A Way Beyond the Rainbow

In the podcast finale, we take a look at the entire journey across all five seasons and reflect on key take-home messages and memorable words from my guests and co-hosts. We wrap up with acknowledgments, a dedication, and final words and prayers. Link to A Way Beyond the Rainbow book Background music used in the episode: (0:39-4:14) Now We Are Free (theme from Gladiator), 2CELLOS (4:14-7:39) River Flows in You, Yiruma (7:39-13:51) Adagio in G Minor (Albinoni), HAUSER with the Zagreb Philharmonic Orchestra (13:51-17:21) The Lonely Shepherd (Georghe Zamfir and James Last), HAUSER with the London Symphony Orchestra (17:22-23:04) My Heart Will Go On (theme from Titanic by James Horner), 2CELLOS (23:05-31:00) A Way of Life (theme from The Last Samurai), Hans Zimmer (31:01-33:53) Once Upon a Time in the West (Ennio Morricone), HAUSER (33:54-37:31) Tennessee (theme from Pearl Harbor), Hans Zimmer (37:32-39:28) La Valse d'Amélie (Version orchestre), Yann Tiersen (39:28-44:26) Never Too Late, Yanni (44:27-48:56) Playing by Heart, Yanni (48:57-51:45) House of Cards, Audiomachine (51:54-57:45) Guardians at the Gate, Audiomachine (extended) (57:46-1:01:12) Song of the Caged Bird, Lindsey Stirling (1:01:13-1:07:29) Farewell - In His Purest Form, Yanni (1:07:30-1:10:23) Breath and Life, Audiomachine (extended) (1:10:24-1:13:07) Above and Beyond, Audiomachine (1:13:08-1:17:07) In the Mirror, Yanni (1:17:08-1:20:04) Almost a Whisper (Seléna's Theme), Yanni (1:20:45-1:25:20) Chopin's Nocturne in C Sharp Minor (Frédéric Chopin), HAUSER with the London Symphony Orchestra (1:25:25-1:28:41) Mia and Sebastian's Theme (theme from La La Land by Justin Hurwitz), HAUSER with the Zagreb Philharmonic Orchestra (1:28:43-1:31:31) Valerie (theme from V for Vendetta), Dario Marianelli

A blooper reel featuring many of the out-takes with my co-hosts, Amina and Aadam, that didn't make it to the final cut.

This episode is a discussion with Imam Dawud Walid on the current challenges facing imams, chaplains and community leaders given the current global pro-LGBT socio-political climate, and how we, as Muslim communities, can help our imams and community leaders navigate these challenges so they can, in turn, effectively help their communities. What are some of the struggles that imams and community leaders face in their mosques and communities as far as issues related to same-sex attractions or gender dysphoria? Why are imams scattered when it comes to these matters and not unified in their stance? What is the "jurisdiction" of imams and community leaders in that regard, and what is out of their league? How can we support our imams, chaplains and community leaders as we pave our way together amidst all of these challenges? These and other questions are explored in this episode. Imam Dawud Walid's books: - Towards Sacred Activism - Blackness and Islam - Centering Black Narrative: Black Muslim Nobles Among the Early Pious Muslims - Centering Black Narrative: Ahl al-Bayt, Blackness & Africa

This episode is a discussion with Br. Yahya Van Rooy on the current challenges facing teachers, educators and school administrators given the LGBT paradigm, and how Muslims parents and teachers can navigate them together. How can we provide the Muslim youth with firm footing so as not to be swayed by modern media and pop culture? How can we help students navigate challenges with regards to the LGBT narrative within their own schools? How can we support teachers and parents navigate those challenges? How do we, as fellow students, teachers and staff members, deal with students "coming out" in our schools? What resources are available for Muslim teachers and educators? These and other questions are explored in this episode. Resources mentioned in the episode: - ISLA course outline "Addressing LGBTQ issues in our schools and communities" (with resource links) - Working Towards Principles on Islamic Sexual Ethics (slideshow) - Religious Schools and Colleges Guidance for Same Sex Issues, Sample and Model Policies from the Christian Legal Society

