
Planet Maynard
Comedy
Maynard from Australia. Take a journey through pop culture with no clear purpose or destination. Always shameless.
Location:
Australia
Genres:
Comedy
Description:
Maynard from Australia. Take a journey through pop culture with no clear purpose or destination. Always shameless.
Twitter:
@Maynardcomau
Language:
English
Website:
http://www.maynard.com.au/
Email:
maynard@maynard.com.au
Episodes
Gene Pitney 2003
4/1/2026
Gene Pitney toured Australia in October 2003. It was his last time in Australia as he died while on tour in the UK in 2006. I caught up with him at the beginning of that 2003 tour in Sydney. He told me the stories behind some of his iconic songs, from 1961’s Town Without Pity to his collaboration with Marc Almond in 1989, Something’s Got A Hold Of My Heart.
Maynard: Gene Pitney, welcome once again to Australia.
Gene: Thank you very much, Maynard.
Maynard: How many times all up now?
Gene: A hundred.
Maynard: A hundred times. It feels like that, hey?
Gene: I don’t really know, but I think at least a dozen times since the early sixties.
Maynard: Do you remember the first tour? Was it very strange to be so far away?
Gene: The very first tour was with a bunch of Brits, I think it was when the, uh, so-called British Invasion happened, and it was Dusty Springfield, Gerry and the Pacemakers, Brian Poole and the Tremolos and me.
Maynard: Who was your major competition when you were first starting out? Who was the person you really had to worry about?
Gene: I never, ever thought of it in that direction at all. I just loved what I was doing, loved having the opportunity of being out there, and there wasn’t an awful lot of that around at that time. I think there was a great camaraderie in the sixties. People would join in and if somebody was doing a session, they would say, if you’re a town or something and you run into ’em, they’d say, come on, stop by and see what’s going on. There was no really great competition. The competition was the audience going out and seeing how good a show you could do.
Maynard: One of the strangest connections I’ve found with you is you’ve got a Rolling Stones connection.
Gene: Well, it was political to begin with. My publicist in the UK, Andrew Loog Oldham, was the Rolling Stonesí first manager. As a result, we got to know each other. I had never ever seen a guy with long hair like that before. Nothing like they are now. When they first started out, they had really, really long past the shoulders type hair, you know? And I remember I had a guy traveling with me from home in Connecticut, and he took a picture. That was when Brian Jones was still alive and in the group. When he got home, he showed it to his wife and she said, who are those four ugly broads? They were not pretty with the long hair, I’ll tell you, at the time.
Maynard: You ended up doing a bit of work with them and, and swapping songs?
Gene: Yeah. Well, we, we didn’t do any tours together, but we, did a lot of television together and a lot of promotion when they were out with their first recordings. They had a song that they had actually recorded with a guy named George Bean. They didn’t like the way it came out and they played it for me and I loved the track. I loved the orchestration on it. So I said to them, look, if you let me rewrite the melody to it so it fits what I’m doing, and having the success with, I’d love to take a crack at doing a vocal on it. So we went back in the same recording studio, Olympia Studios in London. I did the vocal with the harmonies on it, and it came out excellent. So I sent it back to New York first and they put it out to go on the US charts. At the time I was new to the business, the Rolling Stones were brand new to the business and hadn’t had that much success. It was just another thing that we were doing.
Maynard: How do you find the business part of the music business?
Gene: Unfortunately, it’s gotten way over that side of it now. When I first started, it was the music side. There were a lot of companies that were run by eccentrics that made it really interesting. People like George Goldner, I remember in New York, and Hy Weiss, people that ran a lot of the small independent labels. They were really characters. George Goldner was always with his big giant cigar. I’ll give you an instance: the guy that brought me to New York the first time brought me into George Goldner’s office to see if...
Duration:00:22:43
Elvira’s Haunted Hills
3/19/2026
Elvira, Mistress of the Dark shot her spooky movie in Eastern Europe in 2001 with her then partner Mark Pierson (they divorced in 2003) and was more than happy to tell me ALL about it. (the movie, not the divorce)
Maynard: Cassandra Peterson. Why has it taken so long for a second movie? Is there an easy answer for that?
Elvira: I’ve been out there selling movies ever since my first one came out. First, the studio went bankrupt, then I wrote another one, sold it again. Then the studio executive changed and he put the kibosh on that project.
