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Episode 46: Making Your Offering

Dr. Hanson and Forrest bring the strength of Aspiration to a close with an episode dedicated framing our actions as offerings to others. The Foundations of Well Being: Timestamps: 0:25: What does it mean to make your offering? 4:05: How does making your offering support aspiration generally? 5:45: Two blocks to aspiration. 8:45: How making your offering simplifies relationships. 10:10: Finding fertile ground. 13:45: Being wise around...


Episode 45: Aspiration Without Attachment

Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore how we can "aspire without attachment;" dreaming big dreams and pursuing them with commitment, while also being at peace with whatever happens. 0:40: What does “aspiring without attachment” mean? 2:45: Why is it a good thing to aspire without attachment? 7:55: Process vs. outcome goals. 10:35: Re-framing what “winning” looks like. 15:00: Accepting the reality of negative outcomes. 16:45: “Failure” as part of a process. 18:45: The power of big goals. 20:30:...


Episode 44: Honoring Your Dreams

Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore how we can learn from and bring to life our childhood dreams - a key part of Aspiration. Timestamps: 1:15: Why is aspiration a key strength? 3:30: Why are childhood dreams important? 6:15: Viewing the world without assumptions. 10:15: Aspiring toward ends rather than means. 14:15: Being conscious of the impact of other people. 20:20: How the “dreaded experience” stops us from aspiring. 24:00: Love, work, and play. 29:15: Including talents and values in your...


Episode 43: Aspiration with Dan Siegel

Today we’re beginning a new strength, Aspiration, with a conversation between Dr. Hanson and Dr. Dan Siegel. During this episode, Dr. Siegel will explain how you can use “mindsight" to tap into the dreams you had as a child, and honor those aspirations as an adult. This interview is also a part of the Foundations of Well-Being online program. If you'd like to learn more about the Foundations of Well Being: Timestamps: 1:15: Interview...


Episode 42: Repairing Relationships

At even the best of times, our relationships require a natural process of correction – let’s call it repair – to clear up little misunderstandings and ease points of friction. Doing that skillfully is the focus of today's episode. Timestamps: 1:15: What are the common things that require repair? 3:25: The problem of resisting repair. 9:00: Checking our attributions and understandings. 15:30: Negotiating relevant values. 17:40: Know that your needs matter. 20:50: Expressing your needs...


Episode 41: How to Assert Yourself Effectively

Relationships go smoothly when everyone wants the same things. But how common is that? On this episode, Forrest and Dr. Hanson continue the strength of Courage by exploring how we can assert ourselves effectively. Timestamps: 1:15: Why do people struggle to assert themselves effectively? 3:10: Setting the stage for asserting yourself. 8:45: Keeping your eyes on the prize. 11:50: Commenting on process. 16:10: Focusing on the future. 18:15: What would it look like if you got what you wanted?...


Episode 40: Speaking from the Heart

Think about the weight of what’s been unsaid in your relationships. What have the effects been on you and other people? Today we’ll explore how to express those undelivered communications, and "speak from the heart" with kindness and skill. Timestamps: 1:25: What do you mean by speaking from the heart? 3:00: What do we gain by speaking from the heart? 5:10: Speaking the positive as well as the negative. 6:20: The different dangers in speaking from the heart. 8:00: Establishing safety. 11:45:...


Episode 39: Managing Undependability

We have a natural desire to trust a reliable world - but life happens, and no person or organization is perfectly dependable. So we have to learn how to manage that natural undependability, which is the focus of this episode. The Foundations of Well-Being Program: Timestamps: 2:00: Our expectations of dependability. 5:00: The undependability of experience. 7:30: The inevitability of disappointment. 12:30: Centering amidst disappointment....


Episode 38: Unilateral Virtue

Whether at home or at work, it’s easy to spend more time dwelling on the faults of others than reflecting on the room for improvement in oneself. Unilateral virtue is what we draw upon when we focus on our own side of the street. Timestamps: 1:10: Where does unilateral virtue come from? 3:15: Being virtuous without becoming a doormat. 7:20: Fulfilling expectations and creating a framework of trust. 12:20: Doing things out of the kindness of our heart. 14:50: How can we establish our personal...


Episode 37: Growing Compassion and Kindness

Dr. Hanson and Forrest discuss why it’s so important to our intimate relationships to warm the heart, and develop greater compassion and kindness as personal traits. Timestamps: 0:45: The less obvious reasons to be compassionate and kind. 5:00: The difference between compassion and kindness. 9:00: Loving at will. 11:30: Ways we can increase our capacity for compassion and kindness. 14:00: Respecting the boundaries of others. 16:30: Compassion and kindness while maintaining clear...


Episode 36: Empathy

Dr. Hanson and Forrest continue their discussion of Intimacy by focusing on building empathy, which allows us to tune into and understand other people. Timestamps: 0:30: Why do we need to be empathic in order to be intimate? 1:50: Where does empathy come from biologically? 5:15: Summary of the three ways we can show empathy. 5:50: Is empathy a trait that can be developed? 8:15: Sustaining your attention to other people. 10:35: Letting yourself be truly affected by another person. 12:30:...


Episode 35: Intimacy and Autonomy

Dr. Hanson and Forrest begin a new strength, Intimacy, with a discussion focused on how to balance two seemingly conflicting goals: maintaining our independence from other people while also forging emotionally intimate relationships with them. Timestamps: 1:40: How does intimacy support autonomy? 3:50: What does appropriate autonomy look like? 5:30: How does autonomy support intimacy? 8:50: The importance of choice. 10:25: Is there a biological basis for preferences for intimacy or autonomy?...


Episode 34: Pursuing Your Goals

On this unique episode, Forrest interviews Dr. Hanson about his personal story of motivation – including how to transform from someone who lacks a natural feeling of motivation to someone who can diligently pursue their goals. 2:00: Learning how to naturally motivate yourself. 5:00: Valuing your unique gifts. 6:30: Adding up an extra two hours. 8:30: Sustaining motivation through a long day. 11:45: Reducing the friction in your life. 14:10: The importance of taking decisive action. 17:00:...


Episode 33: Motivating Yourself

We all have things we know would be good to do, but it’s hard to do them. On this episode, Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest focus on a key aspect of motivation: how we can incline our minds to break bad habits, and want the things that are good for it. 0:40: Why doesn’t just knowing that something is bad stop us from doing it? 2:55: How does motivation work biologically? 7:00: The importance of connecting good behaviors to direct rewards. 8:50: Becoming good at imagining rewards. 12:40:...


Episode 32: Passion and Stress

On this episode, Dr. Hanson and Forrest continue the strength of Motivation by exploring how we can use healthy passion without falling victim to unhealthy righteousness, anger, and stress. Timestamps: 1:00: What’s the relationship between stress and passion? 3:50: Applying positive vs. negative emotion. 6:30: Why passion and “revving up” makes you vulnerable to stress. 11:30: Why can things BE great but FEEL wearing? 15:00: “Faking” passion, and the influence of culture. 17:20: Learning how...


Episode 31: Like Without Wanting

On this episode, Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest begin the strength of Motivation with an episode that explores how we can pursue our goals with passion and purpose, without becoming painfully attached to them. Timestamps: 1:20: Why are liking and wanting different? 4:45: What causes us to tip from liking into wanting? 8:25: If liking is good and wanting is bad, why is it so easy to tip into wanting? 12:30: Forrest’s experience with video games. 16:45: Addiction and moments of lucidity. 19:10:...


Episode 30: 7 Ways Past Anger

Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest conclude the strength of Calm with an episode dedicated to exploring seven ways we can work with anger skillfully. 0:35: Understanding the costs of anger 3:05: Never speaking or acting from anger 6:15: Reducing the priming for our anger 7:00: Reacting in proportion 10:00: Avoiding the habit of irritability 14:20: The tendency of fault-finding 16:30: The pitfalls of various kinds of talent 18:10: The story of the two monks 21:30: Know our near-enemies 24:30: The...


Episode 29: Injustice and Anger

Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest talk about managing one of our most difficult emotions: anger. Specifically, they focus on how we can distinguish between skillful and unskillful anger, particularly relating to issues of social justice. 1:15: The physical costs of anger. 3:40: The interpersonal costs of anger. 5:15: How can we remove the costs of anger without turning into a doormat? 11:00: Finding the line between skillful and unskillful anger. 18:00: Using anger to find our deeper wants and...


Episode 28: How to Feel Safer

Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest discuss how we can fight back against fear and learn to feel safer. They explore ways to reduce anxiety, identify resources, and deal with the real challenges of life. 0:30: What causes fear? 2:30: Feeling reasonable safety. 7:15: Anxiety in the body. 9:00: Identifying the resources we have to fight threats. 12:30: How can we feel safer during REAL threats? 14:25: The importance of growing resting-state resources. 16:25: Three ways to deal with immediate threats....


Episode 27: Avoiding Needless Fear

On today’s episode of the Being Well Podcast, Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest discuss how to manage and reduce a particular kind of fear: paper tiger paranoia. This fear is characterized by needless anxiety that comes from the brain’s creation of imaginary threats. 1:00: What does “paper tiger paranoia” mean? 3:25: How do “tigers” appear in the modern day? 4:45: Why paper tigers crowd out real ones. 6:20: Hidden costs of paper tiger paranoia. 8:20: The insidiousness of fear. 11:00: Recognizing...