Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Have you ever felt like your resilience is being pushed to its limits, especially in the chaotic and complex world we live in today? Dr. Alexandra sits down with organizational psychologist, researcher, and New York Times best-selling author Dr. Tasha Eurich to delve into the insights from her new book, Shatterproof: How to Thrive in a World of Constant Chaos (and Why Resilience Alone Isn’t Enough). In this conversation, they discuss the myths of resilience, as well as what a “resilience ceiling” is and how to identify when we’ve hit it. Most importantly, they talk about how to understand the limits of resilience so that we don’t, as Dr. Tasha would call it, “grit gaslight” ourselves when our usual coping strategies don’t work the way they used to. You'll come away from this episode with: Resources worth mentioning from the episode: https://resilience-quiz.com/ Shatterproof: How to Thrive in a World of Constant Chaos (And Why Resilience Alone Isn't Enough) https://bookshop.org/p/books/shatterproof-how-to-thrive-in-a-world-of-constant-chaos-and-why-resilience-alone-isn-t-enough-tasha-eurich/9f0e6a8876113ed0 Managing Back to School Stresshttp://masterclass.com/backtoschoolhttp://pesi.com/dralexandraContinue the conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon: https://form.jotform.com/212295995939274Love Every Dayhttps://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530https://dralexandrasolomon.com/subscribe/https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There are a few things we likely can all agree on: (1) we are living in a very polarizing time, (2) it’s hurting us, and (3) the way that we talk about politics is broken, given that we are all living in different information orbits. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra sits down with Mónica Guzmán who offers us some hope for the relationships in our lives that have suffered as a result of this polarization. She also offers us the perspective we need to help us stay grounded, even as the structures all around us fiercely demand our attention and invite our reactivity. The goal is not necessarily to seek to change each other’s view on the issues but to change our view on each other. And to see that “engagement is not endorsement”, as we work to enter into curious dialogue with the people in our lives and to perhaps notice the ways that we are not as divided as we believe we are. You’ll come away with this conversation with: Resources worth mentioning from the episode: Reclaim Curiosityhttps://www.moniguzman.com/subscribeI Never Thought of It That Way: How to Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Timeshttps://bookshop.org/p/books/i-never-thought-of-it-that-way-monica-guzman/22293096?ean=9781637740323&next=t&next=t&affiliate=4380Managing Back to School Stresshttp://masterclass.com/backtoschoolhttp://pesi.com/dralexandraContinue the conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon: https://form.jotform.com/212295995939274Love Every Dayhttps://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530https://dralexandrasolomon.com/subscribe/https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/

We’re living in a time of information abundance (sometimes information overload!) and lots of that information is about mental health, wellness, and relational health! But there’s a difference between consuming content and integrating it. When we consume, the information might just pass through us. Whereas when we integrate, the information weaves its way into our unique story or situation. This creates insight and the potential for a shift in mindset, in emotion, in belief, and in behavior. Reflect and journal with Dr. Alexandra to integrate core lessons from the podcast, continuing with today’s conversation from the archive. Originally released in September 2022, Dr. Alexandra and Dr. Thema Bryant discuss the importance of resting and of tapping into the things that make you feel truly alive. They also recognize that the ways the system impacts our sense of identity, may hinder us from experiencing ease in rest or leisure. They invite us to incorporate these essential self-care acts into our lives little by little. Get out your favorite pen and journal to reflect on these perspectives: Journaling Prompts: Resources worth mentioning from the episode: Reimagining Love episode, Coming Home to Ourselves: The Path to Thriving with Dr. Thema Bryant https://dralexandrasolomon.com/podcasts/coming-home-to-ourselves-learning-to-thrive-with-dr-thema-bryant/ Homecoming: Overcome Fear and Trauma to Reclaim Your Whole, Authentic Self by Dr. Thema Bryant: https://bookshop.org/p/books/homecoming-healing-trauma-to-reclaim-your-authentic-self-thema-bryant/20204100?ean=9780593418321&next=t The Homecoming Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-homecoming-podcast-with-dr-thema/id1471604689 Dr. Thema’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.thema/ Tricia Hershey’s The Nap Ministry (Healing via the REST IS RESISTANCE framework): https://thenapministry.wordpress.com/about/ Managing Back to School Stress on MasterClass: http://masterclass.com/backtoschool Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: http://pesi.com/dralexandra Continue the conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon: Ask a question! Submit your relationship challenge: https://form.jotform.com/212295995939274 Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day: https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530 Cultivate connection by subscribing to Dr. Alexandra’s newsletter: https://dralexandrasolomon.com/subscribe/ Learn more on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/

