Adoptees On

308 | Alexandra Mann Who among us doesn’t love a good movie? And how many times have you been watching a film and, jump scare, some terrible adoptee trope comes out of nowhere. Today’s guest, Alexandra Mann had that happen one too many times and what grew out of that all too common adoptee misrepresentation in the media, was the Adoptee Film Fest which is now in it’s second year (spotlighting adoptee filmmakers, telling adoptee stories). Alexandra shares about her personal story as a domestic, transracial adoptee from Hong Kong, and how therapy preserved her relationship with her adoptive parents after a giant secret came to light. We do have a mention of suicidal ideation in this conversation so please listen with care. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

307 | [Healing Series] The Nothing Place with Pam Cordano, MFT I’m so glad to be back with you after our summer break! Today’s episode is a special episode in our Healing Series that truthfully I’ve been scared to do and I’ve intentionally been waiting to do because of this fear. This concept has been on my show topic list for several years, ever since I heard the words, “The Nothing Place”, for the first time. I believe that naming and describing this idea to you could be so deeply helpful for adoptees that we just have to go there today. This could potentially break open a block we’ve had in describing the true complexities and impact adoption separation has on us. Pam Cordano, MFT, one of our favourite adoptee therapists is here to tell us about The Nothing Place, the glaring gaps in attachment theory that don’t address adoptees’ very real separation trauma, and how examining this part of us can unlock a new sense of grounding and belonging that we haven’t been able to access before. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

306 | [Healing Series] Money and Worth with Marta Isabella Sierra Cifuentes, LMHC For our last episode before our summer break, we’re talking about adoptees and money! Marta Isabella Sierra Cifuentes, LMHC is back and teaching us all about money, worthiness, the obvious commodification of children, the basics. Marta said it best in this episode, ”if you're adopted, it's not even about the money. It's about belonging, respect, feeling seen, feeling acknowledged, mattering to the other people and equality.” Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

305 | Maria Diemar and Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom We have two incredible adoptee activists with us today. Maria Diemar and Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom, both adopted in Sweden, joined up to elevate adoptee causes in some very impactful ways. Maria is the subject of Lisa’s latest graphic novel, The Excavated Earth, which exposes a horrific story of how thousands of Chilean babies were literally kidnapped and stolen to be sold for adoption to Sweden and many other countries. You won’t believe some of the shocking details that Maria and Lisa share with us today. Lisa also shares a few thoughts with us on the findings of the South Korean Truth and Reconciliation Commission. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

304 | Dr. Michele Merritt Today’s guest is Dr. Michele Merritt - a philosophy professor who’s coined the new term Adoptism to describe the ways adoptees are marginalized. Michele shares some of her personal story, including the curiosity she always had about where she came from. We discuss what led her to start critiquing adoption publicly and the barriers to publishing these critiques that some academic journals put in place, like the classic, “I know one adoptee and they don’t feel that way”. We do mention suicide during this conversation, so please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

303 | Craig Mod Craig Mod the author of Things Become Other Things: A Walking Memoir joins us to share his story. We deep dive into Craig’s recent reunion with his birthmother including the complexities of searching in the digital age when so much of our information is publicly available. Being fairly new to adoptee-land, Craig also gave Haley a chance to talk through some of the things that complicate the usual sunshine and rainbows view of adoption. Update - Craig will join us for our July book club when we will be reading Things Become Other Things. We do make reference to sexual assault briefly at a couple of different points during this episode, so please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

302 | greiby medina Today we’re pleased to introduce you to greiby medina (they/them), author of The One Who Loves You the Most. greiby was adopted from Honduras at age two-and-a-half to a single white mother. We discuss changing names, why greiby is not a fan of the term “coming out of the fog”, and being afraid people won’t like us because we’re adopted. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

301 | [Healing Series] Wounds of Childhood with Anna Linde, Sexologist This is a special episode in our Healing Series where we bring on adoptee experts to tackle issues that may impact our mental health. Most often we’re talking with therapists but today I invited Anna Linde, a sexologist, to talk with us about the impacts of childhood sexual abuse on adopted people. This issue is so prevalent in our community and yet hardly anyone ever talks about it. We’ve talked about so many difficult things on the show that I think we’re finally ready. So although we do keep this to a high level discussion, please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

300 | Haley's Sisters We’ve reached our 300th episode! I found my paternal side of my family 14 years ago, and I discovered that I had three younger siblings. So even though I’m the only adoptee on today’s show, I thought you’d enjoy this peek behind the curtain, exploring what was it like for my young sisters when they were told at age 9 and 12, that they had a surprise older sister. Full Show Notes and Transcript Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

