Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

One of the ideas that really makes my clients bristle is the possibility that their self-sabotaging behaviors are guided by their system's well-meaning intention to keep them safe. They question, "How is it possible that my subconscious mind thinks it is trying to keep me safe when all it is doing is making my life harder?" That is a great question because it feels counterintuitive that our desire to be safe is actually holding back our progress. This week in the podcast, we explore why the subconscious mind gets in the way in trying to keep us safe AND the first step to overcoming this common issue. I believe that this is one of the most important concepts in all of tapping and if you aren't doing it, you are slowing your progress and also limiting your tapping results. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support [player] Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

For some issues, tracking progress is simple. I can tell if my desk is less cluttered, if I can lift more weight while working out, or if I am making more sales in my business. That is because these examples are measured in hard metrics, or in other words, cold, hard numbers. Changes that are measured in soft metrics are more difficult to track. For example, it is much harder to quantify growth in my self-esteem or confidence. Much of the transformation we are trying to achieve with tapping is measured in soft metrics. Because it is hard to measure, it can escape our notice and therefore is more likely to be missed. And that results in us thinking that change isn't happening at all, because we don't see it. This can undermine our healing and can demotivate us from tapping more. In this week's podcast, we explore three simple ways we can more accurately track soft metrics and recognize our progress. In turn, this leads to more tapping, which (most importantly) results in more healing and transformation. This understanding changed the way I tapped forever because it means I am tapping more, leading to more transformation. I believe these three measures are something every tapper should have in their transformational tool box. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

One of our biggest struggles in creating transformation and change in our lives is those moments where we know WHAT to do, we know HOW to do it, and we know WHY it is valuable to take an action…and yet we just don't. It is obvious what the next step is and for some reason we don't take it. Then, as a bonus, we beat ourselves up for not taking action. So as well as not moving forward, we feel bad for letting ourselves down. This week in the podcast we explore where this resistance comes from, how to overcome it and (just as importantly) we will tap for all the emotions that come up when we let ourselves down. If you are trying to create change in your life, then you must listen to this episode. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

One of Marianne Williamson's most cited quotes starts "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." It is quoted so often because of how deeply it resonates, speaking directly to the contradiction that is part of our lived human experience. On one hand we want to live an authentic and rich life…on the other hand, our subconscious mind just wants us to be safe. This desire to be safe keeps us small because if we are small, then we aren't seen, and if we aren't seen, then we are safe. This week in the podcast, we explore the three biggest subconscious fears that keep us small and we do lots of tapping to clear those resistances. Description Libsyn & Wordpress Body: Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Letting ourselves down is one of the deepest betrayals that we humans can experience. It feels like such a harsh gut punch when it is something we know we should have been able to do. After we let ourselves down in such a powerful way, our subconscious will do everything in its power, through resistance to take action so as to keep us safe. It reasons that since it was so painful to let ourselves down, the way to avoid that pain in the future is simply not to commit to something better. Intellectually we know this is a bad plan, but the resistance will persist, trying (and often succeeding) to hold us back. This week in the podcast we look at why we created this resistance, how to overcome it in the moment, and how to avoid it in the future. If you are serious about healing and transformation, clearing the resistance to making commitments to yourself is essential. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

The words change and improve are very close in meaning. While both are associated with transformation, they do not mean exactly the same thing. Improvement is about keeping something but doing it in a better way; change is about doing something in a new way. In the transformational arena we long for change, but in doing this we sometimes diminish the value of improvement. This week in the podcast, I explore the difference between these two ideas, when we should seek to improve or to change, and how best to bring these goals to our tapping practice. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

Not all stress is created equal. There are those hyper stressful times, like driving on icy roads in a snowstorm at rush hour. It is super intense in the moment and then when it ends, it is over! Then there is the low-grade stress of something that is taking a long time and is hanging over your head. The example I think of from my own life is doing my business taxes. I'm not especially good at doing my taxes because I only look at the task once a year; it is also a big deal and if I make a mistake, there can be major consequences. This is a stress that is ever-present and feels oppressive, but is not all-consuming. It also doesn't last forever because at some point my taxes will be filed and I will be able to move on…until the next year! Finally, there is the type of stress that never seems to end. When thinking about this type of stress, I think about a postal worker sorting mail. No matter how hard they work, there will always be more mail coming down the conveyor belt for them to sort. There is the pressure of needing to get their task done quickly, because more mail is coming, AND there is the stress of there being no end in sight. Of the three types of stress listed above, the third is by far the hardest to tap for. This week in the podcast, I share with you how I tap for issues (not just stress) that will always be there. It works for stress, feeling overwhelmed, and persistent physical issues, to name just a few common issues. Because straightforward tapping doesn't work well for this type of stress, we are unlikely to tap for these issues because it feels fruitless. The simple process I share in this week's podcast is one you must know. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

