Unraveling Adoption

“I have a hard time believing in love, that love just really exists, that you can love somebody. Then I feel like I have a hard time loving men and stuff, so I wouldn't want them to get hurt if they ever felt like I didn't love them.” - Tammy Murphy Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Tammy Murphy, a Black, same-race, domestic adoptee living in Indiana. Tammy shared her struggles with social anxiety and dissociation, stemming from her adoption experience. She recounted how her adoptive mother's inconsistent responses to her questions about being adopted led to confusion and a sense of not belonging. Tammy also shared her journey of self-medication with substances like alcohol and marijuana to cope with her feelings of disconnect and identity crisis. Despite facing challenges in forming deep relationships and feeling a sense of authenticity, Tammy has taken steps towards healing. She recently started therapy and has begun journaling to identify triggers and coping mechanisms. Tammy expressed her aspirations to become an adoption therapist and to write a memoir titled Two to Forgive, focusing on forgiveness towards her birth mother and adoptive mother. Throughout the episode, Tammy emphasized the importance of honesty in adoptive families, early communication about adoption, and seeking therapy and self-help resources to navigate the complexities of adoption trauma. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Resource mentioned in this episode: Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Comprehensive Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing In Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproductionhttps://amzn.to/3QLyqXF Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:05:30 - Connecting with Others as an Adoptee 00:11:01 - Seeking Therapy and Beginning to Address Adoption Trauma 00:14:06 - Future Goals: Becoming an Adoption Therapist 00:15:50 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Honesty and Openness 00:16:40 - Impact of Lies and Deception on Adoptees 00:18:16 - Advice for Adoptees: Therapy, Emotional Intelligence, and Coping Strategies

"I'm in a great place, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally." -- Joey Nakao Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this heartfelt episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes her son, Joey, back to the podcast after a five-month hiatus. Joey, a courageous 20-year-old in recovery from addiction, shares his journey of sobriety and self-discovery with listeners. The episode delves into Joey's recent experiences at Hazelden Betty Ford in Palm Springs, where he is participating in a PHP (Partial Hospitalization Program). Joey reflects on the challenges he has faced during his recovery, including moments of discomfort and the temptation to leave the program. However, he credits the supportive community at the treatment center for helping him stay grounded and committed to his sobriety. Joey opens up about his transformative experiences with meditation, where he received messages of healing and self-preservation. He also discusses his plans for the future, including moving into an apartment with a friend from rehab and continuing his recovery journey. As the episode unfolds, Beth and Joey discuss their upcoming book, Adoptees and Suicidality, which aims to shed light on the connection between adoption and mental health struggles. Joey expresses his desire to be more involved in the podcast and potentially pursue a career in counseling or recovery support. Throughout the episode, Joey emphasizes the importance of honesty, self-nurturing, and community support in the recovery process. He encourages listeners struggling with addiction to stay hopeful and seek help from those who can hold their truth with compassion. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Hear an earlier episode with Joey and Beth about suicidality: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/25558716 Hazelden Betty Ford Addiction and Mental Health Treatment Services (with services throughout the US): https://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/ Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: http://UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamps: 00:05:30 - Joey's Recovery Journey: Joey discusses his experience with recovery and the challenges he faced in previous attempts. 00:10:17 - Importance of Community in Recovery: Joey emphasizes the role of community and support in his recovery journey. 00:15:07 - Milestones in Recovery: Joey reflects on his progress in recovery and the importance of taking it day by day. 00:17:14 - Comparison between SMART Recovery and AA: Joey explains the differences between SMART Recovery and Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) in terms of approach and structure. 00:18:28 - Transformative Meditation Experiences: Joey shares his experiences with meditation and the insights he gained during the practice. 00:21:35 - Unraveling Adoption Book Announcement: Beth discusses the upcoming release of the book Adoptees and Suicidality and its significance in raising awareness about suicide. 00:23:20 - Overcoming Stigma in Recovery: Joey encourages understanding and compassion for individuals struggling with addiction, emphasizing the importance of support and...

"Taiko drumming is a wonderful way to release lots of negative energy and have it transformed into positive energy. " -- Jennifer Weir Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes guest Jennifer Weir, a Korean adoptee who connected with her Asian identity through Taiko drumming. Jennifer shares her journey of being adopted from South Korea at a young age and growing up in North Dakota with very little Asian representation. Despite facing bullying and struggles with identity, Jennifer found solace in Taiko drumming, eventually becoming the executive director of Taiko Arts Midwest. The episode delves into Jennifer's experience organizing a groundbreaking concert featuring elite women Taiko drummers from Japan, the US, and Canada. The concert, captured in the award-winning documentary Finding Her Beat, highlighted the challenges faced by women in the male-dominated Taiko industry. The film showcases the power of Taiko drumming as a form of expression and healing, resonating with audiences worldwide. Beth and Jennifer discuss the complexities of Asian identity, the importance of processing grief, and the transformative power of Taiko drumming in navigating personal struggles. Jennifer's journey from a Korean adoptee to a Taiko drumming powerhouse serves as an inspiration to adoptees and individuals exploring their cultural heritage. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Resources mentioned in this episode: Finding Her Beat documentary: https://www.herbeatfilm.com/ HERbeat: Taiko Women All-Stars (Full Concert Video): https://vimeo.com/ondemand/herbeat TaikoArts Midwest: https://www.taikoartsmidwest.org/ Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamps: 00:01:05 - Guest Introduction: Jennifer Weir, Korean Adoptee 00:02:20 - Jennifer's Adoption Story: Arrival in the U.S. 00:03:31 - Growing Up in North Dakota as an Asian Adoptee 00:06:00 - Lack of Asian Cultural Connection in Childhood 00:08:00 - Experience of Bullying and Microaggressions in School 00:09:37 - Jennifer's Response to Bullying and Racism 00:11:59 - Vulnerable Story of Dealing with Bullying 00:13:32 - Coping with Rage 00:15:11 - Taiko Drumming is Cathartic and Therapeutic 00:16:08 - Women in Taiko Drumming: Gender Dynamics 00:17:13 - Empowering Women in Taiko Drumming 00:19:53 - Production of "Finding Her Beat" Documentary 00:21:38 - Jennifer's Family Involvement in Taiko Drumming 00:22:05 - Choosing Japanese Taiko Drumming over Korean Drumming 00:25:20 - Impact of Finding Her Beat on the Adoptee Community 00:27:02 - Information on Finding Her Beat film and TaikoArts Midwest 00:28:02 - Support Unraveling Adoption Podcast and Patreon Membership

