Things That Go Bump In The Night04/19/15
I was having a wonderful erotic dream last night, when something went BUMP! I leaped out of bed, throwing my back out of whack, bit my upper lip so I wouldn't yell something the Lord wouldn't want to hear, hit my head on Mr. Floor which made my world...
No Dogs Allowed
As I have mentioned, I am not in the dog house with my Lady Wonder Wench. I am, instead, sitting here in my big, comfortable, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room. I am not in the dog house, because we don't have a dog. And at the...
Two Stories And A Fantasy
Follow your dreams...that's what all the great thinkers tell us. And I think you should follow your dreams, except for that one where you're naked at work. If you don't follow your dreams you'll spend your life sitting in some corner gathering dust...
I am an attention sponge. We all want a little attention. Some achtung! There are three little words that'll get a lot of guys attention... "My husband's home." That'll do it every time. There are four little words that will also get a guy's...
According to Big Louie his own bad self, one sure way to tell if you're in a real family restaurant is check the conversations that are going on. If there's a lot of screaming going on at all the tables you're in a family restaurant. But there's some...
I told you...let some Louie Louie into your life, and your life will have more life. I'm sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable black leather poppa chair in my living room trying to keep from doing a one man wave. A Harvard professor by the name...
Guys Don't Over Think
Like a lot of Louie-Louie Generation guys, sometimes I just don't think things through. That's why we need the guidance in my book Staying Happy Healthy And Hot, from Big Louie his own bad self the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie Generation....
Meet Meat Reality
I don't have a smartphone. My Lady Wonder Wench and I have the last dumb phones in our zip code. All they do is make phone calls. I like the fact that other people's smart phones can't text me, because I like sitting here in my big, comfortable,...
Making Something Wonderful (For Valentine's Day)
I like ladies. I have always liked ladies. When I was a kid, and the other guys were throwing snowballs at the girls, I always threw snowballs at the guys who were throwing the snowballs at the girls. As I said, I have always liked ladies. So does my...
I am sitting here in my big, comfortable, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room, thawing out from the trip I just took to the mailbox. It's cold. No I mean COLD. That's because it's February. And as I told you in my book, Staying Happy...
Looks like Louie has done it again. I'm sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room, and I just got a note from Big Louie. He said I should tell you to "If things are tough, let a smile be your umbrella,...
I am convinced that somewhere near here there is a dedicated group of women who call themselves the Fed Up Females Federation of America. And I am sure that it is that group which is responsible for the doll by the name of Mr. Wonderful. Mr. Wonderful...
Prepared To Take Chances
There are those who would say that I am sitting here in my big, comfortable, manly, black leather poppa chair doing nothing. Ha. I am constantly doing the very stressful thing that is the obligation of all real men. As I have explained in my book,...
I Love A Parade
Life is a parade, not a stage show. I've been sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room watching the parade for quite a while. As a matter of fact, I still get up and do a little marching in the parade...
I am sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room, after having a born again experience earlier today. I remember when I was born the first time, it was such a surprise that my parents said I didn't talk for...
I am sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room, and I'm about to tell you about three little words that just came in over my phone that has made me wax philosophical. As I told you in my book, Staying...
The True Meaning Of Halloween
I think I have discovered the true meaning of Halloween. Halloween features a squadron of little kids with hobgoblin masks, ghostly sheets, and little princess costumes coming to your front door, and threatening you with a trick if you don't drop some...
I was happily chomping away on my ham and Swiss on whole wheat with a slice of raw onion and mayo, when all of a sudden, I realized I had the sandwich in my left hand. I am a very right handed guy. I have often been glad that I am a very right handed...
The R Word Again
I'm sitting here in my big, comfortable, black leather pappa chair in my living room, in total shock. My Lady Wonder Wench just said the R word to me again. I think I'd better stand up for a moment, just to prove I still can. There. That's better. I...
The Lady By The Window
My Lady Wonder Wench and I were at the diner today, and as usual we were kidding around with our waitress...I refuse to say waitperson. There is no gender confusion going on here, Stacey is definitely a pretty young woman. As I have explained in my...
- Lowell, MA
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