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The Quibbler: A Harry Potter Book Club

Books & Literature

A Harry Potter book club for grownups. Heather Price-Wright and Alex Dalenberg make their way through the Harry Potter books, chapter by chapter. We analyze avada kedavra. We dissect Dumbledore. We question quidditch. And we hail Hermione. Join us as we go as deep as you've always wanted to into the books that defined our childhoods. Alohamora—the door is open.

A Harry Potter book club for grownups. Heather Price-Wright and Alex Dalenberg make their way through the Harry Potter books, chapter by chapter. We analyze avada kedavra. We dissect Dumbledore. We question quidditch. And we hail Hermione. Join us as we go as deep as you've always wanted to into the books that defined our childhoods. Alohamora—the door is open.


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A Harry Potter book club for grownups. Heather Price-Wright and Alex Dalenberg make their way through the Harry Potter books, chapter by chapter. We analyze avada kedavra. We dissect Dumbledore. We question quidditch. And we hail Hermione. Join us as we go as deep as you've always wanted to into the books that defined our childhoods. Alohamora—the door is open.






Ep. 98—Dumbles Dore (like Attorneys General)

Pretty annoying to meet the best character in the final act of the final book, but that's the hand we're dealt with G.O.A.T. Aberforth Dumbledore. This week: Ron's hunger makes him stupid(er), we miss dive bars immensely, and a terrible family saga finally sees the light of day. Plus: aspersions of goat … uh … loving. It takes all sorts. This week: The Missing Mirror Next week: The Lost Diadem


Advent Calendar Final Night—A Visit from an Obscure Greek Saint

And to all a good night! This is just us reading aloud to you and cracking wise. Plus an alarming amount of doctrinal history. Because you know you've always wanted to hear us talk about Trinitarians versus the Arian Heresy.


Advent Calendar Week 3—Midnight Sleigh to Candy Town

Ever wonder what it sounds like when someone who has basically never danced "summarizes" a ballet? Wonder no more, because this week we watched the New York City Ballet's streaming production of The Nutcracker! So naturally we talk about ghosts, illicit sexual desire, the problematic ideals of "multiculturalism" in America, and Alex uses the phrase "wild with grief." But also we talk outfits, don't worry. Merry Christmas Eve!


Advent Calendar Week 2—Yosemite Clementine

This one's a bit delayed, as it was something of an emotional gauntlet to edit (you'll hear why in the latter half. Be warned.) We watched the stop-motion Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer TV special and A Charlie Brown Christmas, and we loved one and hated the other. Betcha can't guess which! It does get real toward the end, and we dedicate this episode to everyone spending this season grieving someone beloved. Next time (sometime) will be a little bit… nuttier. ;)


Advent Calendar Week 1—How the Grinch Stole Everything

Spend this very strange holiday season with us, quibbling about the Christmas classics that make us merry and/or cause us to cringe. First up, the ultimate tale of holiday alienation and a master class in Committing to the Bit: The Grinch! Yuletide supervillain or just a guy sick of noise and Amazon packages? We'll be dropping more holiday goodies throughout the rest of the month, so stay tuned! xoxo


Ep. 97—There's Some Horcruxes in This House

This is an 80 minute episode about a 17 minute chapter. The summary is twice the length of the chapter itself. You. Are. Welcome! This week: Heather tells an unfollowable anecdote about animal actors; Alex and Heather both mangle explanations of the social and physical sciences; Alex and Heather ALSO talk about their dreams, for some reason; also there's a Harry Potter chapter with a dragon and maybe some murders, we think? It's a lot. Plus: The Easter egg took us an entire evening to make....


Ep. 96—Pavlov's Dragon

A truly vintage episode in which we actually just quibble for an hour. For example: Do wizards think banks and mines are the same thing? Has Ron seen Borat? If goblins have this extremely handy Thief's Downfall thing for detecting bank robbers, why not put it … at … the entrance? Is Hermione just totally asleep at the wheel here or does she actually think this broke-ass Ocean's Four nonsense will succeed? Why does Griphook open doors so weird? Do they murder Travers? This week chapter:...


The Nibbler 5—Live Free or Twi-hard

It's the spookiest Halloween in a long, long, long time, so we're rewarding (?) you all with a long, long, LONG final episode of The Nibbler. Seriously this thing is gargantuan. What did we even talk about? Dust motes? Child brides? Eternal sleeplessness? Accidentally becoming full, un-ironic fans of this series despite the fact that it barely qualifies as having a plot? ALL OF IT AND MORE. Plus: Freaked out forgers, vampire fat acceptance, unqualified obstetricians, and more, more more....


Ep. 95—Gender Revelio!

The One Where We Alienate Most of our Remaining Listeners Who Still Like Harry Potter. Kidding-ish, but this is the first one recorded post-Rowling screed(s), so yeah, we get into it a bit. Also, some of Bill's best friends are goblins, heterosexual marriage cures Lupin of … being old and tired? and Ron makes every bad-faith devil's advocate argument you could ever hope to find on Reddit. And we learn about art history a little bit! This week's chapter: Shell Cottage Next week's chapter:...


Movie Mini 7—Creature Feature Creep

We very irrationally still call these "minis," but at any rate, let's ease back into the Potterverse by discussing the surprisingly fun—considering all the death, despair, camping, etc.—first installment of the Deathly Hallows films! This week, the Grangers are definitely about a month from being charged with murdering their daughter; two Death Eaters go deep undercover in coveralls; Ron has bad-news snowblindness; Lucius loses his very cool and manly wand-holder thingie; and Dobby Voice...


Ep. 94—Large Elder Wand Collider

OK, so we're (still) doing this. We recorded before a lot of real-world shit went down, which is just the way of things these days, but we still managed to talk about Ibram X. Kendi and class warfare. Very on-brand. Also this week, Ron eulogizes poorly; Fleur-ence Nightingale nurses an enormous number of people back to health; Griphook expresses correct and healthy skepticism of so-called "ally" wizards; and Greg uses the elder wand for SEO. Damn it, Greg. Plus: Grief. This week's chapter:...


Summary Supercut: Sorcerer's Stone

As promised, and because you gorgeous people raised THOUSANDS of dollars in the last 2 weeks for bail funds, criminal justice reform, affordable legal services, community health organizations, local and national Black Lives Matter affiliates, and more, here are all the summaries of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, spliced together. Here's what we learned: 1) WOW the early audio was bad; how did anyone get through this? 2) We used to do these way faster, and with remarkably few...


Ep. 93—Fenrir Payback

In which we finally and totally dispense with the notion that these are chapter "summaries." So much Manor action, so little time! This week, Fenrir stirs up some stereotypes, Bellatrix has a "cool girl villain" accessory, Death Eater Nation is essentially a failed state, Scabbers finally snuffs it, and Dobby dies with his socks on. Plus: Draco Malfoy, Meme Lord. This week's chapter: Malfor Manor Next week's chapter: The Wandmaker


Quibbler After Hours: Mr. Lupin's Opus

Happy Teacher Appreciation Week! Let's talk teachers. Why are the best lessons in the entire series taught by a supervillain? Why does Hagrid get to just like, introduce monsters and see what happens? Why doesn't everyone have to take arithmency, which seems like wizard math? Be honest, is astronomy really astrology, and if so, can I sign up? How does Ron know how to write his name? Why isn't there art class? Who in god's name put Albus Dumbledore in charge? Is anyone reviewing these lesson...


Ep. 92—Pod Save the Wizarding World

This episode is a lot of us patting ourselves on the back about how good podcasts are. Not ours, necessarily; mostly Lee Jordan's. We would for sure listen to his podcast. This week, Hermione gets an iota of the credit she's due; Harry has hallows mania; Remus has an extremely underwhelming alias; Ron sort of agrees with everyone; and Alex lectures us on strong passwords. Plus: Very little talk about the Virus that Must Not be Named. This week's chapter: The Deathly Hallows Next week's...


Ep. 91—Hallows Be Thy Name

Podcasting in the time of pestilence … hope you're all hanging in there and prepared to use some of your potentially ample alone time to TALK ABOUT DEATH. Sorry, the timing of this one is weird, but yeah, it's a lot about death. And what shoes Death might wear. And what pants. And impossible moral choices in times of crisis. And the need to believe in something. And Patrick Stewart, a bit. Plus: Does Hermione actually believe in magic? This week's chapter: The Tale of the Three Brothers Next...


Ep. 90—Chekhov's Erumpent Horn

If a crumple-horn snorcack appears in the first act … well, you know the drill. This week, Potter Productivity becomes a thing; so does #Rontent; Hermione reads in bed and that's an actual scene in this book, like a whole page of that; Xenophilius gets his Infowars on; and we wonder whether J. K. believes that all writers are trash. Plus: An easter egg that took forever. This week's chapter: Xenophilius Lovegood Next week's chapter: The Tale of the Three Brothers


Ep. 89—Deer Is Headlights

Ron is back! Hurray, we guess? Nah, it's good to have him around for rage fodder if nothing else. This week: Harry has learned nothing from Snake Corpse; nobody knows what Stan Shunpike looks like; Ron, admittedly, performs an act of daring and heroism, and gets a taste of what Harry's full entire life consists of; Hermione resembles Galadriel; and we get two thin, small-featured blonde actresses hilariously confused. Plus: a candle no one asked for. This week's chapter: The Silver Doe Next...


Ep. 88—The Monster Book of Twitter Monsters

Skip to 37:00 if you don't want to listen to us talk about being social justice warriors. Seriously, don't say we didn't warn you. This week, the tweet heard 'round the world, Harry's boulevard of broken nonsense Dumbledore gave him, the vagaries and idiocies of youth, but also the wonderful intensity of being a 17-year-old, and another mystifying character age discrepency. Plus: Heather says both the words "aunt" and "Grindlewald" differently in every sentence. This week's chapter: The Life...


Muppet Mini: Marley & Marley & Cratchit & Scrooge & Rizzo

We barely scratched the surface of this shining paragon of filmmaking (The Muppet Christmas Carol), but here's a little holiday treat that has little to do with Harry Potter. Don't worry, though—we do sort the Muppets. Plus, the joys of strange background puppets, Michael Caine's virtuostic chemistry with his felt fellow performers, Beaker giving Scrooge that teensy red scarf, and a moment of appreciation for the best cinematic band, Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem. Happy whatever it is...