"...when you're walking around with a sense of loss, or you feel like your first mother or first family don't want you, there's two ways you go about this. Either A, you're going to get really enmeshed and get real clingy because you don't want to lose. Or B, you get this detachment, and as adoptees and groups sometimes say, ‘I'm going to leave you before you leave me.’" -- Jonathan Newbern Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of hosting Jonathan Newbern, a same-race domestic adoptee deeply involved with Codependents Anonymous (CODA). Jonathan shared his poignant adoption journey, marked by a late discovery of his adoption status and a tumultuous childhood. He bravely delved into the connection between relinquishment trauma, adoption trauma, reunion trauma, and codependency, shedding light on the complexities adoptees often face. Jonathan's personal experiences and insights into codependency from an adoptee's perspective provided valuable tools and practical advice for those struggling with similar issues. He emphasized the importance of seeking help, setting boundaries, and engaging in self-care practices to navigate the challenges of codependency. Throughout the episode, Jonathan's vulnerability and resilience shone through as he shared his journey of healing and growth. His message of empowerment and self-worth resonated deeply, reminding listeners that they are not alone in their struggles. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Jonathan’s information: Jonathan on Instragram: https://www.instagram.com/jonknee1/ Jonathan on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jon.newbern Email Jonathan: jonknee51475@gmail.com Resources mentioned in this episode: Codependents Anonymous (CODA): https://coda.org/ Adoption Mosaic: https://adoptionmosaic.com/ Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION Timestamps 00:00:00 - Introduction to Adoption and Codependency 00:05:30 - Jonathan's Adoption Story Unveiled 00:10:45 - Codependency and Attachment Styles 00:17:05 - Jonathan's Journey to Codependents Anonymous 00:20:39 - Recovery Tools and Self-Care Practices 00:22:06 - Embracing the Adoption Constellation 00:26:20 - Contact Information for Jonathan

Sexuality and Adoption: Insights from a Transracial Adoptee and Sex Therapist "For me, sexual and reproductive health or our sexuality is so connected with attraction, with attachment style, with self-esteem, with the wish for connecting and creating long-term bonds." -- Anna Linde Read the transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HVN38Q94D5ZXH9GR708NDX4E Adoptive parents, you're invited to a webinar that Anna Linde will be leading on June 5, 2024. More information and register here: https://AnnaLinde.eventbrite.com Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Anna Linde, a transracial adoptee and a sex therapist. Anna shared her unique perspective on the intersection of adoption and sexuality, shedding light on the complexities and challenges adoptees face in this area. Anna, who was adopted from Brazil to Sweden at just six weeks old, grew up as one of the few Black children in her community. She discussed the impact of the "white gaze" on her self-perception and how it influenced her views on intimacy and relationships. Throughout the conversation, Anna highlighted the importance of addressing shame, anxiety, and boundaries in adoptees' sexual identities. She emphasized the need for adoptive parents to create a safe space for their children to explore healthy boundaries and navigate their sexuality with confidence. The discussion delved into the role of cultural stereotypes in shaping adoptees' sexual experiences and the challenges of navigating relationships in a society that often perpetuates harmful norms. Anna shared personal anecdotes and insights from her work as a sex therapist, offering valuable perspectives on how adoptees can cultivate a positive relationship with their bodies and sexuality. Towards the end of the episode, we announced an upcoming webinar on June 5 which will be led by Anna, focusing on sexual and reproductive health for adoptees. The webinar aims to provide adoptive parents and caretakers with valuable insights and tools to support their children in developing healthy attitudes towards sexuality. Overall, this episode provided a thought-provoking exploration of the complex dynamics at the intersection of adoption and sexuality, offering valuable guidance and insights for adoptees and adoptive parents alike. Anna's expertise and personal experiences added depth and nuance to the conversation, highlighting the importance of addressing these issues within the adoption community. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Anna’s information: Find Anna on Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-linde-08264692/ Find Anna on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/lindes_therapy/ Here’s Anna’s Linktree with more resources: https://linktr.ee/lindestherapy Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamps: 00:00:02 - Introduction to the podcast and guest, Anna Linde 00:05:39 - Discussion on the white gaze and self-identity 00:07:49 - Impact of body image on sexuality 00:10:17 - Common sexual problems among adoptees 00:14:18 -...

"I hate when people say that my life should be a movie. Can we just ban that phrase?" - Jeremy Read the transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HV5M7AN2D7GP4H2P1NBVSNMQ Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson delves into the complexities of adoption alongside her guest, Jeremy, a 24-year-old adopted person from Texas. Jeremy shares his journey of struggling with various health issues and neurodivergence, only to discover the genetic roots of his challenges after reuniting with his birth family in 2022. Jeremy's adoption story unfolds as he recounts being adopted in Albuquerque, New Mexico, from a birth family in Denver. Raised in Texas by adoptive parents who were open about his adoption but painted a negative picture of his birth mother, Jeremy grew up questioning his identity and health issues without a clear genetic history. As Jeremy navigates his health challenges, including asthma, joint pain, and dysautonomia, he sheds light on the importance of knowing one's genetic background for proper diagnosis and treatment. With a recent diagnosis of hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS), Jeremy emphasizes the need for healthcare professionals to recognize and address invisible disabilities like EDS. Through his journey of self-discovery and reunion with his birth family, Jeremy finds validation and understanding in shared experiences with relatives who also have EDS. He highlights the significance of acceptance and support from adoptive families, healthcare providers, and the community in addressing the unique needs of adoptees with complex medical histories. Listeners are encouraged to reflect on the impact of closed adoptions, ableism, and stigma surrounding birth parents, as Beth and Jeremy advocate for a more inclusive and informed approach to adoption and healthcare. The episode concludes with a call to action for spreading awareness and support for adoptees facing health challenges and seeking reunion. To connect with Jeremy and explore more adoption-related content, visit his Instagram account, Borderline Adoptee. Additionally, listeners are invited to engage with Unraveling Adoption through their website and Patreon community to support ongoing discussions and resources for adoptive families and individuals impacted by adoption. Stay tuned for more insightful conversations and stories on Unraveling Adoption. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: http://unravelingadoption.com/calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: http://unravelingadoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE: Find Jeremy at BorderlineAdoptee on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/borderlineadoptee/ Find out more about Ehler’s Danlos Syndrome (EDS) here: https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/what-is-eds/ Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: http://UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== TIMESTAMPS 00:00:02 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption: Beth Syverson introduces the podcast and shares her personal connection to adoption. 00:01:05 - Jeremy's Adoption Story: Jeremy shares his adoption story, including details about his birth family and upbringing. 00:03:01 - Searching for Birth Mother: Jeremy talks about his search for...

