The FuMP

I started working on this song last November. I was really hoping to get it done at some point before March, but given the subject matter it's somewhat appropriate that I just finished it. The title is something my wife occasionally says...I don't know how she managed to succintly summarize depression in four words with such catchy lyrical cadence when I'm the freakin' songwriter in the house, but she never thought to put it over organ-driven ska-punk, so as a great man once said: "Yoink!" I do in fact have a light therapy lamp. Its brand name is "Suxio," a fact that tends to cheer me up far more than its actual functionality because it sounds like the name of the least useful robot ever (*CRASH* "Dammit Suxio! That was the mayor's Victorian snail platter!") Music and Lyrics by Timothy F. Crist Vocals / Programming / Arrangement / Production / Keytar by Tim "Shoebox" Crist Mastered by Aaron Smith (who also suggested some EQ and leveling tweaks!)

Yes! It's the title track from my 40th album, "Emotional Support Hamster!" You should totally buy it at www.stevegoodie.com when it is officially released on Wednesday 4/15/26! Words: SG and Niamh Bagnell Music, guitar, bass, drums, percussion, mandolin, arrangement, production: SG Tuba: Timothy J Weber

Is anyone else tired of getting a full-on inquisition as a punishment for attempting to order pizza? We prove over and over that we're not robots, but our Captcha victories are quickly forgotten and the tests just keep getting harder. Which made us wonder, what's so bad about being a robot anyway? Well, other than the fact that they're taking our jobs and slowly learning our human skills so they can take over the world and enslave us, so there's that. Rest assured, here at Sisyphus Labs, we make music the old-fashioned way: with drum machines, sequencing and sampled phrases stolen from other artists' recordings. But we agree that the difference between AI and humanity is becoming frightfully small. In fact, we concluded, at this point it basically comes down to bodily functions. Therefore, I can take comfort in the fact that as a human musician, while an artificial being might outplay me, there's no way it can consume two bean burritos during sound check and blow an entire horn section off the stage. All music composition, playing and mixing : Bob Emmet Vocals: some robots Special Guest: Devo Spice, as frustrated human rapper

So the Suffolk and Goode Players recently did a Simon and Garfunkel parody, and then Steve Goodie did a Simon and Garfunkel parody, and we thought, hey! We wanna play! So here's our repurposing of "El Condor Pasa (If I Could)," Paul and Artie's repurposing of a piece by Daniel Alomia Robles. Yes, we're parodying a 56-year-old version of a 113-year-old song. We like to keep things fresh. Like our meat. Robert Lund: Vocals, guitar, bass, mandolin, ocarina sampling, panpipe sampling, Roland S-50, production, what have you Macy Lund: Vocals M. Spaff Sumsion: Lyrics

This Year is a song about finally making some changes.

Hey, a couple years ago we wrote a song about how awful things are in the world and, because we're lazy, we didn't record it until now. We worried that the song would no longer be relevant a couple years later, but... lucky us... things are even WORSE now! We really dodged a bullet there! Anyway, light yourself a dumpster fire and enjoy this tune.

Robots, Robots Everywhere! And for everything! Well, almost everything.............. All vocals and Tuba: Drew Jacobs

Honestly, James K. Polk hasn't had this much attention in decades.

This is another entry in the "I can't believe no one has done this already" category. Also in the "I can't believe I haven't thought of this before" category. And of course, the standard "wow this is stupid" category. Music: Max C. Freedman and James E. Myers Words, guitars, bass, drums, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Helpful help: Niamh Bagnell From my upcoming FORTIETH album, "Emotional Support Hamster." Have a look at www.stevegoodie.com why dontcha?

Just another song about a guy named Bob who inadvertantly sets off alarms in local businesses. No one knows why.

Sometimes it's nice when a famous person wishes you a very personal Happy Birthday! (from Christopher Walken) Music by Jonny May (PianoWithJonny.com) Vocals and concept by Joe J Thomas of Joe's Dump (.com) Copyright 2026, Joe J Thomas and Joe's Dump (.com) All Rights Reserved. Not A Quinn-Martin Production.

This is a long-lost Power Salad recording, Craig's vocal demo discovered in 2025 and augmented by Chris resulting in a typically Salady dystopian mess. Sort of a cousin to "In My Driverless Car" thematically, it further delves into what might be happening 11 years on from that recording, with Tesla and Waymo troubles happening around us in real time. Lyrics and vocal (!) by Craig, "I'm Not In Love" choir vocal sample, editing and production by Chris.

This is about as political as I get, musically. (Also, I realize the irony in that pointing out someone else's biases inherantly states my own.)

A satirical song about the type of guy who joins ICE. I can't write a sincere song. I can't write a song that leads to any serious political change. But I can write a song that makes fun of these absolute dweebs. lyrics

Personally I never had any trouble being present, or taking part in the birth of my four children. In fact, I wouldn't trade the experience for anything, and would encourage any future fathers out there to be as much involved in the actual delivery as the mother and care givers will allow. That being said...there are a few of you, and you probably know who you are, who should never set foot in a delivery room. Recently, my nephews son was one of the later, who upon entering the delivery room was asked to sit on a chair in the back of the room, against the wall, Where, after viewing one of the final contractions promptly lost his breakfast, then... passed out! Thus!! the re-birth... if you will, of a song I originally recorded in the 90's for a friend of mine. And now,.. in 2026 for the rest of you to enjoy. Parody the Wynonna Judd's "No One Else On Earth" Production and vocals: Robert Lund Lyrics: Robert Lund, Terry Moffit Lead guitar: Danny Larsen

There are so many things to do, but you have been chosen. Time is meaningless and your fate is sealed. There is a cat on your lap.

You know how when you were a little kid they told you you could grow up to be "anything you wanted"? Yeah... About that...

Last year at MarsCon I tried something a little different for my concert. Instead of doing my usual set with short bits of stand-up comedy between songs, I tried to make it more like a hip hop concert with minimal talking between songs and my "posse" on stage with me the whole time. My posse consisted of Shoebox of Worm Quartet and Insane Ian. The end result was a lot of fun and I'm hoping to do more shows like this. But since I had Shoebox on stage with me I decided to premiere the latest Stupid Rap Battles. This one features me as a three-legged dog, and Shoebox as a fancy cup of coffee. This was the end result. Chris Mezzolesta was the pre-recorded announcer. This recording is from the 2026 MarsCon Fundraiser Album available now at MarsConComedy.com. Please pick up a copy and help out the comedy-music track. Lyrics, music, vocals: Tom Rockwell, Tim Crist Announcer: Chris Mezzolesta

A while back, I asked folks to suggest song titles, and I would write something based on the title alone. It was a fun expereiment, and maybe I should revisit it again. That said, it did yield this: one of the dumbest songs I've ever written (and honestly, a favorite of mine and Ben, my producer and co-writer of this melodical malady). This track of course comes from the Marscon 2026 Comedy Music Track Funraiser MP3 Album which you can purchase now to help cover the Hotel Room costs for this year's Comedy Music acts, and features almost 4 hours of live comedy music performances and other miscelaneous banter that more often than not features me, as I also emcee'd the event last year.

I had this silly notion for a song, putting Tom Petty together with Rocky and Bullwinkle... and it just wouldn't go away, and it made me giggle. So here ya go. Music: Tom Petty Lyrics :SG, Stephen "burpo" Debonrepos, Niamh Bagnell Guitars, drums, bass, keyboards, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Rocky and Announcer: The Luke "The Great Luke Ski" Sienkowski Bullwinkle: Dale Jones Helpful help: Susan "Sulu" Dubow