One of the most consistent struggles my clients have is coming up with the "right" words. The problem is there is no such thing as the right words when it comes to tapping. Instead there are useful words and unuseful words. I am consistently surprised at some of the types of words that end up being useful. One such type of surprising words is when we are tapping on phrases that we intellectually know not to be true. When I ask my clients to tap on phrases that they know aren't true this is natural resistance. One on level it doesn't feel logical and on another there can be the fear that we are tapping in something bad or untrue. This week in the podcast I explore the power of tapping on phrases that we know intellectually are untrue and how to get the most out of doing exactly that. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Grief is unlike all other emotions when it comes to tapping. Every other negative emotion is something we can step out of. I can stop feeling angry, frustrated, or overwhelmed. Grief on the other hand is something that we are going to feel forever. Twenty years after a loved one has died we are still going to feel pangs of grief. Instead of leaving grief, we have an evolving relationship to it and how we live with it. Because this is the case it requires a different approach when we are tapping. This week in the podcast I explore the unique nature of grief and how you can use tapping to heal our relationship to it. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

We often refer to tapping for stress and feeling overwhelmed as emotional first aid. That is because we are applying a tool for quick relief in the moment in the same way we would use first aid for a physical injury. But there is one key difference between first aid and emotional first aid. When we are physically injured, our first thought is "I need to take care of this right now!" When we need emotional first aid, we are so caught up in our emotions that we don't realize we need to do something about what we are feeling. Listen to this week's podcast to learn how to use tapping as an emotional first aid tool and how to ensure you reach for tapping in the moments you most need it. Because it doesn't do you any good to know how to tap for stress, but don't actually do it! Following these simple steps will ensure you tap more and short circuit stress and overwhelm promptly. Description Libsyn & Wordpress Body: Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

A number of years ago I was visiting my friend "Mike" and his family. Mike asked his youngest son, who was about five at the time, to tidy his room before dinner. His son replied, in the most overwrought and dramatic voice possible, "But whyyyyyyyyyyyy? I am just going to make it messy again!" I can relate! There are SO MANY tasks on my to-do list that I dislike doing and there are even some that I despise. In this week's podcast, I share some simple ways you can clear your resistance to doing the tasks you despise. I can't promise that tapping will make those tasks enjoyable, but you will get more done and you won't have those dreaded tasks hanging over you any longer. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

There is a huge difference between bouncing back from being tired and being exhausted. When we are tired, we simply need to refill our tank. When we are exhausted, we first have to recover from being exhausted before we can even consider refilling our tank. In this week's podcast, I share seven simple ways you can help yourself when you are feeling exhausted or emotionally drained. And the great thing about these seven ideas is that you don't have to do them all in order to bounce back. Instead, you can pick and choose the two or three that work best for you. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

One of the hardest parts of being a caring person is witnessing others in pain. When we see someone struggling, it feels natural to want to step in and help. With that being said, there is a fine line between being helpful and taking responsibility for someone else's suffering. This becomes doubly hard where emotional burdens are concerned. While we might be able to assist with practical struggles, we can't pick up someone else's emotional struggle. In this week's podcast I explore: If you care deeply about others but often find yourself overwhelmed by their emotions, this episode is for you. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

