Queen for a Damn Day
S10.E09: Knee Deep
IN A WORLD WITHOUT SCRIPT EDITING, Roseanne finally settles on knee surgery, the basement floods, and Darlene meets Art Alexakis in 1865. SJ and Debbie talk about how this season could have been improved, and their hopes for next season. Our Show Notes totally Sparkle and Fade (sorry).
S01.E13: Bridge Over Troubled Sonny
Crystal finally gets mourning her husband Sonny out of her system, and Darlene gets nicotine into hers. SJ reminiscences about how D.A.R.E. made her say “yes” to drugs, and Debbie bazooka-barfs the last thing you’d want to. SJ and Debbie agree that everyone is suckily insensitive to sweet Crystal. Our Show Notes will try not to drive you over the Monument Street Bridge.
S10.E08: Netflix & Pill
Your queens tangent off into Klondike history (??), maiden/mother/crone as seen on the show, and fishnet wearing tips BECAUSE PATRIARCHY. We're kind of relieved this season is winding down. Our Show Notes have more of a saloon-whore vibe than a riverboat one.
S10.E06: No Country for Old Women
The Conners now have four generations under one roof and the center cannot hold. Meanwhile, Mark is delightful UNLESS you're the one who should be parenting him correctly, DARLENE. Debbie talks about the logistics of setting a table scene for filming, SJ marvels over fashion basics, and are marzipan villages even actually a thing?? (NO.) Our Show Notes are here for you, even if they need a little help getting their compression socks on.
S01.E09: Dan's Birthday Bash
Dan has a birthday and a reckoning with a Bobo who lets him know he’s not a youngster anymore. Our Queens discuss street fisticuffs, the 1950s sitcom influences on the show, and how 14-year-olds don’t dress like Becky anymore. Our Show Notes are a steroid case that thinks you should KEEP IT DOWN and listen to your little woman.
S01.E08: Here's to Good Friends
Roseanne channels her inner drag king for Crystal the Doormat, and Jackie catches Booker being a total fuckboi. Queen Debbie and Queen SJ occupy themselves with overthinking the logistics of bringing elaborate gelatin desserts to work, real snow days and fake TV snow, and SJ reveals her stunning ignorance about WHAT EVEN IS FOOTBALL? Have a skosh of a gander at our SHOW NOTES! SJ was a LEETLE overcaffeinated for this ep. Poor Debbie!
S01.E07: The Memory Game
Dan commissions a family photo for his and Roseanne's 15-year high school reunion, and a secret from the deep, dark, peppy past is uncovered. Queen Debbie and Queen SJ debate how slutty velvet is, period inequality, and if Roseanne can actually sing (spoiler alert: NO). We'll shake our pom poms at you until you check out our Show Notes!
S01.E06: Lovers' Lane
Roseanne orchestrates a bowling night which gets Jackie closer to Booker, Becky closer to Chip, and Crystal closer to being Queen SJ's spirit animal. Queen Debbie and Queen SJ talk about American idioms, how graceful Dan is, and the politics of Booker's weird sex-bet. Please note that SJ's levels were just TOO DARN HIGH so is clipped a little at points. Sorry for the sketchy sound quality! Also, please partake of our show notes, which are not riddled with fungus (unlike Dan's bowling...
S10.E05: Darlene v. David
In a whiplash-inducing, exposition-dump of an episode, both David AND Bev return. David and Darlene race through some emotional cabbage. Er, baggage. If Queen Debbie and Queen SJ sound a little underwhelmed...well...if the jazzy, STD-riddled turban fits. Lettuce entertain you with our Show Notes, stay lentil you're through. BECAUSE NOW THEY'RE DOING VEGAN JOKES. GET IT? DO YOU??
S10.E04: Eggs Over, Not Easy
Becky gets some bad news about her future as a surrogate. SJ and Debbie consider aspirational dog names, being a young old person, and the complicated relationships of the Conner women. Check out our Show Notes for this episode!
S01.E05: Radio Days
Dan and Roseanne enter a songwriting contest to win a prize, and Roseanne ponders her past as an aspiring writer and revolutionary. Jackie tries to decide if she wants to hit it and quit it with the old Bookerino. Please note that we try to get the new episode out midweek, but we've been hit by a bad case of school (SJ) and travel (Debbie) this week. We are releasing this one early. Check out our show notes for this ep!
S01.E04: Language Lessons
Dan is out of work but he and Roseanne are having fun playing house. Meanwhile, Dan loses patience with Jackie's sody pop-purloining, couch-surfing ways. Debbie and SJ take a hard look at the extreme drama that was boiling behind the scenes by the time episode four was filming. Have a look-see at our show notes for this episode!
Dan and Roseanne keep romance alive with a date night where they come face-to-face with a divorcee. Meanwhile, the kids are home alone until Aunt Jackie shows up. Queen Debbie and Queen SJ were excited that there was a moment on TV where a hard-working mom was allowed to talk about her hopes and dreams that extended beyond her daily drudgery. You can see scenes from this episodes and most of the things we talked about in the Show Notes, like wild 80s patterns, Alicia Goranson's blog,...
S10.E03: Roseanne Gets the Chair
We do a deep dive into Harris and our own teenage dumbassery, shoplifting, how significant a woman's muffin can really be, and who John Goodman looks like this week. Don't forget to check out our Show Notes!
S01.E02: We're in the Money
Subterfuge is the name of the game when Dan scores a drywall job and the grownups have to decide if there's any money left over for a splurge. Don't forget to check out our Show Notes for this episode.