Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

In this special episode, I’m joined by my husband, Derin, for a candid and heartfelt reflection on our journey together—more than eight years of parenting, navigating relationship shifts, and supporting our neurodivergent child through adolescence and into early adulthood. This is a personal conversation for us, one where we open up about what this path has really looked like behind the scenes. We talk about how our partnership has evolved over time, the challenges we’ve faced individually and together, and the ways we’ve learned to stay connected through some very intense seasons. We also share what’s helped us—communication, honesty, a willingness to grow—and how we’ve come to better understand each other while showing up for our child. This is an honest look at the complexities of parenting and partnership, and what it means to keep choosing each other along the way. About Derin Basden Derin Basden is a seasoned and accomplished leader with a proven track record in technology, design, and operations, gained through working with major multinational corporations, including NBCUniversal, Disney, and Microsoft. He is also the husband of Debbie Reber, the founder of Tilt Parenting, and a dedicated supporter of her work. He is enthusiastic about his role on the Tilt Team and is committed to contributing to the movement that empowers neurodivergent children to achieve their full potential. Derin leads technology and finance operations for Tilt, and ensures the smooth functioning and effective execution of Tilt’s mission. Things you'll learn from this episode How family life evolves through moves, global stressors, and the transition from childhood to young adulthood Why adolescence reshapes family dynamics and invites growth for both parents and kids How maintaining a strong partnership through communication, shared routines, and intentional connection supports the whole system Why respecting autonomy while staying connected is essential when parenting a neurodivergent young adult How simple rituals—like walks, humor, and honest conversations—help rebuild and sustain connection Why self-regulation, honesty, and ongoing personal growth are key to navigating changing roles within the family Resources mentioned Debbie & Derin on Their Parenting Journey: Part 1 (Tilt Parenting podcast, 2017) Debbie & Derin on Their Parenting Journey: Part 2 (Tilt Parenting podcast, 2018) Derin Basden - LinkedIn Minecraft Mods mentioned (Inventory Pets, Animania, Better Invisibility) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Gail Post, the psychologist behind the popular Gifted Challenge blog, joins me to talk about her book, The Gifted Parenting Journey: A Guide to Self-discovery and Support for Families of Gifted Children, which combines research, theory, and clinical experience, and extends her advocacy efforts to address the needs of parents of gifted children. In this episode, we dive into the realities of parenting gifted and 2e kids — the common challenges parents experience as part of their journey, why it can sometimes feel uncomfortable to celebrate our child’s accomplishments with others and how that impacts our kids and us, and how to handle our own expectations and pressures we may feel because of our child’s unique learning profile. We also explore what many families of gifted kids' experience as a complicated relation with the word “potential,” as well as how we as parents can manage our own uncomfortable emotions that may arise in parenting our kids, including anxiety, envy, and guilt. ABOUT GAIL Gail Post, Ph.D. is a Clinical Psychologist, parenting coach and consultant, workshop leader, and writer. She is also a Clinical Associate Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine in practice for over 35 years, she provides psychotherapy with a focus on the needs of the intellectually and musically gifted and twice-exceptional, parenting coaching and workshops, and consultation with educators and psychotherapists. Dr. Post is the parent of two gifted young adults and served as co-chair of a gifted parents advocacy group when her children were in school. THINGS YOU'LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE The common challenges parents raising gifted and 2e kids may experience as part of their journey Why parents of gifted kids feel intense pressure surrounding their child’s educational path and how that can negatively impact families Why the word “potential” is a loaded one for many families, and how parents can change their relationship with this concept Why anxiety is common amongst parents raising gifted or 2e kids The unique challenges BIPOC parents raising gifted kids face Why self-awareness is the roadmap to attuned parenting when raising gifted and 2e kids About Gail PostThings you’ll learn from this episode Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special 10-year anniversary and 500th episode of Tilt Parenting, I’m turning the spotlight toward the community that has shaped the show from the beginning. I’ll share key findings from a new parent survey about the lived experience of raising neurodivergent kids, including the profound isolation many families feel and the hard-won confidence parents develop as they learn to support their children. But the bulk of this episode features reflections from longtime community members on how the neurodiversity conversation has evolved over the past decade, how this journey has changed them personally, and where they believe the movement needs to focus next. Across their stories, common themes emerge: greater visibility and language around neurodivergence, deeper compassion and nervous system awareness, the importance of community, and the urgent need for more empathy and change in schools, healthcare, and other systems that still lag behind what families and research already know. Things You'll Learn from this Episode Why a lack of understanding across schools, communities, and social circles remains the biggest struggle for families How parenting neurodivergent kids can feel exhausting and isolating—and how finding language and community can be life-changing