Elvira: Finally, my only answer was to make it myself or I just never get another movie out.
Maynard: You and Mark are partners.
E: That is correct
M: Must put a lot of strain on any relationship and to have to shoot the movie in Romania. How do you two get on so well?
E: Who said we got on so well? Who are you talking to? It is tough. It is tough to work together and to be married. It’s really difficult and we’ve been doing it for 23 years. I think that’s a world’s record here in Hollywood. Look, I think we should get an Academy Award just for that.
M: You shot the movie in Romania. You used a lot of your own money, I believe. I’ve heard the figure mentioned of 1 million American dollars. Is that about roundabout the budget or is it more than that?
E: Actually under that, to shoot it, by the time we finished it with all the post-production, the music and everything else, it was about a million and a half dollars for the whole thing, which seems like a lot of money to a regular person just slogging away at a job, but for a movie, that’s a spit in the bucket, it is. Absolutely nothing. Compare that to any movie made by a big studio right now, and it’s, that’s what the costs are for the catering.
M: Elva Haunted Hills was made in Romania, and you got Richard O’Brien for it.Richard O’Brien is best known for the Rocky Horror Show and for his work on stage and his musical work. How did you get him?
E: It was just a fluke. I tell you. It was so strange. We actually had signed Richard Chamberlain, which is so strange. Of Thornbirds fame. I’m sure you’ve heard of Dr. Kildare? Richard is a very good friend and I thought he would be fantastic playing the part because I always saw a big similarity, believe it or not, this is a compliment for me to say this. Between him and Vincent Price. They’re both stage actors. They both have this look about them, that they’re Americans, but they seem like they come from England. So we were going ahead with Richard until he actually got a job that paid money. I don’t know why, but he took that one.
M: He ditched you?
E: He did, but in a nice way. We didn’t feel too bad. He actually had a job, like I said, that was going to pay rather better than we were. My brother-in-law, who’s from Romania mentioned that he knew Richard O’Brien. I was like, oh my God, that is so perfect. And we called Richard and he said, I’d love to do it. And that was that.
M: I couldn’t believe that you actually had all these fantastic sets built. You had all these amazing things built that just did not seem within your budget at all.
E: That’s Romania for you, and that’s why we had to go there to do this. We could have never built these sets. We really wanted the very same look that all the old Roger Corman and Hammer films had. We even took pictures to these set designers in Romania of what those particular sets look like, and My God, they did such an incredible job. We were just blown away. We had no idea that they were going to do that amazing of a job for the money we were paying them.
M: Films like The Pit and the Pendulum.
Elvira: Another one was Haunted Palace and the House of Usher. The movie was set in the 1800s.
M: But you didn’t have to dress any of the locals any differently, did you?
E: No, we didn’t even have to dress any of the locals. They came as they were. People are always saying, oh my God, where’d you get these?
Fabulous costumes and the peasants...
Duration:00:08:45
What were The Porkers drinking in 2008?
2/18/2026
Pete Porker drops by in 2008 to fill us in on all things Porker.
The Porkers are the mightiest ska band to hail from Newcastle and then end up playing US and Japan. They were never meant to be taken lightly. Despite the title of their videography “Persistence Is Futile”.
What is their history? What are their dreams and ambitions?
Learn none of that. But maybe enjoy your time with Pete Porker himself as he spills the pork beans on the state of The Porkers in 2008.
Also hear 3 tracks from their 2007 release This Is The Porkers.
All you ever need to know about The Porkers official website
Maynard: Not very often in the history of broadcasting do you meet? An epic legend the size of the guy I’m about to speak to now. Pete Porker, 1500 years, when first Settlers landed here, he was on the shore playing ska, weren’t you, Pete? Hello? Yes. It’s the a, the, the voice of wisdom here. How long have the porkers been together as a Newcastle institution ska?
Pete Porker: Yeah, as of this November, it is 20 years since we played our first gig. And what was that first gig? That first gig was a house party in Bar Beach. Uh, a few friends of mine had a, uh, a share house that was, uh, marked for demolition and we played the, uh, the house wrecking party.
Maynard: And did it go well? Did you go, Hey, this is what I wanna do for 20 years?
Pete Porker: I dunno whether it was, whether I said that at the time, but it went so well. It was like everyone was saying, you’ve gotta play again, you’ve gotta play again, and the house got suitably wrecked.