"I want to normalize the practice of spirituality and ancestral rituals. They're a normal part of our lives." Helena Soholm, PhD Read the Transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HTRHNP4AKM7DD2K35958K78A Episode Summary Beth Syverson, the host of the podcast Unraveling Adoption, welcomes Dr. Helena Soholm as a guest on the show. Dr. Soholm, a Korean mudang or shaman, shares her unique journey of combining contemporary forms of shamanism and psychology to help adoptees connect with their ancestors. Despite not being an adoptee herself, Helena has been instrumental in assisting Korean adoptees in their healing process through communication with their ancestors. Helena's childhood experiences in Korea, surrounded by intuitive women and spiritual gifts, laid the foundation for her eventual path as a shaman. Her awakening to the power of ancestors led her to integrate psychology and shamanism in a profound way. Through her work, she has helped adoptees navigate their complex emotions and traumas by facilitating connections with their ancestral lineage. The podcast delves into Helena's personal journey, including her initiation as a mudang in 2018 and her experiences working with adoptees in both Korea and Denmark. She emphasizes the importance of developing one's spiritual authority and trusting oneself for healing. Dr. Soholm's approach focuses on empowering individuals to connect with their ancestors and find peace within themselves. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Dr. Helena Soholm’s information: https://www.helenasoholm.com/Article about her Shamanic initiation: https://koreajoongangdaily.joins.com/news/article/article.aspx?aid=3049607 Dr. Soholm’s Lecture and Korean Shamanic Ritual at Yale: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bIAip2e5u0&t=616s Find Helena on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helenasoholm/ and on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/helenasoholm Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION Timestamps 00:00:02 - Introduction to Helena Soholm: Beth introduces Helena Soholm, a Korean mudang or shaman, and discusses her unique background and qualifications. 00:08:16 - Helena's Journey to Becoming a Shaman: Helena shares her personal journey and struggles with embracing her calling to become a mudang. 00:15:50 - Helena's Connection with Adoptees: Helena discusses her awakening to the ancestors and how she helps adoptees connect with their lineage. 00:26:28 - Healing and Connection for Adoptees: Helena explains the outcomes and benefits adoptees experience through her ceremonies and ancestral connections. 00:34:51 - Seeking Reputable Ancestral Work: Helena provides guidance on finding reputable practitioners for ancestral work and emphasizes the importance of trusting one's intuition. 00:36:45 - Empowering Self-Healing: Helena emphasizes the importance of empowering individuals to heal themselves and build their spiritual authority.

"I think everyone has had this experience of feeling like they're in two places or even more than that, but not quite enough of any." -- Anthony Lynch Read the Transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HSYYTTTDQ2QVDVHZ079SXA3E Episode Summary: Beth Syverson, the host of the podcast "Unraveling Adoption," welcomes Anthony Lynch, a 24-year-old non-binary transracial adoptee living in London, as a guest on the show. Anthony is the co-founder of In Between Lines, an organization that empowers individuals with complex identities. Throughout the episode, Anthony shares insights into their personal journey as a transracial adoptee with Jamaican and white heritage, growing up in a multicultural family in London. Anthony discusses the challenges of navigating multiple identities, including being adopted, non-binary, and mixed race. They highlight the importance of embracing one's full identity and the complexities that come with straddling different cultural backgrounds. Anthony also sheds light on the concept of intersectionality and how it influences individual experiences and societal perceptions. The conversation delves into the significance of creating spaces for individuals with complex identities to share their stories and connect with others. Anthony shares about the work of In Between Lines, including an upcoming exhibition featuring individuals with diverse backgrounds and identities. They emphasize the need for a more nuanced understanding of identity and the importance of fostering inclusivity and acceptance. Beth and Anthony also discuss the upcoming parliamentary inquiry on adoptee voices in the UK, where Anthony is a steering group member. They touch on the mental health implications of complex identities and the role of policymakers in supporting individuals with diverse backgrounds. Throughout the episode, Beth and Anthony explore the power of authenticity, community, and understanding in embracing complex identities. They encourage listeners to reflect on their own identities and challenge societal norms that limit individuals to singular labels. The episode concludes with a call to share the conversation with others and continue the dialogue on identity and acceptance. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Anthony’s Contact Information: Find Anthony on Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anthony-emanuel-lynch/ In-Between Lines on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/inbetweenlinesorg/ In-Between Lines website: https://inbetweenlines.co.uk/ Anthony Lynch is a researcher working in the intersection between Lived Experience and Policy. Their work with Complex Identities began when they co-founded In-Between Lines, an award-winning creative community for individuals belonging to multiple ethnicities, cultures, and families. As a research assistant at Coram, the UK's oldest Children's charity, they use their lived experience as a mixed non-binary adoptee to inform policy. They are also a steering group member for an upcoming parliamentary inquiry into adoptee voices, organized by the All Party Parliamentary Group on Adoption and Permanence. =============== Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast...

"I think that being an adoptee groomed me to relinquish my own child." -- Monica Hall Transcript of this episode: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HSM5N1067HY39ZRSGK11MB5T Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes guest Monica Hall, an adoptee and birth mother who has recently published her memoir titled Practically Still a Virgin: an Adoption Memoir. Monica shares her journey of healing and self-discovery through writing her memoir, which delves into the complexities of adoption, trauma, and family relationships. Monica opens up about her challenging childhood in Alaska, where she faced abuse and trauma within her adoptive family. She candidly discusses her experiences of relinquishing her daughter for adoption and the guilt and complexities that came with it. Through writing her memoir, Monica unravels layers of repressed memories and emotions, ultimately finding healing and clarity. The podcast episode highlights Monica's writing process, where she initially struggled with self-doubt and perfectionism but found guidance and support from a dedicated editor. Monica emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to start writing without judgment and to embrace the process of uncovering deep-seated emotions and experiences. As Monica shares her personal journey of healing and self-discovery through writing, she encourages other adoptees and birth mothers to embark on their own memoir-writing journey. The episode concludes with a special giveaway of Monica's memoir, inviting listeners to participate by writing a review of the podcast or becoming a Patreon member. Listeners are encouraged to explore Monica's powerful memoir, Practically Still a Virgin, and to support her in sharing her story of resilience and growth. The episode serves as a poignant reminder of the transformative power of storytelling and the importance of finding healing through self-expression and reflection. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Monica's Website: MonicaHall.com Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION Timestamps: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Podcast 00:05:30 - Overcoming Childhood Trauma and Identity Issues 00:09:25 - Starting the Memoir Writing Journey 00:16:08 - Writing Process and Reflections 00:20:46 - Uncovering Layers of Trauma and Family Relationships 00:24:18 - Recovery and Healing Journey 00:26:23 - Advice for Aspiring Memoir Writers 00:27:41 - Book Giveaway Announcement and Support for Unraveling Adoption Podcast

"I think adoptees who are going to go try to find their family have to recognize that... once you get into the process, you just have to roll with it, right? You have to be optimistic and hopeful and just play it out." -- David R. Ford Episode Synopsis In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson delves into the complexities of adoption alongside her guest, David R. Ford, an adoptee who reunited with his birth family 20 years ago. The episode explores the theme of family relationships, especially in the context of reunion with birth families. Beth introduces David as an adoptee who was adopted at birth through a private adoption handled by a lawyer. David shares his early childhood experiences and the limited information he had about his birth parents, including the revelation that he had a seven-year older brother. Despite not initially feeling the need to find his birth parents, David's journey to reconnect with his birth family began in his late 30s. Through a series of events, David eventually reunites with his birth mother and discovers he is one of seven children, four of whom were given up for adoption. The podcast delves into the complexities of navigating newfound relationships with siblings and birth family members, highlighting the challenges and joys that come with such reunions. Beth also brings on Tibby, David's wife, to provide insights into the experience of being a spouse navigating the complexities of adoption reunion. Tibby shares her perspective on the intense emotions and dynamics that come with welcoming new family members into their lives. The episode touches on the importance of supportive adoptive parents, the emotional toll of navigating difficult family dynamics, and the significance of maintaining core values and boundaries throughout the reunion process. David reflects on the metaphorical significance of the title of his memoir, "Blind in One Eye," and the journey of self-discovery and acceptance that comes with reuniting with one's birth family. As the episode wraps up, Beth encourages listeners to explore the resources and support available on the Unraveling Adoption website, emphasizing the importance of seeking guidance and validation in the adoption journey. The episode concludes with a message of staying safe and embracing authenticity in navigating the complexities of adoption and family relationships. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Resource Mentioned in this Episode: Contact David and find out more about his memoir Blind In One Eye at: https://blindinoneeye.com Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION Timestamps Introduction to Unraveling Adoption: 00:00:02-00:00:13 David's Adoption Story: 00:01:23-00:02:57 David's Search for Birth Family: 00:03:29-00:06:41 Reunion with Birth Mother: 00:07:15-00:09:33 Relationship with Siblings: 00:10:04-00:12:40 Tibby's Perspective on Family Reunion: 00:15:18-00:17:02 Navigating Family Dynamics: 00:17:28-00:21:39 Book Title Explanation: 00:25:26-00:26:29 Closing Remarks and Resources: 00:27:19-00:28:46

"I was always trying to fit in and chameleon wherever I was." -- Bethany Fraser Transcript Read this episode's transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HR5W5M78X0PE4FV5GJNREW2AIn this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes guest Bethany Fraser, an adoptee and host of The Adoptee Diaries podcast. The conversation delves into the complexities of adoption, focusing on the impact of secrets and identity issues within the adoption experience. Bethany shares her personal journey of discovering her biracial identity in her 40s, after a secret about her ethnicity was kept from her by her adoptive parents. The discussion explores the emotional and psychological effects of this deception on Bethany's identity, psyche, and relationships. Throughout the episode, Bethany reflects on her experience as an adoptee, highlighting the importance of truth, trust, and transparency in adoption. She emphasizes the need for adoptive parents to be open and honest with their children about their origins and ethnicity, to foster a sense of belonging and self-awareness. The conversation is candid and heartfelt, with both hosts sharing their vulnerabilities and insights into the complexities of adoption. Beth and Bethany aim to create a space for adoptees to share their stories and find support within the adoption community. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Resources mentioned in this episode: Find Bethany's podcast The Adoptee Diaries on your favorite podcast app or through this link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adoptee-diaries-truth-trust-and-transparency/id1687716450 Find Bethany on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/theadopteediaries/ Read an essay Bethany wrote for Barker Adoption Foundation: https://www.barkeradoptionfoundation.org/adoption-resources/barker-blog/adoptee%E2%80%99s-experience-family-fortitude-forgiveness-story-searching Other Resources APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTubeSupport Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoptionCheck out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.comCreate your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION TIME STAMPS: 00:00:02 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:33 - Early Awareness of Adoption and Ethnicity 00:03:33 - Early Interactions with Other Adoptees 00:05:12 - Questioning Ethnic Identity 00:07:05 - Reflecting on Parents' Motivations 00:09:47 - Prompt to Discover Ethnicity 00:11:22 - Ancestry DNA Results Revealed 00:12:44 - Unpacking Cultural Layers 00:14:07 - Curiosity and Self-Identity 00:15:03 - Impact Before Discovering Truth 00:16:08 - Masking True Self 00:17:44 - Feeling Displaced 00:18:27 - Seeking Community and Support 00:20:30 - Advice for Adoptive Parents 00:22:37 - Discovery of Parents' Knowledge 00:24:04 - Emotional Impact of Revelation 00:25:37 - Launch of The Adoptee Diaries 00:27:31 - Encouragement for Adoptive Parents 00:29:08 - Call to Share and Support Unraveling Adoption

