Sex for Saints

Initiating sex is really important in your relationship, but it can also be really hard. Because of societal norms, we sometimes think that men should always initiate because women should be more passive in bed. This can lead to resentment, especially when he is always being rejected. Now, I’m not saying that women always need to initiate sex or always say yes, but I am saying that talking about it is key. So, in this episode, let’s talk about how initiating sex can be a burden, but it doesn’t have to be.

Sexual Resentment is a complex emotion where we feel our needs are not being met in one way or another. If we take a step back and look at the stories that we are telling ourselves about our spouse and their inability to meet our needs, we can see that those stories are simply not true. They are not serving us well and in fact are eroding our connection and trust in our marriage. So, how do you change that narrative you’ve been telling yourself about why your spouse isn’t meeting your needs? Let’s talk about it. McArthur Krishna's Books: Cherish - Vol 1 Cherish - Vol 2 A Girl’s Guide to Heavenly Mother A Boy’s Guide to Heavenly Mother

For the last couple of episodes, we’ve been talking about the different levels of sex. So, in this episode, we’re going to talk about the pinnacle of marital intimacy - Level 3 Sex. I’ll explain all about what Level 3 Sex is, why couples would aspire to reach it, and how both partners can contribute to this sacred and transformative journey. This is the destination that I want for every couple! Listen in as I explain the why’s and how’s of Level 3 Sex.

In the last podcast, we talked about Level 1 Sex, what it is, and what we can do about it. So, in this podcast, we are talking about Level 2 Sex, what it is and why you’d want to level up your sex life. Level 2 Sex is not the end of your sexual journey, but rather part of the journey. It’s the zone where you’re not quite at the peak of desire, but you’re certainly not in the valley of disinterest either. It’s like standing at the edge of a pool, dipping your toe in, but not fully diving in just yet. Are you ready to level up your sex life to Level 2? Listen in! And don’t miss the next podcast all about Level 3 Sex!

In this episode, we’re diving into a topic that might resonate with many of you - Level 1 Sex. What is it? What isn’t it? And most importantly, how can we move towards a more fulfilling experience in our intimate relationships? I’ll answer these questions and more as we discuss how each partner might contribute to Level 1 Sex and why it’s hard to break out of it. There is better sex out there my friends! It starts with a willingness to change. So let’s start today!

Sexual disappointment is a complex emotion. Whenever we have expectations and those expectations aren’t being met, it’s natural to be disappointed. But what really matters is how we deal with that disappointment. Do we pretend we’re fine? Do we get angry? Do we avoid the emotion? Or do we talk about it? We are surrounded by examples of what a ‘real’ sexual experience should look like, but they aren’t reality. Having desires and fantasies is wonderful, but once we let in the expectations, that’s where disappointment comes from. Let’s talk about what we can do to overcome the sexual disappointment in our relationships that’s causing us to be disconnected from our spouse.

When asked, “Are you using your wife for sex?”, most men would say, "Absolutely not”! But is that true? Many men use their wives for sex without even realizing they are doing it. They don’t do it maliciously, but that doesn’t mean they don’t do it. In this episode, let’s talk about what it means to use your wife for sex, why you do it, and how to change that habit. This episode is for men and women who want to break out of a sexual habit that isn’t getting you the connection you need or want in your relationship.

In this episode, let’s talk about one of the most powerful tools in your relationship toolbox - relational listening. What is relational listening? It’s more than hearing, it’s understanding. So, how do you use it in conversations? Let’s talk about that! Listen to this episode to know what to do before, during, and after having a relational conversation with your spouse. Learn how to create a safe space for both of you to express your desires, fears, and fantasies so that you can have that fulfilling sexual relationship you’ve always wanted.

Sexual desire is much more complex than many of us are led to believe. Desire is multifaceted and must be examined from a biological, psychological, and sociological standpoint. Why do I talk about desire so often? Because a lack of desire is the number one thing that women come to me for help with. They tell me that their desire has just disappeared and they have no idea where it’s gone. So, let’s dive into what goes into desire and maybe how to get it back.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what we all want in our relationships and what that means to our relationships. So, today I’m going to share with you the four things that we all want in our sexual relationships. We may call them different things, but everyone wants essentially the same thing. I am also going to talk about what happens when these things we want aren’t happening in our sexual relationships. And what you can do about that. You see, the absence of these foundational values can lead to a host of challenges that impact both the marital and sexual aspects of a relationship. Let’s see what we can do about that!

I am so excited for you to hear this interview with Dr. Kelly Casperson. We talk about what you and your partner need to know about women’s hormones. We as women don’t get a lot of information about hormones in general but especially during perimenopause and menopause. Even if you’re not quite there yet, you are going to want to listen to what Dr. Kelly has to say because we will all go through this! This is an episode you are going to want to share with all of the women in your life. Dr. Kelly Casperson is a urologic surgeon, author, sex educator, and top international podcaster whose mission is empowering women to live their best love lives. She combines education, humor, and candor in her podcast, You Are Not Broken, where she dismantles the myths people have learned and normalizes healthy, enjoyable sex worth desiring. For more information, follow Dr. Kelly on Instagram (@kellycaspersonmd), or visit kellycaspersonmd.com.

I know that some of us, both men and women, feel that female-centric sex is selfish. But it absolutely is not! Let’s talk about why women may not want to transition to a female-centric approach to sex and why men might not want to as well. But when it comes down to it, a female-centric approach to sex can be a transformative journey for couples, deepening their intimacy, connection, and satisfaction. Want to learn how? Listen in!

