Time To Talk TFMR

Hello and welcome to this episode talking to four women and their experiences of TFMR just before and after the fall of Roe vs. Wade. Roe vs. Wade was the five-decade old supreme court decision to uphold a woman’s right to obtain an abortion. In June 2022, the supreme court overturned this decision, sending abortion rights and access across the United States into a crisis. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR. Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello, and welcome to the start of Season 9! We're kicking it off with an epsiode about exercise. It's something that a few of you have asked for over the years, and to be honest, I've always felt mixed about. In a society that tells mothers to 'bounce back' after full-term, live births - the pressure for bereaved mothers can be crushing. Thankfully, we have Casey to talk to us about healthy re-engagement with fitness and how to look after your post-partum body. Casey is passionate about core and pelvic floor health, any exercise you do should consider these aspects of your physiology. Some terms used: Diastasis - When the muscles of the abdomen separate during or after pregnancy. Pelvic Floor - Several muscle, ligaments and fascia attached to your pelvis. Damaged/weakened pelvic floor muscles can lead to incontinence (leaking wee or poo). Prolapse - Pelvic organ prolapse is when 1 or more of the organs in the pelvis slip down from their normal position and bulge into the vagina. It can be the womb (uterus), bowel, bladder or top of the vagina. We hope you enjoy this episode and get some good advice and support in how to go about healthy fitness. You can find Casey on Instagram @twopeaswellness and her website can be found here. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello, and Happy New Year! In today's episode I am speaking with Dr Rachel Foggin from BPAS (British Pregnancy Advisory Service) about surgical termination. Many of you wrote in with your questions about surgical termination and we tried to get as many of these answered as we could. This is a very open, honest and frank conversation about what surgical termination in the U.K., and we are very grateful to Rachel for sharing her expertise with us. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Thank you for joining us today. In this episode, Nick Embleton (consultant neonatologist) joins me as co-host for this episode talking to a group of Fathers about men's grief after TFMR. The Fathers joining us are Brian, Kenneth, Justin. They are all joining us from the USA and Canada and all have experienced TFMR due to foetal anomaly. RTZ Hope is spoken about in this episode and they can be found here: https://rtzhope.org/ This is the third and final episode in our series talking to father's about their grief and experiences. If you liked this, you may also want to listen to: Episode 45: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2082264/12845792-tfmr-fathers-uk.mp3?download=true Episode 48: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2082264/13777297-tfmr-fathers-maternal-health.mp3?download=true Episode 31: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2082264/11678036-tfmr-a-father-s-grief-with-rasmus-ilso.mp3?download=true I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

In today's episode, I'm speaking with Jane Fisher, the Director of Antenatal Results and Choices (ARC). It's ARC's 35th anniversary this year and we thought it's be a good idea to hear from Jane about ARC's history, why it was created, how and by whom. I also wanted to hear about what has been most present for ARC in our most recent times and where they are headed for the future. Jane is a very dynamic charity Director. I don't think there are many that happily (eagerly) man the helplines! And this is what makes ARC so special to us TFMR mothers and fathers. It is having a dedicated charity organisation that has the ability to not only understand the nuanced complexities of what this devasting experience of pregnancy/baby loss is like for parents, but also how to communicate this to the wider public in a compassionate and truthful way. This is a special charity, doing much good, not just for parents, but in also providing training and information for healthcare professionals too. We also talk a bit about how ARC supports HCPs and is at the forefront of research into various aspects of TFMR. We hope this gives you a good overview of ARC and how it is there to support you. Even those outside of the U.K. are able to access their specialist support. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Today joining me to talk about pregnancy after loss is Natasha Williams. Natasha is a highly experienced CBT and EMDR trained Psychotherapist, who has over 20 years’ experience of working with women and their partners. She specialises in working with women who have experienced fertility issues and pregnancy loss, and she is a member of the Parenthood in Mind team. I asked Natasha your questions about the difficulties of pregnancy after loss for TFMR, and she shares her knowledge of anxiety and trauma with us. If you liked this episode, why not have a listen to have a listen to Natasha’s colleague and founder of Parenthood in Mind, psychotherapist Julianne Boutaleb talking about trying to conceive in episode 44, or episode 38 where I discuss genetic counselling with Dagmar Tapon and ARC’s Jane Fisher. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

