Elis James and John Robins

It’s T-2 until Marathon Day. The trainers are being laced. The talc is being applied. And the Ass Magic is getting to work. This is the pre-game build up. That half an hour where Carragher and Neville talk about a variety of hypotheticals. Do you find the marathon talk boring? Well it’s what we’re doing, so ‘jog on’. But that does mean we’re getting very close to the final boss of Running To Win and Hating Yourself. And whisper it quietly, but no matter how he gets on this weekend, the John who used to hate exercise should be very proud of how far he’s come. But it’s not a marathon, it’s a decathlon... of content. Those events include: John crying at a dating show, Elis not getting Buddhism, and eating 6 baked potatoes in 24 hours. Got anything for us? Well ping it over to hello@elisandjohn.com For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Two towering national figures dominate today’s podcast; bloobs and David Attenborough. Bloobs because John has realised he lives in heaven and he backs the Chilterns. Attenborough because John’s been watching his new (filthy) TV show and Elis has been having nightmares about knocking him down the stairs. Three other culturally significant totems also feature: First there’s the new DG who meets John (in a show intro that Elis labels ‘a real case study into the workings of John’s mind’). Then there’s Steve Coogan and his historic aggressive vibing with Robins. And thirdly, and probably most importantly, there’s the Cymru Connection. Elis has a new approach to reaching 50%, and all he needs is a complete list of all of Wales’s teachers… If you were looking for a means to interact with the show, then look no further than the medium of email. Send your bits to hello@elisandjohn.com. For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Huge news. Elis has nearly got into a fight. He nearly lamped a bloke because he confused Llanfairfechan with Penmaenmawr*. Of course he didn’t. Rather he was being a stand up citizen protecting this nation’s highways. But heroism doesn’t pay, because it’s also time for the semi-regular spousal Elis James rinse. Isy's been talking about Elis on other platforms, which means great insight for us all. What is he like away from the limelight of one of the UK’s most megatised podcasts? Until what time every morning is he in his boxers? Does he really quote football cliches to his wife? Elsewhere, could we record John’s therapy sessions for bonus content? Does Adrian Chiles like swimming? And there’s massive stuff going down in the Rodders-Winter Universe. *In all fairness they’re right next to each other on the A55. Whatever it is you've got send it to hello@elisandjohn.com. For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Quick hypothetical Q: If you’re running a marathon for the first time (because you’ve realised your bones actually aren’t too heavy to run) and you want to get advice from someone, who do you turn to? Roger Bannister? Not possible. Forrest Gump? Not possible again. Oh, what about the world class athlete who held the record for the fastest women's marathon for 16 years? What, Paula Radcliffe? Yeah, just a bit mate! Strap in for some gold-plated advice from one of the best to ever do it. Elsewhere Elis has been Cymru Connecting like there’s no tomorrow. He’s going back to the 60s, he’s getting maiden names confirmed, he’s Derren Browning wedding guests who haven’t even asked for it. Can his midweek connecting help his in-game performance? Lastly Dave drops the bombshell that he’s got guinea pigs, but don’t worry, he hasn’t got lad ones. If you’re enjoying what you’re hearing/seeing and want to get involved, you can! Via the magical medium of email. Just send your bits and bobs to hello@elisandjohn.com. For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Elis has a hot chest and feels spacey, whilst John’s got his thrice a decade hay fever, which is a real problem now he’s in full vis. So that’s a great start to the second ever Megatisation era episode. Today’s a day for big questions, including and not limited to… Are their filthcentric studio sharers the antichrist? Has John nearly completed YouTube? Can he also win an Oscar with his sizzling bath content? Would you queue for a curry house before it opens in the mid afternoon? Do you like prawns? And where’s your mate? All questions answered within. And if this is the carbs to fill you up at the start of a great big Elis and John buffet well the high [production] cost protein afterwards can be found over on our new Patreon. Bonus content in the bath and the first ever Adventure of Elis and John are on patreon.com/elisandjohn. And do go through the website rather than the app so that you avoid extra app charges! And the sweet dessert of the buffet, this week’s Bureau will arrive only / exclusively on BBC Sounds on Saturday morning. To get in touch contact via our brand new email hello@elisandjohn.com For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a big/normal day! Everything in Elis and John world just got bigger/stayed exactly the same as before! All praise the Brave New World/status quo! John’s dressed up in a suit and tie to mark the (non-) occasion, and there’s a 100 points on offer to the listener who can decipher John’s scripted intro. Beyond everything changing/staying exactly the same, Elis and John try to find the best non-threatening noise to make whilst running to alert non-runners, with some very surprising suggestions. Elis tries to pick himself up after last week’s missed shot at glory in the Cymru Connection, plus there’s a return to a glorious sub-category of Mad Dads: milk. One thing that definitely has changed is the Elis and John spiritual home: the email hub. You can now contact the show by sending your correspondence to hello@elisandjohn.com. For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Emergency! Emergency! Elis and John just got Megatised. We repeat, Elis and John just got Megatised. PATREON VIBES IN THE AREA Our brand new Patreon channel will feature our flagship offering of The Adventures of Elis and John - a monthly visualised series too daring for TV that will feature excursions, activities and escapades from our favourite todgers. Subscribers will also get fully visualised podcast eps, behind-the-scenes action, first dibs on EJJR tour tickets and ad-free listening. Each tier offers the exact same content with our 'pay-what-you-can' scheme. To subscribe head to patreon.com/elisandjohn. WE HAVE A BRAND NEW YOUTUBE CHANNEL Subscribe at YouTube.com/@elisandjohn for twice-weekly episode highlights on our brand new YouTube channel! AS YOU WERE If you like what you like, fear not! You can continue to listen to the podcast wherever you like, the Bureau de Change of the Mind remains exclusive to Sounds and we’ll still be on 5 Live every Friday afternoon. CONTACT THE SHOW Our brand new email address is hello@elisandjohn.com. WE’RE ON THE SOCIALS We have brand new accounts! Follow and subscribe.. Instagram.com/elisandjohn Facebook.com/elisandjohn tiktok.com/@elisandjohn For all other info, head to elisandjohn.com The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Strap yourself in because boy do we have a highbrow show for you today. Quoting Heidegger? Check. Ruminations on the nature of the present? Check. Elis S’ing himself in a park in Cardiff after a night on the Red Bull mixers? Check. John Wins Again throws up some interesting morsels: John reveals his latest bedtime snack, and one of John’s wins leaves Elis literally speechless. Elsewhere we meet Elis’s unkempt uni alter ego, John realises he should have been born in a Megaworld, and Dave is invited to get into the early human scene. To get in touch with the show, email hello@elisandjohn.com. For lots of exclusive EJJR #content, join our Patreon at patreon.com/elisandjohn. For weekly visual highlights, head to youtube.com/@elisandjohn. For everything else, head to elisandjohn.com. The Elis James and John Robins Show is a Significant Production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a rollercoaster of a show for Elis James. He has the opportunity to rectify recent Welsh footballing disappointment by becoming the only player in Cymru Connection history to connect with 5 people twice. National pride can be restored, as long as Elis opens his eyes and doesn’t go down a Cymru cul-de-sac. Come on El, a (potentially imaginary) listener’s haircut depends on it! Plus John plays hardball with the One Show, there’s a trip down the Shame Well that knocks Elis bandy, and Dave finally reveals what he’s known for turning up to parties with… Send in your whats and wares to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