At first thought, money and sex may not seem to have a lot in common. But if you think about it, when you improve something about your relationship, it often extends to all of your relationship. That’s why I asked Ruth Liebel to join me on the podcast to talk about money. Ruth is an amazing financial coach that will help you see that we often come into our marriages with different ideas of what it means to be “good” with money. Listen to get some clarity about how you manage your money in your marriage, and how improving that part of your relationship will improve your sexual relationship as well. Ruth Liebel (Lee-bull) is a financial coach who teaches Christians how to make decisions with their resources that improve their quality of life and support their values. She specializes in helping couples get on the same page, and in creating healthy boundaries around money. Too many lives, marriages, and families are short-changed, even destroyed, by financial chaos. The solutions to so many financial problems are simple and can become commonplace in our homes. Ruth got her bachelor’s degree in family finance (debt free) and did her practicum in financial counseling. She has worked with domestic violence shelters, HUD, Head Start, churches, and non-profit organizations. She is a certified YNAB Budget Coach, completed Ramsey Solutions Master. Coach Training, and was a Ramsey Preferred Coach the first two years of her coaching business. Ruth is madly in love with her husband of 17 years, and the biggest fan of her four kids. Her husband came from a very different financial culture than her, and it has been a long, diligent process to create a financial theology and plan that satisfies them both. She knows "good debt" does NOT feel good; vulnerability is scary; healthy boundaries are the difference between joy and hell; and having somewhere safe to process your thoughts and options is a total game-changer. She absolutely loves her life now, and loves helping people create a life they love as well. You can find her: At her website: www.ruthliebelcoaching.com On Instagram: @ruthliebel And by emailing her: ruth@ruthliebelcoaching.com

Sex, intimacy, and personal growth are all tied together. And when your partner doesn’t want to grow sexually, but you do, it can cause a lot of conflict. It’s not uncommon to find yourself in a situation like this, so in this episode, I’m going to share with you three steps to take to understand the situation completely. I’ll even share with you what to say that may help the situation.

I recently was a guest on the Live Your Why podcast with Tammy Hill. I thought the episode was so good, I asked Tammy if I could share it with you as well. She was excited to share what we talked about with you too! So listen in as I share some parts of my story that you may not have heard yet, along with talking about what mature feminine sexuality is. And no, we’re not talking about seniors, but all of us. So, let’s talk about why we need mature feminine sexuality and how it actually helps us get closer to our Heavenly Parents. You’re going to love this episode!

Wow! Episode 300! I can hardly believe it! I remember nearly six years ago when I started this podcast that I could hardly imagine what 100 episodes would look like, let alone 300. So today's episode is a little different. I asked people to call or write in about an episode that was impactful for them. Join me as I share with you what they had to say.

Have you ever been on a road trip and heard the words, “Are we there yet?” That person is just focused on the destination, not the journey itself. The same thing happens in our sexual relationships when we just focus on climax. Our world places so much emphasis on instant gratification that it is easy to let that thought into the bedroom. Are we relishing in all of the minute details and interactions that can lay claim on our body and our heart or are we like the kids in the backseat who ask over and over “are we there yet?” In this episode, let’s take a look at how we focus on our sexual journey, rather than just the destination. I will share with you seven key elements that are crucial for every relationship and contribute to a fulfilling and meaningful experience.

I have had a lot of questions lately about how to safely have anal sex so I’m going to answer those questions here. Anal sex is often intriguing for many couples, and while there seems to be quite a bit of desire to do it from one or both partners, there’s often a reluctance, which is understandable. So whether you’re a curious individual or a couple looking to add something new to your repertoire, this episode will guide you through the ins and outs of anal pleasure, focusing on safety and enjoyment. Join me for this step by step guide. We are almost at episode 300 and I would love to do something a little bit different and special for this episode. I would love it if you were willing to call in and leave me a voice message with something that was particularly impactful for you. My goal is to have a few that I can air with Episode 300. Call 385-424-1032 This is a number that goes straight to voicemail, so you won’t be bothering me and can call anytime. You can leave your name or do it anonymously. Just share something that has been particularly impactful for you and if you can what Episode # and the title it was. It can be really short or a couple of minutes long. This would mean so much to me, so thank you! The deadline to submit this is Monday, January 15, 2024.

I want you to prioritize sex in the new year. I hear from clients all the time that they just don’t have time to have sex. That’s because you’re not making it a priority. Why have more sex? Because it helps you have a healthier and more fulfilling connection with your partner. Here are my practical tips on how to make sex a priority in the new year! You are going to LOVE number 7! We are almost at episode 300 and I would love to do something a little bit different and special for this episode. I would love it if you were willing to call in and leave me a voice message with something that was particularly impactful for you. My goal is to have a few that I can air with Episode 300. Call 385-424-1032 This is a number that goes straight to voicemail, so you won’t be bothering me and can call anytime. You can leave your name or do it anonymously. Just share something that has been particularly impactful for you and if you can what Episode # and the title it was. It can be really short or a couple of minutes long. This would mean so much to me, so thank you! The deadline to submit this is Monday, January 15, 2024.

We have often talked about spontaneous desire vs responsive desire on my podcast. But today, I want to go a little deeper into the responsibility you have if you happen to have responsive desire. Often women, and some men, have responsive desire, but that doesn’t mean that their partner is always in charge of initiating. You can have a high sex drive and even be the higher desire partner with responsive desire. Let me show you how!