kenyan and California homes -The need for partners to know how to handle each other’s struggles -How our moods and attitudes towards challenges in life affects our relationships -Our vision to become better communicators Share your answers to the above prompts with us below: