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Fanimorphs: The Dork-Bajir Chronicles

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TV Series: Episode 5 and 6

The month of madness continues as we delve into Episodes 5 and 6 of the Animorphs TV Series: “Between Friends” and “The Message”! Get ready for some more great “morphing” animations and the words “Andalite cousin” being spoken like a hundred times. We are once again joined by goofster Jarred McClure from the 2 Nerds in a Basement podcast! You can find more of his stuff at or on instagram at @vanillajayy.


TV Series: Episodes 3 and 4

We’re back for more! We jump in to Episodes 3 and 4 of the Animorphs TV series: “Underground” and “On the Run”! These are the episodes where the gang infiltrates the cult--I mean totally believable front for the Yeerks--called The Sharing and also the ones where they lose the Andalite’s disc and Marco has to look for it in a Dumpster. Woops! We are once again joined by goofster Jarred McClure from the 2 Nerds in a Basement podcast! You can find more of his stuff at...


TV Series: Episodes 1 and 2

The month of madness has begun! The Dork-Bajir Chronicles digs into the Animorphs television series by discussing the first two episodes titled “My Name is Jake.” For the rest of the month of May, our stalwart literary critics will be reviewing two episodes of the television series every week so strap in! On top of all this, our regular hosts are joined by the one and only Jarred McClure, friend of the show and a confirmed non-reader of the Animorph books. Jarred will help our hosts stay...


Live from the Gardens: The Departure

Strap in for some transformative discussion of the caterpillar and the butterfly, the two main morphs we saw in Animorphs #19: The Departure! What kind of danger do caterpillars pose to humans? What’s the difference between a butterfly and moth chrysalis? How do butterflies taste stuff? Find out the answer to this and many more questions on this metamorphic episode of Live from the Gardens! Hypothetical Question of the Week: If you could pupate and come out the other side as someone...


Animorphs #19: The Departure

Tune in this week as The Dork-Bajir Chronicles covers Animorphs #19: The Decision, the one where Cassie decides to leave the Animorphs and trusts a Yeerk way too much! We dig into the real nitty gritty of the series in what is probably the best Cassie book to date. As she befriends a Controller and even protects her enemy from harm, the Fanimorphs go back and forth over the philosophy of the war and the series itself. Also, don’t worry: there’s plenty of stupid jokes to tide you over the...


Live from the Gardens: In The Time of Dinosaurs

Spearheaded by the all-knowing dinosaur expert Scottie of the Thagomizers Youtube channel, our stalwart heroes dive into a mega-dino quiz this week on Live from the Gardens! Mikael takes a backseat and joins the huddled masses as Scottie quizzes the Fanimorphs and delivers more information than any other episode of Live from the Gardens ever has. Tune in to learn more about Pteranodons and other dinos that are hard to spell! Hypothetical Question fo the Week: Which of the dinosaurs from...


Megamorphs #2: In The Time of Dinosaurs

We dive into another “everyone’s a narrator” book as the gang travels back in time via, you guessed it, a Sario Rip. It’s dinos for days on this very special episode about Megamorphs #2: In the Time of Dinosaurs! We talk about everything from why A Bug’s Life is better than Ants to the stupidity that is the asymmetrical crab people: the Macaroons.


Live from the Gardens: The Decision

This week on Live from the Gardens we’re talkin’ Northern Harrier and Mosquitoes, the two morphs from Animorphs #18: The Decision! Why are harriers “one of the good ones” when it comes to farmers? What DO mosquitoes do with blood after they suck it out of you? What are the Northern Harriers nicknames? Tune in to find out! Hypothetical Question of the Week: If both animals were the stars of a sitcom, what would that sitcom be about?


Animorphs #18: The Decision

The Fanimorphs seep into the mind of a purple alien slash scorpion centaur this week as they talk about Animorphs #18: The Decision! Tessa is off sick so the boys are left to their own devices. Despite the lack of an expert, they manage pretty well as they discuss Tom and Jerry, sci-fi martial arts, Chapman’s road rage, and other cool “no girls allowed” convo topics.


Live from the Gardens: The Underground

We talk bald eagles and mosquitoes on this episode of LIve from the Gardens about the morphs from Animorphs #17: The Underground. How do bald eagles kill geese? How do moles prepare their worms before eating them? What weird things do these animals do when they have more food than they can even eat? All this and more on this episode of Live from the Gardens! Hypothetical Question of the Week: In a room that was 40 sq feet and 10 feet high with no other characteristics, who would win:...


