Death, Sex & Money

In a new, very special Death, Sex & Money and Slate Money crossover, Felix Salmon and Anna Sale dig into the difficult decision of whether or not to have kids. Child care? School? New vehicle? All the baby gadgets? Kids are expensive! Anna has two kids, and Felix is famously childless. Between the two of them they dig into their decisions to have and not have kids, the budgeting and balancing of all the emotional and financial costs of kids, how kids can be a benefit later in life, and more. For a visual experience, you can watch this episode on YouTube. Podcast production by Cheyna Roth. Video production by Micah Phillips. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the early-morning hours of October 2, 2023, progressive activist and organizer Ryan Carson was stabbed and killed by a stranger on a Brooklyn sidewalk. His girlfriend Claudia Morales—who witnessed the crime, attempted CPR, and dialed 911—quickly became the target of sensationalist online posting. Internet trolls falsely claimed that she didn’t cooperate with law enforcement and suggested that she and Ryan were, first and foremost, anti-police activists. This week, Claudia talks to Anna about what it’s like to become a flattened character in the online culture wars, and she explains what the online provocateurs get wrong about who she is and who Ryan was. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Christine Brown Woolley grew up in Utah with a dad and two moms, in a polygamist community called the Apostolic United Brethren. When she became an adult, she joined a polygamist marriage as a third wife, helped raise more than a dozen kids, and became co-star of the TLC reality show Sister Wives. Fast forward to 2025, and she has left her marriage and her polygamist faith. This week, she talks to Anna about the pros and cons of her former lifestyle, how being on a reality show helped her family to confront and process conflicts, and why she’s so happy being re-married and monogamous. Her new memoir is Sister Wife: A Memoir of Faith, Family, and Finding Freedom. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at ⁠www.monarchmoney.com/DSM⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the new movie Sovereign, actor Nick Offerman plays an extremist who doesn’t believe in the legitimacy of the Federal government. In real life, Nick comes from a small-town political family. His father is the mayor of Minooka, Illinois, and his uncle is on the village board. In this episode Nick talks about choosing roles, how he’s different from his family, his love of teaching woodworking and the profound influence of poet Wendell Berry. Listen to our 2018 interview: Nick Offerman Can Take Directions Podcast production by Andrew Dunn Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Peter van Agtmael went to Iraq in 2006 to embed with the U.S. military, he was 24 years old and confident that his pictures could help end an unjust war. Two decades later, after documenting combat deaths overseas and then turning his camera lens on America, he's learned the limits of what photography can do. In this episode, Peter talks about the emotional toll of bearing witness to violence, the fraught ethics of choosing a subject, and how he ended up in a legal battle with Ye over an image. Peter’s book is called “Look at the U.S.A.: A Diary of War and Home,“ and he has a show at the Corcoran School of the Arts and Design until January 25th. You can see his 2015 KKK wedding photo here. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, Anna learns about how frustrating it is to apply for jobs these days, especially for early-career folks, even those with college degrees. First, Jeopardy champion Brendan Liaw talks about what it was like to list his job as “stay-at-home son” on national television. Then Slate writer Nitish Pahwa explains why talented people like Brendan are having such a hard time securing work. And finally, Anna discusses the growing prevalence of layoffs with Melanie Ehrenkranz, who writes a newsletter appropriately called Laid Off. Mentioned in the episode: “Why Are There No F-ing Jobs?” -Nitish Pahwa Is A.I. Taking Your Job? -What Next TBD This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Over the past few months, we've been asking you to tell us stories about your beauty interventions. You told us about feeling caught between viewing appearance improvements as vanity and recognizing how much looking a certain way affects your relationships, career, and self-worth. In this episode, Anna talks to listeners about their appearance choices: Asher, who spent $43,000 on plastic surgery and openly celebrates his investments; Caroline, who used fillers and Botox after her divorce but recently filed for bankruptcy and can no longer afford treatments; Alexandra, who stopped dyeing her gray hair at 38 despite pushback from family; and Nick, whose multiple cosmetic surgeries nearly ended his marriage and forced him to confront deeper issues. Read Nick Dothée’s essay: What Plastic Surgery Couldn’t Fix Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at ⁠www.monarchmoney.com/DSM⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Megan Greenwell was 34 she landed a coveted job in journalism as the editor-in-chief of the sports and culture blog, Deadspin. Just over a year later a post about why she was resigning went viral – a private equity firm had bought Deadspin’s parent company, and was seeking "a quick cash-out rather than the growth that comes from a well-run business." Her experience led her to spend six years investigating the industry for her book Bad Company: Private Equity and the Death of the American Dream which follows four Americans whose lives were upended by private equity takeovers in retail, healthcare, housing, and media. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After two decades of making movies with his younger brother Mark, Jay Duplass has gone solo. This week, he tells Anna about all the factors that led to that decision: tricky union rules, his brother’s career taking off without him, and the need to provide for his family. They also talk about the resulting film, a tender and unique indie rom-com called The Baltimorons, which Jay co-wrote with the talented but little-known comedian Michael Strassner, who stars in the film with Liz Larsen. Hear Jay’s younger brother Mark on the show from June 2024: Mark Duplass on Making Money, Mental Health, and Midlife. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When comedy writer Tamara Yajia talks about her childhood, she’s sometimes unsure what tone to strike. Her new memoir Cry for Me Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star depicts a very fun nuclear family with parents and grandparents who are loud, crass, and sex-positive. There are hilarious moments and situations that seem wildly inappropriate. In this week’s episode, Tamara tells Anna about the ups and downs of her childhood, which was spent in both Argentina and the U.S., and what she wishes her parents had done differently. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. To check out the episodes about Hurricane Katrina that Anna mentioned, click here: https://www.wnyc.org/story/in-new-orleans/ Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

They say moving is one of life’s most stressful events. We asked for your stories about why you’re doing it. Plus, Heidi Reinberg was priced out of a Brooklyn neighborhood she loved. Where did she end up? Death, Sex & Money is produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus. Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. __ Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at www.monarchmoney.com/DSM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Casey Johnston grew up in a family where being thin mattered. In college, the internet told her to eat 1,200 calories and do endless cardio if she wanted to lose weight. That habit followed her into her late twenties, until she came upon a Reddit post about weightlifting that changed her relationship to her body and just about everything else. Casey Johnston is the author of Physical Education: How I Escaped Diet Culture and Gained the Power of Lifting, and she writes the substack, She’s a Beast. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Adonis Williams has been a mover in New York City for 20 years. He says he's moved about 3,500 people, and with each move, he catches a glimpse of a life in transition. There are the happy moves: getting a bigger place, couples moving in together, kids going off to college. There are also the sad moves: divorce, breakups, eviction. Adonis says he talks with his customers about it all. "You become the bartender or the taxi driver that they need to vent to." In this episode, Adonis explains why he didn't charge money for the first five years of being a mover and what he's observed on the job about relationships, family, and the cost of living in New York. You can hear more Adonis in this episode, where he talked with one of his moving clients, and you can reach Adonis for a move on his website. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Evan Osnos has spent nearly his whole life observing the habits, values, and norms of the wealthy elite, from his childhood in suburban Connecticut to the years he spent reporting on the mega-yachts and underground bunkers of the U.S.’s richest citizens. This week, he talks to Anna about his new book The Haves and Have-Yachts: Dispatches on the Ultrarich, and they get specific about what the most powerful people in the world value and what keeps them up at night. Evan is a staff writer at The New Yorker and is a co-host of The New Yorker’s podcast The Political Scene. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

N.D. Austin is not an event planner. He designs experiences, which he says are supposed to leave you feeling transformed. He’s designed hundreds over the years, from secret sewer speakeasies to coming-of-age rituals on deserted islands, to funeral board games that guide people through decades of memories. In this episode, Anna talks to skateboarding legend Tony Hawk about an experience N.D. designed for Tony’s office that mended friendships on a homemade train. And N.D. tells Anna how growing up in a doomsday cult in Alaska sparked his obsession with performance, ritual and generosity. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay. Thank you also to Jeremy S. Bloom and Stefan Zeniuk. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Actor-writer-director Seth Rogen discusses Hollywood's perpetual existential crisis, where art and commerce constantly battle for dominance. On the heels of the Emmy nominated Apple TV+ series The Studio, Rogen talks about finding humor in the industry's dysfunction, and how his lifelong friendships shaped him as an artist. This interview comes from the podcast Talk Easy hosted by Sam Fragoso. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Brendan Paul co-owns the Graceland Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas, which claims to be the site of the world's first Elvis-themed wedding. Dressed in sparkly jumpsuits, Brendan marries sometimes as many as 75 people a day—in back to back 15-minute appointments. But while his portrayal of Elvis is generally a jovialone, his view on The King's life isn't entirely one of reverence. "That loneliness, that despair, that unsatisfied inside," he told me about Elvis near the end of his life. "A lot people go, 'I bet you wish you were Elvis,' and I always go, 'Not really.'" This episode originally aired in 2022 in collaboration with Condé Nast Traveler and their new love and travel series. Read more about Brendan and find other essays about love and travel here. You can hear our 2022 listener style episode about weddings and budgets here— Bells and Bills: The Price You Paid For Your Wedding Death, Sex & Money is produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Silvia Camila Muñoz and Bradley Bartell had been married for less than a year when ICE stopped them at the airport on the way back from their honeymoon in Puerto Rico. Silvia Camila came to the United States in 2019 to work at a Wisconsin waterpark for one season. The pandemic caused her to overstay her visa and continue to work without authorization. That’s when she met Bradley, a local factory worker, and a Trump supporter. In this episode, Anna talks to Bradley and Silvia Camilla about her 49-day stay in immigration detention, how it changed their relationship and friendships within their community. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ray Christian joined the U.S. Army in 1978, as a way to get his life started. He became a paratrooper, an infantryman, and a drill sergeant. He also endured trauma and found that getting out of the service was more challenging than he expected. This week, Ray discusses why he signed up in the first place, what it was like serving in-between major conflicts, and how he eventually transitioned into a life of academia and storytelling. To hear more of Ray’s stories, check out his appearances on Snap Judgement, The Moth, and Risk!. And make sure to subscribe to What’s Ray Saying? wherever you get your podcasts. This episode was produced by Cameron Drews. Get more Death, Sex & Money with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of DSM and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Death, Sex & Money show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. If you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Alexandra Paul always loved connecting with fans. She had many, from her breakout role in the 1983 horror film Christine to her years playing a lifeguard on Baywatch. In 2011, Paul's career was slowing down, but it was also the year that she met her biggest fan: a woman who would come to stalk her for over a decade, costing Paul tens of thousands of dollars in legal bills, strain on her family, and forcing her to move across state lines. The ordeal is now over, and she has lessons to share. In this episode you’ll hear Alexandra Paul read from an essay she published in The Ankler, a newsletter about the entertainment industry. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices