Krynoid PodCast

We're used to looking at a screen and seeing dodgy creatures attacking a pair of plucky adventurers. With Carnival of Monsters, you can watch other folk doing the same thing. It's like Gogglebox with grey aliens. Can a chota peg really solve any behemoth-based problem? How easy is it to drug-mule a set of skeleton keys? How many seconds were spent making the Functionary masks and how much change did they get out of a pound note? And were Jim and Martin amused by the miniscope or did it leave them colder than an Inter Minor welcome? Listen to find out! This episode can also be found at iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Audible and all other podcatchers (as far as we know). You can also find us on Facebook, Threads, Bluesky and Mastodon (but we've exited X - far too Musky for our tastes these days). Thanks for listening!

The Krynoid PodCast boys welcome you back to the Green Cathedral this Yuletide to offer you perhaps the closest thing to a pantomime that '60s Who gets, The Underwater Menace. What the heck is the Doctor wearing and why? Is the rest of the Atlanteans' male grooming as lax as their eyebrows? How will Polly's groovy new gills go down on the swinging King's Road? And did this soggy saga float Jim and Martin's boats or was it like watching a shipwreck? Listen to find out! This episode can also be found at iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Audible and all other podcatchers (as far as we know). You can also find us on Facebook, Threads and Bluesky (but we've exited X - far too Musky for our tastes these days). Thanks for listening and Happy Holidays!

We return to Who with a tale of secret enemies, ostentatious acting and stentorian asides. Will the Keeper ever escape his shower cubicle? Will aubergines ever replace Rice Krispies? Will Tom Baker ever wipe his nose? And will The Keeper of Traken give Jim and Martin a new lease of life or leave them calcified? Listen to find out! 00:00 Intro and context 04:56 A walkthrough of the story 1:22:06 A review of the story 2:10:48 Summing up and scores This episode can also be found at iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Audible and all other podcatchers (as far as we know). You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter. Thanks for listening!

Jim and Martin spring a festive surprise with some new Krynoid PodCast material! They scan the snowless Snowdonian slopes for monstrous myths and find the Doctor giving an old friend a bell, Victoria repeating herself and Jamie threatening everyone with a bagpipe recital. But did The Abominable Snowmen thaw their cockles or do they give it the cold shoulder. Listen to find out! 00:00 Intro and context 07:38 A walkthrough of the story 1:15:15 A review of the story 2:08:18 A discussion of the animation 2:13:46 Summing up and scores This episode can also be found at iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Audible and all other podcatchers (as far as we know). You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter. Merry Christmas and have a wonderful 2023!

Jim and Martin are returning to podcasting... with a surprising plot twist. Listen here or on Spotify.

An announcement on the future of the Krynoid PodCast.

So it’s time to go home for Andy Pandy fangirl, Sarah Jane Smith. And there’s a hand pulling the strings in this show too, giving tupperware a bad name and Professor Watson a bad day at the power plant. Handily, crystalline cosmic crook Eldrad can reform herself from her moribund mitt and then she herself suffers from a wandering hand from her leading man. For a change, we leave a quarry to land on an alien planet where ‘she’ becomes a ‘he’, the decibel level rockets and he – and the serial – fall off a cliff. But is it OK to fancy Eldrad? How many (if any) puerile ‘ring’ jokes should be allowed in one podcast episode? And do Jim and Martin think The Hand of Fear deserves a thumbs up? Or do they give it the finger? Listen and you might get an answer to some or none of the above. The lads also review the brand new audiobooks of Dalek and The Crimson Horror! Also available on Spotify.

Welcome to The Fun Factory: trespassers will be self-prosecuted. The Valeyard (aka The Flaw Doctor) makes the most of a unique Time Lord feature and gives his own SJW predecessor a right legal leathering on Space Station SFX. But they still find time for trips to Camber Quicksands and Popplewick’s House of Exploding Quills, where the waiting room is spacious but gives you that sinking feeling. The Doctor quotes, the Master gloats and Glitz dotes on bank notes, while the Keeper is not averse to the odd slide tackle to protect his Panatropic Net (even though Mel always aims for row Z). But did Jim and Martin find The Ultimate Foe ultimately forgettable or a worthy way to end an era? Listen to find out. The lads also review the audiobooks of The Krotons and The Curse of Fenric. Also available on Spotify.

You may think life can’t get much worse at the moment but locked-down Brexity Britain looks positively idyllic compared to Blighty under the rubber skirt of Dalek rule. This septic isle is overrun with motorised dustbins, headphone-wearing dullards who’ve really let themselves go and the most unrealistic pet since K9. The Doctor falls on his coccyx, Susan falls in love, Ian falls out of a door and Babs falls in with a rough crowd and TWOKs a dustcart. Luckily, a fratricidal fellow rebel lends two hands and Mr Rumbold lends his ears but the perma-grumpy Mrs Briers fails to stop Babs succumbing to crones. Would you buy a used mattress from a Dalek? Is the entry exam for the Roboman Academy too difficult? How many floating corpses would it take to put you off a glass of water? And did Jim and Martin find The Dalek Invasion of Earth to be a glorious triumph or a misbegotten folly? Listen to find out! The lads also review the audiobooks of Fury From The Deep and The Awakening. Also available on Spotify.

