Habits on Purpose

Anger is often seen as something to avoid or suppress, but what if I told you it's actually an emotion that can offer valuable insights? In this episode, we'll explore how to rethink your relationship with anger and use it as a powerful tool for growth and clarity. For many of us, anger is tied to shame or the belief that it's an emotion we should hide. However, when we embrace anger as a signal rather than a problem, it can alert us to boundary breaches, compromised values, or injustices. I'll explain how shifting your perspective on anger can transform your emotional landscape and help you make decisions aligned with your core values. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/213 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

When you think of trauma, do you picture only extreme, life-threatening events? In this episode, I expand the definition of trauma and explain why many high achievers unknowingly overlook their own experiences. Trauma isn't defined only by what happened, but by how your nervous system responded when you felt overwhelmed, powerless, or alone. I break down the difference between Big T and small t trauma and explain how stress and trauma exist on a continuum. Many of the habits we struggle with, like perfectionism, overachievement, hypervigilance, chronic worry, or emotional reactivity, may not be personality flaws but adaptive responses that once helped you cope. Understanding them with curiosity instead of judgment opens the door to healing and growth. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/212 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you take forever to make decisions, only to second-guess yourself once you finally choose? In this episode, I unpack why analysis paralysis feels so intense and how the belief that there is one right decision quietly fuels decision block, overthinking, procrastination, and chronic comparison. I offer a practical shift that makes decisiveness possible: letting go of the idea that there is one right choice and instead choosing to make your decision right. You'll learn a concrete process to identify what you would decide if you trusted yourself, uncover the inner objections that surface, and respond to those concerns with curiosity and compassion while still moving forward. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/211 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Curiosity gets a lot of praise, but not all curiosity actually leads to change. In this episode, I introduce the concept of pragmatic curiosity and explain why simply understanding yourself better isn't always enough to shift long-standing habits. I walk you through what true curiosity is and what it isn't, including how curiosity can quietly turn into judgment, fixing, or endless analysis. You'll also learn how to practice pragmatic curiosity by pairing insight with action so your self-awareness actually translates into real habit change. I share a simple framework you can use with any dilemma, pattern, or decision so that curiosity doesn't just stay in your head but helps you move forward in a concrete, supportive way. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/210 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

When you're feeling stuck, stressed, or overwhelmed, the right question can shift everything. In today's episode, I share a list of my favorite productive questions that help me get unstuck, tap into curiosity, and break free from confusion. These questions are the antidote to overthinking, indecision, and self-doubt. Our habitual thought patterns often keep us in a loop of stress and overwhelm, especially when we're not clear on what we really want or need. By asking the right questions, we can break out of that cycle and start finding clarity. The powerful questions I'm sharing today help me connect to my deeper needs, quiet my inner critic, and tap into my intuition when I'm feeling lost. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/209 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Most habits aren't random or self-sabotaging. They're signals. In this episode, I explore the deeper needs and desires hidden beneath your habits and why understanding those needs is one of the most overlooked keys to lasting habit change. When you only focus on stopping a behavior, you miss the reason it's there in the first place. I explain how habits like procrastination, self-criticism, people pleasing, numbing, overthinking, and comparison often develop as solutions to something deeper. You'll learn a simple three-step process to identify the need beneath any habit so you can address the root cause instead of fighting the symptom. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/208 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

We've all experienced the struggle of trying to figure out whether something is a "yes" or a "no." In this episode, I dive into how to discern the difference between what aligns with your core desires and values and what doesn't. You might think it's obvious, but in reality, it can be surprisingly tricky. The tension between saying yes when you really mean no — or vice versa — often stems from years of socialization, external expectations, and learned behaviors. The good news is, it's possible to regain clarity and trust your intuition again. I'll share why our ability to differentiate a true yes from a no becomes clouded over time, and how you can begin to tune back into your inner wisdom. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/207 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you automatically assume the best about people, or do you find yourself jumping to negative conclusions more often than you'd like? In this episode, I explore what happens when you deliberately practice giving the benefit of the doubt and make it a habit. You'll learn the ten specific things that shifted for me when I started practicing this habit, from taking things less personally to having better access to my intuition. You'll discover how giving others the benefit of the doubt actually helps you give it to yourself, quieting your inner critic and opening the door to self-compassion. And you'll hear why this practice can be a pivotal change in your energy, your mindset, and your experience of everyday life. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/206 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you feel pressure to set big goals and overhaul habits this time of year? What if the most important thing isn't what you do, but what you remember? In this episode, I'm sharing a list of reminders that I want to carry with me into the new year. These grounding truths can help settle you when you feel unsettled and guide you toward growth when it seems impossible. You'll discover why progress often feels uncomfortable before it looks like positive change. You'll learn that being regulated doesn't mean being calm, but rather being responsive while feeling fully. I'll also talk about why longstanding habits can shift faster than you think and how emotions carry important messages that are worth paying attention to, not pushing away. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/205 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

As we wrap up the year, it's the perfect time to reflect on some of the most impactful insights and tools shared on Habits On Purpose. In this special episode, I've compiled a collection of powerful moments from past episodes—reminders and strategies that have helped many of you throughout the year. As you listen, I invite you to reflect on how these tools and reminders resonate with you now, and how you can carry them forward into the new year. Whether you're looking for clarity, perspective, or a little more balance, this episode is a great way to reset and recharge for what's ahead. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/204 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

