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Park Bench Ontology

Comedy

is a low-stakes existential crisis disguised as a comedy podcast for people quietly losing faith in the script of modern life. Each week, comedian and writer Gavin Stephens dissects the absurd machinery of capitalism and culture — from sitcoms to wealth inequality, Baudrillard to people who talk in the movies — exposing the broken myths, invisible rules, and slow-motion collapse we all pretend isn’t happening. Presented by The Chonilla Network. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Location:

Canada

Genres:

Comedy

Description:

is a low-stakes existential crisis disguised as a comedy podcast for people quietly losing faith in the script of modern life. Each week, comedian and writer Gavin Stephens dissects the absurd machinery of capitalism and culture — from sitcoms to wealth inequality, Baudrillard to people who talk in the movies — exposing the broken myths, invisible rules, and slow-motion collapse we all pretend isn’t happening. Presented by The Chonilla Network. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Language:

English


Episodes
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“Elbows Up, Davos, and The Shock Doctrine

2/16/2026
This week, we examine the “Elbows Up” movement and Mark Carney’s Davos speech through the framework of Naomi Klein’s The Shock Doctrine. When crisis rhetoric meets elite policy, what changes — and what stays the same? A philosophical and political breakdown of neoliberal continuity disguised as renewal. 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Mark Carney, Davos speech, World Economic Forum, neoliberal reform, disaster capitalism, Canadian political movements, economic crisis narrative 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:39:03

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Why Does Society Feel Like an Art Gallery?

2/8/2026
What actually gives people power today?🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Episode 5 of Park Bench Ontology explores sign value and social capital—the invisible currencies that organize modern society. This episode looks at how meaning, status, and recognition now shape outcomes more than material reality, and why so much of life feels like performance rather than substance. 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:22:49

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The Real Housewives of the Overlook Hotel

2/2/2026
What happens when reality TV becomes a haunted house? This episode looks at The Shining and The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City as the same structure repeating itself: endless luxury, frozen time, and personalities trapped inside a building that remembers everything. Using Mark Fisher’s hauntology, this episode explores how reality TV functions as a cultural ghost — a looped performance of wealth, identity, and breakdown that can never resolve, only repeat. Not horror. Not satire. A system that won’t stop replaying itself. 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:17:15

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State & Revolution at the Dinner Table | Park Bench Ontology S2E3

1/26/2026
Arguments about communism, socialism, and capitalism rarely fail because people disagree. They fail because nobody is using the same definitions. This episode looks at how political language turns into dinner-table theater — where words stand in for understanding, and certainty replaces curiosity. Not a lesson. Not a debate. An observation from the bench.🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:18:00

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EPISODE 2 - Enframing & Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

1/19/2026
Episode 2 of Park Bench Ontology looks at enframing — the idea that modern systems don’t just control what we do, but how the world shows up to us in the first place. Using Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, we trace how empathy, humanity, and morality become measurable outputs inside a technological worldview — and what happens when people start treating themselves like machines. This isn’t about robots. It’s about work, burnout, identity, and why being human now feels like a performance metric. When everything becomes a resource — attention, emotion, relationships — the question isn’t “Are we free?” It’s “Free to do what?” Park Bench Ontology is a lo-fi philosophy series about ideology, culture, capitalism, and existential drift. New episodes weekly. 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:18:36

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Burnout Is a Feature, Not a Bug

1/12/2026
Burnout isn’t an accident. In this episode, I sit on a park bench and talk about why stillness feels suspicious, why boredom is treated like a problem, and how a society built on constant stimulation quietly teaches people to fear being alone with their thoughts. This isn’t motivation. This isn’t productivity advice. It’s a look at what happens when rest, solitude, and reflection are treated as failures instead of necessities. Park Bench Ontology is a podcast about identity, systems, and the strange things we’ve been taught to accept as normal. 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:12:20

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Simulation / Spectacle: The Real Satanic Panic

11/10/2025
They told us fantasy games were dangerous, but reality was the real cult. In Episode 8, Gavin looks at how the Satanic Panic became a rehearsal for today’s culture wars — a simulation of evil that kept us from noticing the system running the show. Featuring dark humor, theory, and a touch of absurdism, this episode dives into the spectacle of fear, nostalgia, and control that defines our era. Park Bench Ontology — “Simulation / Spectacle: The Real Satanic Panic.” 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:06:53

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Necropolitics: Living Isn’t the Point Anymore