Maynard: So ska has always been your thing. And look to the uninitiated. Ska could easily be explained as very fast reggae, but that’s not correct.
Pete Porker: Not exactly. Actually the father of reggae. So it came before reggae, but that is a good way to explain it. And that’s probably how I’ve explained it to a lot of people over the years. It’s if you take a, for example, if you take a bit of reggae. A bit of early r and b, a bit of rock and roll, add some brass to it, like early rock and roll had, and you’ve got ska, but the way the porkers have played it, it’s always been a quite bastardized version it’s always well as it should be because you aren’t Jamaican guys in Jamaica. You’re doing your own Newcastle version. Yeah, man, look, when I first encountered you guys, I loved you guys. I’ve played lots of gig with you guys. There’s much history. Look, a lot of, people ask me about the band.
Maynard: What was it? What was the story with Pork Man? Pork Man was part of the band for a while. A mystery Mexican wrestler looking kind of guy who was Pork Man in relation to the Porkers. What was Pork Man or, or, or what was he in relation to the Porkers? That’s a great question. We’re still asking ourselves.
Pete Porker: He was he was on board for a while as our mascot, as our mc, and many other dancing guy Mc guys in other ska bands like say chess smash from madness. He wouldn’t get off after the introduction and stayed on stage. Danced around and,
Pete Porker: caused mayhem and became an entity in himself.
Pete Porker: And he was a hard drinker. He was a hard drinker, and he was a hard drinker and a soft man and that just run into troubles. And I I still remember I’ve got a bit of video of us playing in New York City. He was our last show and on our America tour and Pork Man was there, pork Man was there.
Pete Porker: And I said, a big round of applause for Pork Man who was standing on stage with his pants off. I said. He’s wanted in 20 states and we’ve only been to six. He faded out a little bit. His last official shows were with us in the year 2000, but he started just not turning up to shows.
Pete Porker: And so I can’t actually recall what his last one was. And he didn’t quite go out with a bang, but we did bring him back I think it was about 2003, 2004 for one weekend only in Sydney. And he caused a bit of mayhem then. And, then disappeared into folklore once again. But it’s a, and...
Duration:00:29:15
The Spotfull James Valentine. Free of domestic guilt.
2/11/2026
In 2007 James Valentine revealed to me why he is free of domestic guilt.
His book Spotfull was out, as a reaction to people who spend their entire weekend cleaning their white goods.
This is from the Maynard International Studios 2007 archive in the hope that James may persuade you to have a bath instead of cleaning it.
James Valentine official website
Maynard: James, what is Spot Full all about? I think from my perspective, I find it dull on the radio, but you are a recovering cleaning addict. What’s the story?
James Valentine: It’s true. Look it, it’s Spotfull is the book I’ve written as a response to the Spotless phenomenon and I’ve had to do,
Maynard: and that’s just insane. There’s too many fuss budgets out there with time on the hands.
James Valentine: Exactly. And I had to do this because, I am responsible for Spotless. I introduced Shannon Lush and the whole bicarbonate and soda and vinegar cleaning phenomenon to Australia, and I apologize for it. I’m sorry. I dunno what, I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t know the genie. I was letting outta the bottle when that happened. Turn the nation into a group of people obsessed with cleaning, with getting rid of all spots and stains. And I just thought, I don’t think people really live like that. I think people live like pigs. Spotfull encourages you to live free of domestic guilt, to embrace your inner a slob and just lie back and relax.
Maynard: Yes. So I’m a single guy living on my own.
James Valentine: Oh, you are one. You. Prime Spotfull candidate.
Maynard: See, I don’t clean till I say it’s time to clean or my parents or a date is coming over.
James Valentine: Yeah, I would suggest the true Spotfull approach would be that the date never comes over. What are motels for?
Maynard: Exactly.
James Valentine: And it’s cheaper. It’s cheaper. You would be better off hiring a nice room in a hotel than you would be trying to clean up your pad, I would imagine, mate.
Maynard: And you can get away with free drinks there if you do it properly.
James Valentine: I advocate it’s cheaper to stay in five star hotels than renovate.
No one should ever bother to renovate a home. You should simply move out and live in five star luxury.