The holiday season often brings a lot of joy, but it also comes with its share of stress and obligations. In this episode, I explore a simple but powerful shift that can change how you experience the holidays: the difference between saying "I have to" and recognizing "I choose to." The habit of saying "I have to" can quickly take over during the holidays. You'll discover how recognizing your ability to choose is liberating, and how this simple shift can reduce stress and make holiday interactions lighter and more manageable. I'll guide you through practical examples of how to apply this shift to everything from family time and food choices to setting boundaries and saying no. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/203 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you ever feel like you become reactionary and out of control in an instant? In this episode, I explore the feeling of being reactive, particularly when it happens with the people you care about most. Reactivity can make you feel like you're no longer in control of your emotions, and the intensity of that reaction can feel overwhelming and insurmountable. Today, I'm introducing the concept of a mental and emotional U-turn, a tool that can help reduce reactivity and give you clarity about what's happening when you feel triggered. You'll learn how to recognize when you need to do a U-turn by paying attention to your emotions and physical sensations. I'll guide you through how to slow down in those heated moments and keep your focus inward rather than getting pulled back into the situation. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/202 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you bristle when things do not go according to plan? In this episode, we explore how the habit of trying to control everything becomes one of the biggest time wasters and energy drains in your life. When you pour effort into things that are not fully under your control, you lose time, and you exhaust your mental, emotional, and physical resources. Many of us do this without realizing it. Trying to manage other people's feelings, reactions, or interpretations drains our energy and leaves us feeling ineffective. I explore why the urge to overcontrol develops and what changes when you shift your attention to the small category of what is genuinely yours to manage, rather than the much larger category that is not. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/201 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

What if being undone, feeling big emotions, or even feeling overwhelmed is actually what healing looks like? Most of us have been taught that doing well means feeling calm, composed, and in control, but I want to make the case that falling apart might be a sign of your greatest emotional strength and a marker that you're at a meaningful growth edge. In this episode, I explore why emotional capacity, strength, resilience, and progress sometimes look messy. You'll discover why feeling big feelings isn't failure; it's often a sign of recovery. You'll learn how a regulated nervous system isn't defined by calm, but by responsiveness. And you'll understand why emotional intensity may mean your system is no longer in survival mode, but is expanding its capacity to hold more of your lived experience. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/200 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you ever find yourself reading too much into a situation and suddenly thinking everyone around you dislikes you? In this episode, I explore how the meanings we assign to everyday moments can shape our experience of life. These interpretations can either lift us up or weigh us down, often without us even realizing it. You'll discover how to identify your default meaning-making patterns and learn how to choose interpretations that work for you, not against you. I'll share specific prompts to help you reframe moments of struggle with compassion and curiosity, without falling into the trap of toxic positivity. By the end, you'll have tools to catch yourself in unhelpful narratives and experiment with meanings that support your growth. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/199 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Have you ever mapped out a perfect plan for change only to watch it fall apart within days? That cycle is not a discipline problem. It is a sign that the foundation beneath your habit change is missing the elements that make new patterns truly sustainable. Most people focus on the plan itself, not the internal and practical skills that allow a plan to hold up in real life. In this episode, I break down the most common mistakes I see when people try to change their habits and why those approaches backfire. You will lalso learn the four keys that create real progress. When you focus on these foundations, you build habits that work in the midst of unpredictability rather than collapsing under it. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/198 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Have you ever noticed how quickly you brush off something that was actually really hard? This instinct to minimize difficulty might seem harmless, but it shapes how connected you feel to yourself and how honestly you experience your life. In this episode, I explore the habit of minimizing difficulties: why we dismiss or dilute how challenging something was after it's over and how this pattern disconnects us from ourselves. Whether it's downplaying a tough day or pretending a painful experience was "fine," this habit can quietly erode self-trust and emotional awareness. You'll learn how to recognize when you're glossing over your real experience and what changes when you start telling the truth about what was hard. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/197 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Do you ever find yourself overwhelmed by an inner critic that constantly tells you you're not good enough, that you should be doing more, or that you'll never get it right? This inner narrative can be so persistent and familiar that it feels like it's just a part of who you are. But what if you could separate yourself from these critical thoughts and see them for what they really are: just thoughts? In today's episode, I'm teaching you the powerful concept of unblending. Unblending is the process of separating yourself from negative, critical thoughts or emotional states so that you can observe them objectively, rather than being swept up by them. We'll explore a simple exercise that helps you shift from being fully immersed in your inner critic to observing it with distance and clarity. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/196 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Why does inner work matter when so much of life's struggle seems to happen outside of you? It's easy to think the real problems are external—your workload, relationships, or circumstances—but neglecting your inner world limits your ability to handle those outer challenges effectively. In this episode, I explore how doing inner work builds the foundation for meaningful external change. You'll learn three reasons why self-understanding, awareness, and emotional honesty are not indulgent but essential for agency and resilience. You'll see how focusing inward helps you respond with clarity instead of reactivity, and why cultivating inner awareness allows you to meet life's demands from a grounded, intentional place. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/195 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/

Have you ever made a detailed plan to change everything at once, only to find yourself back where you started weeks later? Grand plans often look inspiring, but they rarely hold up in daily life. They demand more than what’s realistic for the season you’re in and leave no room for flexibility when life gets in the way. In this episode, I explore three key reasons why ambitious plans often fail and why starting small is the true key to sustainable change. You’ll learn how perfectionism, impatience, and the belief that small steps mean weakness keep you in cycles of all-or-nothing effort. I’ll share a simple, practical approach to goal-setting that helps you stay consistent and build trust with yourself over time. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://habitsonpurpose.com/194 Join the Habits on Purpose newsletter for extra tools, prompts, and stories between episodes: https://habitsonpurpose.com/