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Sunday School Dropouts

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An ex-Christian (Lauren O’Neal) and a nonbelieving sort-of Jew (Niko Bakulich) read the entire Bible, cover to cover, so you don’t have to. If you’ve ever been curious about what’s actually in the bestselling book in history but never found the time to read it, we’ve got you covered. Sunday School Dropouts is kind of like Mystery Science Theater 3000 for the Bible, or like listening to a recap of your favorite show, if your favorite show was about polygamous shepherds on very strict diets. The weird, the wacky, the wonderful—we’ll clue you in on everything they didn’t teach you in Sunday school.

An ex-Christian (Lauren O’Neal) and a nonbelieving sort-of Jew (Niko Bakulich) read the entire Bible, cover to cover, so you don’t have to. If you’ve ever been curious about what’s actually in the bestselling book in history but never found the time to read it, we’ve got you covered. Sunday School Dropouts is kind of like Mystery Science Theater 3000 for the Bible, or like listening to a recap of your favorite show, if your favorite show was about polygamous shepherds on very strict diets. The weird, the wacky, the wonderful—we’ll clue you in on everything they didn’t teach you in Sunday school.
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Location:

United States

Description:

An ex-Christian (Lauren O’Neal) and a nonbelieving sort-of Jew (Niko Bakulich) read the entire Bible, cover to cover, so you don’t have to. If you’ve ever been curious about what’s actually in the bestselling book in history but never found the time to read it, we’ve got you covered. Sunday School Dropouts is kind of like Mystery Science Theater 3000 for the Bible, or like listening to a recap of your favorite show, if your favorite show was about polygamous shepherds on very strict diets. The weird, the wacky, the wonderful—we’ll clue you in on everything they didn’t teach you in Sunday school.

Language:

English


Episodes

Hebrews

11/19/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss high priests, the mystery of Melchizedek, an alternate take on Jacob and Esau, and everything else in the Epistle to the Hebrews. Plus: this book was definitely written by a woman, and maybe we actually like it!

Duration: 01:06:00


Philemon

11/12/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss digital monsters, Biblical views of slavery, Paul using his passive-aggressiveness for good, and everything else in the Epistle to Philemon. Plus: enough alternate Bible translations to choke the Behemoth, and a very special crab (who is a scorpion).

Duration: 00:58:07


Gospel and Apocalypse of Peter

10/29/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss a bizarre, alternate Easter story, the humanity and divinity of the apocryphal Jesus, a Dante-esque tour of the early Christian afterlife, and everything else in the apocryphal Gospel and Apocalypse of Peter. Plus: Niko does some fast facts, and Lauren learns a lesson!

Duration: 00:56:44


Titus

10/22/2017
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Ryan Honaker joins us to talk about the Book of Mormon, greenies and comps proselytizing in Poland, Jesus’s vacation to the Americas, and everything else about growing up Mormon. Also: the book of Titus is in there somewhere.

Duration: 01:15:27


1 and 2 Timothy

10/15/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss the widow test, morality in the end times, and everything else in the books of 1 and 2 Timothy. Plus: a cider problem and Who’s Your Bible Dad?

Duration: 00:57:30


The Didache

10/8/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss old-school communion, Christian conmen, rules for Jewish Christians, and everything else in the apocryphal Didache. Plus: filthy talking, and Niko’s hunt for mummy honey continues?

Duration: 00:55:12


Acts of Peter

10/1/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss talking dogs, a magician battle, the upside-down cross, and everything else in the apocryphal Acts of Peter. Plus: Niko wants mummy honey, and cat curses go where they’ve never gone before!

Duration: 01:00:39


Rerun: Robobible

9/24/2017
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There's no new episode this week, but we're delighted to rerun a favorite of ours from the beginning of the second season! Original show notes: Niko and Lauren feed the text of the Bible to an artificial-intelligence program and have it create its own Bible passage. With the help of Rose Eveleth (@roseveleth), Greg (@leducviolet), Mallory Ortberg, Ezekiel Kweku (@theshrillest), and J. W. Friedman, they discuss being a donkey as the mountain shall do to the sky, making gold of the purple,...

Duration: 00:54:31


2 Thessalonians

9/17/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss the lawless one, welfare in the Bible, and everything else in the book of 2 Thessalonians. Plus: Dr. Jason Staples (@jasonstaples) joins us to talk about Paul’s eschatology and why Paul is so obsessed with Gentiles. (Hint: it’s not circumcision!)

Duration: 00:58:10


1 Thessalonians

9/10/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss sending Timothy all over the world, footnotes about Satan, and everything else in Paul’s First Epistle to the Thessalonians. Plus: Tasbeeh Herwees joins us to talk about how Jesus is portrayed in Islam and how Jesus bumper stickers are not unique to Christians.

Duration: 01:00:19


Colossians

9/3/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss the Colossian heresy, possible gnosticism, a spooky mummy, and everything else in the book of Colossians. Plus: Writer and astrologer Luke Dani Blue joins us to read Jesus’s horoscope.

Duration: 01:03:43


Acts of Thomas Part 2

8/27/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss the Hymn of the Pearl, twin pranks, weird baptism rituals, and everything else in the second half of the apocryphal Acts of Thomas. Plus: the best character gets screwed over, and more gnosticism!

Duration: 01:02:35


Acts of Thomas Part 1

8/20/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss Jesus’ twin brother Thomas, celibate marriage, a spiritual palace scam, another exploding dragon, and everything else in the first half of the apocryphal Acts of Thomas. Plus: Hell is weird, but Heaven’s even weirder, and you can all log off!

Duration: 00:58:13


Gospel of Thomas

8/13/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss Gnosticism, the Demiurge, the Pleroma, and all the rest of the secret mystical knowledge in the apocryphal Gospel of Thomas. Plus: How to Be a Spiritual Robot, and more anti-body propaganda.

Duration: 01:02:19


Philippians

8/6/2017
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Lauren and Niko welcome Dr. Chris Stroop to the show to talk about growing up Christian in Indiana, a twenty-year crisis of faith, battling demons Hulk-style, and everything else in the book of Philippians. Plus: rejoice in the Lord always, and again, I say, rejoice!

Duration: 01:07:09


1 and 2 Clement

7/30/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss apostolic succession, deposed presbyters, what a sermon really is, and everything else in the apocryphal books of 1 and 2 Clement. Plus: it’s literally impossible to follow Jesus, and listener mail!

Duration: 00:57:35


Ephesians

7/16/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss holy armor, salty babies, “mutual submission,” and everything else in the epistle to the Ephesians. Plus: a new segment called Pop Theology, and a quiz about famous Pauls. The music in this episode is the album Moon and Sun by Ellisa Sun, which Niko plays bass on! More details here: http://www.ellisasun.com/music

Duration: 01:12:54


Acts of Paul and Theclas

7/9/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss sexual sublimation, milk necks, wild beasts, and everything else in the apocryphal Acts of Paul and Thecla, which the church doesn’t want you to read! Plus: women be baptizing, and seals!

Duration: 01:08:21


Galatians

7/2/2017
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Lauren and Niko discuss barely literate scribes, psychosexual nightmares, WWPD, and everything else in Paul’s Epistle to the Galatians. Plus: Wow. What a surprise. Circumcision.

Duration: 00:55:16


Infancy Gospel of Thomas

6/25/2017
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Niko and Lauren discuss Jesus’s first murder, whether Jesus can really read, The Twilight Zone, and everything else in the apocryphal Infancy Gospel of Thomas. Plus: our secret heist, and Joseph’s not my real dad!

Duration: 00:55:43

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