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If It's Not 1 Thing It's Your Mother

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Being a mother is an attitude. Not biology. All our stories begin with her. No matter how you slice it, if it's not 1 thing, it's your mother.

Being a mother is an attitude. Not biology. All our stories begin with her. No matter how you slice it, if it's not 1 thing, it's your mother.
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Being a mother is an attitude. Not biology. All our stories begin with her. No matter how you slice it, if it's not 1 thing, it's your mother.






Encore Episode - Alexis Rhone Fancher - Cruel Choices

We're telling stories. Raw honest unapologetic episode about life after the death of this writer's son. She holds nothing back. Alexis Rhone Fancher is an award winning poet and photographer. She has been published in Best American Poetry 2016, Rattle, Hobart, Verse Daily, Plume, Tinderbox, Cleaver, and elsewhere. Her books include: How I Lost My Virginity to Michael Cohen…, State of Grace: The Joshua Elegies, Enter Here, and Junkie Wife. The Dead Kid Poems, the follow up to State of...


Encore Episode - Anonymous - Barnacles

We're telling stories. Today’s guest is a best selling novelist and an all around wonderful writer. She wrote a beautiful piece for this podcast and then called us with a special request-- that we keep her identity anonymous. Who doesn't speak to their mother? What do you do when you have a toxic relationship with your mom? When the mother you want, is not the mother you have? When you are looking for courage or permission to put your well-being first, to live in your truth? What do you...


Ep 35 - Benjamin Davis - Playlist for my Mother's Funeral

Benjamin Davis shares his poem, The Playlist At My Mother’s Funeral. We talk about how his mother would like a party when she dies which got him thinking of the playlist and how the songs that remind him of his mother and also track his memories with her throughout his childhood. Our conversation went from his rebellious teens and how he thought his parents showed great restraint for not throwing him in the basement and only feeding him scraps to the time when we all come to the realization...


Ep 34 - Tresha Faye Haefner

Tresha Faye Haefner shares with us a poem about her childhood in paradise California. We talk about the wants and rebellion of youth and how when you’re a kid with the security of a loving family, you don’t have the life experience to appreciate just how lucky you are. She also shares how one should listen to a poem. Several of our brilliant guests came to us through Tresha - Alexis Rhone Fancher (Cruel Choices ep 6) Elya Braden (How to Be a Bad Mother ep 8), and Kelly Grace Thomas (How...


Ep 33 - Katie Manglis - She Never Said I Love You

What's more important-- saying I love you or showing it through our actions? In this episode we take a look at that. We're telling stories and having meaningful conversations about whatever they bring up. Our guest is Katie Manglis. After her mother died when she was just a baby, her grandmother, Yiayia, stepped in to fill the void. Katie Manglis grew up in Cyprus in the 1970s and 80s and dreamed of becoming a paleontologist and discovering new dinosaurs. Instead, she ended up working in...


Ep 32 Diane Pomerantz - Yearnings for the Stork

Imagine having to give your baby back. This week's episode we hear about a mother having to ride the wave of uncertainty during adoption. Dr. Diane Pomerantz is a Baltimore area psychologist who has been in practice for the past 39 years working with children and their families. She is a blogger for Psychology Today and has published articles and poetry in Motherwell Magazine, Adoption Today, Story Circle Journal and other literary magazines. Her memoir, Lost in the Reflecting Pool,...


Encore Episode - Dan Bucatinsky - Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight?

It's Pride Month and we had to re release this episode! A father discovering the mother within. Dan Bucatinsky reads this hilarious excerpt his memoir "DOES THIS BABY MAKE ME LOOK STRAIGHT?" Dan Bucatinsky is an actor, writer, producer and author. You recognize him from a million things like Second Act, The Post and Under the Tuscan Sun, but Dan is probably best known for his role as James Novak in Scandal. And you'll be able to see him on his new show this fall (2019) in ABC's The Baker &...


Ep 30 - Richard Valenza - The Secret

When a mother's reaction is disappointing, is not the support you were needing or hoping for, remember to keep a window open in your relationship because, one day she may just surprise you. We’re telling stories Rich Valenza is our guest today. He is the Founder and CEO of RaiseAChild,a national nonprofit organization building loving families for foster children®. RaiseAChild recruits, educates, and nurtures supportive relationships equally with all prospective foster and adoptive parents...


Ep 29 - Gina Piccalo - Silver Linings

We learn so much from our children. In this episode, Gina Piccalo reads from her not yet published memoir. When you had a troubled childhood and your daughter wants you to tell her bedtime stories from that time, how do you play it? In this touching story, Gina talks about the gift of seeing her story through her daughter's eyes, and the healing that has since taken place with her relationship with her own mother. Gina Piccalo spent a decade on staff at the Los Angeles Times covering...


Ep 28 - Shari Walker Quan - Heart Mom/Bio Mom

Being a mother is an attitude, not Biology. That is our tagline and that's what this entire episode is about. SHARI WALKER is a former foster youth who entered the foster care system at age fourteen. She talks about different mothering she received from her birth mom (Bio Mom) and "the first person who wasn't being paid to be with her" (her Heart Mom) after she aged out of the foster care system. Shari graduated from California State University Northridge, where she majored in African...