Maynard: I read that chapter because apparently the renovation cost can change. Where the cost of checking into a five star hotel doesn’t,
James Valentine: it doesn’t. You know what you’re in for. If you decide to renovate your falling down home the quote will be 100,000. You’ll end up paying 200,000. When you go to check into a hotel, they say, thank you very much. It’s 200 a night and it stays 200 a night. So you know what you’re in for and it’s much better. And if you renovate a home, you turn it into a home that has to be cleaned.
Maynard: James, one thing that you get to in your book is that there’s a few letters from people there, and one of the letters I quite enjoyed that there’s, there are some people who make a large part of their weekend, they plan to do things on their weekend that I would consider unusual, for example, planning to clean your freezer.
James Valentine: Yeah. I just find that astonishing, that somebody would think is I’m wanting to clean my freezer and I’d like some hints about how to do that. And my suggestion is join a tennis club. Perhaps go bush walking. Have you ever been to an art gallery? Do anything but clean your freezer.
Freezers can just sit there, can’t they? I wouldn’t clean the freezer if I was trying to sell the fridge. You just take it outside, it melts, it disappears. And that’s about it. Isn’t it. It would never occur to me to clean a freezer.
Maynard: Naturally I have the whole thing of cleaning the freezer because I move about every 2 years.
So the freezer cleans itself during the moving process?
James Valentine: Exactly. In the days leading up to that move, you probably don’t need to shop either, because there’d be all sorts of frozen sausages that are suddenly emerging from the...
Duration:00:06:41
A Very Maynard Xmas 2025 – audio version
12/9/2025
The audio from A Very Maynard Xmas 2025 for those that find all of my suits are a bit hard on your eyes..
A Very Maynard Xmas 2025 brings you the unexpected festive farce that you’ve come to expect from someone who has inflatable legs for a window.Low budget has been swapped out for no budget this year as a Xanadu-themed Xmas special brings you the talents of Leslie Fountain (Glenn Keenan), Fat Elvis (Chris Kelly, Ship-o’-Fools) and Olivia Cardboard-John on the Maynard International Studios Mainstage, as well as greetings from around the world and around Tony Push (whose new teeth are a feature this year), plus more impractical outfits and the wonders of Magpie TV.
Watch A Very Maynard Xmas 2024
Video – A Very Maynard Xmas 2025
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Duration:01:06:58
Brigitte Handley CyberNation
5/20/2025
Brigitte Handley has a new release out, as well an EP of vinyl featuring unreleased Dark Shadows live tracks. In between all her German shenanigans she’s been recording again and pondering the evil sound that is autotune. Time to talk about that ominous looking splatter vinyl pressing, the implications of releasing music on cassette tape...
The post Brigitte Handley CyberNation appeared first on Planet Maynard.
Duration:00:13:19
Tim Ferguson told you so!
5/13/2025
We catch up with the legend Tim Ferguson. Unsurprisingly he has a lot to say in just 12 minutes. Hear his predictive powers for the last 9 Federal elections, why improvisational comedy has to go and the importance of an Australian pope. Tim is running his monthly stand up comedy night at The Harold Park...
The post Tim Ferguson told you so! appeared first on Planet Maynard.
Duration:00:12:40
Australia’s Coldest 100 – 2025
1/23/2025
Australia’s Coldest 100 returns for 2025 this Saturday 25th January with @ozkitsch presenting 100 tunes you won’t find easily anywhere on any continent. Just look at this list of artists that Andrew Sholl has curated that you’ll never again see in the same room. This is Andrew’s eighth Coldest 100 and he doesn’t see Farnham...
The post Australia’s Coldest 100 – 2025 appeared first on Planet Maynard.
Duration:00:20:08
Happy 50th Birthday Triple J !
1/22/2025
Triple J staff celebrated 50 years of Triple J on Sunday 19th January. Even the ABC itself did the same thing later that day. Hear from Rusty Nails, Dr Karl, Sarah Macdonald, Craig Donarski, Andy Marinos, Dame Lush, Hannah Thompson and other ex ABC staff and current Triple J listeners. The expectant crowd at ABC...
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Duration:00:23:50
A Very Maynard Xmas 2024 Audio version
12/9/2024
The audio from A Very Maynard Xmas 2024 for those that find all those colours hurt their eyes. Broadcasting from the main arena at Maynard International Studios, just opposite the Gilmore Girls Memorial Auditorium, it will bring the magic of Santa’s grotto back into our lives. Hopefully in the good way. Feature guests in A...
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Duration:00:58:25
George Hrab is a dancin’ fool.