11/3/2025
This week, Gavin looks at necropolitics — the philosophy of who gets to live, who’s left to die, and how power hides behind empathy. From Charlie Kirk’s empathy shaming to the way immigrants, women, and Black people are turned into election-season mascots, Park Bench Ontology cuts through the moral theater of politics with dark humor and existential clarity. 💀 Necropolitics: Living Isn’t the Point Anymore — a comedy of collapse for anyone trying to stay human under capitalism. #PhilosophyPodcast #ComedyPodcast #Necropolitics #BlackAbsurdism #PoliticalPhilosophy #ExistentialComedy #LoFiPhilosophy #CriticalTheory #MarkFisher #PoliticalSatire 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎧 Podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized 📷 Instagram: @countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: gavinstephens.substack.com 🎵 TikTok: @ParkBenchOntology 📼 YouTube: http://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology Also, Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:12:17

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Necropolitics: Living’s Not the Point Anymore

10/27/2025
What if life under capitalism isn’t about living — but managing death? In this episode of Park Bench Ontology, Gavin dives into necropolitics, the philosophy of who gets to live, who gets to die, and who just gets to survive. From truckers blocking crosswalks to how society normalizes sacrifice, this episode looks at how power decides whose existence counts. 💀 Necropolitics: Living’s Not the Point Anymore 🎙 Park Bench Ontology — existential comedy for the end of the world. 🔗 Watch full episodes & support: 🌐 Website: https://gavinstephens.ca 📼 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@parkbenchontology 🎵 TikTok: @parkbenchontology 📷 Instagram:@countgavin 🐦 Bluesky/Twitter: @gavinbstephens.substack.com 🎧 Listen to the podcast: https://pod.link/uncolonized Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:17:54

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Psychopolitics: How Control Got Cute

10/20/2025
In this episode of Park Bench Ontology, Gavin dives into the strange world of psychopolitics — where control doesn’t come from force anymore, it comes from vibes. From influencer culture to “mental health awareness” campaigns, the systems of power learned how to smile while keeping you compliant. Why are we all marketing ourselves while pretending it’s freedom? How did surveillance turn into self-expression? And why does every form of rebellion now come with a brand kit? This episode explores how capitalism evolved past discipline into dopamine — how control got cute, and why that’s the scariest form of power yet. 🎧 Listen if you’ve ever felt like even your thoughts are trying to sell you something. #Psychopolitics #ParkBenchOntology #CapitalistRealism #ByungChulHan #SurveillanceCulture #DigitalControl #AfroAbsurdism #ComedyPodcast #ExistentialComedy #CriticalTheory #MediaTheory #LoFiOntology #PhilosophyPodcast #CulturalCritique Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:15:16

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Hauntology - The Future Isn't Coming

10/13/2025
The future isn’t coming — it’s being rewritten. In Episode 4 of Park Bench Ontology: Hauntology, I explore how capitalism erases anything that doesn’t produce value, from WWE’s most absurd gimmicks to the mistakes that make life human. We also unpack how older generations insist theirs was the “best era,” when really culture just keeps repeating itself — sanitized, packaged, and sold back to us. Listen & Subscribe: https://pod.link/uncolonized Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ParkBenchOntology Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:16:25

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Capitalist Realism & My Old Navy Malcolm X Shirt

10/6/2025
In this week’s episode of Park Bench Ontology, we dive headfirst into capitalist realism—the idea that capitalism is the only system that feels “real” and inevitable—and what it means when our identities, style, and culture are co-opted by the market. I share my own bizarre experience buying an Old Navy Malcolm X shirt, and why it made me rethink how we consume revolutionary imagery while participating in the very system it critiqued. We talk symbolic violence, brand culture, and the absurdity of resistance in a consumerist world—and I unpack how capitalism doesn’t just sell products, it sells identity. 🔑 Topics covered: If you’ve ever wondered why your rebellion looks suspiciously like a mall display, this episode is for you. Listen & Subscribe: https://pod.link/uncolonized Watch the full episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOStPFwaNyn895S43bUk9HoaZdFEIXlQc Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:20:12

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Racecraft: The Making of Whiteness

9/29/2025
Some guy once told me he was proud to be white. But “whiteness” was never a culture — it was manufactured as a team sport by the people in power. In this episode of Park Bench Ontology, I break down how the invention of whiteness became a tool of control, division, and identity politics that still shapes our world. This is existential comedy for the collapse: part history, part philosophy, part absurd truth-telling. 🎧 Listen, share, and subscribe to Park Bench Ontology for more deep dives into identity, culture, and capitalism. Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:19:09

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The Sopranos & The Denial of Death

