Where Words Can’t Reach: Shedding Light on our Dark Side
Podcasts
Do you find yourself, thinking you are not good enough or that you are not loveable? Often there are few words to express such experiences. This is probably based in the way we made meaning of our early relationships and is shame based. Burdened by shame, parts of us stay hidden for fear of being cast out by family and friends. This show assists you to understand the impact that shame has on the relationship with ourselves and others. Neuroscience also informs us that our buried unconscious memories hold vast amounts of information that the body knows, but the conscious mind does not. This program opens up a conversation about the world of shame, how it has been needed in our past and the cost that comes with holding on to it. We delve into the world of darkness by listening to professionals who help people transform their shame. In addition, we invite listeners like you to speak of their journey of shedding light on their dark side.
Location:
United States
Genres:
Podcasts
Description:
Do you find yourself, thinking you are not good enough or that you are not loveable? Often there are few words to express such experiences. This is probably based in the way we made meaning of our early relationships and is shame based. Burdened by shame, parts of us stay hidden for fear of being cast out by family and friends. This show assists you to understand the impact that shame has on the relationship with ourselves and others. Neuroscience also informs us that our buried unconscious memories hold vast amounts of information that the body knows, but the conscious mind does not. This program opens up a conversation about the world of shame, how it has been needed in our past and the cost that comes with holding on to it. We delve into the world of darkness by listening to professionals who help people transform their shame. In addition, we invite listeners like you to speak of their journey of shedding light on their dark side.
Language:
English
Episodes
Love and Betrayal
11/28/2019
On this show John will talk about when we hear the word “betrayal” we usually think about sexual infidelity but there are other kinds of betrayal and there are two kinds of agreements that are often broken, which can be experienced as a betrayal. John will talk about how we heal from a betrayal or abandonment and the stages people tend to go through. He speaks to how betrayal can be a transformative experience and what that look like? John will help the listener understand how to build trust after a betrayal and how commitment fits into the picture and how can we create a secure connection with another person so that we minimize betrayal and abandonment?
Duration:00:57:57
Understanding the physiology of Shame and its role in development
11/21/2019
Shame is a ubiquitous human experience. It is used in every culture to socialize children and to protect the tribe. Healthy shame has purpose, function and teaching us how to thrive in community. But toxic shame debilitates us and isolates us from humanity. It is different from other emotions. Our physiological reaction to shame helps us to maintain the interpersonal bridges that are imperative for our survival. It increases the likelihood of being embraced by and remaining a part of the tribe. It is the best solution for a seemingly impossible situation. But when shame is internalized and identified with, we spiral into self-loathing and form the belief that we are without value or purpose and therefor unlovable. Releasing the underpinning of toxic shame restores vibrancy, self-esteem, resilience and self-reliance.
Duration:00:56:14
What happens after getting out of the cult called NXIVM
11/14/2019
This show will look at the dark side of being a leader and promoting recruitment to hundreds of people into an organization that treated women like sex slaves. Sarah Edmondson will describe to the listeners how her mission to make the world a better place was manipulated and distorted, to meet the sexual gratification and power of a few. Sarah will share with the listeners the guilt and shame that she felt in introducing so many people into NXIVM and the journey of being shunned by those who did not believe what she was saying about the cult. This episode will help listeners to find courage to follow what they know is the right thing to do and make new decisions even when so much is at stake.
Duration:00:57:23
Melting the Shame Freeze
11/7/2019
In response to a difficult situation, our nervous system tends to do one of three things to survive. Fight – Flee or Freeze. We will talk about shame as a freeze state that affects both the body and the mind, turning attention inward towards a focus on “what’s wrong with me” and making it hard to function effectively. And we will look at ways the shame freeze can be melted.
Duration:00:55:47
Using the Self to Heal Wounded Parts
10/31/2019
Through my training with Virginia Satir and Richard Schwartz I have learned how to help people access their Self and to facilitate the healing of wounded parts by the Self. The Self is that energy space that holds within it the capacity for compassion, curiosity and wisdom. Once accessed, it can help the parts unburden themselves from the pain of trauma that they carry. This is extremely empowering because the person becomes a compassionate witness and healer for themselves and through the process integration occurs. Integration can be thought of as differentiating and linking. This means that the therapy process is one of helping people identify their parts and then link the Self to them so that healing can occur.
Duration:00:56:42
Breaking the Patterns of Shame
10/24/2019
Learn about the three faces of Shame: 1.Emotionally dysregulated. 2.Feeling in deficit. 3. Dissociated from their own shame and vulnerability
Duration:00:57:20
Using Creativity to Counter Shame
10/17/2019
This episode will look at what shame is and how to use your creativity to transform it.
Duration:00:55:39
The Dark Side of Addiction: Shame, Trauma, Pain and Suffering
10/10/2019
This episode will explore addiction and the internal experiences of people who have lived in this kind of darkness, cast aside by family, friends and society both emotionally and physically. Shame is a destructive and debilitating shroud that is heavy, dark and excruciatingly difficult to overcome. Especially when one’s own behaviour and life choices play a part in developing shame. However as you will discover throughout this conversation, shame starts young and weaves its way into the unconscious psyche of these individuals setting them up to feel different before their own behaviour becomes to blame. Most people only see the external, focussing on the behaviour that is presented to the world, what is seen. Teresa shares some of her experience both personally and professionally of the actual internal conflict and suffering that is experienced in the darkness of addiction.
Duration:00:54:58
Reclaiming your Body through Trauma Informed Yoga-Part 2
10/3/2019
This second part of the show will center around the healing process with shame. The truth that we are injured in relationship and therefore heal in relationship, but not necessarily in the relationship that injured us. The truth that the 'internalized other' of the less then 'good enough' caregiver, can be transformed into a loving mothering person to oneself through self-compassion and extreme internal validation.
Duration:00:55:22
Reclaiming your Body through Trauma Informed Yoga-Part 1
9/26/2019
This episode will look at the development of shame through insecure attachment and trauma. In particular domestic violence as my own story, but also the countless other stories I experience in my work, as shame is the most pervasive symptom of trauma to work through. As well as the many faces that shame manifests - persistent victim, perfectionist, hustler, asshole, etc...
Duration:00:55:13
Creating Spiritually:Rich Intimate Relationships and Friendships
9/19/2019
This show will look at intimacy and spirituality and how we are all wanting deep connection with another. John talks about how to reconcile our desire for emotional and sexual intimacy with spiritual warnings about attachment and craving. John will inform the listeners on how to become connected to their feelings and longings.
Duration:00:51:16
Healing Shame in Couples
9/12/2019
The more we care about each other, the more vulnerable we are to shame. Intentionally or unintentionally, we poke each other in the tender spots. Couples can shame each other multiple times a day, often without realizing what is happening. This can become a highly reactive cycle, preventing both people from getting their basic safety and attachment needs met. And shame can distort how we hear each other; the received message may have little to do with the message the partner is attempting to send. In this segment we will explore the blame or shame game couples can fall into and how to help them stop shaming each other and work together to create a secure base and heal the wounds of the past.
Duration:00:53:14
Different Kinds of Shame
9/5/2019
This program will explain, with reference to interpersonal neurobiology, how consistent failures of interpersonal attunement and recognition lead to fragmentation and dissociation, the genesis of chronic shame.. It will distinguish between the processes of adaptive or useful shame events and maladaptive or destructive chronic states of shame. It will describe how various kinds of misattunement lead to various configurations or “flavours” of shame. It will discuss how shame is related to trauma, addiction, and certain kinds of family patterns. With all this as context, it will propose that “right brain” listening is an antidote to shame.
Duration:00:57:37