Kvothekiller Chronicles

This is, hands down, the most UNHINGED(derogatory) piece of "worlbuilding" any of us have ever seen The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

This week we finally confirm that Kvothe does NOT know what jacking off is, since if he did, we wouldn't be dealing with all This shit. That's the first tradgedy. The second is that the Adem are culturally unable to podcast. It's so sad. The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

Patrick. Come on now. The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

This week, on KvKc: Patrick writes the boring D&D campaign section of the book, Denna writes the Bohemian Rhapsody of Kvotheworld, Kvothe does extremely cool and sick and awesome Blood Magic crimes, and your hosts announce our new line of Patrick Rothfuss themed lipsticks! The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

The queen died the week this was recorded so we are obviously having a GREAT time!! AND we actually really enjoyed this part of the book! Well. 80% of us did... The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

Can this book get any worse? Yes. Yes it can. But on the bright side we finally found the difference between Will and Sim! The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

CW for sexual assault discussion between 01:05:00 and 01:30:00 You know when you hate someone so everything they do no matter what it is just ends up pissing you off? Like I'm sure there were some good parts in this section but mostly it's just one awful thing after another. What if a book was so horrible towards women it made you non-binary? The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them | Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them | Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck | Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin | Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

We're not quite ready to talk about Wise Man's Fear yet. To prepare ourselves for the horror to come, we try and remember what happened in the last book without looking any of it up. In this episode we discover the hidden sexual delights of the 10 year anniversary cover, Add a 4th quadrant to the "mother/maiden/crone" trifecta, and figure out that the ACTUAL NAME of the wind is "Jasom Derulo" The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss

Well folks, its time to wrap things up. in this last episode of season 1, we go into our final throughts on the book. We conclude that Patrick has undergone Kvothefication, read some goodreads reviews, read the author's note, Answer listener questions, and drop hints about our future plans. We also find out about the wild sex club in the novel Wicked??? Books/Media reccomended in the podcast: Everybody Hates Rand The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. The Podcast on Twitter NB: READ AN ACTUAL GOOD BOOK PLEASE

Choose Life. Choose a university education. Choose a horse. Choose a girl. Choose an accent. No, a different accent. No, no, no, a different accent. Choose Pegs. Choose a dragon but its vegan so actually it's a Draccus. Choose not to do sexual assault. Choose the friendzone. Choose to tell your entire life story to a Chronicler, rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable bar, nothing more than an embarrassment to your own pathetic legacy. Choose The Name of The Wind. Choose Kvothe. The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn, of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, wants you to read Klara and the Sun The Podcast on twitter NB: we already recorded the next episode so you can't actually send in questions

This episode we cover the absolute worst part of the book, and basically everything good we had to say about it gets thrown in the trash by the sheer revolting existence of Chapter 69 (....not nice). We still manage to have a lot of fun along the way though - tune in to hear the 7 words that will make our listeners fall in love with us, hypothesize on the meaning of "fuck me red lipstick" (fuck me, red lipstick?), and ask the most important question of all: When did the sex number invented? WE MADE A TWITTER ACTUALLY! It's @killer_kvothe The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn (formerly known as Lucy), of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, reccomending O Maidens in your Savage Season by Mari Okada NB: Remember to block Pat on Twitter!

This week we get into University!! Congraduations to us!! Wait - why is there a CHILD here?? In our discussion of chapters 26 - 54 we uncover Pat's plagarism of Yugioh GX, explore Arkham Asylum with the Joker, and determine that Fire Emblem Three Houses is the greatest story ever told, using the metric "how many shippable characters are there?". We also cautiously broach the topic of..... "Portrayal of Women in Patrick Rothfuss' Kingkiller Chronicle" (and by cautiously broach i mean 'become justifiably enraged by'). [EDIT: The podcast has a twitter now: @killer_kvothe] The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn (formerly known as Lucy), of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, wants you to please read Olga Tokarczuck NB: This episode contains discussion of sexual assault. Or i should say - more discussion of sexual assault than usual. why is pat Like This.

This week we read chapters 1-25! We meet the Blue Man Group, discover what would happen if a theatre kid was also a gamer, and look frantically to see if there's any actual 'story' inside all these vibes and aesthetics. where is it pat. give us the story patrick. Daniel's audio occasionally cuts out so don't worry its not your phone doing that its the file. [EDIT: The podcast has a twitter now: @killer_kvothe] The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn (formerly known as Lucy), of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, asking you to please read Tokyo Uneo Station NB: This was recorded in january and you can no longer buy Sarah's knitwear products or participate in Summer's insta story RPG. Sorry i took so long to edit this one lads

Before we read any of Name of the Wind, we sit down and discuss the things we remember about it, establishing how Kvothepilled each of us are. We talk about Kvothe a bit but mostly we talk about the topic of Patrick Rothfuss, his relationship to Joss Whedon and... the post. [EDIT: The podcast has a twitter now: @killer_kvothe] The Kvothekillers are played by: Summer, of My Podcabbages - Did the show art and you can comission them! Sarah, of Pod of Greed and Never Believe It - Also did the show art but you cant comission them. Robyn (formerly known as Lucy), of Who Watches the Watch and Fred Says Fuck. Janos, of A Song of Babies and Puppies and Lynchpin. Daniel, from Academic Elitism. NB: This podcast is not suitable for consumption by fans of Mr Rothfuss