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More Than True

Comedy

David Raffin is a contributor to Funny Times, Rosebud Magazine, and other publications. Nicer than anyone. Ask anybody. Wait. They might be biased.

Location:

United States

Genres:

Comedy

Description:

David Raffin is a contributor to Funny Times, Rosebud Magazine, and other publications. Nicer than anyone. Ask anybody. Wait. They might be biased.

Language:

English


Episodes

Hoofer

6/1/2022
Podcast 14, fancy new microphone, O boy “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album “The Politics of Desire” by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. Winner Winner! by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4630-winner-winner-License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Fuzzball Parade by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/5044-fuzzball-paradeLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Grateful acknowledgment thereof.

Duration:00:02:33

Fresh Laugh Tracks

10/14/2021
This podcast is so important I recorded it on my phone. My apologies to those I have yet to offend. No apologies to those I have re-offended. To those I have pre-arranged a future offense for, I await payment. “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album “The Politics of Desire” by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. Winner Winner! by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4630-winner-winner-License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Fuzzball Parade by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/5044-fuzzball-paradeLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Grateful acknowledgment thereof.

Duration:00:04:05

Haters at the Park

7/8/2021
A podcast with no transcript? Quaint. Quaint. An exploration of the art of juggling oranges in the park for money. Winner Winner! by Kevin MacLeod (Clipped)Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4630-winner-winner-License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album “The Politics of Desire” by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. The Show Must Be Go by Kevin MacLeod (slightly altered for time)Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4509-the-show-must-be-goLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Grateful acknowledgment thereof. These people are beautiful.

Duration:00:04:57

Frank Talk Abounds

6/2/2021
A story of mid childhood. “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album “The Politics of Desire” by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. Winner Winner! by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4630-winner-winner-License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Thinking Music by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4522-thinking-musicLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Grateful acknowledgment thereof.

Duration:00:07:11

AMAZING disappearing episode

4/13/2021
Two nights only ! What a show !

Duration:00:03:10

Tesla’s Wings and fearsome things

3/9/2021
The story of Tesla's Wings, from the book Tragic Stories Disguised as Jokes. *** “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album “The Politics of Desire” by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. Winner Winner! by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4630-winner-winner-License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Aquarium by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/5738-aquariumLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Monkeys Spinning Monkeys by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4071-monkeys-spinning-monkeysLicense: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Grateful acknowledgment thereof.

Duration:00:09:42

Duck Down, Quack Up, peeking duck

3/3/2021
Duck Calls? We have answers. On the record. DUCK DUCK DOWN Two men walk into a bar. It is at this point in the joke a spectator stands UP from the crowd, having seen something and wishing to report, and says : “Why are they men?“ And the Comedian says, “I’m sorry, but this is a sexist joke.” *** Greatest fear: someone will shout "Duck" whilst I'm looking at a duck and I am then hit by a random flying object. Probably a duck in statuette form. A man came into a bar. This is not a dirty joke. It was dark inside because it is a dark joke because the proprietor had failed to pay the bill. Coincidentally, the proprietor was a duck. Funny things happen in jokes, the world over. The bar was called “the duck billed platypus” which was often a point of confusion. "But what’s in a name, anyway?” the proprietor quacked. Just a moniker. Quoth the Raven, “Nevermore!” “No one asked you,” said the duck. Then the raven lobbed a projectile toward the duck. Who failed to duck. And was thusly taken out in an untimely manner. Timing was off. Just enough to cause trouble. The projectile was a cuckoo clock which had stopped. Twice a day corrected. Even though it had stopped it made quite an impact upon the duck, effecting the disposition of the bill. All clocks stop eventually. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day regardless of the impact upon the bill. Sometimes a broken clock takes time. Hospitality isn’t all it’s quacked up to be. Remember TO duck when the time comes because time flies. The duck billed the platypus three dollars and forty-seven cents. "Cents? cents? Don't make no sense," said the irate duck billed platypus, waiving the bill in the air. "You say it ain't fair?" said the duck. "I say it ain't square!" said the platypus. It was quite a confrontation hanging in the air. Now, the duck billed platypus, he was no fool. He had done and gone to finishing school. He knew what was what, and the meaning of is, he was not new to this turnip truck biz. "If you don't like it," said the duck to his prey, "why don't you just up and fly away?" "Mayhaps I will," said the platypus. "Mayhaps I will." Because the duck billed platypus had finally had his fill. Of the duck and his quack, of the thumb and it's tack, and he was not prepared to say when he would be back. "Now see here," said the duck, but the platypus didn't hear, Didn’t hear quack. He had flown to New Zealand, Jack. Every other duck is odd. That’s just ducky. That’s the way a duck operates. The Duck double billed the platypus over a plate of flapjacks. It was a society flap. The stool-pigeons saw to that. But flapjacks are always funnier than pancakes, always. Cue the cards. “After we seize the means of production we'll set all those duck statuettes free. No more to be lined up in neat little rows, no more ducks placed in order wading on duck row. All the duck statuettes fly away home, wherever those good eggs may nest. On the corner of wild and sycamore street, or a mantle if that's what the duck thinks best." I hate when something is described as bigger or smaller than a breadbasket. A basket which carries bread CAN be any size. Council Bluffs, Iowa is home to the "largest breadbasket in the world." Three people died in the weaving. And for what? They have proposed the construction of "the biggest little breadbasket in the world." The very concept boggles the mind. Maximal minimization. Think small is the big picture. For years philosophers have pondered whether a breadbox which is too small to hold bread can, in fact, be considered a breadbox. This is a slice of life. What is the difference between a breadbasket and a breadbox? One of them is used to hold bread and the other is used to trap it. But which is which?