In today's episode, I'm talking with two dad's who have gone through the experience of TFMR due to their partner's health. Avi from Western Canada and Jack from the UK join me, and my visiting co-host, Consultant Neonatologist, Nick Embleton, discussing what it has been like for them trying to support their wives while also grieving at the same time. This is the second in our series talking to father's about their grief and experiences. Episode 45 is the first in this series with my co-host Nick, speaking to four dad's from the UK. We also have Episode 31 with Rasmus, who gives a raw and heartfelt account of his experience. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Alannah Ross, from We Seek Care, joins me in today's episode talking about returning to work after having a TFMR. Alannah had an abortion nine years ago and found she struggled both physically, mentally and emotionally afterwards. Feeling unsupported in her own recovery, she set about setting up We Seek Care, a platform focussed on aftercare. Originally, Alannah thought Seek would support individual women and partners, but she soon found she had businesses knocking on her door. We discuss what women need from their employers after a TFMR, how to approach your manager and what you can do if you feel you can't speak with your employer. Alannah offers a free 15min phone call to help you work out what you may need and how you can speak with your employer. Seek offers aftercare plans and 1:1 coaching that you can access, even if your employer doesn't have a pregnancy loss policy in place. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Welcome to today's episode: TFMR for a T21 (Down Syndrome) diagnosis with Emma Parsons. Emma had her TFMR in 2009. After having her 20 week anatomy scan, she was informed there was a high chance her son, Isaac, had T21. This was later confirmed by further genetic testing. Emma talks to us about her decision making process, how she felt quite lonely, the effect on her mental health and how her grief has evolved over time. She is very open and honest, and we know that many mums out there who have been dealt this particular TFMR card will resonate with much of what Emma has to say about her experience. We hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Welcome to today's episode: TFMR Fathers. I'm so grateful that four dads were willing to come and speak with us. I also had an awesome guest co-host this episode, consultant neonatologist Nick Embleton. Our four dads are: Alex, Ethan, Sam and John All are base here in the UK and all went through termination due to foetal anomaly. They were all amazingly open and honest about their experiences, how they were impacted, what support they received and what they felt was needed, not just for them, but for their partners as well. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello, and welcome to today's episode. I’m joined by Julianne Boutaleb of Parenthood in Mind. Julianne is a Chartered perinatal psychologist, with over 20 years in the NHS and private practise. We’re discussing trying to conceive after TFMR – but also stopping TTC after TFMR. This is a really good follow on episode from our Sex and Intimacy after TFMR that was released a few weeks ago. Julianne mentions a few places to get extra support from, including: Tommy Pregnancy Hub Maternal OCD Org. and of course you can find more information at Parenthood in Mind. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello and welcome! In today's episode I'm speaking with Suzie Heaney. Suzie is a midwife and holds a Phd from Queen's University Belfast. She carried out research (called The Bluebell Study) looking into the healthcare needs of women and families going through TFMR (specifically termination for fetal anomaly) in Northern Ireland and Ireland. We know that the laws surrounding terminations/abortions have changed in both of these countries recently, to allow access to essential healthcare. But how have these changes impacted women going through terminations for fetal anomalies? Suzie is also ARC's coordinator in NI. Suzie shares the results of her research, both for parents and for healthcare professional. You can email Suzie at s.heaney@qub.ac.uk for more information about her study, or future work in this area. You can also contact her about ARC's support in NI. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

In today's episode, I'm speaking with Karen Burgess from Petal's Baby Loss Counselling Charity and Sally Kelly, a specialist midwife in bereavement care, about returning to sex and/or intimacy after a TFMR. It's such an important topic...and we just don't talk about it - me included! We talk about how to connect with each other again - because the trauma and grief explodes the relationship in many ways, for many people. Communication is key, being honest with each other, which can feel very very difficult when you are already at your most vulnerable. Thank you to Karen and Sally for tackling this subject with me, and thank you to all you listeners who sent in a comment or question for this episode. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello, and welcome to the start of season 7! Today I'm speaking with Tracy Gilmore-Nimoy. Tracy is a psychotherapist based in California, USA. She had her own 3rd trimester TFMR three years ago. The difficult labour ended up seeing Tracy haemorrhage, the resulting physical trauma of interventions to save her life has meant she's been left with Asherman's Syndrome (scarring of the uterus). Tracy has unfortunately had a further miscarriage from a spontaneous pregnancy, and then a further miscarriage after trying IVF. She shares a bit about her experiences and how she's dealing and coping with secondary infertility. You can find her on Instagram @TGNtherapy and her website can be found here. I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello and welcome to our last episode of 2022. I'm speaking with Suzie Jay Goldsmith, photographer, mentor, author and mum. Suzie had two TFMRs , and after her second one, she decided to write a book exploring how creativity can help us navigate our grieving process and ease trauma. The Rallying Cry is part autobiography, part research and part workbook. Christmas is a difficult time of year for anyone who's grieving. Really, this episode could be listened to for any time there's a big cultural celebration that brings families, friends and communities together, as it's at these times that we are made keenly aware of who isn't here. TFMR is baby loss and a traumatic loss. Often, especially in the early stages of our grief, trauma is present in the form of high-anxiety and/or PTSD. Research shows that creativity in any form helps to regulate our central nervous system. As does acts of kindness, practising gratitude (not to be confused with 'positive thinking') and being in nature. This episode is packed full of ideas on how to help ease your pain, from ideas for acts of kindness to including your baby in your Christmas traditions; to incorporating creativity and setting boundaries to give yourself the space you need. You can find the link to Aching Arms (mentioned in the episode) here. And if you're interested in learning more about Suzie's iPhone Magic course, find it here. I really enjoyed this chat with Suzie, I hope you enjoy listening. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

In today's episode I'm talking with two women, Rachel and Georgia, about their TFMRs for maternal health reasons. Rachel had a TFMR due to preeclampsia and HELLP syndrome and Georgia experienced an 'eccentric' pregnancy and Asherman's Syndrome which put her at serious risk of uterine abruption. This year, we featured TFMR for maternal health reasons during baby loss awareness. I learnt from speaking to many of you that it can feel that your experience isn’t valued in the same way, or that you aren't included within the TFMR community in the same way. Let me say right now, you belong here. We all have individual experiences, and no path is easy, they are just different. My hope with this podcast is that we can shed light on these different paths within the TFMR community and show each other empathy, compassion and support. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello! In today's episode, we're talking with Dagmar Tapon, a genetic counsellor and Jane Fisher, Director of Antenatal Results and Choices, about genetic counselling. We talk about the technical stuff, like the difference between genes and chromosomes, the limits to testing, options for future pregnancies, the emotional and mental load that both testing and coping can bring...and much more. Dagmar mentions the HFEA as a resource for statics about IVF in the UK: Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority gives impartial, accurate information about IVF, clinics and other fertility treatments from the UK government fertility regulator: https://www.hfea.gov.uk/ Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486.

Hello, and welcome to today's episode. Our guest is Mara Clarke. Mara is an abortion activist, mum and disabled woman. She founded Abortion Support Network which supports those who need to travel for an abortion from across Europe. We discuss Channel 4's documentary titled Disability and Abortion: The Hardest Choice, aired at the end of the summer. Does ending a pregnancy due to detected fetal abnormality amount to disability discrimination? No, of course not. Once again, this is a case of trying to simplify a complex and nuanced situation. Mara and I then get into deeper conversations about abortion, what it means to be pro-choice, how TFMR intersects with all of this, etc, etc. It's a rich and fast moving conversation, hold on to your seats folks! And I will say, listen to your instincts about whether to listen to this episode or not. I am very aware of what the word abortion can bring up for TFMR parents, and we use it a lot in this episode. You can find Mara on Instagram @mara.k.clarke and Abortion Support Network @abortionsupportnetwork If you do listen, get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486. We've added a Patron account to the podcast. We'd be so grateful if you'd consider supporting the podcast with a monthly donation. Pledges start at only $1 per month. Head to our Podbean page and click on the 'Become a Patron' button at the top right to learn more.

Hello! And welcome to Season 6! Today's episode is all about how our friends can support us through TFMR and beyond. We're really grateful to Jess and Atiya for coming on and discussing their experience so openly. This is a really moving episode about how friendship can be such a powerful support for those facing this terrible loss. Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486. We've added a Patron account to the podcast. We'd be so grateful if you'd consider supporting the podcast with a monthly donation. Pledges start at only $1 per month. Head to our Podbean page and click on the 'Become a Patron' button at the top right to learn more.

Today we're speaking with Lucy Livesey again, all about well-being, including mindfulness meditation, for those going through baby loss. Lucy is a mental health nurse, hypnobirthing instructor, mindfulness teacher. She and her husband Rick lost their daughter, Ellie, in a TFMR a few years ago. After her experience, she went on to develop the Ellie's Gift App as a resource for others to help them through the birth of a baby they know has died, or will die. The app has been developed in conjunction with the NHS. It has just had a new launch with more features. Lucy is dedicated to making sure this app keeps on being updated and added to. You can find the app from Apple and Android now. Lucy also runs a specific mindfulness and grief courses, all free to use. She also runs baby loss sharing circles - again free. She tells us about all the different resources she's offering, from the app to her sharing circles. What they are, how they work and why they can help. And the Japanese art form of repairing broken pottery with liquid gold is called...Kintsugi (you'll just have to listen to the episode to find out why we're talking about this!). Get in touch and let us know what you think. Social media: Instagram and Facebook @TimeToTalkTFMR and Twitter @TalkTFMR Email is TalkTFMR@yahoo.com This episode is supported by Antenatal Results and Choices. For more information on how they support women and couples click here or call them on 0207 713 7486. We've added a Patron account to the podcast. We'd be so grateful if you'd consider supporting the podcast with a monthly donation. Pledges start at only $1 per month. Head to our Podbean page and click on the 'Become a Patron' button at the top right to learn more.