The fourth and final mailbag episode of the summer is here! Check out Dr. Alexandra’s advice for three listeners with three relationship dilemmas related to infidelity and rebuilding trust, both relationally and within themselves. Our first listener question concerns shame upon discovering an extramarital affair. Our second question deals with jealousy in the wake of some boundary-breaching behaviour that is impacting the relationship. And our third question is from an affair partner who is struggling with honesty and clarity within the affair from her married partner. Listen to hear Dr. Alexandra’s guidance and submit your own question by following the link below. “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Can I Trust You Again? E-Course: https://courses.dralexandrasolomon.com/can-i-trust-you-again-rebuilding-after-betrayal-or-deceit Reimagining Love Episode, When Shame Blocks Repair Reimagining Love Episode, When You’re the Affair Partner Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Dr. Alexandra sits down with Case Kenny – creator, mindfulness expert, host of the podcast New Mindset, Who Dis? and author of That’s Bold of You and The Opposite of Settling: How to Get Everything You Want Out of Love and Life Without Losing Your Spark – to discuss how societal “shoulds” around dating and relationships can create rigid expectations and fear-based decisions. Instead, they invite us to lean into curiosity, optimism, and self-awareness to get what we want out of love and dating. Together, they dive into: peak-end rule And so much more! “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra The Opposite of Settling: How to Get Everything You Want Out of Love and Life Without Losing Your Spark by Case Kenny Instagram @case.kenny Learn more about Case Kenny: https://www.casekenny.com/ Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Submit a Listener Question

First-generation children of immigrants often struggle with bicultural straddling, impacting their sense of identity, their mental health, their priorities and values, and their relationships. They can also find it difficult to be understood and loved by their parents in a way they can truly feel. Dr. Alexandra is joined by Sahaj Kaur Kohli, founder of Brown Girl Therapy and author of But What Will People Say: Navigating Mental Health, Identity, Love and Family Between Cultures to discuss how we can develop more capacity to love across differences and make shifts within ourselves to change our relationships for the better. You will come away from this conversation with: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra But What Will People Say: Navigating Mental Health, Identity, Love and Family Between Cultures by Sahaj Kaur Kohli Brown Girl Therapy Instagram Culturally Enough Substack Learn more about Sahaj Kaur Kohli Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Submit a Listener Question

When grappling with aspects of ourselves that we deem less good, less productive or less loveable, it may be tempting to completely write those parts off, or to hide them away in shame. Today’s guest, Britt Frank, sits down with Dr. Alexandra to make a compelling case for why it is essential to use the power of parts work to embrace these aspects of ourselves so that we can make better sense of the full range of the human experience and show up more fully in our important relationships. You will come away from this episode with: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Align Your Mind: Tame Your Inner Critic and Make Peace with Your Shadow Using the Power of Parts Work by Britt Frank Learn more about Britt Frank at https://www.brittfrank.com/ Reimagining Love Episode, Finding The “Self”: Exploring Family Systems Therapy With Dr. Richard C. Schwartz Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day

Welcome to R&R: Revisit & Reflect, a new episode format here on the podcast. We’re living in a time of information abundance (sometimes information overload) and lots of that information is about mental health and relational health! But there’s a difference between consuming content and integrating it. When we consume, the information might just pass through us, whereas when we integrate, the information weaves its way into our unique story or situation, creating insight and the potential for a shift in mindset, in emotion, in belief, and in behavior. With these R&R episodes, you’ll reflect and journal with Dr. Alexandra to integrate core lessons from the podcast, continuing with today’s conversation from the archive with the esteemed Drs. John & Julie Gottman. The Gottmans share some of the most groundbreaking findings to ever come out of their Love Lab and discuss with Dr. Alexandra the relationship principle of “Small Things Often.” So, get out your favorite pen and journal and join in this summer reflection. You’ll come away from this episode with: Journaling Prompts: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Welcome to another summer mailbag episode, in which Dr. Alexandra digs into recent listener questions so that we can all grow, together. Two of the questions today follow a general shape of a question that comes across Dr. Alexandra’s desk quite often. Something like: “Everything’s perfect in my relationship…BUT….” There’s some challenge, incompatibility, or roadblock that feels outside of our control—or, something within *US* that’s holding us back from taking things to the next level, even though everything feels so right—and we can’t get unstuck. Dr. Alexandra speaks to two listeners in this spot, as well as answering a unique question from a listener who is wanting to reclaim a special place for herself and her daughter, a place that holds both “pain and potential,” in her words, in the wake of the end of her marriage. Listen to hear Dr. Alexandra’s tips on how she can reclaim her paradise. “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Take the Family of Origin Roles QUIZ Previous summer mailbag episodes: Mailbag 1, Mailbag 2 Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Sex isn't always easy to talk about, but today, you're going to hear from someone who is bringing the sexy back to sex ed. Dr. Alexandra is joined by Shan Boodram, a sexuality educator and certified sexologist, known for her work on Netflix’s Too Hot To Handle, The Marriage Pact on The Roku Channel, and Ex-Rated on Peacock, as well as her MasterClass, “The Art of Seduction,” which leads folks through the fundamentals of flirting, intimacy, and how to foster deep physical and emotional connections. Shan’s approach to sex education is welcoming and approachable, and she has a reverence for this topic that is oh-so central to our humanity and aliveness. From re-defining the way we draw wisdom from the ancient Kama Sutra text, to even designing jewelry that encourages folks to reclaim their pleasure in the bedroom, Shan & this conversation will inspire you to see your and your partner’s sexuality with fresh eyes. And if you’re looking for practical advice on the art of seduction, you’ll get that in this episode, too (enter Shan’s iconic “sexy eye triangle” tip). There’s so much to glean from this episode, whether you’re looking to spice things up with your partner in the bedroom, move past sexual shame, or just see sex in a new way. You’ll come away from this episode with: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra “The Art of Seduction on MasterClass: masterclass.com/shan Käma, Shan's jewelry collaboration with Surmeyi Shan’s website LOVERS by shan, Shan’s podcast Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Dr. Alexandra sits down with author and speaker Jennifer Pastiloff for a heartfelt conversation centered on vulnerability, new beginnings, and embracing joy through trying times. Jen’s candid sharing of her personal journey reminds us that we're constantly given opportunities to evolve ourselves, heal, and step more deeply into our authenticity. Jen and Dr. Alexandra also discuss navigating the "messy middle" after a breakup or divorce, and how we can begin again in life after facing bumps in the road. Jen's new book, Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life, is out today and explores all of these topics and many more. You'll come away from this episode with: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life by Jennifer Pastiloff Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Welcome to R&R: Revisit & Reflect, a new episode format here on the podcast. We’re living in a time of information abundance (sometimes information overload) and lots of that information is about mental health and relational health! But there’s a difference between consuming content and integrating it. When we consume, the information might just pass through us, whereas when we integrate, the information weaves its way into our unique story or situation, creating insight and the potential for a shift in mindset, in emotion, in belief, and in behavior. With these R&R episodes, you’ll reflect and journal with Dr. Alexandra to integrate core lessons from the podcast, starting with today’s conversation from the archive with the inimitable relationship expert Esther Perel. They explore relational ambivalence and how to reignite the spark inside your relationship, and within yourself, inspired by a listener’s question. So, get out your favorite pen and journal and join in this summer reflection. You’ll come away from this episode with: Journaling Prompts: “Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