"I had to be OK with the fact that they might not accept me for who I am." - Joe Toolan Transcript Read this episode's transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HQC31S90118VY2NM91EADH9Q Episode Summary In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson delves into the complexities of adoption through the lens of LGBTQ+ adoptees. Joined by guest Joe Toolan, a transracial, queer adoptee from Guatemala, the episode explores the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ+ individuals in the adoption process. Joe shares his personal journey of growing up in a conservative white family in Maryland, navigating his identity as a queer, Latine, indigenous, transracial adoptee. He reflects on the struggles of coming out to his adoptive family and the impact it had on their relationship. The episode highlights the importance of support and acceptance for LGBTQ+ adoptees, emphasizing the need for adoptive parents to create a safe and affirming environment for their children. Resources such as PFLAG, the Trevor Project, and GLSEN are recommended for allies and family members seeking to educate themselves and support LGBTQ+ individuals. As Joe recounts his reunion with his birth family in Guatemala, the episode showcases the power of authenticity and self-acceptance in building meaningful connections. Despite initial concerns about acceptance, Joe's birth mother's unconditional love and support demonstrate the transformative impact of embracing one's true identity. Listeners are encouraged to engage with the LGBTQ+ adoptee community, seek support from advocacy organizations, and participate in upcoming events like the town hall meeting addressing the safety and well-being of adopted children. Through heartfelt storytelling and insightful conversations, Unraveling Adoption provides a compassionate and informative platform for exploring the intersection of adoption and LGBTQ+ identities, fostering understanding and empathy for all individuals touched by adoption. Resources mentioned in this episode Contact Joe through Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/toolan_joe/ Find help for LGBTQ+ people and their allies here: PFLAG: https://pflag.org/ The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ GLSEN: https://www.glsen.org/ Guatemalan adoptees can find support through the organization Joe works with, Adoptees of Guatemalan Roots: https://www.guateroots.org/ Attend the Town Hall meeting on Sunday, March 10, 2024, to discuss adoptee murders and what we can do to keep our community's adopted children safe. adopteemurders.eventbrite.com Other Resources APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.comFind us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTubeSupport Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoptionCheck out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.comCreate your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Timestamps: 00:00:02 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:15 - Embracing LGBTQ+ Voices 00:01:37 - Early Childhood and Adoption Story 00:02:14 - Growing Up in a Conservative Community 00:03:35 - Coming Out as LGBTQ+ 00:04:39 - Navigating Relationships After Coming Out 00:05:03 - Challenges of Coming Out Again in Reunion 00:05:42 - Support Systems and Role Models 00:06:57 - Finding Community in College 00:07:53 - Coming Out to Friends 00:08:14 - Struggles...

"The root of the work, I would say, is really slowing down and learning how to sit with the discomfort of different sensations in the body." -- Rebecca Berg Transcript Read this episode's transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01HQC31S90118VY2NM91EADH9Q Synopsis In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Rebecca Berg, a registered dietitian and adoptee who specializes in the intersection of adoption and food behaviors. Rebecca shared her personal journey of overcoming orthorexia and how early childhood trauma can manifest in issues around food. We delved into the complexities of adoption trauma and its impact on food relationships, highlighting the importance of understanding the connection between food and emotional well-being. Rebecca emphasized the need for adoptees to feel connected to their bodies and prioritize self-care, especially when dealing with stress and anxiety. She discussed the concept of "safe foods" for children with trauma histories and the importance of creating a structured and consistent meal environment to promote a sense of safety and security. As an adoptive parent, Rebecca provided valuable insights on supporting adopted children with food issues, emphasizing the significance of co-regulation and offering familiar, comforting foods to build trust and stability. She also introduced the concept of "body doubling" as a supportive technique for individuals struggling with nutrition and mental health challenges. Throughout the episode, Rebecca highlighted the importance of seeking professional help from registered dietitians with expertise in mental health and eating disorders. She shared practical advice for adoptive parents and individuals struggling with food-related issues, emphasizing the need for patience, self-compassion, and a willingness to explore and experiment with different approaches to nutrition and well-being. The episode concluded with a reminder to join the upcoming town hall meeting on March 10th to address the serious issue of murders of adopted children by adoptive parents and brainstorm ways to create safer environments for adopted children in our communities. Overall, the episode provides valuable insights into the complex relationship between adoption, trauma, and food behaviors, offering practical strategies for individuals and families navigating these challenges. Timestamps Introduction to Unraveling Adoption: 00:00:02-00:00:13 Exploring the Intersection of Adoption and Food Behaviors: 00:00:46-00:00:56 Personal Journey of an Adoptee and Registered Dietitian: 00:04:12-00:05:57 Understanding Orthorexia and Recovery: 00:05:05-00:06:07 Impact of Anxiety and Trauma on Eating Behaviors: 00:08:17-00:09:48 Becoming a Registered Dietitian: 00:10:06-00:11:29 Challenges and Nuances of Food Issues: 00:12:27-00:13:22 Strategies for Grounding and Regulation: 00:14:40-00:15:56 Body Doubling and Supportive Techniques: 00:15:56-00:16:44 Advice for Adoptive Parents on Food Issues: 00:17:02-00:19:00 Importance of Safe Foods and Feeding Practices: 00:19:10-00:20:17 Seeking Help and Professional Support: 00:20:38-00:22:51 Upcoming Event and Call to Action: 00:23:01-00:24:07 Resources mentioned in this episode Contact Rebecca at https://www.nostringsnutrition.com/. Find Rebecca on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/no.strings.nutrition/ Follow Rebecca on Facebook @No Strings Nutrition: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61554833143968 Attend the Town Hall meeting on Sunday, March 10, 2024, to discuss adoptee murders and what we can do to keep our community's adopted children safe. adopteemurders.eventbrite.com Other Resources APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ Unraveling Adoption is...