What could be more fun at Christmas than a Punch and Judy show? Almost anything, of course, but perhaps even puppety domestic violence is preferable to mental subservience to an ancient evil. This is the lot of tetchy Tegan, who’s red in tooth and eye again, but at least she gets to spread the hate with an embryonic Doc Martin this time around. Nyssa cosplays a deckchair and the Doctor indulges in some heavy breathing, while Mr Sladen is forced to reflect on the viability of his shoddy little booth. Lon’s special dress is even shorter than his temper but not as skimpy as his mum’s interest in Ambril’s antiques. But did Jim and Martin find Snakedance becoming or did they conclude that that’s not the way to do it? Listen to find out! The lads also review the audiobooks of The Mark of the Rani and The Pyramids of Mars. Also available on Spotify.

When is a talkative chair not a talkative chair? When it’s an alien shower curtain. Or a stumpy git in a pith helmet. But, underwhelming as they are, the Vardans still plan an Invasion of Time by conquering pound-shop Gallifrey – a land of medicinal jelly beans, powerful ping pong balls and walnut-chomping dropouts. Its denizens include Chancellor Borusa who’s more put-upon than Tom Baker’s beer mat and Castellan Kelner who’s slimier than a newly-painted Myrka. And, of course, a prototype Romana who’s qualified to wield a screwdriver but can’t hack it in the university of life, even with a bumper pack of Giant Smarties at her side. The Doctor shouts, K9 snarks and Leela shacks up with an innocent bystander, while the surprise Sontarans stomp about, searching in vain for a jellied eels stall. But did Jim and Martin find the story an all-conquering triumph or was it just an unwelcome invasion of their time? Listen to find out. The lads also review the audiobooks of The Doomsday Weapon and The Edge of Destruction. Also available on Spotify.

Scream if you want to leave faster! That seems to be Victoria’s tactic as she sobs, whimpers and shrieks her way out of the show in Fury From The Deep. Indeed, old Leather Lungs’ prodigious output is harnessed to harass some killer kelp and make its human puppets less weedy – even beating the expert man-mismanager John Robson for decibels in the process. Jamie opts out of a foam party and, for a change, it’s the Doctor who can’t control his chopper. Meanwhile, Mr Wint and Mr Kidd need to rethink their dental hygiene regimes and Perkins would be better off seeking his raison d’etre than searching for a spouse. Has Maggie Harris been at the Mother’s Ruin? Does the new animation place the story deeper within the long arms of the lore? And did Fury From The Deep sweep Jim and Martin along or leave them beached on the shores of ennui? Listen to find out. The lads also review the audiobooks of The Dominators and Dragonfire. Also available on Spotify.

A museum? On a planet, you say? Amazingly, that’s just where TARDIS brings Doctor Who and chums in The Space Museum. But the problems here are worse than an expensive gift shop, a blocked urinal or a coach party of feral school kids. For the planet Xeros is occupied by the moaning Morocks, a race only slightly less pathetic than the indigenous teenage beatniks, among whom subjugation raises barely/only an eyebrow. And our plucky travellers have problems of their own, chiefly their future starring roles in the most boring tourist attraction since the financially disastrous Sensorites’ Sexy Sashes exhibition. Our heroes deal with the trauma in their own individual ways though, with the Doctor kipping for an episode, Vicki stirring up the students, Babs having a smoke break and Ian chewing her cardigan. Will the time travellers evade their fate? Would you buy a used glass from Vicki? What day is Nude Day on the TARDIS? And did Jim and Martin find themselves informed and entertained by The Space Museum or is it just a dusty old relic? Listen to find out! The lads also review the audiobooks of The Curse of Peladon and Image of the Fendahl. You can also find this and many other Krynoid PodCast episodes on Spotify.

A bit of holiday advice from the Green Cathedral: better a staycation in Blighty than a sojourn on Uxarieus, a planet more miserable than Raymond Cusick at a Dalek memorabilia auction. But this monochrome blob of clay is surprisingly sought after, with hairy hippies and corporate breadheads alike fighting to the death over it. And perhaps the indigenous residents might even feel they have a claim to the land. Not that anyone cares about that, of course. As well as providing mud, rain and a single flower, Uxarieus offers a mother lode of the very mineral that the twelvty squillion residents of 25th Century Earth desperately need and the very eff-off WMD the Master evilly craves. So, to this end, the future Rev Magister pretends to be an Adjudicator while the wiggy Cap'n Dent tries to put the willies up the colonists with rubbish robots and home videos of his pet gecko. Throw in a crap puppet, prune-faced priests, over-Botoxed primitives and a prescient nod to a taboo TV host and we have something of a carnival of monsters. But did Jim and Martin warm to the wet February clay pit that is the Colony In Space or did it leave them colder than Terry Walsh's wobbly bits? Listen to find out! We also review the audiobooks of The Cybermen and Paradise Towers. Find us on Spotify too. Listener feedback for this story can be found here.

As travel restrictions relax, maybe it’s time to give Cully’s Adventures Unlimited a whirl? His ship’s a bit of a squeeze but the elderly Lothario can secretly sail you to the enticing Island of Death with its distinctive countryside, prestigious museum and friendly fellow tourists, The Dominators. Their Quarks are as cheesy as they sound – and they sound ridiculous. Nevertheless they’re more than capable of duffing up the docile Dulkians, who are wetter than a Sea Devil’s shower cap. TV’s Brian Cant offers some resistance for a while but then departs for a smoke so it’s up to Jamie, Zoe, the Doctor and some other bloke dressed as the Doctor to save the day. But what the heck is a rob’t? Will Rago and Toba ever seek marriage guidance? What did Cully witness when Jamie climbed that ladder? And did The Dominators recharge Jim and Martin’s batteries or leave them as demoralised as a person pretending to be a dummy of a person? Listen to find out! Also available on Spotify.

Many of you may still be locked up with your family but, with any luck, your house-mates don’t include a glowing alien skull, a gun-toting Teuton and a creepy occultist. Even Benylin Bandersnatch’s mum would be of little comfort, haunted as she is by a noisy, slimy creature (named Adam Colby). The TARDIS team come to the rescue but K9’s lost his voice, Leela’s lost some of her hair and the Doctor’s lost his ability to distinguish Jelly Babies from Liquorice Allsorts. Luckily, the Tylers (not those Tylers!) are on hand to dispense cake, rock salt and Mummerset premonitions. But did Image of the Fendahl give Jim and Martin a burst of primal power or suck out their collective life-force? Listen to find out! We also review the audiobooks of The Five Doctors and The Daemons. Also available on Spotify.

Feeling trapped in your home with limited entertainment and an uncertain world outside? Well maybe you can sympathise with the residents of Paradise Towers – a horrible high-rise housing low-rent war machines, an apparently tin Hitler, omnivorous OAPs and TV’s most amateur and least dramatic junior AmDram group. The Doctor wants answers, Mel wants a dip and Kroagnon wants a mass eviction order. Familiarly, it’s reds versus blues with the yellows invisible (robot crabs included). So did Paradise Towers build Jim and Martin’s happiness high or did they feel unalive by the end of it all? Listen to find out! Also available on Spotify

As our next episode (Paradise Towers) will be later than usual and as many of you will have more time than usual to kill, we’ve dredged up something from our past as a piece of additional Lockdown content. Back in March 2017, the Blue Box Podcast kindly invited us and others to contribute to their 250th episode. We weighed in with a 20 minute review of the 1993 Children in Need charity special, Dimensions in Time. You can watch Dimensions in Time here. If you didn’t catch our review first time around, or would like to here it again, here it is. Also available on Spotify. All the Blue Box Podcasts can be found on iTunes, etc. but, as you may know, the team have since regenerated into the Strangers in Space podcast – well worth subscribing to and also available on iTunes. Stay safe.

With all of us seeing rather too much of our immediate locales at the moment, what better time to come with us on a voyage through old Cathay? That said, our TARDIS team may have preferred to self-isolate from their travelling companions – a thieving Venetian and a Machiavellian Mongol. On this trip of a lifetime, our magic caravanners must face frostbite, poisoning, thirst, a surfeit of sand and some interpretive dance. The Doctor gets hysterical, Susan gets a friend, Ian gets a go at cherchez la femme and it all gets a bit dicey for Babs. Will the Doctor ever get back the keys to his caravan? Does the TARDIS carry a dehumidifier? Will the great Kublai Khan resort to Cathayan viagra to escape his wife? And did the trip broaden the minds of Jim and Martin or leave them saddle sore? Listen to find out!

In need of a holiday in these trying times? Where better than Space Fawlty Towers on the nuke-shagged planet of Argolis? Answer: almost anywhere. For The Leisure Hive is a place where reptiles skin up, guests are dismembered and squash players lose their balls. Romana gets a new lab partner, the Doctor gets an old face and K9 regrets his attempt to become a salty sea dog. The First Lady doesn’t bat a green eyelid when her husband spills his seed and dies. Instead she hooks up with her fancy (hu)man, spends a lot of time sprawled on a table and ends up with a baby. Is Pangol Prentis’s apprentice? What girdles do the Foamasi use and where can we get some? And did The Leisure Hive give Jim and Martin a new lease of life or make them feel older than Santa Tom? Listen to find out! Also available on Spotify.