Transgender Woman Talking

In this week's installment, Elle talks about a recent tattoo she got commemorating her graduation from therapy school. In addition, she reflects on some of the history and conversation in and around body modifications, including the perjorative accusation of "mutilation". Elle references her tattoo artist, Adrianne Marcella, as well as the work that she got done on her forearm for her transition ceremony in 2022 (read more here). Please take a minute to send Elle an email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com to ask questions, make constructive suggestions, or name possible guests. To inquire about psychotherapy with Elle, please fill out a request form on her website at: www.estherloewen.com

On this episode, Elle brings back her book report format, exploring her reactions and thoughts about Taylor Jenkins Reid's masterful novel, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Among the themes included in this monologue are: reflections on allyship, the difficulty of being in the closet, how names and labels for the queer experience have changed over the years, the ways in which the dangers and societal expectations have shifted in even the last 70 years, the importance of feminism, and the fabulous and informative podcast "Bad Gays". Many thanks for tuning in to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com. If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

In this episode of the program, Elle talks about some of her understanding of religious trauma or spiritual abuse. As a former pastor and lifetime member of the Seventh-day Adventist Christian denomination, she resonates very strongly with many of the experiences folks identifying as victims of religious trauma describe. In the program, Elle also reflects on some of her understanding of trauma in general from a therapist's perspective, as well as some of the symptoms that people who have been hurt by religion go through. Some of the resources mentioned on the episode this week include: Sacred WoundsThe Body Keeps the Score"The Myth of NormalEMDR Trauma Therapytake the quiz here As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Nex Benedict was a 16 year old trans child who used he/him/they/them pronouns and lived in Oklahoma outside of Tulsa. Early in February, they were bullied to death in the girls bathroom at school. Before passing, video and text messages were captured from Nex reflecting on the experience of the fight that took his life and the years of harassment and bullying that led up to it. Many folks have been struck by his unjust and untimely passing - including bad actors and bigots like the head of Libs of TikTok who was recently appointed to an Oklahoma position overseeing library books. For most queer folks, however, Nex's killing evokes painful memories about our own traumas -- and the deaths of our queer siblings over the years including especially Matthew Shepherd, Brandon Teena, Brianna Ghey, the Q Nightclub Shooting, The Pulse, O'shae Sibley, and on and on and on. In this episode, Elle shares her feelings that come up after hearing of Nex's death -- as well as short recordings taken from the Vigil in her town. She finishes the episode with an invitation to take constructive action to push back against the hate. Some resources shared and mentioned on today's podcast include: Therapy with Elle"A Warped Version of the Bible Killed NEx Benedict"of Kevin GarciaJeffrey Marsh As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Elle talks about some recent experiences she's had with haters, and how she chose to respond. She reflects on some of the principles she's used in the past (and present) for shaping reactions, offering a matrix of priorities that may arrive in a variety of priorities depending on the situation. The themes and topics addressed in this episode include Nex Benedict's death, verbal and physical threats, intimidation, personal safety, blocking and deleting on social media, attending to self-respect, getting our needs met, fighting for justice, ghosting, reconciliation, forgiveness, intimacy, and leaving good reviews :) Thank you once again for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠ and click on "Therapy".

This week's show features an interview recorded some time ago with one of Elle's coworkers at the LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs, Bekki Lorton. They are a nonbinary person who shares their experiences on the path of self-discovery and self-love. In addition to doing community work at The Center, Bekki also worked with exotic animals in a zoo. Learn more about Bekki and their work here: https://thecentercv.org/en/about-us/our-people/bekki-lorton/ . If you have a story or insight relevant to the work of Transgender Woman Talking, and would be willing to sit for an interview, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. . To learn more about therapy with Elle, please visit her website at: ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠ and click on "Therapy".

This episode concludes (for now) Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This final episode again will work just fine on its own but will be best absorbed in the context of the previous six (linked below). In it, Elle talks about the Erin in the Morning's fabulous response to a transphobic hit piece published by the New York Times this last week. She also reflects on themes of intersex experiences, HRT as an experiment, the persistence of Gender Dysphoria over the years, and the collective weight of all the little "signs" along the way. If you have a story or insight relevant to the work of Transgender Woman Talking, and would be willing to sit for an interview, please reach out to Elle at the email address listed below. . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender-e1r3df3/a-a8tfsck Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-2-e1t0hp9/a-a94fg40 Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-3-e1v9592/a-a9c8939 Am I Transgender? (Part 4) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-4-e23bj4a/a-a9ouuq2 Am I Transgender? (Part 5) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-5-e26pv66 Am I Transgender (Part 6) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-6-e2a637f . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com with constructive feedback, questions, or connection :) To learn more about therapy with Elle, please visit her website at: www.estherloewen.com and click on "Therapy".