My adoptive father talked about it as my birthright to go back to Central America. I really like that framing. So I think that was part of the reason why they let me go on so many trips and that was such a wonderful experience. - Nelson de Witt Discover the shocking truth about Nelson de Witt's journey to uncover his past after being adopted from Central America. His story is a heart-wrenching tale of forced disappearances, political strife, and the courage to face the truth. Nelson's experiences will leave you in awe and disbelief as he navigates the complexities of adoption and the impact of historical and cultural tragedies. Stay tuned to learn more about Nelson's daring quest for truth and how it continues to shape his life today. In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the impact of forced disappearances on families in Central and South America. Explore the complexities of political conflicts in Central America and how it impacted him as an adopted person. Dive into the importance of understanding historical and cultural contexts of adoptees' early lives. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== My special guest is Nelson de Witt Nelson de Witt, also known as Nelson/Roberto, is an advocate and survivor of El Salvador's civil war. He experienced a forced disappearance as a one-year-old and was reunited with his birth family at the age of 16. Nelson's personal story sheds light on the impact of forced disappearances on families. Through his experiences, he brings a unique perspective that helps to unravel the complexities of adoption and the historical and cultural context of the forced disappearances in Central and South America. His insights and advocacy work contribute to a greater understanding of the profound effects of such events on those involved - adopted or not. The resources mentioned in this episode are: Visit Nelson/Roberto's website at Nelsonroberto.com to learn more about his documentary film Identifying Nelson/Buscando Roberto and his book Waking from Innocent Dreams. Check out the book Missing Mila, Finding Family written by Nelson's adoptive mother, which provides her perspective on the adoption story: https://amzn.to/4bDAABo Keep an eye out for Nelson's upcoming story workshops for adoptees, which he may be launching publicly later in the year. https://www.instagram.com/dewittn19/ Impact of Forced Disappearances Influenced by social, political, and personal factors, forced disappearances have far-reaching impacts on families and societies. The individuals left behind wrestle with prolonged uncertainty, emotional distress, and other psychological ramifications. Being aware of the deep emotional trauma fostered by forced disappearances aids us in comprehending the resilience shown by survivors and provides better support and understanding to those affected. Political Conflicts in Central America Historical instances of political unrest in Central America have resulted in numerous human rights violations, including forced disappearances. These conflicts are multifaceted, characterized by fluid alliances, entrenched inequality, and differing ideological perspectives. By understanding these complexities, we gain a deeper insight into the atmosphere that gives rise to phenomena such as forced disappearances and how these events impact individuals and communities. =============== Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph...

Love is an action. It's not always pink and it's not always red. Sometimes it gets black, sometimes it gets blue. But love is an action. - Alicia Murray In this episode, you will be able to: Explore the challenges of foster care and adoption journeys. Discover the profound importance of sibling connections in adoption. Embrace the value of openness in adoption and birth family connections. Find out how to provide essential post-adoption services and support. Uncover the challenges and realities of adopting older children. My special guest is Alicia Murray Our guest, Alicia Murray, brings a wealth of firsthand experience in the adoption landscape. Having been adopted at the age of ten after navigating through seven different foster placements, Alicia's journey offers a unique perspective on the challenges of adoption, particularly when it comes to older children. With a background in psychology and a current role as a family support specialist, Alicia's insights are rooted in both personal experience and professional expertise. Her work in helping foster youth find permanency further solidifies her credibility as an advocate in the adoption community. Plus she's now an adoptive mom of two sibling toddlers herself. Alicia joins us to shed light on the realities and complexities of adopting older children, offering valuable knowledge and empathy to our discussion. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== The resources mentioned in this episode are: Email Alicia at Alicia@affcny.org for any questions or inquiries about their programs and services. Visit AFFCNY.org to explore an array of resources, events, programs, and support groups for adoptive families, teens, and everyone involved in the adoption process. https://www.instagram.com/affcny/https://www.facebook.com/affcnyExplore the resources and support provided by Wendy's Wonderful Kids, a nonprofit organization collaborating with AFFCNY to help older adopted youth find permanent placement: https://www.davethomasfoundation.org/our-programs/wendys-wonderful-kids/ Beth's wonderful life coach, Heather Ross, has a podcast plus individual and group coaching: HeatherRossCoaching.com =============== Embrace openness in adoption A conversation with Alicia Murray unveils the transformative power of openness in adoption. She conveys a strong need for adoptive families to support a child’s connection with their biological roots, affirming it’s crucial for maintaining their sense of identity and well-being. With Alicia’s encouraging perspective, it becomes evident that embracing openness in adoption does not necessarily divide love but multiplies it, fostering a nurturing environment for the child's overall development. =============== Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamped summary of this episode: 00:00:00 - Introduction and Background Beth Syverson introduces herself as an adoptive mom and certified coach. Guest, Alicia Murray, shares her experience of being adopted at age ten after multiple foster placements. 00:00:51 - Alicia's Foster Experience Alicia describes her...

"I started meditating a lot, and eventually doing retreats, eventually going to monasteries, spending some time in a Zen Buddhist meditation center. So, yeah, I think that's kind of where I took my pain, my anguish, my existential questions, and I think there's some ambiguity there. I think there's also a kind of escapism, because I didn't know how to connect with the world or address questions that other people my age were addressing. Like livelihood, relationships, family. I just sat on a cushion." - Julian Washio Collette Can you imagine the weight of not belonging and carrying the trauma of multiple abandonments? The struggle to find a sense of identity and stability after being adopted and then relinquished and adopted again is incredibly challenging. The lack of control over your own story and the feeling of being failed by the system can leave deep emotional scars. Julian's life story will help you understand the impacts of relinquishment, and will make you aware of the importance of finding support and community to help navigate the complexities of adoption. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the unique challenges of being a double adoptee and how it shapes one's identity. Explore the profound impact of abandonment and abuse on adoptees and their journey to healing. Gain insight into the complexities of adoption and the importance of understanding its nuances. Discover the need for better support systems for adoptees and how it can positively impact their lives. Learn about the lifelong impact of multiple abandonments and how it shapes the adoptee's perspective and experiences. My special guest is Julian Washio-Collette Julian Washio-Collette, a former Catholic monk currently residing in Portland, Oregon, is our guest for this episode. As a double adoptee, Julian's personal journey of being adopted as an infant and then again at the age of nine provides a unique perspective on the complexities of adoption. With a passion for writing about spirituality, adoption, and healing, Julian's insights and experiences contribute to a deeper understanding of the challenges faced by individuals impacted by adoption or abandonment. His story sheds light on the resilience and strength needed to navigate such intricate circumstances, making him a valuable voice in the conversation around adoption. =============== The resources mentioned in this episode are: Visit Julian's blog site called Peregrine Adoptee to read his insightful writings about spirituality, adoption, and healing: peregrineadoptee.wordpress.com Explore the Unraveling Adoption website to find information about upcoming events, webinars, and workshops related to adoption and healing, including Mee Ok Icaro's upcoming webinar about Sacred Plant Medicine 101 for the Adoption Constellation: unravelingadoption.com/events =============== Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unique Challenges of Double Adoptees The unique challenges faced by double adoptees like Julian Washio-Collette are centered around the absence of family continuity and frequent displacement. The uncertainty, disconnection, and confusion induced by double adoptions can leave deep psychological scars. Their unprecedented experiences urge us to shed light on the hidden complexities of double adoption and foster understanding about their distinct needs and perspectives. =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by...

“I think for adoptees, my biggest advice for them is to ask if you need something. Whether it be therapy, whether it's understanding your story, whether it's being able to know your identity, ask. And if they don't want to tell you, keep asking.” -- Sariah Baker In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the profound influence of adoption trauma on self-identity and self-worth. Discover the unique struggles and triumphs faced by intercountry adoptees in the LGBTQ+ community. Recognize the pivotal role adoptive parents play in supporting the unique needs and experiences of intercountry adoptees. Learn about effective therapeutic approaches that empower intercountry adoptees to navigate their complex identities and experiences. Observe a journey of self-discovery and personal growth as an intercountry adoptee sheds limiting labels and societal expectations. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== My special guest is Sariah Baker Sariah Baker, a 31-year-old human resources manager living in Portland, Oregon, brings a unique perspective to the complexities of intercountry and interracial adoption. As an intercountry adoptee from China, raised in a white Mormon family, Sariah's story delves into the intricate layers of identity she has navigated throughout her life. Her experiences offer valuable insights into the challenges and triumphs of finding and embracing one's true identity. The resources mentioned in this episode are: Subscribe to Sariah's YouTube channel The Adoptee Apostate for insightful content and poetry readings related to adoption, identity, and personal growth: https://www.youtube.com/@TheAdopteeApostate Follow Sariah on TikTok at The Adoptee Apostate for engaging and thought-provoking videos on adoption, mental health, and self-discovery: https://www.tiktok.com/@theadopteeapostate Connect with Sariah on Instagram at The Adoptee Apostate for updates on her journey, poetry, and discussions on adoption and identity: https://www.instagram.com/theadopteeapostate/ Here’s the book Sariah mentioned about her Chinese orphanage, Death by Default: A Policy of Fatal Neglect in China's State Orphanages: https://amzn.to/3HAsiMI Adoption Mosaic is a wonderful organization, headed by Astrid Castro, to support adoptees: https://adoptionmosaic.com/ Other resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Uncovering the Impact of Adoption Trauma Adoption trauma can have long-lasting effects on an adoptee. It can shake one's self-perception and fuel internal struggles, particularly in relation to identity. Helping adoptees navigate and heal from such trauma requires understanding, patience, and therapeutic intervention. Embracing the Vital Role of Adoptive Parents Adoptive parents play a crucial role in mitigating the impacts of adoption trauma and providing an accepting space for their children. They hold the responsibility of fostering open communication, providing emotional support, and celebrating the unique backgrounds of their adoptees. Proper understanding and support from adoptive parents can significantly aid in an adoptee's journey towards self-acceptance and self-discovery. =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn:...

"Change can happen incrementally, and oftentimes it's better that it does. We've heard the cliche 'trust the process.' Oftentimes the process is the most important thing." - David Bohl Join relinquishee/adoptee recovery coach David Bohl as he confronts the paradox of finding trust and healing in the intersection of adoption and addiction. He guides individuals towards healthy coping mechanisms and support in the face of deep-rooted trauma. In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the possible impacts of adoption trauma on mental health and addiction. Embrace TRUST as a key component in the journey to recovery. Explore the unique challenges of addiction for adopted people. Find safe and supportive communities for healing and growth. My special guest is David Bohl Meet David B. Bohl, an expert in addiction and adoption, whose personal journey through addiction recovery and exploration of the complex intersection between adoption and addiction brings a unique blend of empathy and expertise to our conversation. With a background that includes serving on the boards of prominent addiction and adoption organizations and receiving credentials from esteemed organizations like the Hazelton Betty Ford Graduate School of Addiction Studies, David's insights are informed, compassionate, and relatable. His memoir, Parallel Universes, and nonfiction book, Relinquishment and Addiction: What Trauma Has to Do with It, not only solidify his expertise but also highlight his commitment to providing support for individuals affected by adoption and addiction. David's balanced approach to destigmatizing addiction and promoting recovery reflects his genuine passion for helping others navigate their healing journey. 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX The resources mentioned in this episode are: To find David Bohl's recovery coaching services, visit his website at beaconconfidential.com or Google his name with the middle initial B to find his many resources online. Buy David’s memoir Parallel Universes: The Story of Rebirth: https://www.amazon.com/Parallel-Universes-David-B-Bohl-ebook/dp/B079KSVJGB Check out the book David wrote with Jamie Marich, Relinquishment and Addiction: What Trauma Has to Do With It: https://www.amazon.com/Relinquishment-Addiction-What-Trauma-Has-ebook/dp/B09NZ37CX6 Here’s Jamie Marich’s book Trauma and the 12 Steps: https://www.amazon.com/Trauma-12-Steps-Meditations-Reflections-ebook/dp/B08KC38MJZ Paul Sunderland's excellent video "Addiction & Adoption: Remembered Not Recalled" can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3e0-SsmOUJI Celia Center has a facilitated adoption constellation addiction group, led by David, that meets every other Tuesday. Find more information here: https://celiacenter.org/ To sign up for the Untangling Our Roots Summit in Denver in April 2024, visit the event's website for registration details. UntanglingOurRoots.com For adoptive parents interested in coaching groups, visit unravelingadoption.com/coaching or email Beth at Beth@unravelingadoption.com for more information on upcoming coaching groups or individual coaching sessions. If you're an adoptee, birth parent, adoptive parent, or ally looking for support groups or events, visit unravelingadoption.com/Calendar. I maintain a Community Calendar listing there with dozens of support groups for the adoption constellation. =============== Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email...

