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Owning your Shit in Love: A conversation with Shane Birkel

Couples come to therapy for a myriad of reasons. But often, the real reason why they’re showing up is the thing hidden underneath their reasons. The solution is nearly always found in holding a magnifying lens up in those moments of conflict and, as this week’s guest Shake Birkel says, “owning our shit”. Suddenly, “Why is he/she doing this to me?” shifts into an opportunity to sit with our emotions and recalibrate our connections. Shane Birkel, a therapist and fellow podcaster, is no...


Am I Normal? Talking about Sex: A conversation with Megan Torrey-Payne

Sex is a difficult topic for most of us to discuss. What we like, what we don’t like, where the edges of our boundaries are, what is normal and what isn’t, what our children need to know and when… And yet, it is such an all-encompassing thing in what it means to be human, it has roots and ties in nearly every facet of our existence. Ultimately, what we all secretly want to know is, “Am I normal?” Our fears, discomfort and shame around sex aren’t entirely our faults. Had we all been raised...


Intensive Restructuring: A conversation with Adam Smithey

What could you accomplish with your clients in just one weekend? This week’s guest, Adam Smithey, dares us to dream “outside the box” into what is possible: how we can make the most impact, what our clients are really asking us for, and how we can better integrate our work into our everyday lives. For him, that means being a stay-at-home dad during the week and running couples intensives on the weekends. Adam finds that he is able to complete six months of work with his couples in just two...


Carefrontation In The Present Moment: A conversation with Tom Murray

“Our thoughts create our suffering” is not an uncommon idea. But what does that really mean for our relationships, our past traumas, or the present realities? In this episode, Rebecca talks with Tom Murray, a sex and couples therapist in Greensboro, NC, about the significance of the present moment, and what it proves about truth and endurance. Tom tells Rebecca about his “carefrontational” approach with clients and how he helps them to see where they’re creating their own suffering. They...


Cultural Competency for Helpers: A conversation with Natalie Overton

When we are working to make a positive impact in a community, who is being left out of the conversation? Who isn’t being seen? Empathy starts with relationships and the mirrors those relationships hold up for us. When we are interested in joining in the conversation of diversity and inclusivity, it can be challenging to know where to start, how to jump in, or who to ask for support. It feels scary. No one wants to do it wrong. But what relational work teaches us is that by looking at...


American Collective Consciousness: A Conversation with Molly Merson

This conversation undulates between the current state and issues within our collective consciousness as Americans living in today’s social and political climate to the individual in how we deal with self-reflection, trauma, and loss--beautifully illustrating the now proverbial rally cry, “The personal is political.” Rebecca and Berkeley-based therapist Molly Merson, MFT cover it all, from our political “parents” to our collective infancy on the internet, to grief and loss and metabolizing...


Intentions and New Pathways: A conversation with Benjamin Reisterer

In our ever increasingly more technology-driven world, it is becoming even more imperative that we drop down into our physical bodies to understand what we feel and notice how it shows up for us in our bodies. There is so much information to be had in our sensory and intuitive experiences, if we’ll only take the time to notice it. And this information can show us not only how we react or respond to others, but also how we can shift cultural paradigms. So, it is only fitting that this...


Holiday Special: Relationship Rumble Strips

The Practice of Being Seen podcast offers a collection of curated discussions to therapists and anyone interested in deep restorative transformation, through relationship. Relationship Therapist and host, Rebecca Wong, believes that when you truly see yourself you create a ripple effect that allows you to be the change you wish to see in the world -- and that invites everyone around you to do the same. This is the basis of her signature method, Connectfulness®. However, we offer you a...


Laura Carr: Compassionate Conscious Relationships

What would happen if you integrated themes from humanistic, existential, and attachment theory with the flavor of Zen Buddhism? You might have something like this week’s guest Laura Carr’s therapeutic method: Compassion-Based Awareness Therapy. As much as our culture loves a quick fix 12-step program, there are no quick pathways to behavior change. In fact, behavior is typically the last thing to change. But there are many opportunities along the way to dial into what we feel, allow...


Beth Luwandi Lofstrom: The Gentle Benevolent Observer

If you were to ask a room full of people whether or not they’ve ever cheated on a partner or have been cheated on by a partner, you’d likely get every single person to say “yes” to one or the other, if not both. Affairs are such a common thing in intimate relationships. And, so profoundly painful--certainly for the partner who was betrayed by the affair, but also, according to this week’s guest Beth Luwandi Lofstrom, for the offender. When we cheat, it has a way of really getting at the...


Monica Day: Sexuality On The Continuum of Sensuality

What if who we are in the bedroom is who we are in life? If we are sensual beings experiencing the world through physical bodies, then what can our inner knowing and intuition tell us about safety and risk--both in sex and in life? How do we create intimacy and can we relocate our innocence? And what does it mean if we spend most of our lives at odds with our bodies, when so much of our inner knowing is wrapped up in our becoming attuned to our bodies and sensual experiences? For...


Cyndi Darnell: Mindful Sex: Pleasure, Power, Permission

Sex is a richly complex part of being human and there’s no one way to experience it. It can be a catalyst for spiritual connection or a source of deep trauma. It thrives on play. It emphasizes pleasure for pleasure’s sake. It enacts politics and power plays. It insists on respect and permission. And, in our culture, it is tightly bound to shame. This week’s guest is Cyndi Darnell, one of Australia’s leading sex and relationship therapists, and she asks us to consider what would change...


43: What Men Need in Therapy: A Conversation with John Harrison

In a field where, more often than not, women tend to be the ones more often drawn to our therapy practices, working with male clients in a therapy practice can pose unique challenges. Men generally aren’t equipped to talk about their feelings in the same ways that women are and they can often feel like their sense of self is under attack while under the clinical microscope. Today’s guest, John Harrison, knows quite a bit about this as a certified Relational Life Therapist, a facilitator...


Ep. 42: Being in Integrity with Your Finances: A conversation with Tiffany McLain

Money as a conversation piece is as taboo as sex. It’s as difficult to discuss as racism. We simply just don’t go there very well. And, it’s not really our fault. We generally aren’t taught how to have a healthy relationship with money. We don’t have good (or any) mentorship around it in our careers and we certainly don’t bring money into conversations within the clinical space. There’s something about money that brings up all the shame and fear. And yet, it is as necessary to our modern...


Bonus: The Mentorship Program

I've had some realizations about my mentorship program that I wanted to share with you. I may not be doing what is recommended, but I am doing what feels right for me. I hope you will also give yourself permission to also do what feels right for you.


Ep. 41: Releasing Your Inner Badass: A Conversation with Laura Long

When we first start out in private practice, when we launch that new offering--anytime we do something new--uncertainty always plays a role. We prepare and plan as much as we can, of course, but the real clarity comes from doing. Still, that doesn’t stop the fears, the risk of failure, the shame feelings from presenting themselves, does it? Laura Long, LMFT wants us all to undo all of those fears by unleashing our inner badass. Today she chats with me about how her coaching business,...


Ep. 40: Seeds of Sustainable Self Care: A Conversation with Dr. Matt Hersh

What is your relationship to self-care? Self-care is quite the buzzword these days, both within our chosen field of work but also in mainstream media and culture. As therapists, we know it is a vital part of our practices to avoid burnout, compassion fatigue, and vicarious traumatization. In other words, it helps us to do the work better, to show up more fully for our clients and for our families outside of work. But, for all we know about self-care, and for all the tips and tricks...


Ep. 39: On Allyship & Cultural Competency: A conversation with Dr. Joy Harden Bradford

People of color--black women in particular--have always been an underserved population when it comes to therapy. Though there are many factors, one important one that we therapists can work on changing is a matter of trust and safety. A lot of black women want a black therapist because of fear of being misunderstood by a therapist who can’t relate to (or worse, disbelieves) their experiences. In this present social climate, this is a conversation we all need to have with ourselves and our...


Ep 38: Reframing Imposter Syndrome: A Conversation with Melody Wilding

Fraud feelings and overwhelm. Squelched desires and jealousy. How do you differentiate between fears designed to keep you safe and fears beckoning you to toward your potential? The friction of change during growth periods in our lives is never very comfortable, but for all our fears, we rarely meet our utter demise on the other side. So, why is it so hard to break through it? And what can we learn about ourselves from it? Episode 38 of the #POBScast puts Imposter Syndrome under the...


Ep. 37: Brave Gathering: A conversation with Lizzy Russinko

Something magical happens when people gather together in the same space. Something that can’t happen in online gathering spaces in quite the same way. Gatherings take many forms: Retreats, workshops, conferences. Walk-outs, protests, sit-ins. Tea parties, play groups, picnics. But the one unifier is that buzz, the energy, that each person feels when they’re there. A buzz they’ll each carry with them long after. That’s what I’m talking about with this week’s guest, Lizzy Russinko of The...


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