Elle this week reflects on the stress of existing as a trans person (and more generally a minority person) in the world today. She talks about the weight of discouragement and hopelessness that some trans people get covered by, and why it shows up for us. Among other themes, Elle recommends the work by Erin in the Morning who tracks anti transgender legislation in the United States (read with caution because the facts can be depressing). In addition, she references the concept of Minority Stress which is widely considered a significant stress factor by medical providers. She closes with some practical tips for managing the Impending Doom including a recommendation for those who are able to write your representatives (check out this guide). Elle has therapy openings available!! If you are in the State of California and looking for (or know someone who is) a therapist to work with on a virtual basis, please reach out. Elle is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT#142998), Supervised by Traci Lowenthal, PsyD (CA#22910). She currently accepts private pay only, but has a few sliding scale spots available for those who are in financial difficulty. As always, Elle welcomes your constructive feedback, questions, and friendly connection. Send your message to twatpodcasting@gmail.com.

In this episode, Elle reflects about a conversation she had with educators and medical providers at Loma Linda University, a Seventh-day Adventist college and hospital in southern california. The table talk itself was not recorded, but Elle brings her report before, immediately after, and in retrospect of what happened. What she had erroneously thought of as an interview or panel discussion prior turned out to be an intimate chat with a group of empathetic educators, many or most of whom were allies. The group is exploring a book published by Baker Academic, exploring four contrasting Christian theological interpretations of transgender identities (link to book). Warning, for people with religious trauma, and for transgender people from Christian backgrounds, this book features some incredibly hostile messaging that could be equated with hate speech. For this reason, Elle cannot recomend it, even though she resonated with Justin Sabia-Tanis' and Megan Defranza's contributions. Additional recommended resources on the intersection between Christianity and LGBTQ people include: Trans-Gender by Justin Sabia-TanisDazzling Darkness by Rachel MannTransforming by Austen HartkeTake Back The Word by Goss and WestTrans/Formations Bad Theology Kills by Kevin Garcia As always, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com with your constructive feedback and affirmations. Soon, Elle will be open for seeing clients looking for psychotherapy in the State of California. Stay tuned!

In this first episode of 2024, Elle interviews a fellow transgender sister, Wendy Cole. Wendy is a transition coach and elder in our community. She speaks about her experiences coming out of the closet as a child in the mid 20th century, what life was like for trans people in the 80s and 90s, and how things changed after 2012. Wendy's wisdom and kindness bleed through the whole episode, you're not going to want to miss this one! Learn more about Wendy Cole, and connect with her on her website: https://wendycolegtm.net/ She also was interviewed by the Huffington Post in the last couple years: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/gender-affirmation-surgery_n_5bb3a27be4b0d1ebe0e568f0 Wendy's story is resonant of some of the themes highlighted amongst transgender people in the FX Series Pose (link here). As always, reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com with your constructive criticism, questions, and future guests to interview.

Elle talks about the voices of doubt and self-hate and transphobia that rattle around in our heads -- where they may have come from, and how she navigates them in the present. She reflects on a conversation she once had with Rachel Freemon Sowers (of Road to Radical Visibility) about people's projections on us, in addition to her work in the therapy world. Among other themes, this program includes exploration of distorted thought patterns, DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy), CBT (cognitive Behavioral Therapy), and trauma work. Please reach out to Elle with ideas and constructive feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

For this week's episode, Elle shares a lecture she gave for SDA Kinship's 42nd annual Kampmeeting held in Riverside, California. Her lecture was given to a small audience of queer Christians in a hotel conference room. The lecture features her reflections on queer and chosen families, the imperfections amongst families, the ways in which we survive, and how to build thriving communities that can help us love well. Please reach out to Elle with your constructive feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

This week on the program, Elle interviews the founder and leader of Patchwork, a network of mutual support communities for and by transgender people. In the episode, Stephanie reflects on her own personal journey with gender, some of the key experiences that shaped her, and what she gives her heart and soul to today. In addition, she also discusses the importance of building networks of love for our survival as transgender people. Learn more about Stephanie's background in crisis support and emergency services, and how these skills have influenced the creation of Patchwork. https://www.transpatchwork.org/ As always, reach out to Elle with constructive questions or feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com.