"Adoptive parents, go do your own work. It's kind of a natural birthright to know who you are." - Louise Browne Adoptive parents and allies: Do you want to better understand and support your adoptive child's experiences? Our guests, adoptees Sarah Reinhardt and Louise Browne, will be sharing valuable insights and guidance on how to gain a deeper understanding and provide the support that adoptees need to thrive. By listening to their stories - and other adoptees' stories they share on their Adoption: The Making of Me podcast episodes - you can gain a deeper understanding and provide the necessary support for your adoptive child to flourish. Tune in to gain some new insights to support your adoptive child's journey. In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the unique challenges of adoption experiences. Explore the impact of secrecy and shame in adoption. Gain insight into adoptees' alternate realities and perspectives. Get the inside scoop about Sarah and Louise's friendship and their podcast, Adoption: The Making of Me. My special guests are Sarah Reinhardt and Louise Brownee Sarah Reinhardt and Louise Browne are the dynamic duo behind the podcast Adoption: The Making of Me. As adoptees themselves, they bring their personal stories and insights in a candid and relatable manner on their own pod. Through their podcast, they aim to unravel the complexities of adoption, offering a blend of humor, empathy, and raw honesty. Sarah and Louise's journey of coming "out of the fog" in real-time adds authenticity and depth to their discussions, making their podcast an invaluable resource for adoptive parents and allies seeking to understand and support their children's experiences. Get ready to dive into their fascinating stories and gain a deeper understanding of adoption through their eyes. And find out more about their podcast's background and hopes for the future. =============== 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== The resources mentioned in this episode are: To listen to the Adoption: The Making of Me podcast, visit their website at adoptionthemakingofme.com, or search for them on your favorite podcast platform. Support the Adoption: The Making of Me podcast on Patreon to help them continue their important work in elevating adoptive voices and providing valuable resources to the adoption community. https://www.patreon.com/themakingofmepodcast Come meet Sarah and Louise in New York for a meet-and-greet before Rebecca Autumn Sansom's and Liz DeBetta's Operation Fog Lift NYC Edition on February 2-4, 2024. Here are some of the books that were mentioned in the episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier Journey of the Adopted Self by Betty Jean Lifton The Baby Thief: The Untold Story of Georgia Tann, the Baby Seller Who Corrupted Adoption by Barbara Bisantz Raymond Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ Adoptee-Therapist Directory: https://growbeyondwords.com/adoptee-therapist-directory/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamped summary of this episode: 00:00:00 - Introducing the Guests Beth introduces the guests, Sarah Reinhardt and Louise Browne, who co-host the podcast Adoption: The Making...

"Today really is the solidified decision is that I'm going to quit marijuana for...not forever, but for one day at a time. That's how people should look at it. You don't have to, but that's how I'm looking at it, to keep myself afloat." -- Joe Nakao Unraveling Adoption's co-creator Joe Nakao catches us up on his journey to achieve personal growth and to heal his cannabis addiction, seeking support and understanding along the way. In this episode, you will be able to: Understand the derailing effect of cannabis addiction Unravel the impact of genetic factors on adoptive individuals' addiction. Embrace the importance of self-compassion and support in addiction recovery. Explore the benefits of online support groups in addiction recovery. My special guest is my dear son, Joe Nakao As a co-creator of this podcast, Joe brings a personal and relatable touch to the discussion. He bravely shares his journey of addiction recovery and healing, shedding light on the complexities of his experiences as a transracial adoptee. Joe's candid and insightful reflections offer a valuable perspective on the challenges of overcoming addiction, making him an authentic and credible voice for individuals on similar paths. 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX The resources mentioned in this episode are: Check out the community calendar at unravelingadoption.com/calendar for continuously-updated support groups, including specific groups for adoptees and addiction. Here's a Filtered view of the Addiction-specific events on the Community Calendar: https://airtable.com/app2ZqjhAS6xbLNBt/shrcW41MlAT0Bivrx Join the interactive workshop How to Change Well on Zoom on Monday, January 8, 2024, at 4pm PST / 7pm EST. The workshop focuses on gracefully and intentionally making changes in your life. The cost is $20.24, and Patreon supporters receive a 50% discount on live events, including this workshop. Register at howtochangewell.eventbrite.com. Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION Timestamped summary of this episode: 00:00:00 - Introduction and New Year Update Beth introduces the episode and her son, Joe, who shares his recent achievements, such as getting his driver's permit and enrolling in college. Joe also discusses his struggles with substance abuse and mental health. 00:04:21 - Impact of Substance Abuse Joe discusses the negative effects of marijuana on his life, including memory problems and lack of motivation. He and his mom also reflect on how self-medication with marijuana as a transracially adopted teen makes sense. 00:10:31 - Influence of Supplements on Recovery Joe attributes a portion of his ability to pursue recovery to the supplements he has been taking that were prescribed after his genetic testing. These supplements have helped him feel more focused and engaged in tasks that he would have previously avoided. 00:11:32 - Embracing Change and Self-Discovery Joe expresses a newfound determination to make positive changes in his life. He acknowledges the need to go deeper in his healing process and emphasizes the importance of making the decision to pursue sobriety from within. 00:13:57 -...