299 | Dr. Abby Hasberry I’m so excited to welcome Dr. Abby Hasberry back to the show today! We are celebrating her brand new book, Adopting Privilege: A Memoir of Reinventing My Adoptee Narrative. Abby is a therapist, a scholar, an adoptee and a birth mother. We get into all of it: coercion in adoption, parenting after placing a child for adoption, reunion from both sides, we even talk about sororities! Abby also addresses why so many adoptees go on to place a child for adoption themselves. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

298 | Kit Myers We’ve been waiting several years to have today’s guest on, and when better then to celebrate his brand new book! Professor and critical adoption scholar Kit Myers is with us to talk about his new book, The Violence of Love: Race, Family, and Adoption in the United States. Kit is an adoptee from Hong Kong, and he shares some of his personal story including a recent reunion he got to experience a couple of months ago. We also dive into culture camps and what happened when society tried to “destigmatize adoption” for the sake of adoptive parents. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

297 | Adé Carrena I don’t think we’ve ever had anyone on the show that shares today’s guest’s profession! I’m thrilled to introduce you to Chef Adé Carrena, she’s the subject of a beautiful new documentary called Bite of Benin. Adé is passionate about using food as a storytelling tool and has worked to bring West African flavours and spices to a global audience. She shares some of her personal story with us today, including being taken at age ten to the United States with her sister to be adopted. We do mention some difficult topics in this episode, so take good care when deciding to listen. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

296 | Connor Howe I’m so excited to introduce you to our guest today! We are talking all about open adoption with Connor Howe, who probably already know as adopted_connor from his many videos online. We talk about his personal story, including what it’s like to grow up with a sibling that is your adoptive parents’ biological child. We also discuss what lead Connor to get in front of the camera to critique adoption in such a public way. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

295 | Lee Herrick We are starting the year off with such a delight, Lee Herrick, the California Poet Laureate, joins us today! Lee recently released his latest poetry collection, In Praise of Late Wonder, which is focused fully on the topic of adoption. Today we talk about what it means to feel significant as an adoptee, why writing prose felt a little more comfortable than a whole memoir, and we word nerd out a little on crosswords and wordplay. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

294 | Kathy Mackechney, LCSW We are doing a hybrid Healing Series episode with adoptee and adoptee therapist, Kathy Mackechney, LCSW. Kathy shares part of her story with us, including how she was prepared for rejection during her reunions, but was instead surprised by eager acceptance. Getting into the therapy of it all, Kathy is an Internal Family Systems practitioner and has developed the idea that not all of our parts get adopted. We unpack what that means, including that somewhere inside us we can access who we may have been, had we not been separated from our original families. Kathy is one of the first, if not the first, adoptee therapist(s) to have an entire chapter published in a clinical text that focuses on how to work with adoptees - it’s literally the chapter we should assign our therapists to read! Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

293 | Dr. Julie Lopez, PhD, LICSW This is a special episode in our healing series where I interview therapists who are also adoptees themselves, so they know from personal experience what it feels like to be an adoptee. Today I’m so pleased to welcome back Dr. Julie Lopez, author of Live Empowered! We are talking all about how labels can be highly problematic for adoptees. We discuss how nonsensical the term “reactive attachment disorder” is when in fact most of us are just having perfectly normal reactions to an abnormal situation. Dr. Julie is an expert in implicit memory continues to inspire us that change and growth is always achievable and how we can access our pre-verbal traumas. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

292 | Shelby Redfield Kilgore Shelby Redfield Kilgore is a Korean adoptee and filmmaker. You can watch her documentaries and videos on YouTube alongside 800,000 other folks who’ve already had the pleasure. We talk about Shelby’s passion for sharing adoptee stories and how that shifted in tone over the years. We also talk about her health struggles and the impacts those have had on her reunions and motherhood. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

291 | Kae Wangare Leonard Today we welcome Kae Wangare Leonard to the show. Kae is a writer, athlete and artist, born and adopted in Kenya by white Americans. She shares some of her story with us, including what does home mean when you’ve lived in multiple countries. We discuss what it means to be an adoption abolitionist, and we have a little disagreement whether Kae’s art, poetry and prose is therapeutic or not! Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

290 | Kristal Parke Today’s guest is filmmaker and fellow podcaster, and fellow Canadian, Kristal Parke! Kristal is the subject of the documentary, Because She’s Adopted. Today Kristal shares some of her story with us including her non-paternal realization, her road to sobriety, her visits back to the Opaskwayak Cree Nation in Manitoba, and meeting many of her biological family members, including her biological father. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

289 | Bruce Porth Part 2 Today is part two of a two-part episode that we began last week, with our friend Bruce Porth. Today we talk a little more about reunion and what it looks like when someone is being dishonest with you, and also about using breathwork and psychedelics as healing modalities. Have you ever met one of those people that when they speak you just have to listen to every word? Bruce is one of those people for me. We hope you enjoy getting to know him better with us. Full Show Notes Here Join our adoptee community on Patreon here Check out our upcoming live events here! This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.