Reality-Based Leadership

In this intimate conversation, Cy and Charlie Pleasant, LCSW dive into the messy beauty of being human in today’s challenging environments — exploring how we navigate fear, uncertainty, and the complexity of our inner worlds. From the transformative power of anger to the importance of boundaries and truth in relationships, they unpack how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy can be integrated into everyday life. At the heart of it all? A deep call to self-care, love, and community. Every pinpoint is a portal for your own evolution. If you are wondering what the invitation of your current discomfort and stress might be: it is to go inside and emerge evolved by your current situation. Whether you're familiar with IFS or just curious about emotional healing, this episode offers rich insights for anyone seeking grounded, reality-based leadership — both within and without. To benefit from Charlie and her work, check her out on IG @charliethattherapist and charliepleasantlcsw.com Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.

In this week's episode, Cy and Alex were able to take a fan question that was submitted through the website. The question focused on what to do about negativity at work, and in particular this was part of a group that was going through a residency program. And so in this episode, Cy and Alex take a look at the question and go into some of their favorite techniques to reflect on the situation that has become negative. What are some ways that you could reset the negativity and maybe come out at a different angle? What are some tried and true techniques to be able to influence the negativity and hopefully turn it into a better spirit and a better environment of how we could make things better? Lots of good information and techniques in this episode, so if you've ever been on a team or situation where negativity becomes the norm or people get into patterns of negativity, and you're not sure how to stop it or shift that energy, you'll really love this discussion and find some good takeaways from there. Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaways.

This week's episode is all about a common pattern that happens when people are really excited about Reality-Based Leadership, or they just learned some of our new techniques after a session. They accidentally begin weaponizing Reality-Based Leadership, and the ideas. We get it, you're excited about some new approaches and really looking forward to trying to shift a place your team has been stuck, or an individual has been stuck for a long time. What often happens, is people grab the harshest part of the message and use it on the person that's running away from them the fastest, and then the content doesn't work. This is one example of many that are talked about in this week's podcast of where the loving part of Reality-Based Leadership gets weaponized and used for evil. So today's episode, Cy and Alex discuss some of the ways that great techniques that can work most of the time, get used in a way that's harsh and actually backfires for people that are excited about Reality-Based Leadership. This can affect even the most seasoned practitioners of our content and tools, so this is a great reminder. In fact every two years just like what sparked this episode, there's usually an example that comes through that someone grabbed a deeper part of the philosophy and used that first in their very next meeting after a session, and we hear reports that it backfired, then the groups a little bit turned off from RBL. This podcast is designed to help those who may have experienced setbacks, offering a chance to reset, as well as those eager to maintain the momentum they've built with their teams. It's all about preventing the misuse of the tools, practices, and techniques of Reality-Based Leadership, while ensuring we focus on loving people up so we can call people up to greatness.

In this episode, Cy and Alex share some incredible insights from Reality-Based Leadership's Leadership Development Series! While many know them for their engaging keynotes, their deep dive programs are all about transforming teams into modern leaders who can ditch the drama and turn excuses into tangible results. They reveal some impressive data from participants, showcasing significant boosts in career satisfaction and leadership skills. For instance, 50% of respondents reported higher job satisfaction, 94% said they’d stay in their roles post-course, and burnout was reduced by an astounding 50%! On the leadership side, 55% feel more confident coaching others on the spot, while 70% have enhanced their ability to hold teams accountable. Plus, 60% are ready to lead their teams through change with newfound confidence. Remarkably, 80% are excited to drive results without just hoping for the best. And every single participant is now using at least one powerful tool daily to elevate their leadership. Cy and Alex also explain how the program is structured, from interactive sessions to group coaching and ongoing support that truly makes a difference. If your current training isn't delivering the results you’re looking for, this conversation is a must-listen. And if you’re interested in redesigning your curriculum, Ana from our team can work with you to create a tailored approach for your team. Don’t miss out! Email us today at info@cywakeman.com