Ep 27 - Clay Rivers - excerpt from Walking Tall

Operating in this world with what others may think of as challenges - being black, a little person, gay, and Christian, Clay Rivers reminds us that we all have challenges that we are walking around with. Some people’s challenges are more hidden. Clay wears his out loud. I can do it myself! The way he entered into this world was a perfect match for the mother he was born to. She knew that faith, self respect, respect of others and taking personal responsibility was key to fully becoming...


Ep 26 - Jack Grapes Part 2 - Making Art out of Pain

Jack Grapes, renowned Los Angeles writing teacher and award-winning poet read a poem in episode 25 that he wrote 50 years ago, after the death of his mother. This week in the rest of our conversation, he discusses how to write from an authentic deep place inside. And we talk about turning our pain into art. There are two beautiful excerpts from poets (and previous guests) Alexis Rhone Fancher (episode 6) and Chanel Brenner (episode 21). Jack Grapes, is a poet, playwright, actor, teacher and...


Ep 25 - Jack Grapes - Part One - Letter from My Mother

Imagine receiving a letter from your mother a few years after she died. Imagine the letter is blank. That is the story our writer tells us this week. Jack Grapes, renowned writing teacher and award-winning poet reads a poem he wrote 50 years ago after the death of his mother. He hadn't read it in decades, and it brought up a lot of unexpected feelings. Jack Grapes, is a poet, playwright, actor, teacher and founding editor of the literary journal ONTHEBUS. He is the author of 13 books of...


Ep 24 - Evie Gold - When Things are the Same, But Not at All

Life is complicated and communication can often feel like a tightrope walk. Taking your mom off the pedestal you have put her on and seeing her as a human being, flaws and all, is part of growing up. And learning to navigate the ups and downs of all meaningful relationships is one of the things we talk about this week. (We also discuss Rosie Waterland's podcast Mum says My Memoir is a Lie - highly recommend!) EVIE GOLD is a non-fiction essayist whose personal stories focus on love, family,...


Ep 23 - Ben Barnz - excerpt from the memoir, We

Imagine being instantly 8 months pregnant. In this adoption story, our guest Ben Barnz reads an excerpt from his book We: an adoption and a memoir. He shares how he and his husband came to be parents and how the birthmother of his child made them a We. Ben Barnz, in addition to being a memoirist, is an independent film and television producer. He frequently collaborates with his husband, filmmaker Daniel Barnz. Together they formed We’re Not Brothers Productions, so named because everyone...


Ep 22 - Linda Freund - Tripping with Mom

Here’s a question we are curious about: Do you teach your kids how to party responsibly? Did your mom teach you? Shouldn't we talk about how to parent when it comes to teens’ drinking and drug use? We all know that "just say no" is neither an effective nor a realistic tactic. Today’s story opens up an honest conversation about drugs, alcohol, teens and our roles as mothers. Linda Freund shares her day of mushroom trippin' with Bonnie, her mom. And she looks back fondly on the lessons she...


Ep 21 - Chanel Brenner - Navigating Loss

Life is a beautiful thing if you can navigate all the loss. Once your child dies you’re still their mother. In this episode our guest shares the death of her 6 year old son and her journey of navigating that loss. Chanel Brenner shares how she listened and trusted her inner voice, “You know how to survive the loss of your child. Everyone has their own grief journey.” She reminds us to be respectful of each others grief process. Putting boundaries around grief, helped her marriage survive...


Ep 20 - Parker Lulu Sacavitch - A Different Teenage Mother Story

A take on motherhood from a girl who is just entering womanhood. What happens when you are a teen, terrified to leave the nest and go to college? You create your comfort zone, your college family. Parker Sacavitch is a college freshman at Emerson College in Boston. She's currently studying screenwriting, but she's tried writing everything from angsty poetry to horoscopes and everything in between. Her goal is to one day work in the world of children's animated television. You can follow...


Ep 19 - Dan Moore - His Mom is a Star

The power of letting the ones you love, know what they mean to you is what we are talking about in this episode. Sometimes our children see us as whole humans and not just “Mom”. And that exchange deepens and enriches the relationship. Dan Moore is a writer based in San Francisco. His work has appeared in many places online. He is also editor of the online magazines P.S. I Love You, The Bold Italic, and Minutes. You can follow him on Twitter @dmowriter and read more of his writing...


Ep 18 - Tanya Davis - Patterns Repeating... or not

We’re telling stories We talk about the sadnesses that can be passed on to our children. Or sadness of our mother's that we sometimes take on as our own. How do we ease a burden and not take it on ourselves? Eternal questions. Tanya Davis is a writer, performer, and musician currently based in Montréal, Québec. She has released 4 albums and 2 books of poetry, including an illustrated version of the widely popular videopoem on YouTube, How to be Alone (made in collaboration with Andrea...