There is this moment in every tapper's life when we move from "This tapping thing is amazing" to "Oh my goodness there are soooooo many issues for me to tap on. Every time I clear one issue I find four more!" It's easy to feel frustrated and demotivated when this happens. You might even stop tapping altogether because it feels like the tapping is creating more problems than it is solving (when we know it is really just uncovering what is already there). This week in the podcast, I share with you what I do when I feel overwhelmed with all the work I need to do and the fact that there seem to be so many emotions. By tapping in this way we can move from feeling overwhelmed by our emotions, to recognizing it is just one more step on our healing journey. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Over the years, so many of my clients and students have told me that two of the biggest obstacles preventing them from sitting down to tap are having too many issues so that they don't know where to start, and the fear that their emotions will be too big to handle when tapping. It makes total sense that these obstacles make it hard for us to tap because they are both rooted in our subconscious mind's wish to keep us safe. When it comes to having too many issues, the subconscious mind is worried about us wasting time. It is concerned that we are going to pick the wrong issues or an issue that will not make a big difference. Even though we tap, we aren't doing it in the most useful way. So, in order not to waste our time, we get around to tapping at all. Where being overwhelmed with emotions is concerned, the subconscious is just trying to keep us safe. It knows how deeply we can feel emotions and it doesn't want to feel the pain of being SUPER emotional. This week in the podcast, I share a simple way for you to overcome both of these issues so that you can tap in the most useful way and allow healing and transformation to happen. The process is called the Container Process. Listen to the podcast to learn the process, when it is best used, and follow along with my demonstration. You don't even have to memorise the process, just follow along and tap as I do all the heavy lifting. This is a process every tapper should know. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

Even though we might not be conscious of it, every time we sit down to tap, our desire is for total, instantaneous, eternal transformation. While our desire makes a lot of sense, there are two obstacles in our way. First, we don't always have access to total, instantaneous, eternal transformation. For better or worse, sometimes transformation just takes time. Second, swift transformation isn't always the safest way for us to move forward. This week in the podcast, we explore our relationship (and frustration) with how long it can take to heal, how we can be sure we are SAFELY getting the most out of each round of tapping, all the while not being too discouraged by the pace of change. Once I understood and embraced these ideas, it actually improved the quality and speed of my transformation. I found that slowing down allowed me to heal more quickly, which has also informed the work I do with my clients and students. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Sometimes tapping feels nothing short of magical! We are struggling with an issue or an emotion and then, after a few rounds of tapping, we feel so much better. This transformation can feel profound to the extent that the world actually looks different. (That is not an exaggeration. My clients often report how the world literally looks brighter and more welcoming after tapping.) Then there are those issues where despite putting in the time to tap, nothing changes. We try different approaches. We make lists of every possible tail-ender and aspect. But no matter what we try, we just can't seem to make any progress. Not only does the tapping feel like a waste of time, we start to lose faith in tapping altogether. In this week's podcast, I share with you what to do when it feels like your transformation has plateaued and your tapping is not working. Being stuck like this is more common than you might think. Join me for straightforward tools and approaches that will help you to start moving forward again. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

One of the fundamentals I repeatedly return to when I am working with clients or teaching practitioners is: We emotionally respond to the world in the way that we describe it. That is to say, the words we use when talking about our lives impact how we feel about our lives or a particular situation. Recently, I have started adding the word "feel" when I describe what I am thinking, feeling or experiencing at any given moment. This has created a powerful shift in how I perceive situations AND it has made it easier to create change and transformation in my life. This week in the podcast, I share with you how I have started using this simple word in my daily life, the tangible positive change it has created, and how you can do the same thing. It is easy to dismiss or overlook this idea, but I encourage you not to miss out on a powerful tool. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

For the longest time, I found tapping for feeling overwhelmed one of my most frustrating issues. The reason it was so frustrating is because no matter how many times I tapped for overwhelm, it always came back. Sometimes it came back multiple times in the same day. When we aren't making the progress we want, it is easy to get frustrated with the fact that "I have to tap for overwhelm again!" We not only lose faith in tapping for that particular issue, we may also find our faith in tapping overall is eroded. This frustration went away for me once I realized there are some issues, like overwhelm, that will not be resolved forever. Instead, these issues require a certain approach. Making this discovery moved me from being discouraged to excited about tapping for feeling overwhelmed. This week in the podcast I explain why issues like overwhelm are different AND the best way to tap for them. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube Watch a video version on YouTube

One of the most commonly used tools in transformation and healing is affirmations. When I did a quick internet search on the "history of affirmation," the first article I clicked on started with the line, "The first recorded use of affirmations dates back to the ancient Egyptian civilization. Affirmations were inscribed on amulets and other objects." BUT affirmations don't just work. For an affirmation to create change, it needs to be a useful affirmation. Notice that I didn't say the "right" affirmation. That's because one affirmation might be useful today but not tomorrow. In this week's podcast I explore how to gauge whether an affirmation will be useful for you AND how to use tapping to supercharge the power of the affirmation. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube