Ruff Cuts

Merry Christmas! I know you asked for dog adventures with the Dogateers Timmy, but how would you like a Christmas movie with Dean Cain instead???? You were a bad kid, Timmy.

Special guest and Hokuto No Ken enjoyer Tie tuesday joins us for the 1995 live action adaptation. Why is Chris Penn here? Where is Ken's wife? Are we already dead? Is Jackal the best boy, or whippit Nosferatu? Time to find out!

And the incredibly confused podcast. We learn the lifecycle of clowns, how to prevent a heart attack (downing a full bottle of pills), what a snipe looks like, and absolutely nothing about a dog. How does this keep happening? Put a dog in your dog movies!

Boyks dredges up a VHS tape from the depths of Disney hell and straps Ilyon down to learn the lore of the mysterious sixth Airbuddy. Get ready buddyheads, for the not-at-all exciting answer.

There's no bunny, no puppy, and forget about Easter. It's another David DeCouteau masterpiece!

Boyks and Ilyon stumble across pirate gold sapphires dollar store glass beads in the form of R.A.D.A.R. the bionic dog. Pirates, cyborgs, mad scientists, and corrupt mayors abound and somehow it's all unwatchable. Time to walk the plank.

Ilyon's back from vacation and it's a wild ride, as this week we plunge the dark depths of the American dream and try to get to the bottom of who's scamming who. Boyks fills up his corkboard to try to find the key to money laundering, and a little girl searches for the American Dream - time with family (spelled: M-O-N-E-Y

Today, the boys look at Rottweiler, a Terminator-inspired Breaking Benjamin-ass hardcore exploitation movie. It's ruff alright.

Jim Carrey carries his career out of the way of made-for-TV Ace Ventura 3, leaving it in the capable hands of the voice of Air Buddy Budderball. Get your Hawaiian shirts and pompadours ready to kick some cops, race some heelys, and fart to save the animals.

He's the maaaaaaaaaaaaaan! But not a dog - Boyks shares a classic B-movie with co-host Ilyon anyway. So download this to your DAMN TALKING BOX and enjoy

A sensitive, powerful, Christian take on a single-parent home, torn apart by war and the one big jackass that farts his way into their hearts; Kevin Sorbo.

Down the most toxic beer you can find, turn on the nitrous in your car, find a dog, and punch a cop in his sunglasses - it's Highway to Hell

Please? Pleeeeeaase? Just a whiff? A little treat? C'mon. Welcome to wholesome Christian family movies, starring Jesus' 13th psychic immortal dog apostle.

Boyks and Ilyon stumble on a pit as dark as the depths of Uranus!! (canned laughter). FamilyEntertainment.tv AKA - WowNow, Doc TV, Pup TV, Dream Machine Animation, Toe Jamz, and Brainy Pants presents a steaming pile of shit generated in an afternoon specifically to trick parents into accidentally buying it. Please don't give them money and fame and make them TheAsylum 2. Please, please. We're begging.

Hey look it's the second Pup Star movie! Hold on, I'm being handed a note... OH FUCK, THIS IS THE FOURTH??? THEY MADE FOUR?

It's a classic tale of man meets dog, man kills dog, man cyberizes dog, man hooks up with dog's mom! Welcome to Ruff Cuts

Special guest Kobuddy joins us for a Christmas special! Boyks received the gift of a DVD monster dog; a movie that has been removed everywhere else we looked. We get to find out if it's a Christmas miracle or a real monster mutt.

The boys are haunted by a spirit of Christmas past, when the director of Santa's Summer Home returns with Christmas Spirit; the story of an Eldritch Christmas Milf and her B&E expert. Strap in.

Would you like to business film business to maximize your earning potential? We can hook you up with a distributor and Richard Karn so you can repackage your bad family dog movie into a worse "adult-themed" Christmas "comedy". Time to business.

It's that most wonderful time of the year! When Ilyon forgets to look at the production company for the second week in a row and we're forced to watch an Asylum film about dogs pissin' Happy holidays to all who celebrate!