The second mailbag episode of the summer is here! Hear Dr. Alexandra’s advice for three listeners from around the world, with three relationship dilemmas: the first is a fellow “Alexandra” who lives in England and is struggling with her blended family. Next, we hear from a listener in Hawaii who is trying to make a difficult decision about their relationship. Finally, Dr. Alexandra answers a question from a listener in the UK who is ready to have a baby…but her boyfriend is not. Listen to hear Dr. Alexandra’s guidance and submit your own question by following the link below. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

If you’re ready to empower yourself to step into your true purpose but are paralyzed by fear, what-ifs, and imposter syndrome, you’ve found the right conversation. Today’s guest is Shannon Watts, the founder of Moms Demand Action, the nation’s largest grassroots group fighting gun violence in the U.S. Like many of us, Shannon was left outraged and broken after hearing news stories about school shootings and seeing the impact of gun violence on communities across the countries. One night, her sadness transformed to rage, and her life was changed after a Facebook post kicked off what would become Moms Demand Action, a movement of Americans fighting for public safety measures that can protect people from gun violence. They work to pass stronger gun laws and work to close the loopholes that jeopardize the safety of families and communities. They know that gun violence is preventable, and they are committed to doing what it takes to keep families safe. Shannon has been named one of TIME’s 100 Most Influential People, a Forbes 50 over 50 Changemaker, and a Glamour Woman of the Year. She’s also someone who went through an extraordinary transformation, and this is the focus of her and Dr. Alexandra’s conversation, and of her new book, Fired Up: How to Turn Your Spark into a Flame and Come Alive at Any Age. Shannon empowers folks to break free from limits, trust their instincts, and lead with passion to create meaningful change. Shannon and Dr. Alexandra talk about activism and the way it impacts relationships, particularly marriage, and Shannon shares how her own marriage evolved as she went through this incredible unfolding. Relevant Links "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Fired Up How to Turn Your Spark into a Flame and Come Alive at Any Age by Shannon Watts Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

We are all connected to folks with disabilities, whether they’re part of our inner circle, or members of our broader community. Unfortunately, there’s a great deal of stigmatization, misunderstanding, and judgement that crops up around disabled folks and their families. Parents of disabled children are traveling on a different path than other parents, and often need more support, but the people around them don’t always know how to provide it. Therapist Amanda Griffith-Atkins joins Dr. Alexandra on this episode to offer guidance to those parents, as well as the people around them. When Amanda’s son Asher was born, she discovered her life's purpose: to help parents of children with disabilities find their stride. She has become a leading expert in helping parents of kids with special needs navigate their emotions, relationships, and parenting, and her book, How to Handle More Than You Can Handle: Caring for Yourself While Raising a Disabled Child, is out in the world today. Amanda and Dr. Alexandra discuss parenting as well as the experience of partners who are raising a disabled child together and what this journey can bring up for couples. There’s so much goodness in this conversation for everyone, whether this is a new topic for you or one that’s near and dear to your heart. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit How to Handle More Than You Can Handle: Caring for Yourself While Raising a Disabled Child by Amanda Griffith-Atkins Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Throughout the summer, Dr. Alexandra will be answering listener questions through Mailbag Episodes. Today’s questions include a query from a listener in Los Angeles who is struggling with her feelings about a choice the guy she’s seeing has made, and isn’t sure how to proceed after a tricky conversation. Next, you’ll hear from Marina in London, who wants some extra support in the aftermath of infidelity. She’s curious about post-traumatic growth and what might be possible for her. Dr. Alexandra wraps things up with a question from a listener in New York, whose boyfriend of over a decade is ambivalent about the relationship and blowing hot and cold. Should she cut loose or stick it out until he makes up his mind? Listen to hear Dr. Alexandra’s takes on all of these relationship situations. If you want to submit your own question, click the link below. You may just get yours answered on an upcoming mailbag episode this summer! "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