Duration:00:08:47

The Tyrannical Rule of Three Callbacks

2/23/2021
Last Call for the Three Comedians The melancholic comedian considered the puzzle of existence. The listener doesn’t know. The ins and outs. He considered the audience, melancholic, dour, hard to please. Their lack of humor saddened him and effected his presence, a poor reflection upon them. He sought out the advice of his compatriots. His bombardier insisted the answer was to hurl more bombs, from unexpected directions, the unpredictability measured to alter the viewpoint of the audience. In this she was adamant. It was the only way. Confrontational mendacity. Factionalize the audience. Make them fight themselves before you. Because the listeners don’t know. What’s good for them. She had written a book on this subject, of interest to those who rebel. Naturally it bombed in the marketplace. She claimed it had been defused by being watered down by said marketplace; because a product of a marketplace can never overturn the market in which it, itself, is a product which arose from those market forces. But people don’t usually find talk like that funny. That’s the problem, said the bombedier. The body counts. The upbeat comedian commented that the way was to be as middling as possible, to pander to the most genteel sensibilities, feed the crowd hamburger to warm their hearts, to make the audience feel comfortable and part of the majority. To fit in, together. Because the average listener doesn’t know. What they are missing. That is why they are so easily satisfied. The other comedians called him a dirty hack, which, of course, he was. But those people who called him that were themselves guilty of being controversial. And it’s a strange hill to take a stand on because controversies shift underneath you. And you might slip and fall. And people would laugh. *** I believe it was Milton Berle who first said, "The average person will laugh when someone dressed up as a bad person slips on a banana peel and falls on their ass. But to make a comedian laugh an actual bad person has to slip on a banana peel and break their ass. Also, it's funnier if tragedy comes in threes. Because the average listener doesn’t know, unless you hit them in the head with it repeatedly, the importance of fruit to a healthy diet. Its bananas. *** And one can’t talk about diet anymore. That’s going too far. People won’t stand for it. Either way. There is ONE vegan corpse on Mount Everest. And you hear no end of it. Nobody ever talks about the carnivorous diets of all the other corpses which litter the mountain. Man those carnivores are humble. Quiet folk. Unassuming and tolerant. I hear you can still see the half eaten cheeseburger on the guy who serves as a marking post on the east slope. Hamburger Ned they call him. As climbers often say to each other – if you run into old hamburger Ned, you’ve gone too far! Can’t you count? Don’t you listen? Where were you at the last supper? I hear they re-used all the garnish. Who paid? *** Three comedians, each blindfolded, are presented with an elephant. So, when each comedian has a turn to speak and address the situation, they each must, in turn, address the elephant in the room. Remember, elephants are not cheap but comedians are. I am sorry for the animal cruelty implicit within this setup. The first comedian, confronted with the leg of the elephant, tried to just pull his own shtick and this was very revealing. He was trampled, and the crowd seemed to enjoy that. The second comedian, confronted with the animals trunk, didn’t seem to know whether he was coming or going. He’d been a long time in the business, you would think he would understand the importance of timing. The third comedian, confronted with the ass, insisted upon making everything about himself. And it wasn’t the right crowd for that. If he hadn’t been blindfolded he would have been able to see. Anyway,

Duration:00:10:25

Martin Van Buren and the unwanted package

2/16/2021
A charming castPod with a special appearance by Good ol' Charlie Brown. I was at home and I was not thinking about either Martin Van Buren or the kangaroo. I had real world problems on my mind. The kangaroo was famous, for, among other things, having carved a phallic replica he called “Mr. Pokey.” He carved it from hardwood. Really bang up job. Intricate. You could see the veins. It stood at about 8 1/2 inches, which was awkward if you were trying to conceal it. He told everybody it was 8 1/2 inches, but it was really 7 5/8. Everybody knew. Man is the measurer of all things. And every one of them, when no one was looking, had measured the thing. Some of them, the ones who were not good at math, consulted each other’s notes. That went just about as well as could be expected. Because of the whole issue about concealment, he eventually whittled it down to 3 1/4. It was never the same. But he made the bowl that held the weed, which was snuggled, nestled, really, between the cock and the balls, Bigger. And he tried to toke the disappointment away. He was not as popular after he carved the thing down. Who is to say what happened. Let history decide. As I said, I was not thinking about him. But when he hopped on over to my place, or rather was delivered by another, secure, as if in their pouch, I ended up calling Martin Van Buren. For help. “Hey Martin, how’s it hanging?” And there was some small talk. Not about Mr. Pokey. And then I said, “Hey Martin I got the kangaroo over here.” But that’s not really how it happened. I mean that happened. But it happened an hour or so later. After I had failed to dislodge the kangaroo from my own pouch. So when Martin said, “Fuck the kangaroo,” I had to change my tactic. He was not the first person to say Fuck the kangaroo. That day. And I just wanted him to bounce. The kangaroo came with a military issued shit-bag, so named because it contained all his shit. Notably Mr. Pokey. Nobody wanted to see that little thing. The kangaroo is running on empty. First thing he did was ask me to take him to a garden party. Said they could put him up there. So I put him in my car with his government issued shit-bag. And we took off. But when we got there, people ran into the house. A woman came out. Holding a baby. To prove she meant business. And she looked at me and she nodded and said hello, saying just that, hello and my name. Because she was polite. Then she looked at the kangaroo and said, “You got a lot of nerve coming around here MotherFucker.” And that’s how I learned the back story. Seems there had been a party the night previous and the kangaroo had been present, and drunk. He was also feeding drinks to good ol’ Charlie Brown. After he and good ol’ Charlie Brown got real drunk, wasted, they had a fight over this and that. And the kangaroo, who was an amateur boxer, had gone off and slugged good ol’ Charlie Brown. I pieced this back story together, by listening to the things the woman with the baby was saying. First she came out of the house and she was not angry at me. Rather she was angry at the kangaroo. Everybody today was angry at the kangaroo. And if they weren’t angry at the kangaroo, they would be. Because the kangaroo had gotten his kicks and now the play was turnabout. And she came out and called him a MotherFucker who shouldn’t be showing his face around here again and how dare he. And she waved the baby at him like some sort of a voodoo ritual. That you conduct when you're confronted with a MotherFucker of his type. And she turned around to walk away, with the baby, when she turned back and said “MotherFucker, you hit good ol’ Charlie Brown. In the face.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. I took it as fact. Pegged her as an eyewitness. Her name was Peg, by the way. I tell you this, though you will literally never see her again in this story. But I am not a MotherFucker. I was cleared once in a tribunal. By the way,

Duration:00:07:36

Carl Jung in the Sky with Zeppo

4/21/2020
This podcast is an excerpt from the novella "Sigmund, Falling Up!" by David Raffin. Photo by Craig Whitehead on Unsplash “Winner Winner!” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 “Someone Else’s Memories” "Simulation Hypothesis" "Line of Flight" from the album The Politics of Desire by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0.

Duration:00:16:51

Buy War Bonds, Won’t You?

4/18/2020
Photo by Museums Victoria on Unsplash As usual the More Than True podcast is subversive rather than political. An intro by Groucho, a discussion of the tragedy of Abbot And Costello, and Einstein's troubles with the classes. “Winner Winner!” "Erik Satie: Gymnopedie No 1" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album The Politics of Desire by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0.

Duration:00:07:45

More than One Day

2/9/2020
The More than True podcast returns with a vintage story about spies, Russians, shoes, USA electoral politics, and raisins. It's an audio rendition of the story More Than One Day in the Life of Igor Igoravitch, from the collection Hard Fought Illusions of Choice. Enjoy. It is strong. Like Stalin. “Winner Winner!” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album The Politics of Desire by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0.

Duration:00:26:40

Cupidity

5/14/2019
It's time for a tale of love. A love story, if you will. As old as the fingers of fate that surround. Heartwarming! Hearts on fire. “Someone Else’s Memories” and "Line of Flight" from the album The Politics of Desire by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0. “Winner Winner!" "Divertissement,” Schmetterling” and "Off to Osaka" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0

Duration:00:11:30

Genie, Genie, Genie

4/10/2019
A sparkling new podcast episode which dares tell the truth about wishes and the human heart. "Winner Winner!" “Divertissement,” “P.I. Tchaikovsky Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy,” “Ghost Dance,” “I Knew a Guy," “Camille Saint-Sans Danse Macabre” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 “Someone Else’s Memories” from the album The Politics of Desire by Revolution Void licensed under Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0.

Duration:00:14:04

More Than True with David Raffin ep. 1

11/24/2018
In these trying times what is needed is More Than True now more than ever.

Duration:00:23:46

Machines that measure sadness

7/21/2015
I know there hasn't been a podcast episode in three weeks. My apple-ologies.

Duration:00:00:10

Pod 6: A disquieting tale

6/22/2015
A story about a man and his place in the universe. A story about the many uses of cell phones. A story that asks the philosophical question: What is it that makes a chair? An excerpt from Tragic Stories Disguised as Jokes.

Duration:00:10:00

Pod episode 5: Obama has an old hat; George W. Bush a one-track-mind

6/14/2015
I have a joke about Gennady Zyuganov, Head of the Communist Party of the Russian Federation, but odds are you will never hear it. Even though Gennady Zyuganov is a funny name. To western ears. And this has nothing to do with the podcast. Sort of. Two pieces, one about Barack Obama telling jokes, one about George W. Bush having a one track mind. I don't ordinarily do topical material. The danger being that people will forget things like that the Nobel prize was given out to a man running a...

Duration:00:12:11

Pod episode 4: “Go Bananas, or Go-Round! With R.D. Laing.”

6/8/2015
R.D. Laing at play via Wikipedia If you are feeling off, perhaps you need a good talking to; which is why I have devoted the second half of the podcast to the Scottish psychiatrist R.D. Laing. I discovered him in college on the alternative reading list for psychology. He was an existentialist psychiatrist. This episode is sponsored by bananas. Not artificial bananas, but the natural mutant kind. Also there is some discussion of mass transit, other libidinous foods, and when to say yes....

Duration:00:10:27

Pod episode 3: Wonderful Cake

5/30/2015
This episode of the David Raffin podcast begins with an homage to the golden age radio show Escape! Then a story about a trip filled with false fronts. But I must warn you, should you seek to emulate the trail, the poison gas has since been removed from those roadside pup tents. It was for the best. It was a terrible tourist draw. (By the way, and this has nothing to do with the podcast episode so where better to place the observation but right here, I recently read George Orwell's Such,...

Duration:00:09:33