7/23/2024
In the Thermopylae of modern life, occasionally you encounter someone who is beyond a journeyman, way past a Renaissance man. In fact, George Hrab has gone straight through the Renaissance, leapt over the Napoleonic Wars, and now has his head currently right up the Jazz Age. I first met and listened to George Hrab in...
The post George Hrab is a dancin’ fool. appeared first on Planet Maynard.
Duration:00:48:23
Australia’s Coldest 100 – 2024
1/26/2024
Australia’s Coldest 100 returns for 2024 this Saturday 27th January with @ozkitsch presenting 100 tunes you won’t find easily anywhere on any continent. Just look at this list of artists that Andrew Sholl has curated that you’ll never again see on the same list. This is Andrew’s eighth Coldest 100 and he doesn’t see Farnham...
The post Australia’s Coldest 100 – 2024 appeared first on Planet Maynard.
Duration:00:14:19
A Very Maynard Xmas 2023 audio podcast version
12/7/2023
Here’s the audio version of the Xmas show this year. To enjoy the full immersive cheapo experience, watch the show on the previous page. But enjoy both, it’s Shatmas. A Very Maynard Xmas is the highlight of the year for people who don’t get out a lot. It’s just like an old style Xmas variety...
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Duration:00:56:15
Sunday Afternoon Fever 17.10.1993 – Kirk Pengilly
10/19/2023
30 years ago this week, on a Sunday far, far away Sunday Afternoon Fever blasted across the 1993 landscape of Australia on Triple J… Kirk Pengilly, world famous saxophonist from INXS was my special guest taking questions from live callers Molly, Lance, Rick, Damien, Jenny, Claire (Darwin), Fran (Syd), Melissa (Melb), David, Liz (Melb), Craig,...
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Duration:03:30:18
Bunga Bunga 74- Tim Ferguson & Maynard
8/24/2023
Bunga Bunga 74 answers the eternal question “what is art?” with Tim Ferguson and Maynard. “It’s on the wall you goose”, is the only answer you need. “Art is problematic Maynard. Let’s face it. It doesn’t fucking go with anything.” Wendy Harmer Tim Ferguson has been making art, while Maynard has become a librarian. We...
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Duration:00:35:59
Sunday Afternoon Fever 11.7.1993 – Live from a toilet in Ultimo
7/25/2023
30 years to the month after the original broadcast, here’s Sunday Afternoon Fever, Maynard’s Triple J show from a public toilet in Ultimo for no apparent reason with The Andy 500, Rob Clarkson, and Melissa Tkautz. Even Simon Day sticks his head in. There’s live music in front of a live studio audience. We even...
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Duration:02:36:08
Sunday Afternoon Fever 4.7.1993 – Kate Ceberano
7/2/2023
30 years to the day after the original broadcast, here’s Sunday Afternoon Fever, Maynard’s Triple J show for no apparent reason with Kate Ceberano, Anthony Morgan, Lance & The Hollywood Kids, Crappy New Releases, Warren Coleman, Richard Kingsmill’s Hot Tip and Getting Your Goat. Kate Ceberano calls us from her Melbourne sauna to let us...
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Duration:03:02:41
Sunday Afternoon Fever 16.6.1993 – Sultans of Ping
6/13/2023
30 years to the day after the original broadcast, here’s Sunday Afternoon Fever, Maynard’s Triple J show in all its unlikely glory with Tlot Tlot, Mrs Sinatra, Sultans of Ping FC and Anthony Ackroyd. Set your dial for plenty of 1993 goodness. “When radio shows were properly and lovingly put together and interviews were entertaining.”...
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Duration:02:42:16
Brigitte Handley in Köln
4/13/2023
Brigitte Handley of The Dark Shadows has returned to Australia to let Maynard know what he is missing on German television. Also to remind all of us of the educational value of the work of Falco (even though he was Austrian). She’s been exploring a new range of sounds there and has been working with...
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Duration:00:19:46
Bunga Bunga 73- Tim Ferguson & Maynard
3/9/2023
Bunga Bunga 73 has you wading fearlessly into the intellectual end of the inflatable kiddie pool with Tim Ferguson and Maynard. You will soon learn your lesson in ethics as topics impetuously covered in this show include comedy, Gumby, cheese, poo and Peter Dutton. Tim is writing a book, quelling a riot and giving advice...
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Duration:00:21:15