9/22/2025
Tony Soprano’s panic attacks aren’t just mob stress — they’re existential dread. In this episode of Park Bench Ontology, we dive into Ernest Becker’s The Denial of Death and how it explains Tony’s breakdowns, projection, and the absurd ways people cope with mortality. 🔗 Follow & Support: 🌐 Website: http://gavinstephens.ca 🎙️ Podcast: https://podbio.me/parkbenchontology 📷 Instagram: countgavin 🐦 Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/gavinbstephens.substack.com 📼 YouTube: https://youtube.com/parkbenchontology #sopranos, #sopranos #existentialism #analysis, #denialofdeath, #ernestbecker, #philosophy, #podcast, #park, #bench, #ontology, #mortality, #psychology, #popculture, #philosophy, #lo-fi philosophy, #comedy #podcast, #death #anxiety, #comedypodcast Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:16:48

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Welcome to the Collapse

8/18/2025
Uncolonized is Evolving… New Season. New Ontology. From Uncolonized → Park Bench Ontology For years, Uncolonized has been our space to challenge culture, identity, and power. That work isn’t ending — it’s mutating. We’re evolving into Park Bench Ontology: a lo-fi philosophy podcast about collapse, comedy, and the strange theatre of being human. Think zine-brained philosophy meets Adult Swim absurdity — sitting on the park bench, staring at capitalism’s weird machinery, and laughing so we don’t scream. The first episode drops 22/09/25. It’s called Everyday Gltich and it dives into “The cognitive dissonance of everyday” or “the algorithms of dread”. Same feed. New lens. If Uncolonized was about breaking the empire’s script, Park Bench Ontology is about what comes after the script falls apart. Stick around. Things are about to get weird. Visit our website: gavinstephens.ca Check out the Substack: Dispatch From The Simulation Follow us on instagram: @countgavin Follow us on BlueSky: GavinBStephens Subscribe and leave a review! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:00:38

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Episode 25: Narratives, Existential Dread & The Spook Who Sat by the Door

5/26/2025
Uncolonized host Gavin unpacks the weaponization of narratives, existential dread in capitalist culture, and the revolutionary symbolism of The Spook Who Sat by the Door. Listen now + bonus episode on Patreon. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:32:27

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S16E25: Sinners & Andor – A Deep Dive into Discourse

5/19/2025
This week on the Uncolonized Podcast, Gavin and Daniel tackle the cinematic and cultural complexities of the film Sinners and the hit series Andor. Join us as we explore the narratives, themes, and the surrounding discourse that movies like these always seem to attract. In our bonus Patreon episode, we dive into the bizarre incident involving a woman who used a racial slur against a five-year-old and the concept of "vice signalling." http://pateron.com/theuncolonized Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:38:21

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S16E24: Election Aftermath Instagram Live/ with Derek Forgie

5/12/2025
In this week's episode of Uncolonized, we dive deep into the recent Canadian federal election outcomes with special guest Derek Forgie from @Partiesoverproject. Join us as we discuss the implications of the election results, the shifting political landscape, and what it means for Canadians moving forward. This insightful conversation, recorded live on Instagram, offers a fresh perspective on the political climate in Canada. Tune in to gain valuable insights and engage with our community! Check out bonus episodes on our Patreon http://pateron.com/theuncolonized Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:54:05

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S16E23: Polling Stations, Power Trips & the Myth of Democracy

5/5/2025
In this solo episode, Gavin unpacks his firsthand experience working at a Canadian federal election polling station—and why it left him more convinced than ever that capitalism and democracy are fundamentally incompatible. From authoritarian micro-behaviors to racial dynamics at play, this episode dives deep into the cracks in the illusion of “free and fair” elections. In the bonus episode on Patreon, Gavin discusses the 2022 film Sinners, exploring themes of guilt, power, and collective moral failure. 👉 Support us and hear the bonus ep: patreon.com/theuncolonized 🎧 Available now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you listen. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:32:49

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Episode 16: Museums, Deportations, and Colonial Déjà Vu

4/28/2025
This week on Uncolonized, Daniel and Gavin tear into the Royal Ontario Museum, where one of the board’s chairpersons is connected to a company making money off deportations from the U.S. Spoiler: colonial institutions don’t really change — they just rebrand. We also get into Martin Heidegger’s idea of enframing, and how museums, despite all their shiny updates, are still running on the same colonial operating system. On our Patreon bonus episode patreon.com/theuncolonzed, we break down how the Peterborough mayor thought it was a good idea to use the N-word at a college event — and how boomers are still fumbling around the internet like it's a damn Rubik's Cube. If you want critical, unapologetic takes on colonialism, racism, and the slow-moving trainwreck of old power structures trying to survive the internet age — hit play. Want the real unfiltered shit? Subscribe to our Patreon for bonus episodes that pull no punches: patreon.com/theuncolonzed" Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:00:45:58