Why so many parents are discovering their own neurodivergence, highlighting this as a whole-family journey How parents are growing more compassionate, self-aware, and willing to trust alternative paths while holding both grief and hope Why the future calls for systems change and a stronger commitment to connection-first, strengths-based support for neurodivergent kids Resources Mentioned The Tilt Parenting Report Zach Morris Ned Johnson Dr. Mona Delahooke’s website Neurodiversity-Affirming Schools: Transforming Practices So All Students Feel Accepted & Supported by Emily Kircher-Morris and Amanda Morin Neurodiversity University Education Hub Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Supporting 2e students continues to be one of the biggest challenges for those of us raising twice-exceptional children, and today we’re going to do a deep dive into how to do this. Maria Kennedy, director of the Bridges Educational Group at Bridges Academy joins me to talk about how the definition of giftedness in some countries keeps gifted students from getting into gifted programs, the importance of appreciating every child’s unique strengths and value, and ways parents can advocate for their children’s unique learning profile, even within their existing school systems that may not be designed to support or understand neurodivergent learners. ABOUT MARIA KENNEDY Maria Kennedy first joined the Bridges Academy staff as the director of the Phoenix Program. After successfully growing the program each year, she has taken on the position of director of the Bridges Educational Group. A speaker, author, and advocate, Maria has been featured on “Bright and Quirky,” as a panelist and educational expert. Several schools have used her webcast, ‘Strengths, Challenges, and my journey as my son’s advocate,” for teacher training. An educator for almost 30 years, Maria received her B.Ed. and M.Ed. in education from Manchester University (U.K). She earned Advanced Teacher Status from the Manchester Department of Education for her ability to develop curriculum and her skills within the classroom. She traveled internationally, teaching students and training teachers how to tap into the strengths of their gifted and challenged students. THINGS YOU'LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE How the definition of giftedness in some countries prevents gifted students from getting into gifted programs Why we should lean into widening the scope of what giftedness means so we can properly identify everyone’s gifts What appreciating everyone’s unique value can bring to a child’s education and development What the roadblocks are for our educational system to be more open to embracing the changes needed How parents who are navigating a traditional educational system can advocate for their 2e children Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Listen to an episode of Understood.org’s new podcast, Everyone Gets a Juice Box, about the messy realities of neurodiverse parenting with journalist and radio host Jessica Shaw. As a mom of two, she brings honesty and humor to the everyday chaos, victories, and challenges of raising kids who learn and think differently. In this episode, I’m the guest, and I share the story of how we ended up homeschooling—something I truly never imagined choosing. We had tried everything to make traditional school work… multiple schools, supports, specialists. Homeschooling was never part of the plan. But when life shifted in a big way, we found ourselves on a completely different path—one that lasted six years and changed how I think about learning, kids, and what success can look like. If you’ve ever found yourself doing something you swore you’d never do, or questioning the path you thought your family would be on, I think this conversation will resonate. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today we’re talking about what it really means to thrive in a world that often feels overwhelming—for our kids and for us. My guest is Stephanie Malia Krauss, author, speaker, and strategist whose new book How We Thrive: Caring for Kids and Ourselves in a Changing World explores the urgent need to protect the human essentials—things like sleep, play, connection, and wonder—that modern life so often erodes. Stephanie and I explore the idea of “rehumaning” how we live, learn, and parent. We talk about the interconnectedness of body, mind, heart, and spirit, and the importance of collective care in raising kids in today’s world. Stephanie shares practical, grounded ways to navigate overwhelm and make small shifts in daily life that can help families move from merely surviving to truly thriving. About Stephanie Malia Krauss Stephanie Malia Krauss is an author, speaker, and strategist helping leaders rehuman how we live, learn, and work. Her newest book, How We Thrive: Caring for Kids and Ourselves in a Changing World, examines the urgent need to protect the human essentials—like sleep, play, connection, and wonder—that modern life diminishes or denies. Stephanie's commitment to this work began as a teacher and coach, where she witnessed how different environments can deplete or restore people. She later founded a school for young people furthest from opportunity, and now leads national and state efforts in education and youth development. Working with leaders from classrooms to Congress, Stephanie advises states, districts, and national organizations through her consulting shop, First Quarter Strategies. Stephanie is also the author of Whole Child, Whole Life: 10 Ways to Help Kids Lives, Learn, and Thrive and Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World. Things you'll learn from this episode Why collective care and community are essential antidotes to modern overwhelm and burnout How the practice of rehumaning helps us reconnect with our core human needs Why honoring the interconnectedness of body, mind, heart, and spirit is key to real resilience How small, intentional shifts in daily rhythms can meaningfully improve family well-being Why thriving means living in full animation—rooted in love, belonging, and advocacy—not just enduring Resources mentioned How We Thrive: Caring for Kids and Ourselves in a Changing World by Stephanie Malia Krauss Rehumaning Childhood (Stephanie’s Substack) Rehumaning website Geoffrey Cohen on Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides (Stanford Digital Education) Stephanie Malia Krauss’ website Whole Child, Whole Life: 10 Ways to Help Kids Live, Learn, and Thrive by Stephanie Malia Krauss Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World by Stephanie Malia Krauss Whole Child, Whole Life website How We Can Prepare Differently Wired Children for an Uncharted Future, with Stephanie Malia Krauss (Tilt Parenting Podcast) How to Help Our Kids Thrive in Tough Times, with Stephanie Malia Krauss (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World by Stephanie Krauss Dr. Eric Soto-Shed (Harvard researcher) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr Nicole Tetreault was propelled to study neuroscience after her mother’s diagnosis with Parkinson’s disease. She then went on her own journey of self-discovery while supporting her twice-exceptional son, and recognizing many traits in herself. All this culminated in her new book Insight Into a Bright Mind: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Stories of Unique Thinking, which melds groundbreaking research with the captured experiences of unique, creative, and intense brains. I’m excited to bring this conversation to you and give you an inside look at this book, as it’s truly a unique and important addition to what currently exists to help parents better understand their exceptional kids’ needs, and perhaps to better understand themselves as well. ABOUT DR. TETREAULT Nicole Tetreault, Ph. D., is a neuroscientist, author, meditation teacher, and international speaker on topics of neurodiversity, neurodevelopment, creativity, mental health, and wellness. Dr. Tetreault received her PhD from Caltech specializing in neurodevelopment and neurodegenerative disorders. As the founder of Awesome Neuroscience, she translates the most promising neuroscience and positive psychology for people to live their best life. Dr. Tetreault has authored numerous academic papers on intelligence, autism, brain evolution, neuroinflammation, and behavior. As a Milton Career Exploration Prize recipient from Caltech, Dr. Tetreault is creating Beyond the Cell, a transformative program to rehabilitate incarcerated women through teaching guided meditation, neuroscience, literature, and expressive writing. Her newest book, Insight into a Bright Mind, explores groundbreaking research examining the experiences of unique, creative, and intense brains through interviews, storytelling, and literary science, while advocating for new directions of human and neurodiversity. THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE: What led Nicole to investigate neurodiversity and become a science communicator The important points about brain wiring that are important to understand about educating neurodiverse individuals What is meant by asynchrony and how it relates to processing and behaviors What we can learn from the current moment coming out of the Covid-19 pandemic when it comes to educating neurodiverse students Nicole’s encouragement for parents who self-identify as neurodivergent as part of learning about their own child Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today we’re diving into a topic that so many women experience but far too few of us are adequately prepared for—perimenopause. My guest is Dr. Mary Claire Haver, a board-certified OB-GYN, Certified Menopause Practitioner, and New York Times bestselling author of The New Menopause and her most recent book, The New Perimenopause. Through her clinical work, her online programs like The Galveston Diet, and her platform The ’Pause Life, Dr. Haver has become a leading voice in making menopause education accessible, practical, and grounded in science. In our conversation, we explore the biological and emotional complexities of perimenopause, why early intervention—including hormone therapy—can be so important, and the gaps in medical training that have left many women feeling dismissed or unprepared. Dr. Haver shares practical strategies for managing symptoms, explains what she calls “The Menopause Toolkit,” and offers empowering guidance to help women advocate for their health and navigate this transformative phase with more knowledge, confidence, and support. About Dr. Mary Claire Haver Dr. Mary Claire Haver, MD, FACOG, CMP, is a board-certified Obstetrics and Gynecology specialist, a Certified Menopause Practitioner from The Menopause Society (formerly the North American Menopause Society (NAMS)), an Adjunct Associate Professor at University of Texas Medical Branch (UTMB), a Certified Culinary Medicine Specialist, and a passionate entrepreneur and best-selling author with a focus on women's health. Dr. Haver graduated from Louisiana State University Medical Center and completed her Obstetrics and Gynecology residency at UTMB. As her patient population grew older, Dr. Haver started receiving numerous complaints and concerns about weight gain during menopause. This inspired her to do a deep dive into the science of menopause, aging, and inflammation beyond what she was taught in school and residency, which led to the creation of The Galveston Diet online program and, in 2023, a national bestselling book. Dr. Haver integrates a patient's medical history, symptomatology, nutrition, exercise, supplements, and possibly hormone therapy, or what she likes to call "The Menopause Toolkit." Dr. Haver has a large social media following of over 7 million, where she posts advice for menopausal women and learns a great deal from her followers and community. She aims to make menopause care easy and accessible for everyone. She founded The 'Pause Life, a comprehensive approach to menopause education and support, and is the author of the New York Times bestseller, The New Menopause and her most recent title The New Perimenopause. Things you'll learn from this episode What differences there are between the biological process of perimenopause and menopause The impact of hormone shifts in estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone on women’s mental health and brain fog during perimenopause Ways to effectively communicate with healthcare providers who may not be up to speed on menopause research and/or may be dismissive of symptoms The benefits and timing of menopause hormone therapy during perimenopause Resources mentioned The Pause Life (Mary Claire’s website and online community) The New Perimenopause: An Evidence-Based Guide to Surviving the Zone of Chaos and Feeling Like Yourself Again by Dr. Mary Claire Haver The New Menopause: Navigating Your Path Through Hormonal Change with Purpose, Power, and Facts by Dr. Mary Claire Haver UnPaused Podcast Dr. Mary Claire Haver on Instagram Dr. Mary Claire Haver on YouTube Dr. Mary Claire Haver on Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Mike Postma joins me for a personal conversation about the many challenges facing gifted and 2e / twice-exceptional students, especially social and emotional challenges, and this is one of those episodes that just might leave you feeling pensive, concerned, and ignited all at the same time. About Dr. Mike Postma Dr. Michael Postma is an educator, author, speaker, coach and consultant dedicated to the holistic development of the gifted/twice-exceptional (2e) community. Over the last two decades, Dr. Postma has served as a gifted teacher in the classroom, as an administrator and leader of gifted schools – both public and charter schools in multiple states, and was the architect of the Minnetonka Navigator Program, a magnet school in Minnesota specifically designed for highly gifted and twice-exceptional students. He currently is the President and co-founder of Gifted and Thriving, LLC and the Programming Director for the non-profit SENG (Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted) organization. Dr. Postma has published a number of articles and two books, the latest titled The Inconvenient Student: Critical Issues in the Identification and Education of Twice-Exceptional Students. He travels and speaks nationally and internationally on a variety of topics such as: the social/emotional development of the gifted, understanding twice-exceptional learners, gifted/talented programming, neuroscience and the gifted/2e brain and more. Things you’ll learn from this episode Mike Postma’s personal story of growing up a gifted and 2e kid with very little support in a time when many neurodifferences weren’t recognized or understood What “holistic development” means in the context of children, especially twice-exceptional children Why Mike says social emotional development has to be one of the foundations for academic and intellectual potential Where society is with regards to understanding asynchronous development How schools can make small accommodations to make school more successful for gifted and 2e students Why Mike wrote his book The Inconvenient Student and what he hopes it does in the world Mike thoughts on how the educational system needs to be revamped Why Mike says 2e people are among the most vulnerable populations Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today we’re turning the lens inward and talking about the inner life of parents—especially those of us raising neurodivergent kids. My guest is Matthew Fishleder, a licensed marriage and family therapist who works with adults navigating anxiety, life transitions, and the emotional complexity of being human. A central focus of Matthew’s work is supporting parents in understanding their own worry, guilt, and burnout—not as personal failures, but as understandable responses to chronic stress. In our conversation, we explore what’s actually happening when parents get stuck in chronic worry about their child’s future, how self-criticism takes root, and why tending to our own inner world is foundational to our kids’ sense of safety. Matthew shares practical, compassionate strategies for relating differently to anxiety so we can show up with more steadiness, presence, and connection—even in the most activated moments. About Matthew Fishleder Matthew Fishleder is a psychotherapist licensed in California and Maryland who works with adults navigating anxiety, life transitions, and the emotional complexity of being human. One focus of his work is the inner life of parents, especially those raising neurodivergent kids. His approach is neurodiversity affirming and grounded in humanistic and acceptance based frameworks. Matthew helps parents understand worry, guilt, and burnout as understandable responses to chronic stress, and supports them in relating differently to anxiety and self criticism so they can show up with more presence, steadiness, and connection. Things you'll learn from this episode How tending to a parent’s inner life and emotional awareness strengthens the entire family system Why chronic worry and anxiety are understandable responses to parenting—and how to relate to them differently How parenthood reshapes identity and invites ongoing self-discovery Why normalizing difficult emotions reduces shame and builds emotional resilience How cultivating self-regulation and holistic self-awareness helps parents show up with steadiness and presence Resources mentioned Growing Present (Matt’s website) Internal Family Systems Laura Key on ADHD Aha Moments, Parenting, and Burnout (Full-Tilt Parenting) An Interview with Dr. Dan Siegel About The Yes Brain (Full-Tilt Parenting) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today I’m talking with neurodivergent educator Sam Young about a topic I haven’t covered on the podcast before, and that is our neurodivergent kids’ social lives. The world has changed so very much in the past few years, including in no small way how our kids relate to other kids. I get a pang of nostalgia when I think about how I used to form friendships when I was younger in a more analog world, but I can also feel excitement about the many possibilities that have opened up for kids like ours to find their communities thanks to the technology they’re growing up with. In this episode, Sam is going to talk with us about what a meaningful and healthy social life might look like for our differently wired kids, and how we can support them in the process. We explored how online communities have impacted socializing for neurodivergent kids, how parents can support kids in developing the skills to help with social anxiety, key elements to look for in ideal social environments for our differently wired kiddos, and much more. About Sam Young Sam Young MEd, or Mr. Sam as his families call him, is a growth-minded, two-time Fulbright Scholar and Director of Young Scholars Academy, a strength-based, talent-focused virtual enrichment center that supports twice-exceptional, neurodivergent, and gifted students and their families. Mr. Sam is a neurodivergent educator who has ADHD. As an ADHD learner, he has a tremendous understanding of, experience in, and respect for all things related to neurodiverse education. Before founding Young Scholars Academy, Mr. Sam taught in a variety of capacities—including nearly a decade at Bridges Academy — at an array of programs in the US, Europe, and Asia. Travel and culture are near and dear to him. He has led 2e students to over 7 countries for immersive cultural and educational trips. Mr. Sam has been featured in the documentary 2e2: Teaching The Twice Exceptional, the textbook Understanding The Social and Emotional Lives of Gifted Students, 2nd Ed., Variations Magazine, over 20 podcasts, 10 seminars, 2e News, and other publications. Things You'll Learn from This Episode: What reimagining our kids’ social life really is about How online communities have impacted our kid’s social lives What Sam’s students wish their social lives looked like How parents or adults in kids’ lives can support them in building skills to help them with social anxiety Sam’s thoughts on social skill groups and their efficacy Expectations that parents have that might be getting in the way of their kid’s social lives How parents can support a kid who is feeling alone to the point of their self-confidence and self-worth being affected Resources Mentioned Young Scholars Academy Young Scholars Academy Winter Courses 10 tips to help 2e kiddos socialize AND a bonus video Young Scholars Academy on Facebook Young Scholars Academy on Instagram Bridges Academy Davidson Young Scholars Joseph Renzulli Susan Baum Asher Talks About the Highs and Lows of His Social Life (Tilt Parenting Podcast) About Sam YoungThings you’ll learn from this episodeResources mentioned about the social lives of 2e students Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today we’re talking about motivation—what it is, what it isn’t, and why so many of our neurodivergent kids get mislabeled as “unmotivated” when the real story is far more nuanced. My guest is Dr. Ellen Braaten, an expert on motivation and the author of several books including Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less, and her newest release, The Motivation Mindset Workbook: Helping Teens and Tweens Discover What They Love to Do. Ellen shares why motivation is not a fixed trait, how identity shapes whether kids lean in or shut down, and what often gets in the way for learners with ADHD and other differences. We talk about how parents can shift from pushing performance to supporting purpose, and how giving kids the space to discover what genuinely interests them can be transformative for confidence, engagement, and long-term growth. About Dr. Ellen Braaten Dr. Ellen Braaten is the founding director of the Learning and Emotional Assessment Program (LEAP) at Massachusetts General Hospital and an associate professor at Harvard Medical School. She has published numerous scientific papers on topics related to ADHD, learning disorders, child psychopathology, processing speed, and intelligence, as well as many books for parents and professionals, including the bestsellers Bright Kids Who Can’t Keep Up, and Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation. Most recently, she coauthored The Motivation Mindset Workbook: Helping Teens and Tweens Discover What They Love to Do.Dr. Braaten has a strong interest in educating the public on topics related to child mental health, maintains an active speaking schedule, and contributes regularly to local and national news outlets. Things you'll learn from this episode How motivation is a dynamic skill that ebbs and flows based on environment and context, not a fixed trait Why helping teens and tweens identify their strengths and values lays the foundation for authentic motivation How responsibility and meaningful real-world experiences spark engagement and ownership Why identity development plays a central role in sustaining long-term motivation How practical, strengths-based activities can reignite momentum when kids feel stuck Resources mentioned Dr. Ellen Braaten’s website The Motivation Mindset Workbook: Helping Teens and Tweens Discover What They Love to Do by Dr. Ellen Braaten & Dr. Hillary Bush Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation by Dr. Ellen Braaten Bright Kids Who Can’t Keep Up: Help Your Child Overcome Slow Processing Speed and Keep Up in a Fast-Paced World by Dr. Ellen Braaten How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation, with Dr. Ellen Braaten (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Exploring Slow Processing Speed with Dr. Ellen Braaten (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Traits of Flow According to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi The Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds Dr. Martin Seligman / Positive Psychology Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you ever wondered if SEL (social and emotional learning) in school and classrooms really matters? I’ve been exploring this question a lot about over the past year, as well trying to understand the recent increase in parental and political pushback in the US specifically that is putting the future of SEL in schools at risk. I wanted to get into a deep conversation about SEL for the show, and so I reached out Dr. Joseph Lee, a psychiatrist with a special interest in social and emotional learning and helping people achieve what he calls optimal mental healthiness. We had exactly the conversation I was hoping we would, as we got into so many important