Pondering Pootan with Ajishio Taro & Hachimitsu Boy

Welcome to The Pootan Encyclopedia Merry Christmas! We're a collaborative community website about the history of Pootan. This wiki covers all types of Pootan bits such as Niamh talks about vtubers, Connor talks about football, they both forget to read emails again, and more. If you want to add an article about your favorite Pootan bit, go ahead. Rules Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Boys & Girls” by the Human League Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

Why am I supposed to upload a podcast? I still don't even really know what a podcast is. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Stranger in a strange land” by the Byrds Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

The moment man devoured the fruit of knowledge, he sealed his fate. Entrusting his future to the gorilla, man clings to a dim hope. Yes, the banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Attaining one's dream requires a stern will and unfailing determination. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. The silent voice within one's heart whispers the most profound wisdom. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Celebrate life's grandeur, its brilliance, its magnificence. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Only courage in the face of doubt can lead one to the answer. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. It is indeed a precious gift to understand the forces that guide oneself. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. There is both joy and wonder in coming to understand another. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. One of life's greatest blessings is the freedom to pursue one's goal. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. To find the one true path one must seek guidance amidst uncertainty. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. It requires great courage to look at oneself honestly and forge your own path. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Alongside time exists fate, the bearer of cruelty. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Only with strength can one endure suffering and torment. The banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. In the face of disaster lies opportunity for renewal. The moment man devoured the fruit of knowledge, he sealed his fate... Entrusting his future to the gorilla, man clings to a dim hope. Yet the banana sushi is the means by which all is revealed. Beyond the sushi shop arch lies the absolute end. It matters not who you are, Pootan awaits you. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “The End” by the Beatles Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

Realize Pootan Rater, the only reason that I'm here right now is that I wanted to be... Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Mother” by the Police Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

Dive into Gorilla Sushi! Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Time is Tight” by the Clash Content Warnings for the Series: Dehumanization Violence Animal cruelty Banana sushi Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

In Latest Bid to Lord Over Sesame Seeds, One Man Tries Grinding Them Away At the Port of Cromartie, a shipping container holds new weapons in man's battle against one of his oldest adversaries: Sesamum indicum—the sesame seed. The mastermind behind this arsenal is Pootan, an eighth-grade dropout turned comedian who makes an unlikely merchant of paste. The sinewy 51-year-old, who favors animal costumes and sidekicks, is a manzai practitioner who speaks in a distinctly laidback manner. But when it comes to those small white ovals, Pootan is no peacenik: He is the wielder of unique ceramic-and-sansho-wood mortar and pestle with a distinctive kushi-no-me pattern—he calls it a suribachi and surikoga. While sesame seeds are his personal bugaboo, he says the tool is effective for grinding medicinal herbs, black sesame seeds, and all sorts of other seeds. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Free as a Bird” by the Beatles Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

I guess you'd call it cowardice But I'm not prepared to go on like this I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing the bit Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Can't Stand Losing You” by the Police Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

This episode goes out to all the yuri-loving long-haul truckers out there, don't think we've forgotten about you, make sure to look for the bear diner next time you're on I-77 in Ohio near the West Virginia border... Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais.exportaud.io OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “With A Shout (Jerusalem)” by U2 Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

Faketan, also called Fakootan, are fan-designed fictional animal costumes based on the Pootan franchise of comedy specials. While many such designs have been created purely as fan art, others are made specifically as hoaxes to fool fans into believing they will appear in future seasons of the show, or as unique costumes added to fan re-edits. The word Faketan is a portmanteau of the words fake and Pootan. In Japanese, they are known as Oripoo (オリプー, from "original Pootan"). According to Connor, Faketan have existed "for almost as long as two weeks ago when Crystal did that one episode." Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “A Hard Day's Night” by the Beatles Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

"This could be my theme song. I'm a cancer and spent so many years growing up at the beach in Hollywood, FL. I used to be a beauty in my youth but sadly, never found the right man. Now, at 57, I'm alone and Jesus is my man now but the sweet gospel cannot replace our great Rock and Roll ballads." "I am 71 and I always thought this was Rod Stewart." "Paul wrote this and was about to give it to Rod Stewart. Peter interjected, thank God. He's the perfect one to sing this." "according to Peter he said that Paul told him it was for Rod and Peter said screw Rod I wanna sing it" Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Hard Luck Woman” by KIϟϟ Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

Niamh Schönherr has quit Pondering Pootan with Ajishio Taro & Hachimitsu Boy. The shock news must mean the end of Export Audio’s most famous podcast, which has been idolised by millions the world over for nearly three years. Today 36-year-old Schönherr will announce faer decision, and the reasons for it, in a no-holds-barred statement. It follows months of strife over policy in Export Audio, Pondering Pootan with Ajishio Taro & Hachimitsu Boys’ controlling network, and an ever-growing rift between Schönherr and faer podcasting cohost, Connor Brown. In faer statement, which consists of a series of answers to questions, Schönherr says: I have no future plans to record or appear with Pondering Pootan with Ajishio Taro & Hachimitsu Boy again. Or to grind any more sesame seed paste with Connor. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “The Ballad of John and Yoko” by the Beatles Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

I guess since we recorded these back to back, this one was also recorded entirely in a sauna. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.exportaud.io Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “You Never Give Me Your Money” by the Beatles Find out more at https://pootan.pinecast.co

This episode was recorded entirely within a sauna. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.bsky.social Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Hotter Than Hell” by KIϟϟ

Announcing the first and only normal vtuber fan. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.bsky.social Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Summertime Blues” by Eddie Cochran

If this episode does not bring you happiness, put it back where you found it and listen to three more. You may repeat this as many times as you'd like. If any other people are looking or feeling left out, share this podcast with them. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @FoxmomNia Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Don't Fight It, Feel It” by Primal Scream

To listen to this episode on New Year's Eve in the future and time it up so that the episode will countdown to midnight and end as you ring in the new, start this episode at 11:28:26. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.bsky.social Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “What You're Doing” by the Beatles

Unbeknownst to Connor and Niamh, an organization more powerful than they could possibly imagine had begun to make its move... and it was this organization that was behind the day's events. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @foxmomnia.bsky.social Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Bad” by Michael Jackson

Congratulations, Em! Your Pokémon are Wobloom and Wigglygross! All other Pokémon created this episode: Brebuffet Pumploom Bidmence Gourloom Cacpom Ambitar Ambiloom Nosetar Bonus Pokémon created after this episode was recorded: Bretar Tyraniloom Minlord Wailmime Wailcatty Breunny Pikauk Dituk Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @FoxmomNia Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Radio Magic” by Earthshaker

Hey, did you know that we take emails? We will definitely answer them right away in a very timely manner. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @FoxmomNia Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Spanish Bombs” by the Clash

Sorry, I'm trying to write this episode description as fast I can, I gotta go. Oh my god. Oh my god. Sorry, I'm... I'm leaving. Support the network at exportaud.io! Our schedule: exportaud.io/pootanschedule Pondering Pootan RSS: exportaud.io/pootan Ghost Divers RSS: exportaud.io/ghostdivers The Show: @PonderPootan Niamh: @FoxmomNia Connor: @rabbleais OP: “Ningen nante” by Yoshida Takuro ED: “Change” by Killing Joke