During this episode, Elle reflects on some of her experiences with intersecting aspects of marginalization, as well as with enjoying privilege. She highlights the AWIS map of intersecting oppressions and privileges (click here), as well as similar diagrams from Sylvia Duckworth (click here). She talks about how she grew from dismissing systemic racism as an adolescent to becoming antiracist as an adult. In addition, she also invites a call to action for those of us who enjoy aspects of privilege in our lives today. Some of the books and ideas mentioned include: "Trans Like Me" by CN Lester For this week's show, the question has to do with your commitment to work toward the cause of inclusion and justice. How are you giving yourself to this work today? How would you like to make the world a safer and more beautiful place for all people? What is one way you can commit to the work of justice? Reach out to Elle with your comments and feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Mass media portrayals of trans lives can often be downers -- this podcast is no exception. The reality of living as transgender in a transphobic, cissexist, and heterosexist world is that suffering is nearly unavoidable. However, most of us who transition and live our lives authentically do so with the expectation of, and experience of genuine joy. In this episode, Elle discusses some of the ways in which the trans experience has brought her beauty and light. Please reach out to Elle at the show's email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com - and please share with her your experiences of trans joy.

This episode continues Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This edition stands alone but is probably best absorbed in the context of the previous five (linked below). Elle talks about the spiritual nature of her transition, and how she made sense of it as someone who believes in the divine, the camaraderie she experienced meeting and hearing the stories of other trans people, and the professional medical consensus on her personal case. Additional themes in this episode of Transgender Woman Talking include: support groups, the DSM-V, the WPATH, Kate Bowler and her book "The Lives We Actually Have", conversion therapy or reparative therapy, gaslighting, gatekeeping, code language, and medical procedures. . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender-e1r3df3/a-a8tfsck Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-2-e1t0hp9/a-a94fg40 Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-3-e1v9592/a-a9c8939 Am I Transgender? (Part 4) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-4-e23bj4a/a-a9ouuq2 Am I Transgender? (Part 5) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-5-e26pv66 . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com with constructive feedback, questions, or connection :)

In this week's episode, Elle tackles a question submitted by a listener about the mental and emotional effects of hormone replacement therapy. Discussions about the physical bodily results of HRT are discussed ad-nauseum on forums like Reddit, but sometimes the subtle impacts that take place between our ears are lost in the shuffle. For many trans people, some of the most palpable changes through transition happen in the mind, and no doubt in part due to hormones therapy. Because she is transfeminine, this conversation centers on the impacts of progesterone and estrogen on folks assigned male at birth (and not on transmasculine folks who use testosterone). This episode discusses both positive, negative, surprising, and expected results of this regimen, as well as how she received access living in the United States. Some of the topics included are: sexuality and sex drive, emotion regulation, politics and equitable access, second puberty, side-effects, and joy. As always, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com to offer your constructive feedback, and ask questions. Trans siblings and allies, you are not alone ❤️

In this week's episode, Elle discusses Laurie Frankel's 2017 book "This Is How It Always Is", now in its second printing from Flatiron Books. The book is a novel about a family with a trans young person, and the trials and travails they all go through navigating a transphobic heterosexist cissexist world. In the episode, Elle discusses some of her reflections on the book, the points that resonate with her own experience and that of her clients. She also talks a little about the pressure that trans people face from cis people to fit into a box, any box whatsoever. The show also explores the experience of validation, and how our human need to feel un-alone may unwittingly press people to self-identify in ways that are ultimately not productive. Finally, she discusses the challenges of parenting; and the ways in which it often ends up being a repeated leap of faith. . As always, please reach out to the producer/director/host/editor/marketer of Transgender Woman Talking at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

This episode is a recording of Elle's most recent creative work, a sermon given at Paradox Church in Redlands, a congregation that is enthusiastically affirming of LGBTQ people, anti-racist, and feminist. Elle's friend Craig is the lead pastor of the church and has invited her several times now to speak to the community. Paradox Church follows the Revised Common Lectionary and as such, Elle took her marching orders on the passage for the week from that document. Matthew 18:15-20 was the gospel reading for this week, and as she discusses in the lecture, is fraught with problems over the course of Christian history. In the coming weeks, Elle will follow up on some of these concepts, expanding them specifically for transgender people, and explaining more candidly some of the elements that were left out. You may also watch a video recording of this lecture at Paradox Church's youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xywt-H0Cr_c As always, send Elle an email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. Stay tuned for future full length episodes :)

Elle talks about a small ministry based out of her previous denomination, and some of the harmful messages it espouses about queer folks. She discusses and unpleasant online interaction with former ministry colleagues, and her unvarnished responses to their messages. The episode also touches on the following themes and resources: this articlethis studyFilm Pray Away,Out Love, Please reach out with constructive feedback on the show -- as well as your opinions about which new logo draft should be used as the template for the final (click here for options) -- twatpodcasting@gmail.com. Watch out for the upcoming live recorded episode on YouTube, September 10.