topics, including the state of children and young adult’s mental health today, demystifying what SEL or social emotional learning actually is, why SEL matters, how it’s best introduced in schools, the limitations in the current educational model for social emotional learning curriculums, what the pushback against SEL is really about, and what it’s at stake if our children aren’t provided with social and emotional learning opportunities. I think this is such an important and timely conversation – I hope that you enjoy it and that you help me amplify this episode by sharing it in your communities. About Dr. Joseph Lee Dr. Joseph Lee, MD., is a Psychiatrist in private practice in Redondo Beach, California. He is also an educator in social and emotional learning (SEL) and provides individual and group supervision to licensed therapists looking to add mental healthiness and SEL principles to their own practices. Dr. Lee has a medical doctorate from University Of California, Los Angeles, School Of Medicine. Key Takeaways Dr. Joseph Lee’s thoughts on the state of children and young adult’s mental health today What SEL or social emotional learning actually is and why it matters Ways that SEL can be weaved into traditional educational curriculum, as well as the use of specific SEL curriculum What social and emotional learning inside schools looks like in practice The “why” behind the pushback against SEL in the recent years and what’s it’s at stake if we lose the ability to teach SEL in classrooms Resources Mentioned Mental Healthiness / Dr. Joseph Lee’s website Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning Dr. Joseph Lee & Mental Healthiness on Facebook Dr. Joseph Lee on Twitter Hiding in Plain Sight: Youth Mental Illness (Ken Burns documentary) Daniel Goleman Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships by Daniel Goleman U.S. Surgeon General Issues Advisory on Youth Mental Health Crisis Further Exposed by COVID-19 Pandemic Parenting the New Teen with Dr. John Duffy (Tilt Parenting Podcast episode) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this short solo episode, Debbie responds to a question she hears from many parents navigating unconventional education paths: looking back, what would youchange—and what wouldn’t you—about your twice-exceptional young adult’s schooling journey. Debbie will share why there’s no perfect path, what she's glad she did (including embracing flexibility and a gap year), and how she's learned to let go of timelines and trust that our kids are on their own trajectory—even when it looks different from everyone else’s. About Debbie Debbie Reber, MA is a parenting activist, bestselling author, speaker, and the CEO and founder of Tilt Parenting, a resource, top-performing podcast, consultancy, and community with a focus on shifting the paradigm for parents raising and embracing neurodivergent children. A regular contributor to Psychology Today and ADDitude Magazine, and the author of more than a dozen books for children and teens, Debbie’s most recent book is Differently Wired: A Parent’s Guide to Raising an Atypical Child with Confidence and Hope. Resources mentioned Dr. Dan Peters Discusses the Teen Years & Preparing for Navigating Launch (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Best Gap Year Programs for Neurodivergent Students (Thrive Autism Coaching) Dr Eric Endlich on Gap Programs for Neurodivergent Students (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Debbie Talks About Her Transition to Homeschooling (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Lindsay Lyons, an educational justice coach, former NYC public school teacher, and parent who helps families and educators create space for real, meaningful conversations with kids joins me to talk about the challenges educators and families face when navigating hard conversations in schools, especially around inclusion, equity, and neurodivergence. We talk about the importance of student voice, creating safe spaces for dialogue, and addressing the fears and barriers that can get in the way of real change. At the heart of it all is dignity—how honoring kids’ humanity and lived experiences is foundational to building school environments where all learners can truly belong. About Lindsay Lyons Lindsay Lyons is an educational justice coach who helps families and educators create spaces for real conversations with kids about current events, hard history, and other high-emotion topics. A parent and former NYC public school teacher, she holds a PhD in Leadership and Change, and is the founder of the blog and podcast, Time for Teachership. Lindsay believes all students deserve literacy, criticality, and leadership skills. Things you'll learn from this episode Why creating emotionally safe spaces for honest conversation is essential for learning and connection How listening to students’ insights can shift adult perspectives and lead to more just educational practices Why meaningful professional development requires ongoing, year-long support rather than one-off workshops How restorative practices and constructive disorientation can strengthen community and transform school culture Why engaging families in difficult conversations—with respect and care—is critical to lasting change Resources mentioned Lindsay Lyons website Grab the free Staying Engaged framework from Lindsay Lindsay’s Rstorative Conference Companion (free access for listeners) Want to Spark Change? Create “Constructive Disorientation” (blog post by Lindsay Lyons) Controversy in the Classroom: The Democratic Power of Discussion by Diana Hess Challenge Day Zoretta Hammond Culturally Responsive Teaching and the Brain: Promoting Authentic Engagement and Rigor Among Culturally and Linguistically Diverse Students by Zoretta Hammond Ready for Rigor Dr. Chris Wells Explains the Theory of Positive Disintegration (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s episode is all about social skills, but from an updated lens that really speaks to the lived experiences of today’s kids. My guest is writer and journalist Catherine Newman, and we’re going to dive into her new book, What Can I Say? A Kids Guide to