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Ladies Who Lunch

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Ladies Who Lunch lets you sit at the table and explore topics often left out of polite conversation with YouTubers Ingrid Nilsen and Cat Valdes. Write in to join their dialogue about sex, relationships, social phobias and more as they approach life's dilemmas with compassion and a sense of humor. New episodes every week.

Ladies Who Lunch lets you sit at the table and explore topics often left out of polite conversation with YouTubers Ingrid Nilsen and Cat Valdes. Write in to join their dialogue about sex, relationships, social phobias and more as they approach life's dilemmas with compassion and a sense of humor. New episodes every week.
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Ladies Who Lunch lets you sit at the table and explore topics often left out of polite conversation with YouTubers Ingrid Nilsen and Cat Valdes. Write in to join their dialogue about sex, relationships, social phobias and more as they approach life's dilemmas with compassion and a sense of humor. New episodes every week.




The Last Episode of Ladies Who Lunch

This is it! Our last episode of the podcast. We’re celebrating 2 amazing years by answering letters sent in by you, our listeners. We’re talking about toxic friendships, divorced parents, motivation and more, plus sharing what we’ve loved most about making this podcast. Thanks to everyone who has listened, written in, tweeted us and approached us in real life... we’ve had an incredible time with this project, and we hope, by listening, that you’ve learned a little more about yourself and...


Comparing Pain + the Silence Around Miscarriages

This week’s episode is inspired by a letter from a listener who wrote in to discuss how people often compare their own pain to another’s. We know that empathy creates connection, and sympathy can create disconnection. Empathy is a vulnerable choice because you have to connect with something within yourself that might be painful. This conversation began another conversation about miscarriages, and the silence that often surrounds them when they happen. In order to move past the shame, we...


Saving Yourself from Tech Addiction

After being inspired by a recent Katie Couric doc about our brains and technology, we’re diving into our own relationships with tech. Tech use and addiction is something that’s heavily accepted and even expected of us. Social media, video games, apps, and other digital products are carefully engineered to keep you coming back for more. App notifications, autoplay, likes, messages are scientifically proven to compel us to watch, check in, and respond right now — it’s either that or FOMO....


When What You Think Will Make You Happy Doesn't

This week, we're talking about the desire for a quality or situation that you think will make you happy once you get it: a raise, a perfect body, a relationship, etc. We’ve bought into the myth that happiness is something we achieve when everything in our life finally looks the way we’ve been thinking it should. These things alone don’t create lasting happiness, so happiness becomes an elusive thing that we desire but don’t actually know how to achieve. The truth is that happiness is not...


What Happens When You Envy Someone?

This week, we’re talking about feelings of admiration and envy. Sometimes, these feelings can come up in response to encountering someone who you consider to be more successful, more beautiful, funnier, smarter or better. Admiration is seen as a noble sentiment, but envy, by contrast, is thought to be inherently bad. When we admire someone, we do so from a distance. When we envy someone, we picture ourselves in their place and feel that in order for us to be desirable, we must possess the...


Getting Over Getting Older

This week, Ingrid is joined by her long-time friend and professional makeup artist / beauty editor, Francesca Giaimo, to talk about the beauty-related pressures that women feel as they grow older. From the moment we are born, society sets expectations for women. How we look and act is what moves us up the ladder of what this culture deems as successful. Aging is inevitable, but it's barely acknowledged in our culture. We are frequently told that the world is our oyster and that we can do...


When Courage Meets Compassion

This week, we're talking about the balance between courage and compassion. If you have too much courage, you can become destructive to yourself and to others, but if you have too much compassion, you can be paralyzed by your desire to please others. Finding balance can be hard, but it's important. We believe that courage opens you open to everything, including compassion. If we are courageous, we are free to be compassionate when and where we are inspired to do so. Sometimes, we see...


When Your Needs Don’t Align With Your Partner’s

Learning to live alongside and love another person is tough, but it's only made harder by the many issues you face in a long-term relationship. Compatibility is only the first step. Factors like timing, current circumstances, goals, and uncontrollable occurrences will often get in way of something great and turn it into a challenge. Sometimes these things can be surpassed, and the two of you will come out on the other side better for it, but there is always the chance that one factor could...


Body Wisdom with Holistic Health Coach Cara's Kitchen

This week is all about body wisdom. We're joined by Cara Cifelli from Cara's Kitchen, a holistic health coach who has a personal mission of helping others love the skin they are in and develop a balanced relationship with food. Our relationship with food and our bodies can influence every aspect of our life, and unfortunately, 97% of women surveyed have body image issues. It takes time to cultivate an awareness about your body, but ultimately, your body won't lie to you. Listen to your...


A Desire to Belong

This week, we're talking about a human need: a sense of belonging. Belonging to a greater community improves your motivation, health, and happiness. When you are connected to others, you learn that all people struggle and have difficult times, and you feel less alone. If you feel like you don't belong anywhere, you might have inner dialogue that says: who you are isn’t okay. In the end, there are usually some core beliefs, emotions and blocks that dictate this sense of not belonging and...


When Does Self-Care Become Selfish?

Self-care is having a moment -- it's a great way to strengthen yourself and take care of yourself at the same time. People approach self-care in different ways. For some, it's a bubble bath and Netflix night. For others, it’s disconnecting from the Internet when the news cycle gets sad and overwhelming. A lot of the time, it's taking time to yourself. Some people think that practicing self-care is unacceptable because it sends the message to others that your well-being is your ONLY...


What If?

This week, we're talking about that dreaded question that enters our mind in times of anxiousness: "what if?" Worriers think that worrying helps them to prepare for every possible outcome, but in reality, it interferes with problem solving. Our worries may seem specific: “What if I lose my job?” “What if I never fall in love?” -- but the consequences that we’re really worried about stay vague because we never think past the “what if?” Other times, "what if?" questions can be about feelings...


Moving On and Letting Go

Letting go of something is complex. It can be from a relationship, a home, a job, an idea about yourself and who you are. Just because something was right for you in the past, doesn’t mean it still is. You discover more about who you are and what you want out of life, and then you realize there are deliberate changes you need to make to keep up with the changes happening around you and within you. In this episode, Cat shares how she needs to re-home her dog -- that change has been a really...


When People You Love are Sexist

This week, we're talking about how we deal with sexism from people we love: how it relates to people who mean well but may be ignorant, how to navigate through conversations with people who are actually sexist and oppressive, and how to deal with a lack of respect for people who are complacent with sexist people. At some point in every woman’s life, she will face sexism somewhere - in a relationship, in a workplace, walking down the street. We are all part of social systems or environments...


Being On the Cusp of Change

This week, we're talking about change. Whether a relationship starts or ends, you're moving, you have got a new job, or you've lost someone you love, change (whether it's good or bad) causes stress. You never know exactly what you're going to get, which often frightens us. When we experience the world or ourselves in a certain way for an extended period of time, we develop core beliefs that make up what we think life is supposed to be. We tend to see change as a loss rather than just as...


Competition and Comparison

This week, we're talking about competition. For some people, competition forces you to give your best. Having that challenge right on your heels pushes you to run faster, work harder and think deeper. You can also learn from the successes and failures of other people. Our insecurities become stronger whenever we experience disappointments and challenges in our personal and professional lives. It's important to acknowledge this pain and address it. We're diving into our own competitive...


Content We Love

This week, we're spreading the love. As people who create content for a living, we want to share some love and appreciation for the TV shows, podcasts, movies and content creators we are into right now. Sometimes it's good for the soul to take a break from the world around you and indulge in some feel-good, interesting, or inspiring stories. Note: We discuss minor plot points in this episode, so here's a small spoiler alert!


Our Obsession with Celebrity

This week, we're talking about celebrities and the desire to know all about them. Why do we, as a culture, value fame over almost everything else? The celebrity serves as both an object of worship and of disgust, and all of this falls into the arc of fame. Thanks to social media platforms, it’s easier than ever for people to gain fame. A large amount of followers can launch someone into stardom with little effort, sometimes even by accident! Just as quickly, celebrities can disappear from...


Love Letters

So many of the letters we get in our inbox are about love, so we decided to dedicate an entire episode to them! We're talking about what it's like to crave "the chase", how to appear more approachable when you're independent, long distance relationships and much more. A listener opens up to us about her bisexuality and how her upbringing may have stifled her freedom to explore it -- now, her marriage to her husband is stable but sexless. We also answer a letter from a listener who isn't...


On Being Judgmental

This week is all about judgment. We are all inundated with explicit judgments, like the number of likes, faves, retweets, positive and negative comments on our social media. People who interpret their worth from things like the approval and attention of others are especially vulnerable to depression, especially in this environment saturated with judgment. We're talking about how we deal with judgment and criticism in our daily lives. Ingrid and Cat share some things they've done to dive...