A leader recently asked Alex and Cy, “What happens when you're trying Reality-Based Leadership or using a tool and everything goes silent? Does that mean that the tools not working? What do I do when there's silence? What do I do when that silence feels like it has some extra tension attached to it, is it working?” All of these questions came up and in this podcast, Cy and Alex explore their own experiences in coaching with running their own business facilitating tools that have led to silence. And what that really means from a Reality-Based Leadership perspective. Many people believe that something is not working when there's silence after introducing a tool technique, coaching question, but we would say that actually means you are just beginning Reality-Based Leadership and getting to the good stuff, cultivating accountability. Self reflection is the foundation of accountability, and self reflection often includes silence. So in this episode, we're going to share with you ways to use silence to better your leadership and prove your use of the tools and most importantly, moving people from why we can't to how we could. And moving people from where they're stuck into where they're hoping to be. You'll love this episode. We had fun doing it and can't wait to hear your feedback on ways you can use these tools in your leadership.

One of the top three biggest questions we get at Reality-Based Leadership is, How do I get my team to buy-in? How do I get them to buy into what needs to be done? How do I get them to buy into strategies? How do we get people to buy into changes the organization needs us to execute on? And the next question after that is, what do I do If I thought I had buy-in, and then it turned out it was fake, or it seems to be where people say they're bought in, but the behaviors are different? So in this podcast, Cy and Alex talk about this pattern, if it's happening and how you might be able to address fake buy in, how you can go after more buy in, and the truth is, buy in is the first step of accountability. It's about commitment. Buy in is a verb and if an individual isn't able to offer up their buy-in, it's really game over when it comes to happiness results in engagement at work. So Cy and Alex do all they can to come up with our best techniques to help you go after buy-in, secure buy-in, but remember you can only work with the willing, you can't buy someone else in, and this podcast will give you some techniques to figure out what's really going on.

Many leaders struggle with giving freedom for their employees to do their best work, because they forget to provide some structure for them to work in. In today's episode, Alex and Cy talk about leader's role in finding the balance between structure and play. In the conversation, they go into a key Reality-Based Leadership focus that all leaders need to have, is setting your nonnegotiable as a leader to then get people to buy into those. From there, people are allowed to bring their best self play in the workplace so to speak and create magic. They also cover why it's so important to focus on this balance because too much structure and people believe we're over proceduralized. And they feel like they can't do any work and too much play, then it's really a free-for-all and innovation can't happen. So the magic comes from just enough structure and then people are allowed to innovate and collaborate knowing they have the same basics, so this is a really, really important episode to setting the groundwork for good leadership and Cy and Alex can't wait to hear your thoughts.

If you're a leader that is currently leading your team through change, transformation, innovation, and noticing that there is a lot of resistance concern or fear, this is the podcast for you. Cy and Alex dive deep into what they call Business Readiness, which is their modern take on traditional change management. In short, change management has been the name of the game in leadership for years and in many ways still is, but Reality-Based Leadership is starting to see that it is not ready for the modern workplace. It is a model that responds to change. It notices change happening and then starts to manage it, where Business Readiness is a forward, thinking, leaning in to ensure that people are ready, willing, and able to deliver on what the business needs. This shift and mindset will help you transform in the way which your team embraces and sees it as an opportunity to capitalize on it, so where change management focuses on change being least disruptive to the people, Business Readiness is a model that helps you ensure that change is least disruptive to your customers, your patients, and your organization. Cy and Alex go back-and-forth on how this connects to resilience and how you can build resilience in your people and readiness in your systems in your organization. And this sweet spot is how to disruption-proof your workplace and ensure that it can handle whatever change comes its way. You don't want to miss any word in this podcast, so be sure to tune in.

In this podcast, Cy and Alex discuss an important leadership concept they discovered while working on content for Alex's new book. Traditional leadership advice often focuses on identifying the source of drama or conflict, and then applying a single tool to address it. However, Cy and Alex have found that the reality is often more complex - sometimes a sequence of tools is needed to help someone work through a barrier or frustration they're facing. The framework they'll be covering is called the "Greatness Framework", and it involves three key steps: 1) Cleaning up - reflecting on the unpreferred reality or problem at hand, 2) Thinking - finding your space for impact, and 3) Taking the next right action. The key insight is that you can't just talk someone through this process - it requires a more iterative, self-reflective approach using reality-based leadership tools. Cy and Alex believe this framework provides a practical way to apply the various leadership concepts they teach, in a structured sequence that helps people move towards "greatness." Tune in to learn more about this powerful new framework and how it can elevate your leadership abilities.

In this episode, Cy and Alex talk about activating the silent majority at work. Alex and Cy share how they are noticing a trend where leaders are getting a wrong read of the room, and they think they have more resistance than is actually there on their team. Too often the loudest small minority of those focused on why we can't or why we shouldn't have to, get to dominate the entire conversation in a meeting, and the rest stays silent and doesn't jump in to add their input or perspective. There are so many challenges in this that affects our teams, and leaders have many levers that they can pull in these situations that can be more helpful. In this episode, Alex and Cy share several techniques and ways that you can turn down the volume of those loud minority resistors, and turn up the volume of your silent majority that has a lot to say, but they are not participating. In this episode, you'll learn about a powerful, practical tool called negative brainstorming, and how it activates the silent majority to improve dialogue and discussion in meetings and gives better feedback and data to those that might be in the loud minority. Also, you'll learn that in this can be some compassion for those that are the loud resistors and why that's important. We also talk about that the dog bites and what that means we also talk about how sometimes these tools fall flat, but they are still successful, and we discuss why. And lastly, we talk about the importance of taking verbal dialogue of that loud minority that's in resistance and moving it towards visual tools to bring in your silent majority. This episode is action packed, and it really can change everything about your team if you're struggling without changing anything. This is an effortless way to evolve your leadership, and we can't wait to hear what you think about this episode.

In today's episode, Alex and Cy talk about a pattern they're seeing out there that is really hurting leaders, creating conflict and burning them out. It's that they are over managing and under leading, and this is a sign of leaders being a little under-skilled to handle some challenges in their current reality. In that, Cy and Alex, talk about a simple, but very powerful concept to support leaders and making sure they're not over managing and under leading called goals, roles, and procedures. And a big breakthrough for all listeners, is that as a leader, if you're clear on goals, clear on roles, then brace yourself you don't have to get so involved in procedures and execution, and in the weeds and jumping into fix and firefighting, so this is a really important concept to decrease conflict on your team, increase clarity and also empower everyone to fully step into their roles, even in times of change. So Cy and Alex dive deep into how leaders can figure out are they part of the what, as far as strategy or what we're trying to do and or whether they're supposed to be into the how in the execution to deliver on that what. Cy and Alex discuss many ways that leaders are consistently getting into control and doing too much, and then they're leaving their teams believing they're the victims and this is how they can rise up evolve and really call their teams to greatness. This episode packs a punch and will give you tons of clarity to improve your leadership of your team for the rest of the year Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.

Alex and Cy connected with Mike Lee to talk about the new rules of the future of leadership. Although these rules are simple rules that you might already know, the key insight is that for years, they have been nice to have, and now they're really the new rules to lead the up-and-coming workforce. In the podcast, they cover some of the solid fundamentals of leadership, how keeping it simple as a leader is the most impactful. Going through what's called mental rehearsal to be a more prepared leader, the power of visualization, how modern leaders are legacy driven instead of outcome driven. And also some great ways to support people by loving them up and calling them up to greatness with some of Mike's best techniques. This is an action packed episode with an individual who's worked with some of the top, high-performing people in the world. Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.

Cy and Alex got looking ahead at their schedules and couldn't believe we're already a month away from National Nurse's day, National Nurse's week, National Hospital week, and they had healthcare on their mind for this week's podcast. They wanted to talk about some of the trends they're seeing in healthcare and with the healthcare professionals they're working with in their sessions and in their coaching and wanted to share some ideas and tips on getting back to the basics, getting back to helping hope make a comeback and talking about ways that energy management can help us do the great work that we signed up to do in healthcare. They hope this is a podcast that inspires a bit of hope, talks a bit about how Reality-Based Leadership might be the support that your teams are craving and why we'd love to be there in your system whether it's virtually or in person in the next month or so for the celebrations, so let's celebrate on this podcast, any healthcare professionals you have in your life and Cy and Alex share opportunities to hear some Reality-Based Leadership content soon to honor those amazing healthcare professionals. In this podcast, they talk about getting back to the basics, why Reality-Based Leadership actually drives engagement and hope, and decreases burnout. Cy shares several stories, in which even in challenging circumstances with some tools of Reality-Based Leadership, people can get back to believing it's possible, believing it's doable, and Alex jumps in as well to share several stories of how teams are able to turn towards each other and succeed, in spite of challenging circumstances if they have some of the basics of RBL, and we're able to get them these tools. So this is a fun episode and pass it on to any healthcare professionals that you know and let them know that RBL is here to help them. Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.

One of the core philosophies of living Reality-Based Leadership at work is to stop judging, start helping. People love this as a way to get started and dive right in, but sometimes their helping becomes doing everyone else's work, or jumping in to fix a lot of things. This creates the risk of becoming an over-functioner or an enabler in your workplace. So many people that just start reality-based leadership say that I started to say how can I help and next thing you know I was busier than ever and couldn't get my work done. This is another step in the evolution of being a reality-based leader is how to jump in to help without taking on everyone else's work. In this episode, Cy and Alex talk about this pattern and how to watch for it and how to see when you're helping is actually hurting and how to begin saying yes and separating out how the work gets done to be able to keep momentum going and agree to goals but also keep your boundaries. With these boundaries, you're able to then take on the short term issues that need to be taken care of where you do jump in and fix, but then you can leave some space to have others help you with midterm issues and then long-term issues in the workplace. Truly a powerful episode to make sure that one of the best tools of reality-based leadership doesn't get weaponized and used for evil. Enjoy, share with your colleagues and make sure you subscribe to the podcast and have discussions on this topic. We can't wait to hear from you.

Ever thought that doing Reality-Based Leadership might take the humanness out of work? What Alex and Cy cover in this session is that RBL actually brings the true humanness back to work. We don't try to bring our whole self to work but instead, we invite you to bring your most evolved self to work. This means that we're not trying to take the humanness out of work we're trying to limit the effect of the human condition on us doing our best work, or at least the lack of the human condition that leads to drama. So in this episode, Alex and Cy dive deep into how to bring your most evolved self to work. We discuss a great story about what happens when the judgments are reduced, and how humans create things in the world with less judgment. Also, we give you practical tips to ensure that people are finally able to bring their most authentic, evolved self to the workplace to do their best work in a highly engaged way. We can't wait to hear your feedback from this episode and make sure to subscribe and share with others to have a conversation about bringing the humanness back to work through Reality-Based Leadership.

Join Cy and Alex on this episode as they're diving into the latest trends for 2024, inspired by the fun ideas they've seen on TikTok and social media. Listen along as they explore leadership and work trends that are in and out for the year. With minimal preparation, they're taking a fresh look at what's shaping the future of work. First, they're talking about the importance of clarity in leadership. Forget the fancy tools and strategies—what's in is getting back to basics. They're discussing re-clarifying goals, roles, and procedures with your team. It may not sound glamorous, but it's essential for ensuring everyone is aligned and working towards the right objectives. On the flip side, what's out is leaders over-managing people and imposing their opinions. Instead, it's all about shared accountability. Leaders and teams alike need to take ownership of their actions and decisions, especially as we navigate new ways of working, whether in the office or remotely. Join them as they discuss these trends and more, sharing insights and practical tips for thriving in the ever-evolving workplace in 2024. To get the top 5 practical tools to lead your teams in the 2024 workplace grab Cy's Reality-Based Cheat Sheet PDF at the link below: https://info.realitybasedleadership.com/cheatsheet