When family members or friends hold views that we oppose, we can feel stuck. These days, polarization is everywhere, both in our culture at large and within familial and intimate relationships. So often, conversations online feel like a zero-sum game. At the same time, most of us want to live in a world where we can have thoughtful, nuanced conversations with people we don’t see eye to eye with on every issue. In her book, Do You Still Talk to Grandma? When the Problematic People in Our Lives Are the Ones We Love, speaker and teacher Brit Barron offers us a way forward that goes beyond the black and white thinking that’s so characteristic of this time, while also emphasizing the importance of holding fast to our personal boundaries and values. In this conversation, Dr. Alexandra and Brit discuss reminders and a roadmap for cultivating curiosity, humility, and openness, which are essential when it comes to connecting with loved ones we disagree with. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Do You Still Talk to Grandma? When the Problematic People in Our Lives Are the Ones We Love by Brit Barron Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

Connection, both with others and with oneself, really is the answer to so many of life’s woes. We know that investing in our relationships helps us become happier, healthier, and more fulfilled. Dr. Adam Dorsay, author of the book Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love, walks us through this straightforward but vital idea in this episode: that the antidote to the uniquely modern angst so much of us experience today is connection. Sounds simple, right? Well, not always, when there are so many pulls on our attention and shiny goals to strive towards. Dr. Alexandra talks with Dr. Adam about how connection isn’t just about spending time with others, but so much more than that—an emotional state of aliveness and vitality. Dr. Adam Dorsay is a licensed psychologist and executive coach in Silicon Valley, where he works with high-achieving adults. He is also a resiliency expert and co-creator of an international program for Facebook’s Online Safety employees. In this episode, you’ll learn why so many high-achieving folks feel unfulfilled, even when they seem to have everything at their fingertips. You’ll also get pointers from Dr. Alexandra and Dr. Adam about how to prioritize connection in your life, which will lead to more happiness, stability, and gratitude. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love by Dr. Adam Dorsay Dr. Adam’s podcast, SuperPsyched Dr. Adam’s Tedx Talks: Friendships in Adulthood: 5 Things to Know | Emotions: The Data Men Miss Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

When there’s a struggling person in a family, the system often coalesces around that individual, and while we might imagine these patterns get left behind when kids grow into adults, the dynamic often endures for the long run. Reimagining Love listener Cristina wrote in to Dr. Alexandra from Chicago, asking about how to better handle the challenges of such a situation. She’s the only one in her family who is in therapy, and she is eager to disrupt the dynamic. Cristina wants to stay connected to her sisters, despite the challenges they’ve faced, and her hope is to break longstanding patterns of over-accommodation and resentment while honoring her own needs as well as other family members’. Dr. Alexandra dives into this question with the goal of exploring an empowering therapeutic truth: that when you change your own dance moves, you can transform the entire system. If you’re dealing with something similar, this episode is going to offer you ways forward you may not have experimented yet, that could have the potential to change everything. If you’d like to submit a listener question of your own, you can do so by following the link below. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question

In the age of modern technology, we have more information about each other than ever before. Sharing locations with our loved ones can make life more convenient, and while at first glance it may seem like a small decision, the choice to share or not to share actually encapsulates so many of the values and tensions that couples face—questions of closeness and privacy, trust and betrayal, safety and mystery. And if you’ve ever had tense conversations around sharing your location using apps like Find My Friends, Life360, or Snap Maps, Dr. Alexandra is going to help you understand why this topic carries more weight than we might realize, and how to navigate through it and make decisions about location-sharing with your partner. "Your Anxiety Toolkit" on MasterClass: www.masterclass.com/youranxietytoolkit Technology Safety & Privacy: A Toolkit for Survivors: Safety Net Project Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter Submit a Listener Question