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As Michael leaned against the edifice of a vibrantly colored, 18th-century, French-colonial townhouse to relieve himself, he was hardly concerned with the history of the streets where he found himself pissing. The cobblestone-lined corridors of the French Quarter felt like a step back in time. The beautiful, Creole-style architecture had remained relatively unchanged for three centuries. Multicolored houses and steel-framed balconies stayed illuminated by the ominous flickering of the same...

Guard duty was always a bore on base, until this night. I’ll never forget this night. Being an MP mostly consisted of yelling at, and occasionally arresting, drunk assholes on the base. That part at least got my adrenaline (and sometimes blood pressure) running. But by far the worst part was junkyard duty. There was a lot for decommissioned vehicles on the south side off the base. These were bases that had been trashed in fire fights overseas, and damaged beyond any hope of repair. Now...

You were a sailor when I met you, off for one night before heading out again. We spent the night talking about the temperamental seas and the struggles of working in such conditions. As we walked along the shore passing by the dock, we spotted one in the shape of a canoe. Spending time around it, admiring its design you suggested to me if I ever wanted to wait for your return, this could be our meeting spot, you'd always come to look for me here first. Or even if i passed a lonely moment and...

I started my shift fitting my chainmail armor over my clothes. I grab a spear and shield from the weapon’s rack. It’s only after I leave that I realize the shaft of the spear is still stained with goblin blood. What a wonderful start to the day. I can’t do anything about it now. I report to the front gate. The first part of my shift goes by fast. There is a steady flow of merchants and travelers entering the city. No one starts any trouble. It’s just fast-paced enough to keep me...

A passing driver found it on the morning complaint. Well, to be fair, he technically didn’t “find” all of it . . . that came much later. The driver complained about a tarp blocking his commute on a narrow patch of road. He said he had to pull over to the shoulder to avoid the massive, bumpy tarp. The only problem was this particular section of highway didn’t have much in the way of a shoulder - just a foot at most of tan stone before you plunged into the river. On the other side of...

Max awoke with a groan. The piercing sunlight that danced between the blinds had made its way across the bed, bringing him to sit up and grab at the throbbing pain in his head. His eyes were fuzzy and his mouth was dry in a way that seemed only achievable through ingesting sand. Weirder still was the mystery of his pants and underwear which somewhat concerningly seemed to have disappeared. It wasn’t until his eyes finally adjusted to the morning light that his severely hungover brain began...

Let me start by saying I’ve made some bad choices in life. And let me further that thought that expressing that I’ve been the victim of many bad things. Some were a result of the former, while others were simply the result of random bad luck. A combination of the two left me on the streets with no place to go. Generally I found myself sleeping under bridges. To say I preferred it that way was a gross understatement. If I had my preference, I’d curl up in a soft bed with a roof over...

It started last week when I was jogging. We had a series of bad storms in our area. Nothing too out of the ordinary for the Midwest. After all, when you live in a place literally called Tornado Alley, you’re used to the weather turning on a dime. The storm damage wasn’t too bad. It was just a couple of busted windows and a few bent satellite dishes. Nothing a few insurance claims couldn’t fix. Once the temperature started warming up, I donned my workout gear and headed out the door....

Arthur had 10 hours to make words magically appear on the screen in front of him. Somewhere between his 3rd cup of coffee and pulling his hair out, he heard the faint voice of his dead grandmother ringing in his head. “A writer?” she’d ask with fear. “But how will you eat? How will you feed your children? How will you find a woman? Can’t you just go to dental school like your cousin Louis? Or be an accountant like your cousin Stefanie? Or a lawyer like your father? You can write...

I started my day, like any other, by ringing the door spell. A litany of spikes, arrows and swords greeted me. I dodged them as best I could before bending backward to avoid the long reach of the guillotine blade which curved towards my neck level in a climax of blades. While my client had given me the means to disable the security features at the door, they were much too complicated for me to follow. Thus, I decided the best way to get in was simply memorize the pattern of the defenses on...

Abdiel didn’t quite know how it happened. One moment he was soaring through the clouds of the seventh level of heaven, the next he was sitting in a ratty recliner in the middle of a basement in the middle of New Jersey. A bearded man in a stained sleeveless shirt sat opposite of him, with a bag of Cheetos on his lap. At first the man looked every bit as surprised as he did. Then his surprise turned into something else. Pure joy. “I have done it. My ritual has worked! I have summoned the...

It washed up on shore after the last rain. We found it the next morning. Its massive gray form pushed onto the riverbank, its stone skin still being pounded by the mid-morning waves. It was the statue of the troll. As a city official, I was called out to investigate. I couldn’t fathom how it happens. In a lot of ways, I still can’t, even after all this time. The troll statue measured twenty feet tall and fifteen feet wide. It had a big gray nose, pearly teeth perfect for gnashing. The...

I found Don Gustov in the usual place, at his high-end watering house on the East Side. I was roughly ushered into his presence by several of his goons. He looked at me while eating linguini with his bare hands, licking it off his fingers in disgusting fashion. To say Don Gustov was not a small man was like saying the Titanic was not a sailboat. He was a massive man in richly-tailored clothes, flanked by several large, muscular men in suits that seemed barely large enough to hold their...

I hastily assembled my equipment before ducking out of the door. Social media reported a meteor landing several kilometers deep in the woods, approximately ten kilometers from the edge of town. I knew I had to move fast. The government wouldn’t be far behind, and beyond them, the media. In one hand I held a small cooler filled with all the instrumentation I could afford, while in the other, I carried a radiation detector. One couldn’t be too careful. Still, I was determined to get...

The Keepsake was a dimly lit pub on the banks of the Gulber Wick - a waterway that ran through the rugged Shetland Islands of Northern Scotland. A step through the narrow entryway felt like a journey back in time. Its 17th-century infrastructure had remained more or less intact but couldn’t accommodate the wiring for modern electricity. Instead, The Keepsake got by on lanterns and candles fixed upon counters, booths, and tables. It had no specialty cocktails, nor fancy craft brews - just a...

Hunting the dead is a pain in the ass when you’ve skipped leg day. We got the call at 0400 hours. Another outbreak, this time in Pennsylvania. This time it was runners. The entire company groaned. Everyone hated runners. The company dispersed for operational preparations. For my part, I slammed open the locker room door with a frustrated slap. It was bad enough my leave had been canceled due to this shit. I stripped down to my undies and put on my fatigues, followed by flak jacket and...

The fall colors blurred like a kaleidoscope even with my eyes closed. Was I dead? It was an honest question. Nowadays the dead coming back to life was old news. I opened my eyes and looked down on my wrinkles, only to see plenty of liver spots. I was still one of the living. For now. I surveyed the damage from the driver’s seat, observing the front of my car smashed into a tree off the wooded path. My supplies lay scattered throughout the trunk and back seat. I had no idea what kind of...

The clock behind Dr. Selby’s head seemed to move in slow motion. Every appointment started out the same way – he’d ask how I felt, I’d tell him some variation of “fine”, and then complain about something trivial that could be solved with medication or different parents. By the 50th minute of our sessions, we’d reach a point where he’d start reciting things he’d like to discuss for next time and I’d nod as he delivered a profound observation about the way my brain...

“It’s over, Grosbek!” Kestrel’s voice boomed through the sky. “Not while I still live,” I cried. “And you die!” It was a sub-par line - far from my best work - but I had more pressing concerns, like making the drop-off. My archnemesis Kestrel, the hero of Falcon’s Point, streaking across the sky in his brown and white costume. I braced for his impact in midair, my long cape falling just above the rocket boots which kept me suspended seventy feet into the air. The sleek...

I’ll never forget that night. I was still paired with Bob Simmons, a veteran of the force by twenty years. The chief told me he’d seen it all, from riots in Los Angeles to Presidential visits in big cities across the country. I’d learn from him, he told me. That was true, in its own way. In the end, I learned what not to do. It was the last call of the night. We were responding to a noise complaint in the north side of town. This was a quiet, upscale side of town. Older houses...