Animorphs #17: The Underground

This week, the good ol’ Fanimorphs talk oatmeal and Yeerk pools as they read through Animorphs #17: The Underground! What’s the deal with Yeerks and breakfast cereal? What’s the deal with Visser Three’s thought-speak? What’s the deal with stigmas surrounding mental health??? Answers to all this and more on this episode of The Dork-Bajir Chronicles!


Live from the Gardens: The Warning

This week on Live from the Gardens, we’re talking houseflies and rhinos, the two main morphs from Animorphs #16: The Warning. What’s the difference between a white rhino and a black rhino? Why are houseflies all different sizes? Why do the Fanimorphs continue to interrupt each other, no matter how many times they make a podcast? Find out the answer to two of these questions by tuning in! Hypothetical Question of the Week: Would you rather be a fly with the skin of a rhino or a rhino with...


Animorphs #16: The Warning

This week the Fanimorphs talk rhinos, rich folks, and mid-nineties internet connections in their discussion of Animorphs #16: The Warning. Do you think Jeff Bezos is richer than Joe Bob Fenestre? Did you know fitey777 has a real website in the real world? Do you think Mikael should have edited out that one part where Tessa blows her nose? Find out this week on The Dork-Bajir Chronicles!


Live from the Gardens: The Escape

This week on Live from the Gardens we talk parrots and hammerhead sharks, the two morphs from Animorphs #15: The Escape! We talk electroreception, parrot marriage, and lots more on this very special episode. What makes it special? Well, there’s been a change to the rules that’ll be sure to keep you on your toes. What change is that, you ask? I’ll never tell! Hypothetical Question of the Week: which animal would you rather be if turning into that animal meant you had to marry the other...


Animorphs #15: The Escape

The Fanimorphs are at it again, this time with another book by our good good comedy boy: Marco! This week, our wonderful hosts discuss Animorphs #15: The Escape, the one where they have to fight off cyborg sharks! Get ready for a full breakdown of what the hell Ax’s tail is made of, Tessa’s newfound vampirism, and, finally, another Visser Three Morph Minute! For those wondering: yes, Tessa is now fully a vampire and can’t walk through the threshold of a home without being invited.


Live from the Gardens: The Unknown

We’re back with more animal trivia and friendly rivalries in this week’s Live from the Gardens as we discuss the osprey and the horse, the two main morphs from Animorphs #14, the book we read last week (the one with the Andalite toilet). If you’re into backwards talons, closing your nostrils on command, and the intricate and ancient details of a horse culture that predates that of humankind, you’re in the right place! We are ready, willing, and neiiiiighble to tickle your funnybone this...


Animorphs #14: The Unknown

This week the Fanimorphs dig their teeth into Animorphs #14: The Unknown, the one where they infiltrate a secret military base and find an Andalite toilet! If you’re in the mood for poop jokes and us talking over each other, you’re in for a treat! We talk morphing betting rings, how Tessa gets offended for horses, and whether or not horses can give themselves abortions. Strap in!


The Hork-Bajir Chronicles

Jump into an alien invasion this week on Fanimorphs: The Dork-Bajir Chronicles when we talk about The Hork-Bajir Chronicles! We talk everything from Visser Three’s relatability to Dak Hamee’s eight-pack abs to Hork-Bajir teeth. Join us for our first pre-Animorphs adventure! We’re also joined this week by our friend Andrew, curator and memelord of Vissermeme fame! You can find more of his stuff on Tumblr at, on Twitter as @visserfuckin3, and on Instagram as @yeerkfilth.


Live from the Gardens: The Change

We’re once again joined by a gaggle of moths for our Live from the Gardens about Animorphs #13: The Change! He brings the smart as we go over some trivia about raccoons and settle in for a pleasant listening experience as the moths read us a story about the rainforest and what it might be like for Hork-Bajir on their planet. Get ready for some deep dives into raccoon facts like why do raccoons wash their food? How can they climb down trees headfirst? Why are they so damn cute? All this...


Animorphs #13: The Change

We’re joined this week by a genuine character: moths! That’s right, a bunch of moths chime in this week for our discussion of Animorphs #13: The Change, the Tobias book where he gets his morphing powers back! We talk about just about everything this episode, from deep-seated gender role metaphors to Hork-Bajir genitalia to all sort of other delicious tidbits. Mikael tries to ship Rachel and Marco again and everyone hates him for it, as usual. You can find the aforementioned moths on...


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