War and Peace in just 7 years (WAPIN7)

Pour yourself a final cup of mud and saddle up your favourite pig, cow or even perhaps horse, because it's time to continue forwards, onwards, in the direction of travel! That way! Go! It's a good day to die (finally!) - the sun is shining, the orders are ready, and the enemy is present. We've got everything we need for a traumatic, poorly executed battle. Charge! /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Fight the curse... with money! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Rate us, the curse would hate that! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - See us, free us! (from the curse) tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, the safest way to communicate in times of curse. WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, a look back at happier curse free times.

It's raining; it's pouring. The old, potentially dead man, is snoring. Nick went to war and found a pub, When exactly will we be warring?! /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Fight the curse... with money! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Rate us, the curse would hate that! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - See us, free us! (from the curse) tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, the safest way to communicate in times of curse. WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, a look back at happier curse free times.

Bags. We thought we knew everything there was to know about them. We thought we'd been inside them all. But what if I told you there was one more bag, one special bag no one had ever seen before - let alone opened. What if this bag held the power to change everything? Designed by Russia's only human pea this bag could change the war, Andy Pandy, maybe even Napolean himself. Would you dare to open it? Would you dare to leave the comfort of your own bag and climb inside this other bag? Join us this week as we do exactly that - we're climbing inside Bag 10 and no one can stop us. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Fight the curse... with money! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Rate us, the curse would hate that! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - See us, free us! (from the curse) tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, the safest way to communicate in times of curse. WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, a look back at happier curse free times.

Ok, so there's one giant bag and inside that bag there are 9 sub-bags. Each of these 9 sub-bags, apart from bag 9, has other smaller bags inside them - think of them as sub-sub-bags. Oh, and these bags are filled with people and each bag, including sub-bags and maybe sub-sub-bags, are in competition with each other. What are the bags and their many many sub-bags fighting for? Have a listen and find out. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Fight the curse... with money! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Rate us, the curse would hate that! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - See us, free us! (from the curse) tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, the safest way to communicate in times of curse. WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, a look back at happier curse free times.

Napoleon, we've seen him wild with anger, we've seen him quiver with rage, we've seen him snuff with impunity. Now it's time to see Napoleon calm as a clam - a clam that also happens to control one of the world's most significant military forces. Fresh from a light ride, and with his full-bodied narcissistic fury bottled safely and healthily inside, clam Napoleon is ready to chat like a big clam. Casual, cool, calm, clam - prepare yourself for the most relaxing seafood encounter you're likely to have this week, with France's most reasonable and normal shellfish emperor. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Fight the curse... with money! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Rate us, the curse would hate that! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - See us, free us! (from the curse) tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, the safest way to communicate in times of curse. WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, a look back at happier curse free times.

We start with three noble Barry’s: Barry the Bugler, Barry the Bodyguard and Barry the Burger (horse). Will the Barry’s successfully escort their leader, who might also be called Barry, along the yellow brick road to find out who’s behind the curtain? Will they succeed? Will they successfully stop the war? Or will they each get a faceful of snuff? Whatever happens, we can all agree, it’s absolutely NOT like rain on your wedding day. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Emerge from the shadows and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Don't rate bad, rate good! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - Follow us on the baddest app around! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, not a bad way to send us text or pictures! WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, nothing bad here!

Don't be coconut shy, come on down to the WAPIN7 Fête! We've got dodgems, teacup rides and a coconut shy! Plus an area to sell secondhand goods. It must be fate. Fancy some candy floss?! Well, the machine is broken so you can't have any. Oh, and we're off to war... Again. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Emerge from the shadows and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Don't rate bad, rate good! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - Follow us on the baddest app around! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, not a bad way to send us text or pictures! WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, nothing bad here!

We're back for Book 9 and boy is this going to be bad! Not the podcast, cross our saucy little fingers, but the world of War and Peace. It's been way too long since we heard from that Napoleon chap and we really got the feeling that he wasn't quite finished last time. Plus we've had quite a bit of peace recently, which makes the title of the book quite ominous indeed. Whatever happens we're in this together, so pour yourself a hot steaming cup of beef tea and join us for Book 9! /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Emerge from the shadows and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Don't rate bad, rate good! instagram.com/wapin7podcast - Follow us on the baddest app around! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Humble email, not a bad way to send us text or pictures! WAPIN7.com - Visit Tolstoy's Hall of Fame, nothing bad here!

What do you get when you mix the 'wrong type' of bees, a sentient half-dressed bear with a penchant for honey and a child with a gun and a really really nice balloon? Why, you get the Season 8 special book episode of WAPIN7, is what you get! And probably an extremely serious concussion which would require immediate medical attention. Onwards! To Ashford Forest in East Sussex - to be precise. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

It's time for the Season 8 Catch-Up Quiz and boy do we have some questions for you! There are pictures of comets, AI-generated nightmare art, varying degrees of slug speed accuracy and of course a question about the Smurfs. How does this all link to book 8 of War and Peace? There's only one way to find out... Onwards! *Cue Gameshow Music /// Full list of incredible slug facts: https://a-z-animals.com/blog/10-incredible-slug-facts/ /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

The time has finally come - the end of another book is upon us. Gather round slugs, worms, maggots and humans young, old and slimy as we seamlessly complete character arcs, wrap up storylines, culminate journeys literal and figurative, and generally tie up loose ends in this decisive season finale. The slug square is positively quivering with anticipation, and so should you be too. Here's to one more book, and many more to come! /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

What happens when you add one more side to a love triangle? What happens when one of those sides is an actual slug? A slug who was hell-bent on abducting one of the sides of the square! We promise you this all makes perfect sense. Maybe pour yourself a long drink a take a good slug... /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

Incredibly attractive as they may be, slugs are typically not known for their speed or for their clever plans. Today that all changes. Prepare to meet the slug who has it all... great looks, sure (like all slugs), but also an incredible mensa level planning intellect, and exclusive access to the fastest transport system this side of Prussia. He's got everything he needs, except for one thing - a slug bride, but today that all could be about to change. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

I kissed a slug, and I liked it Taste of its slime... surprising I kissed a slug, just to try it I hope my fiance don't mind it It felt so wrong, it felt so right Don't mean I'm a gastropod tonight I smooched a slug and I liked it (I liked it) /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

Slugs: the familiar garden beastie known for their gelatinous trails, unsightly appearance and voracious love of salad. 19th century Russian slugs were a little different - around 6ft tall they were known to roam in pairs, using their incredible influence and good looks to lure unsuspecting victims into questionable slime related situations. Today we’re going inside the slimy mind of Moscow’s biggest, most prolific slug and his equally sluggy sidekick. They'll be slugging their way around town covering everything in their path in deplorable, upsetting, slime, and we’ll be asking some crucial questions: What do slugs think? What do they want? If they get their slimy hands on you, is there any escape? /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Slip into action and support the podslime! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Slime a quick rating or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Slimestergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of some slime near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Slug of Fame!

Why does the Devil have a saucepan son and why are they dancing? What's wrong with the King's arms? Why is he also dancing? Why is their world made entirely of cardboard? I wish we could answer those questions but unfortunately we just have more: why is the audience slowly getting naked, why is everyone screaming, will Natasha - or for that fact anyone - ever be happy again? We're off to the Opera! It's all over when the Devil breakdances. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Dance into action and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Leave a raving or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Clubstergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of a club near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Club of Fame!

If we want to understand why pure, inescapable sadness has descended on what was once a happy, albeit somewhat violent and troubling book, we must go back in time. Way, way, way back, all the way to Book 7 and ask ourselves some hard questions - what went wrong? Is anyone to blame? Could over indulgence of sauce or other condiments possibly be the culprit? Everything on the table this week, even the sauces, as we go deep into the bottle of sadness to find out just how we got here and how the heck we might get out. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Dance into action and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Leave a raving or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Clubstergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of a club near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Club of Fame!

Sure, being sad is sad. We can't deny it. It feels bad, it feels really quite sad in fact. But what if the only way to conquer sadness is to be even more sad? What if you could have so much sadness that sadness itself would become sad and spit you out? It's a bold idea, sadness would never expect that. Join us this week as we try once again to vanquish sadness in the only way left, by flipping the whole damn sad town on its head and sadding things up until the sadness falls right out. It's big, it's bold, it's sad, it's WAPIN7 Book 8. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Dance into action and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Leave a raving or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Clubstergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of a club near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Club of Fame!

You thought you knew sad? You know, sad... that feeling you get when you realise you've eaten the last crisp and there won't be any more crisps tonight, or when you have a shower and the hot water runs out, or even when you're on a call and the WiFi drops off and you don't know why. Sad, very sad indeed. But it turns out things can be even sadder than that, things can get really, really sad actually in quite a sad way. So buckle up your sad belt, pack a happy snack in your pocket and join us on the sad bus. If we're going to sad town, at least we're going together. /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Dance into action and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Leave a raving or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Clubstergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of a club near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Club of Fame!

We're back with a sadness bomb and some problems as old as time... Can frivolous spending, clubbing and drinking to excess improve your health, mental wellbeing and outlook on life? What would you do if you had loads of money and lost your joie de vivre? Would you ride an elephant around your town to make your neighbours jealous? Would you cover yourself in dayglo paint, hit the club and read the phonebook on the elephant home? Important questions indeed. There's only one way to find the answer... Onwards! To SEASON 8 /// patreon.com/wapin7 - Dance into action and support the podcast! wapin7.com/rate 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟- Leave a raving or review! instagram.com/wapin7podcast/ - Follow us on Clubstergram! tolstoy@wapin7.com - Email us or send us a picture of a club near you! WAPIN7.com - Join the newsletter & visit Tolstoy's Club of Fame!