This is part II of a two-episode series with Dr. Ty Mansfield and his wife Danielle where we talk about their personal experience with their mixed-orientation marriage. In this episode, we dive deep into spiritual themes, as well as how we can support men and women experiencing SSA or GD in our communities. How important is recognizing one's Divine purpose in our individual and collective journeys? What can Muslims learn from the Mormon experience in providing appropriate safe spaces and support systems for men and women experiencing SSA or GD? What are ongoing projects that we can help support and learn from? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. References mentioned in the episode: - North Star International - Voices of Hope project - Voices of Hope: Latter-Day Saint Perspectives on Same Gender Attraction- An Anthology of Gospel Teachings and Personal Essays - In Quiet Desperation: Understanding The Challenge Of Same-gender Attraction - Voices of Hope podcast

This is part I of a two-episode series with Dr. Ty Mansfield and his wife Danielle where we talk about their personal experience with their mixed-orientation marriage. In this episode, we explore Ty and Danielle's personal journeys, how far Ty has come with his own journey of healing and growth, as well as Danielle’s perspective as a wife of a man who experiences SSA. We talk about spirituality and God's love, vulnerability, intimacy and growth. What are the challenges of going into a mixed-orientation marriage, and how can we navigate that? How can we cultivate more intimacy in this marriage context? How do we deal with other people's assumptions and judgments? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode.

This episode is dedicated to current and potential spouses of individuals experiencing gender nonconformity, same-sex attractions and/or gender dysphoria. In this episode, I read out survey responses sent by members of the online Straight Struggle community addressing current and potential spouses, and we discuss pertinent themes for spouses and answer frequently-asked questions. Why didn't he/she inform me before marriage and wait until now? Will he/she ever change? How do I deal with other people's opinions and judgments, particularly those coming from family? How do I deal with my insecurity and jealousy from my husband seeing other men or being with them, even though I know that there’s nothing sexual or intimate going on? I discovered my spouse has a porn and masturbation addiction, or he’s sexually acting out and has a sex addiction, what should I do? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. References used and resources mentioned in this episode: - Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen International support systems for family members (including spouses): - Straight Struggle support group (online, Muslim-based, international) - Strong Support's "Spouses Support Circle" (Muslim-based, UK and international) - Positive Approaches To Healthy Sexuality (PATHS) - Brothers Road (US and international), including resources for wives, "A Woman Who Loves" (retreat), "A Woman's Heart" (coaching), relevant Facebook groups, and webinar - North Star Alliance (Mormon-based, international), including Voices of Hope and Journeys of Faith Relevant articles: - ‘What I Wish My Wife Understood About My Same-Sex Attraction’: What Men Say - ‘What I Wish My Husband Understood About How His Same-Sex Attraction Affects Me’: What Women Say For porn and sexual compulsive behaviors: - Counseling services: Sexual Recovery Institute, Purify Your Gaze (Muslim organization), Life Star Network, Bethesda Workshops - Information for Spouses and Partners of Sex Addicts - Other helpful resources: Sexaholics Anonymous (SA), NoFap (main website, Reddit “NoFap” forum, Reddit "Muslim NoFap" forum) - Coffee With Karim podcast episode 59: "My Spouse has a Pornography Addiction" with guest speaker Zeyad Ramadan

This is part IV of a 4-episode series dedicated to parents and family members of individuals experiencing gender nonconformity, same-sex attractions (SSA) and/or gender dysphoria (GD). In this episode, Aadam and I wrap up the discussion on healing with the topic of community healing, and then we answer frequently-asked questions from parents and family members of individuals experiencing SSA or GD. How important are therapists and mentors in the healing journey, and what are their responsibilities? Will my child ever "change"? If my child or sibling invites me to read their pro-LGBT material or attend their meetings, should I do that? How can I help my child overcome his/her porn habits and unwanted sexual behaviors? My son or daughter is having a gay wedding, should I attend? These and other questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen - A Parent's Guide To Preventing Homosexuality by Joseph Nicolosi and Linda Ames Nicolosi

This is part III of a 4-episode series dedicated to parents and family members of individuals experiencing gender nonconformity, same-sex attractions (SSA) and/or gender dysphoria (GD). In this episode, Aadam and I discuss practical tips and advice for parents and families of individuals experiencing SSA and GD, and we tackle proper communication skills and conflict resolution techniques. To what extent are time, touch and talk important in the lives of children, adolescents and young adults, and how can I offer that? How and why should the same-sex parent become more invested and the opposite-sex parent take two steps back? If my son is rejecting me, how can I, as a father, rebuild my relationship with him? Why are hands-on activities, sports and physical roughhousing necessary in the lives of boys and men, and how can we invite them to participate in these activities? How do we know if what we're doing is right and the level of intervention is appropriate? If I am a single mom or a single dad, how can I best guarantee the proper gender development of my opposite-sex child? How can I improve my communication skills with my child, resolve conflicts with them and learn more about their love language? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen - A Parent's Guide To Preventing Homosexuality by Joseph Nicolosi and Linda Ames Nicolosi Other references mentioned in the episode: - Scene from the movie, Good Will Hunting - The Five Love Languages book by Dr. Gary Chapman - The Five Love Languages Quiz - "Knowing Your Child's Love Language" - summary document

This is part II of a 4-episode series dedicated to parents and family members of individuals experiencing gender nonconformity, same-sex attractions (SSA) and/or gender dysphoria (GD). In this episode, Aadam and I discuss the notions of gender confusion in childhood and highlight important considerations for parents dealing with young boys and girls as well as adolescents experiencing gender nonconformity, SSA and/or GD. What are signs that my child or family member is experiencing gender identity confusion? What are some possible causes for this? When should I be worried? How can I replace cross-gender toys and clothes to which my child is attached with more gender-affirming toys and clothes without hurting his/her feelings? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen - A Parent's Guide To Preventing Homosexuality by Joseph Nicolosi and Linda Ames Nicolosi

This is part I of a 4-episode series dedicated to parents and family members of individuals experiencing gender nonconformity, same-sex attractions (SSA) and/or gender dysphoria (GD). In this episode, Aadam and I read out survey responses sent by members of the online Straight Struggle community addressing parents and siblings, and we cover pertinent themes related to personal healing for parents and family members. What do men and women experiencing SSA or GD hope to get from their parents and family members? How can I, as a parent, sibling or family member of an individual with SSA or GD, navigate the "shock factor"? How can I step into their world and see things from their eyes? What does "unconditional love" mean, and can I still love them unconditionally while disagreeing with their behaviors and lifestyle choices? Why is doing my own work necessary before I help my child, sibling or family member who experiences SSA or GD? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen - A Parent's Guide To Preventing Homosexuality by Joseph Nicolosi and Linda Ames Nicolosi International support systems for parents and family members: - Straight Struggle support group (online, Muslim-based, international) - Strong Support's "Parent's Support Circle" (Muslim-based, UK and international) - Positive Approaches To Healthy Sexuality (PATHS) - Brothers Road (US and international) - North Star Alliance (Mormon-based, international), including Voices of Hope and Journeys of Faith - Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays (PFOX) - Focus on the Family, Jeff Johnston (Christian-based) - Courage International (Christian-based) Healing seminars and family healing sessions: - Positive Approaches To Healthy Sexuality (PATHS) - Mankind Project (MKP) - Adventure into Manhood (AIM) - Brothers Road (US and international) - Woman Within - COR Experience: Noble Man and Women's Immersion Weekend - Celebration of Being - for men and for women

This is part II of a 2-episode series with Sh. Mustafa Umar addressing Shar'i perspectives related to gender nonconformity, gender dysphoria and transgenderism. Is gender transitioning unconditionally prohibited in Islam or are there particular exceptions? How do we, as families and communities, deal with individuals undergoing gender transitioning? How do we deal with individuals who identify as gender non-binary or gender-fluid, particularly if they are Muslim? How do we deal with situations where we have to "declare our preferred pronouns"? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode.

This is part I of a 2-episode series with Sh. Mustafa Umar addressing Shar'i perspectives related to gender nonconformity, gender dysphoria and transgenderism. Are the gender roles defined by Islam rigid or flexible compared to modern Western notions of gender roles? If gender roles are, to a degree, socially determined, what are the permissible limits of not conforming to such gender roles? Where do individuals who identify as gender-fluid or gender non-binary fit in the Islamic paradigm? For individuals who imitate the opposite gender, what does imitation involve and what would be considered blameworthy? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode.

In this episode, Br. Mobeen Vaid and I discuss the Islamic perspectives on gender-reassignment surgeries as well as the ripple effects of the modern day transgender movement. What are the major Islamic fatawa regarding sex-reassignment surgeries within Sunni and Shi'a Islam? On what grounds were such fatwas issued to begin with? Do communities like the Hijras in Pakistan and Bangladesh as well as the Warias in Indonesia represent legitimate "third gender" communities? What are the ripple effects of the modern trans movement on family units, schools and academia, Muslim scholarship, as well as our mosques and places of worship? These and other questions are explored in this episode. References used and resources mentioned in this episode: - “And the Male Is Not like the Female”: Sunni Islam and Gender Nonconformity (Part 2) by Mobeen Vaid and Waheed Jensen - When Harry Became Sally: Responding to the Transgender Moment by Ryan Anderson - Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters by Abigail Shrier - The Man Who Would Be Queen: The Science of Gender-Bending and Transsexualism by Michael Bailey - 4thWaveNow website

In this episode, we dive deep into the topics of gender dysphoria and transgenderism from scientific and medical perspectives, by exploring the most recent research and developments on the topic. Are there biological factors that contribute to transgenderism? Is gender dysphoria one entity or are there different kinds of it? What is the genesis of gender dysphoria and how is it treated nowadays? Is the “affirmative model” healthy and appropriate for individuals struggling with gender dysphoria? These and other questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - “And the Male Is Not like the Female”: Sunni Islam and Gender Nonconformity (Part 2) by Mobeen Vaid and Waheed Jensen (references for medical articles included therein) - Time to Hit Pause on 'Pausing' Puberty in Gender-Dysphoric Youth - Transgender Docs Warn About Gender-Affirmative Care for Youth - Sex Change Regret Support groups and relevant resources: - International: Genspect, Partners for Ethical Care, Parents of ROGD Kids, Our Duty, Gender Identity Challenge Scandinavia (GENID) - USA: 4thWaveNow, Child and Parental Rights Campaign - UK: Bayswater Support Group, Transgender Trend, Safe School Alliance UK, Fair Play for Women - Canada: Canadian Gender Report, Detrans Canada Detrans support groups: Reddit detrans server, Post Trans, Detrans Voices, Lost in Transition, Pique Resilience Project

In this episode, we continue our discussion of gender nonconformity with Br. Mobeen Vaid, and we discuss the notions of gender atypical individuals from an Islamic perspective, as well as the concepts of intersex/disorders of sexual development from a medical perspective. What are the differences between al-khunthā al-mushkil (ambiguous khunthā), al-mukhannath al-khilqī (congenital mukhannath) and al-mukhannath ghayr al-khilqī (affected or non-congenital mukhannath)? Does khunthā represent a third gender? To what extent does Islam accommodate gender atypical individuals and guarantee their legal rights under Shari'a? Who is the verse in the Qur'an about "men who possess no sexual desire for women" referring to exactly? Biologically and medically speaking, how do intersex syndromes arise and how can they be treated? These and other questions are explored in this episode. References used in this episode: - “And the Male Is Not like the Female”: Sunni Islam and Gender Nonconformity (Part 1) by Mobeen Vaid - “And the Male Is Not like the Female”: Sunni Islam and Gender Nonconformity (Part 2) by Mobeen Vaid and Waheed Jensen Extra resources: - Intersex Society of North America - official website - Support and advocacy groups for intersex individuals - here and here

With this episode, we begin a series of episodes addressing the topics of gender, gender nonconformity, gender dysphoria and transgenderism. In this episode, Br. Mobeen Vaid joins me in a discussion on gender and gender nonconformity in the modern world and from an Islamic legal perspective. Why are we witnessing an explosion of gender and sexual identities nowadays, and where is this expansion heading? Does Islam have a constructionist or essentialist view when it comes to one's gender? Does Islamic Shari'a allow flexibility in terms of our gender expression, or are we limited to strict and predefined “gender roles”? Does Islam allow for leeway in non-typical interests and pursuits for men and women? These and other questions are explored in this episode. References mentioned in the episode: - “And the Male Is Not like the Female”: Sunni Islam and Gender Nonconformity (Part 2) Relevant writings by Br. Mobeen: - On Openness - Men, Women, and the Perils of Constructionism - On Gender Wars, #Metoo, and Building a Program of Virtue and Dignity - Appraising Motherhood - On Muslim Masculinity - Why Marriage Requires Meaning

This is part II of a 2-episode series with Sh. Mustafa Umar addressing contemporary issues and Shar'i perspectives related to same-sex attractions and gender identity issues. Is Islam a "homophobic" or "transphobic" religion? Where do we, as Muslim communities, stand on "LGBT rights" and same-sex marriage? Is it permissible for me to attend a same-sex marriage? How do we deal with "progressive" or "reformist" Muslims pushing pro-LGBT agendas on our communities? How do we deal with Muslim reverts who identify as part of the LGBT community? How do we deal with particular workplace rules and regulations that are pro-LGBT and may be in direct contradiction with our Islamic values? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode.

This is part I of a 2-episode series with Sh. Mustafa Umar addressing contemporary issues and Shar'i perspectives related to same-sex attractions and gender identity issues. How can parents, family members and friends support and embrace individuals with same-sex attractions and/or gender dysphoria without compromising their values and Deen? How do we deal with men or women in our families/circle of friends who have "come out" as part of the LGBT community and are living the lifestyle? From an Islamic legal perspective, what are the punishments of same-sex sexual behaviors and some of the common misconceptions surrounding that? Do same-sex sexual acts, the declaration of such acts as halal, or being in a same-sex marriage put one out of the fold of Islam? These and other relevant questions are explored in this episode. Talks given by Sh. Mustafa Umar: - Islam and Homosexuality: Drawing the Lines - What Does Islam Really Say About Homosexuality? - Teaching Transgender Ideology In California Schools: What Muslims Need to Know

This is part II of a 2-episode series with Br. Mobeen Vaid addressing revisionist arguments pertaining to homosexuality within Islam. In this episode, Mobeen and I discuss the punishments of sodomy according to Islamic Shari'a, to what extent Islam can be considered a "sex positive" religion, as well as the notions of marriage and celibacy for men and women who experience same-sex attractions. Under what conditions is sodomy punished by Islamic law, and why is there no consensus on this matter? Since a lot of homoerotic prose and poetry were written during the Islamic Golden Age, and we also know of famous Islamic scholars from the past, like Ibn Dāwūd al-Ẓāhirī, Ibn ʿArabī, and Ibn Ḥazm who had homoerotic feelings, wouldn't all of this constitute an acknowledgment and acceptance of homosexuality? Is it fair or just that Islam denies men and women who experience same-sex attractions their rights to sexual fulfillment? These and other questions are explored in this episode. Resources used and references mentioned in the episode: - "Can Islam Accommodate Homosexual Acts? Quranic Revisionism and the Case of Scott Kugle" by Mobeen Vaid