“You were hungover thinking about darts.” “You are scum.” “You are a waste that has wasted himself.” “How do you like that John?” “Why don’t you just melt in the park you never walked through enough 21 years ago?” “You complete piece of S.” From that exchange you wouldn’t think it would be a philosophical episode. However it is. It's deep. It’s a privilege, despair, sadness, nostalgia fest. And for once, the despair isn’t coming from John. You’ve got the Bosnians to thank for that. It’s also Edin Dzeko’s fault as to why Elis is dressed as a man who runs a community farm. Elsewhere Dave gets some coaching off a much speedier runner, John couldn’t leave his bed because he had an enjoyable visit to his old university college, and we have a reappraisal of Mellowship Slinky in B major. And finally, do we have a companion podcast to ‘A History of Nudity in a Thousand Beautiful Women with John Robins’? Because, after all, you simply must have two episodes a week these days. Get your Bureau when it’s piping hot on Saturday mornings, only on BBC Sounds, and if you want to drop anything down into our digital postal chutes then wang it over to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

Elis has come off the back of a midi week but that’s not a problem, because the hive mind has another great TV format to which the networks can say “I love it, so I’m going to say ‘no’.” ‘John’s Thoughts’ arrives much to Elis’s confusion, during which John’s also come up with an emotion that’s more complex than nostalgia. “What is this?” asks the Assistant to a Thought Leader about the feature. We don’t quite know yet but it is certainly a great conduit for chin wagging chat. And in all of that we’ve got a belting Made Up Game which really plays to the boys’ experience in indie commercial digital radio. It’s elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk if you’ve got a game that could wet our whistles.

It’s all Hits and Mems today as we imagine two media worlds that John Robins could have inhabited. These being: Bristol local radio (1-4pm) and the manosphere. Traffic, travel and the afternoon countdown to the pub, or grifting? Two forks in the road he could have gone down, but thankfully hasn’t. Safe to say his imagination is in fervent overdrive as we also hear of a world where he has $10 million… and won an Oscar. But what of Elis? Well he may have a heart attack. We also receive a right of reply from a disgraced Global Radio employee trying to clear his name, and there’s an all time great Mad Dad story of a father in a cultural vacuum. Do you possess anything mildly amusing which could pique our interest? Well elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk is the place to send it. And do get on the blooming Bureau on a Saturday why don’t you?

The confidence of one of the great confidence players takes a battering this week. What starts off as some light-hearted fun around the London Marathon (after Johnny JR reveals some exciting news), turns into a head-in-hands moment that curses Elis for the entirety of today’s show. How does his misstep affect his Cymru Connecting performance? Will the unassailable points gap in Made Up Games get even more unassailable? It’s all to play for. Elsewhere, John’s imagined a world that almost leaves him in tears, and there’s a TV-worthy MUG that’s more tense than this show’s compliance meeting with BBC bosses after hearing John’s supermarket docu-drama last week… You can contribute to the Elis and John canon by emailing elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

The studio is wafting with sandalwood and intense male musk because Dave’s got a new scent, something which is causing John much nasal fascination. But yet again, the big story is a huge Elis James week. What a run he’s on by the way. He’s had a completely genuine standing ovation at one of London’s coolest comedy gigs. Further still, he’s performed the finest bit of house jobbery he’s ever done, with plumbing tape elevating this above Mega Week. Elsewhere, Adrian brings the boys some significant crispy content and John’s even sacking people who no longer work with him. We also have potentially our most round about chat ever in addressing some correspondence. From cumin and white pepper into the meaning of creativity to horses and penguins, back to the email. Want to add to the larder of email content? Well get it to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk And do check out Saturday’s Bureau for crying out loud. Only on BBC Sounds.

John Robins feels enormous. His Christmas Day, Ryder Cup and Tax Deadline Day have all come at once. That’s right, a new supermarket has opened near his house, and he’s primed and ready to make content that no one else would dream of making. Strap in for some gonzo journalism; it’s Fear and Loathing in Rural Bucks. Supermarket excitement aside, we tackle the big questions: Did Elizabeth I wish she’d had meal deals? Did she resent not having a fridge, or Tetris, or yoghurt? What would Henry VIII have made of an air fryer? Plus, Elis’s Welshness gets him in hypothetical hot water. Get in touch via the world’s most reliable medium: email. It’s elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

What do Sir Steve Redgrave, Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Nelson Mandela, Gandhi, David Beckham and John Robins have in common? None of them were asked on QI. Elis has though, and it’s clearly going down very very well with all parties. But today feels significant as we rope in a special guest to digest Elis hammering his friend using his fast twitch fibres. On top of that, John’s having a big day - something which others seriously doubt. “He’s probably just had too much hot sauce on his scrambled egg,” cries Dave. Wrong! In fact he’s being texted by a ghost curry house. Elsewhere the boys ask Adrian *all* the questions you’ve ever wanted to know, and we get a bit nostalgic as John talks of the only cool thing he’s ever done. Email us on elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk Remember, the Bureau is available Saturday morning *only on* BBC Sounds.

John is not going to dance to their tune. Who’s tune? The people who design the layouts of supermarkets, that’s who. Sure, they can play their seductive little ditties, but Johnny JR ain’t dancing. But someone who is dancing to a tune is Elis James, and that tune is Welsh music (general). With St David’s Day having just passed, the pressure is on Elis to contribute to the national mood. Can he turn around a poor run of form in the Cymru Connection, or will he besmirch the good name of Wales around its big day? Elsewhere, Elis dives headfirst into a cognitive decline casserole, the boys riff a future award-winning feature on the fly, and we take a welcome trip back down the Shame Well. Send in your missives to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

Elis is in the middle of a megaweek. He’s about to do a 100m race for charity that he wishes could be 18 yards, he’s been to 10 Downing Street because Sir Keir is in love with him, and he’s been accosted by a roomful of Welsh people wanting to connect with him. But amongst all this he has also been betrayed. For there was a Paul McCartney-based event that he wasn’t invited to, despite another member of the team making the guest list. But what about John? He’s been doing what he does everyday; checking the price of Bitcoin. This despite not ever having owned any. Plus, there’s an update on the WhatsApp community and another cap in the feather of the world’s greatest invention; e-mail. If you want to get in touch via this great unparalleled medium, then send your messages to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

Elis has Barrel of Eggs’ed it. Or more accurately, Isy has. The new car has met its match in the form of inner-London carpark tight corners. But for a show that holds content on the highest pedestal possible, this can only be seen as a good thing. Not only has Elis got a damaged car, but he also has a damaged connection rate in the Cymru Connection. Can youth-based listener Holly be the ticket Elis needs to do a three-point turn and drive straight up Success Alley? Elsewhere there’s an abundance of fun as both Benjamin Partridge and Lou Sanders give their two cents on hot air balloons and the glowing-up of Elis James respectively, John does some winning and losing, and a trip to the sound proof booth causes Elis to do some very strange things… Keep watering the soil of content by sending in your fantastic correspondence to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.

It’s Melvin Brain in the chair today as we go all Radio 4. What is thought? What is the self? High. Brow. This is the Best Comedy show at the British Podcast Awards 2025. Parenting Hell simply isn't doing this. There’s even an academic called Dr Loevenbruck involved. It is a full spectrum of vibes today. From deep psychology to S’ing yourself twice in a heartbeat. Elsewhere, John has a hollow coldness in the bones. In other words, he’s hungry. Meanwhile, Elis has eggs on the brain. And it turns out there’s hope for John in meeting the love of his life taking life two steps at a time. elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk on the email to get in touch - but do know that Producer Michael has read an awful lot of emails about inner monologues this week. The sheer quality of correspondence this week has been top tier.