Join Cy and Alex in this thought-provoking episode where they answer the challenging question of what to do with a 'toxic genius' or a high-perfomer that happens to be high-drama? Inspired by an episode that Alex heard in which Brene Brown, Simon Sinek and Adam Grant brought up the concept and the challenge in handling these scenarios, Cy and Alex discuss the impact of this type of employee on the workplace and how leaders can navigate the situation. Cy and Alex dive deep into research from Reality-Based Leadership's 2nd book (Reality-Based Rules of the Workplace) and the Employee Value Equation that was able to get scientific and specific of the cost of drama. This equation gives you a self-assessment that can be used to start the conversation on reducing drama and doing better math on the value a high-performer that is costing a lot in emotional expensiveness to a team and organization. This is one of the hardest leadership situations to approach and the tips and tools in this episode give you tons of direction in doing better math around the value each person on your team is adding to the work at hand. Cy and Alex also touch on how this equation changes the conversation around quietly quitting and discuss the importance of not simply measuring performance, but also change readiness and emotional expensiveness of each person on a team. Truly a fascinating conversation. We can't wait to hear your biggest takeaways! Ready to take the Employee Value Equation self-assessment and calculate your drama-level? Don't be scared! This is the starting point to bringing your most evolved self to work. info.realitybasedleadership.com/equation

Join Cy and Alex on this episode as they chat through the times someones shares, "But, we don't really have drama here." This is often where the loud drama (venting, complaining, gossip around the water cooler) isn't a big issue, but silent drama is out to play. Curious about the difference? You're not going to want to miss this episode. Just a hint, silent drama often shows up as subtle lack of alignment to the strategies your organization is laying out or chronic resistance to change. These tougher to recognize workplace drama culprits really slow a team down and cause work to be more challenging than ever. Download the Thinking Inside-The-Box tool: https://info.realitybasedleadership.com/box To learn more or to book Cy or Alex to speak at your next event or training be sure to visit Reality-Based Leadership or fill out this form to connect with the team!

Join Cy and Alex as they have a fascinating conversation with Stephen Shedletzky (Shed) on how to Create a Speak Up Culture. Listen along as they dive into this topic and what it looks like when leaders in the workplace manage and nurture a safe space to empower others to speak up. You can find more on Shed by visiting his website here

Back by popular demand, Cy and Alex sit down to talk about the latest topics in leadership as they are out speaking on the circuit with the top leaders across the globe. The hottest topic that is coming up is all around trust and how it fits with leading in a Reality-Based way. How does trust fit in? Can you use the tools and principles you are talking about if trust isn't there? Trust is absolutely important on a team and in a leadership moment when you are calling teams to greatness. However, trust can be layered with so many other things as a way for someone to avoid a call to greatness that could help them evolve. Cy and Alex do a deep dive into trust in the workplace, some misconceptions with the topic, how it affects the team, and how trust isn't solely the responsibility of the leader to create. So if you are looking for tips and ideas to: Then this is the podcast for you. Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway. Download the Edit Your Story Tool. Cy Wakeman is the President and Founder of Reality-Based Leadership. Alex Dorr is VP of People Evolution at Reality-Based Leadership and has been standing side-by-side with Cy for almost a decade. Together, they have been helping leaders modernize their approach to leadership and to ditch the drama in the workplace. To learn more or to book Cy or Alex to speak at your next event or training be sure to visit Reality-Based Leadership or fill out this form to connect with the team!