Super Useful Social Skills to Help You Get Along and Express Yourself. What Can I Say is aimed at kids ages 10 and up, and it includes practical and accessible advice to help kids and teens learn social skills, including everything from introduce themselves, express empathy, be persuasive, and apologize to compromise, ask for help, be grateful, and comfort a friend. In this conversation, Catherine and talk about why learning social and interpersonal skills are more important than ever for our kids, despite the fact that their lives are evolving to include more time spent online. We also talk about the climate for social emotional learning and ways parents and educators can to reinforce the social skills our kids are learning. About Catherine Catherine Newman is the author of the memoirs Catastrophic Happiness and Waiting for Birdy, the middle-grade novel One Mixed-Up Night, the kids’ craft book Stitch Camp, the how-to books for kids How to Be a Person and What Can I Say? and the novel We All Want Impossible Things (forthcoming, Harper, November 2022). She edits the non-profit kids’ cooking magazine ChopChop, writes the etiquette column for Real Simple magazine, and is a regular contributor to the New York Times, O, The Oprah Magazine, Parents magazine, Cup of Jo, and many other publications. She lives in Amherst, Massachusetts, with her family. Key Takeaways Why it’s still important to learn social skills and interpersonal skills even though our kids’ lives are evolving to include more time spent online Why it’s important to spend time learning social skills just as we would learn any other type of skill like algebra or singing The importance of learning interpersonal skills that focus on empathy, setting boundaries, being curious, and being supportive and inclusive of people with different identities How OT can help neurodivergent kids grow up with advanced social emotional skills What parents and educators can do to support and reinforce the social skills they are learning Resources Mentioned Catherine Newman’s website Catherine on Instagram What Can I Say? A Kids’ Guide to Super Useful Social Skills to Help You Get Along and Express Yourself by Catherine Newman How to Be a Person: 65 Hugely Useful, Super-Important Skills to Learn before You’re Grown Up by Catherine Newman Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Patty Laushman, a speaker, autism life coach, and the author of the book Parenting for Independence: Overcoming Failure to Launch in Autistic Emerging Adults, joins me to talk about one of the misunderstood stages of parenting: supporting our neurodivergent kids as they move into emerging adulthood. In our conversation, Patty and I unpack the concept of “failure to launch,” why that label is actually unhelpful and inaccurate, and how redefining independence can change everything. We talk about self-determination, motivation, and what support actually looks like during this phase of life. Patty also shares her SBN parenting framework—Support, Boundaries, and Nudges—and offers grounded, compassionate guidance for navigating this transition while strengthening trust and connection along the way. About Patty Laushman Patty Laushman is an author, speaker, educator, and coach who specializes in supporting neurodivergent individuals and the families who love them. With both personal and professional experience, she deeply understands the challenges of being neurodivergent in a world designed for those who are more neurotypical—and the transformative power of the right kind of support. She is the founder and head coach at Thrive Autism Coaching, where she and her team help neurodivergent teens and adults, as well as their parents, build the skills and confidence needed to thrive. Patty developed the SBN™ parenting framework, a step-by-step system that teaches parents how to use support, boundaries, and nudges to help their autistic emerging adults reclaim motivation, build momentum, and move toward more meaningful lives on their own terms. Through her Parenting for Independence group coaching program, Patty has guided hundreds of families through this unexpected stage of parenting—helping them rebuild trust, strengthen relationships, and finally start seeing progress. Her compassionate, neurodiversity-affirming approach has been described by clients as “the only thing that has ever worked for us.”She lives with her husband, son, and Golden Retriever in the Denver/Boulder metro area. In her spare time, you’ll find her hiking, camping, headbanging to heavy metal, or devouring medical or crime dramas. Things you'll learn from this episode How understanding a child’s lived experience lays the groundwork for more effective, compassionate parenting Why the term “failure to launch,” while loaded, can help families find the right support and resources How redefining independence to include positive interdependence supports healthier outcomes for emerging adults Why self-determination is central to helping neurodivergent young adults move out of stuckness and burnout How the SBN framework—Support, Boundaries, and Nudges—guides parents in creating momentum without control Why resetting expectations and timelines can ease parental shame and anxiety while supporting real growth Resources mentioned Patty Laushman’s website Thrive Autism Coaching Parenting for Independence: Overcoming Failure to Launch in Autistic Emerging Adults by Patty Laushman How to Get Your Autistic Emerging Adult in the Driver’s Seat of Their Life (freebie from Patty) Parenting for Independence (Patty’s program) Private Coaching for Parents with Patty The Real Work of Parenting Neurodivergent Young Adults (Part 1) — a crossover episode with Penny Williams (Full-Tilt Parenting podcast) The Real Work of Parenting ND Young Adults (Part 2) (Beautifully Complex podcast) A Conservation with Dr. Gina Riley on Self-Determination Theory & Motivation (Full-Tilt Parenting) A Conversation with Linda Murphy About Declarative Language episode (Full-Tilt Parenting) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special kid’s POV edition of the podcast, Asher answers questions from listeners — specifically our kid audience — about his social life. Like many differently-wired kids, social scenes aren’t always smooth sailing for Asher. He sometimes struggles to pick-up on others’ cues and his occasionally intense emotional reactions to certain situations can be off-putting to other kids. We talk about it all in this episode, as Asher opens up about not only what’s challenging for him in relationship to other kids, but what strategies he’s using to get through these challenges and maintain friendships, something that is very important to him. Questions answered in this episode: What are your friendships like? What kind of challenges have you had in your friendships and how have you handled them? What happens when you have a meltdown in front of a friend? What do you do when kids are mean to you or call you names like “weirdo?” What advice do you have for kids starting a new school? How do you manage group situations that don’t go your way? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s conversation is a candid, honest look at what it’s really like to parent while navigating ADHD yourself. My guest is Laura Key, Vice President of Content Strategy at Understood.org and the host of the award-winning ADHD Aha! podcast. Laura was diagnosed with ADHD at 30, and she brings both professional insight and lived experience to this conversation as a mom raising two neurodivergent kids. Laura and I talk about the emotional labor so many mothers carry, the unique challenges parents with ADHD face, and why self-compassion is not optional—it’s essential. We dig into shame, burnout (both the quiet, everyday kind and the big, overwhelming kind), communication with partners, and the pressure that can come with framing ADHD as a “superpower.” This episode is an honest exploration of the joys and struggles of parenting with ADHD, and a reminder that you’re not alone in any of it. About Laura Key Laura Key is Vice President of Content Strategy at Understood.org, a non-profit organization dedicated to empowering the 70 million people with ADHD, dyslexia, and other learning and thinking differences in the United States. She's also the host of the award-winning ADHD Aha! podcast. Things you'll learn from this episode How adult ADHD is often misread as anxiety at first, and why addressing one can illuminate the other Why late identification can bring both grief and relief after years of self-blame for brain-based differences How shame and invisible executive function demands can quietly dominate family life, especially for moms Why being great in a crisis but overwhelmed by daily details is a common—and misunderstood—ADHD pattern How burnout can show up as both “micro” and “macro” exhaustion, including frenetic busyness that masks collapse Why recovery often starts with basic regulation and more realistic self-expectations, not grand productivity plans Resources mentioned Understood.org Understood on Instagram Understood on LinkedIn ADHD Aha (podcast) Imposter Syndrome After a Lifetime of Hacking Her ADHD (Debbie with Laura on ADHD Aha) Understood’s podcast study on women, podcasts, and ADHD Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s episode is all about self-care for autistic people, and joining me is return guest Dr. Megan Anna Neff of Neurodivergent Insights. Megan Anna has just published a new book called Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask! which she wrote to help autistic people accept themselves, destigmatize autism, find community, and take care of physical and mental health. Megan Anna considers self-care to be a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community, a framework that really resonated with me. So we talk about that, along with other ideas from Megan Anna’s book, including how internalized ableism can hinder self-care, considerations for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA, and insights into co-regulation, sensory considerations, and how advocacy and accommodations in the workplace can also be forms of self-care. ABOUT DR. MEGAN ANNA NEFF Dr. Megan Anna Neff (she/they) is a neurodivergent Clinical Psychologist and founder of Neurodivergent Insights where she creates education and wellness resources for neurodivergent adults. Additionally, she is co-host of the Divergent Conversations podcast. As a late-diagnosed AuDHDer (Autistic ADHD), Dr. Neff applies their lived experiences from a cross-neurotype marriage and parenting neurodivergent children to their professional focus. They are committed to broadening the mental health field’s understanding of autism and ADHD beyond traditional stereotypes. This personal-professional blend enriches their work and advocacy within neurodiversity. Dr. Neff is the author of Self-Care for Autistic People and a forthcoming book on Autistic Burnout. Additionally, she has published in several peer-reviewed journals on topics ranging from neurodivergence, place attachment, relational psychoanalysis, social psychology, and integration of spirituality into psychotherapy. KEY TAKEAWAYS Why self-care should be approached with self-attunement and an understanding of one’s own needs Why self-care is a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community How internalized ableism can hinder self-care and why it’s important to address it Ideas for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA regarding autonomy, co-regulation, and sensory considerations Ways to practice self-care in the workplace, including self-disclosure, documentation, and setting realistic expectations ADDITIONAL RESOURCES Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s website Self-Care For Autistic People by Dr. Megan Anna Neff * A special bonus offer for Tilt Parenting community * Divergent Conversations Podcast Neurodivergent Insights on Instagram Neurodivergent Insights on Facebook Dr. Megan Anna Neff on LinkedIn Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s Link in Bio Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Diagnoses and Misdiagnoses (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Sarah Wayland Is This Autism? A Guide for Clinicians and Everyone Else by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices