Screaming in Silence

Balance is required everywhere in life, as Mr Miyagi said, " Whole life have a balance". Nowhere is this more important for me than managing chronic pain. https://onewingkiwi.com/

A lot of people, not just chronic pain patients, struggle to understand why I feel the way I do about life with constant pain and adversity. I've even faced criticism because of my beliefs. Normally I wouldn't address these, but a couple comments recently made me think that I need to explain why I do feel the way I do, in the hope that more people can view adversity from a different perspective. https://onewingkiwi.com/

As the reach of the podcast grows and my activity in pain groups increases I'm getting more requests on my coping strategies, so I decided to put them into one episode so anyone can get a quick overview of how I manage my chronic pain. There will be some old and new concepts here, so something for everyone who is interested. https://onewingkiwi.com/

How can I stay so calm and controlled despite living with chronic pain? How can it be that I can be going through pain that would knock most off of their feet yet you wouldn't tell by looking at me? The secret for me is in understanding the difference between hurt and harm.

Today I'm joined by a strong voice for self-management of chronic pain, Pete Moore from the UK. Pete has developed a process for anyone to use in dealing with persistent pain and attends numerous seminars on pain management internationally advocating his 12 step plan which he details for us towards the end of the episode. Join us to hear his story, how his pain journey started, the support groups he created, the story behind the pain toolkit, his work in Virtual Reality and even his own AI avatar where you can ask him questions online. Pete in turn interviewed me a few days ago and you can find that interview on my website in the Videos section. https://onewingkiwi.com/ https://www.paintoolkit.org/

In this episode I combine the lessons Stoicism teaches us with the lessons I learnt for myself over the past nearly 27yrs. Having only recently discovering for myself this school of thought, I found the writings from such noted philosophers such as Zeno, Seneca, Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius aligned perfectly with what I had taught myself. These have helped me navigate my way successfully through the adversity I have faced and I'm sure can help many others with the obstacles and hurdles life throws us all. https://onewingkiwi.com/

Anxiety, we all have experienced it. For some it's just a normal response to stress or unknown outcomes. For others it can be crippling, trapping them in perpetual worry. But what about the relationship between chronic pain and anxiety surrounding pain. As I found, and learnt to overcome, anxiety can make the pain we feel significantly worse. https://onewingkiwi.com/

On today's episode we are joined by Shaun, a 33yr old BPI survivor from England. Shaun had asked if I could do an episode on becoming a father with a Brachial Plexus injury, and I thought that not only was it a great topic to cover but as he himself was a father to two young boys he should come share his experiences! https://onewingkiwi.com/

On today's episode I'm very lucky to be joined by Dr Sue Jarquin, a pain management psychologist at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center in America. Sue brings a new perspective to the show, drawing on her years of study and experience interacting with chronic pain patients in helping them understand more about pain and self management. https://onewingkiwi.com/ Please check out the new Videos section on my website.

With the first year of the podcast having passed I thought it was an ideal opportunity to reflect on where this all started to where I am now. It's been an amazing journey, one that has helped many, including myself. So thanks to you all, and I look forward to seeing you all again in 2024.

We would all like a cure to our problems, be that chronic pain, disability or any other hurdle in life. But what if there is no cure? Do we dismiss anything that isn't a cure? Too often I've witnessed exactly this. But as I have found, when there isn't a cure it's far better to take any improvement in the quality of life that we can than to take nothing. https://onewingkiwi.com/

Wants. What do I want? What do you want? We all have them, they can drive us to better ourselves or the world we live in. But unrealistic or unobtainable wants can cause emotional and mental struggle, making us more vulnerable to pain. I found that by re-framing my wants I lifted a heavy burden from my shoulders. https://onewingkiwi.com/

How often have you found yourself facing a situation where it feels like you have no choice in the outcome, felt powerless. I found myself in that situation in 1997, facing a life with chronic pain and disability. But my story wasn't written yet, I could still decide the outcome. It was up to me turn the obstacle into opportunity. https://onewingkiwi.com/

Living with chronic pain is something that only around 25% of the worlds population understand properly. If you haven't lived it, there is no way you can understand. So in this episode I share some of the things people with chronic pain would like others to know about. https://onewingkiwi.com/

Often seen as a radical and controversial technique for dealing with chronic pain, I discovered the power of the mind through mindfulness very early on in my journey where other treatments had failed. It wasn't until I exhausted every option that I really began to focus on this technique, and the results are literally life changing for me. And I firmly believe it can offer the same results for almost anyone. https://onewingkiwi.com/

There's a silver lining to every cloud, and my journey has been no exception. There's been some lighthearted moments and unforeseen benefits. In this weeks episode we'll look at some of the pros and cons of my experiences with a brachial plexus avulsion injury. https://onewingkiwi.com/

I first found out about Dan a number of years ago when looking for a sling to support my dead arm. I stumbled across a site where he advertised the slings he made and saw pictures of him competing in sports events and realised he too was someone who hadn't let his injury hold him back. Now thanks to an introduction from Geoff Tolge I get to interview the man behind the slings and so many other achievements. https://onewingkiwi.com/

In my journey I have met people that have misjudged me for my situation, who have incorrectly made assumptions. I have been inconvenienced by others behaviours. We all have experienced that. Even Marcus Aurelius wrote of his difficulty with this. So how can we handle these situations, without anger?

Anticipatory fear, dreading what the future may bring, is a recognised condition. One that can 'paralyse' us. This fear is very often based on past experiences, suffering, hurt and pain. But the future is not yet written, the worst outcome is not guaranteed. There is just as much chance that the future could hold the greatest moments of your life.

Nothing to do with Ghost Busters or Scooby Doo, instead the ghosts of the past that a lot of us, especially those with chronic pain, chase. So often we get caught up in past events, we wish that things went differently, or that we could change outcomes. This episode focuses on the futility of doing so, and why we should embrace the present moment.