Who We Are with Rachel Lim

Embark on a thought-provoking journey as we delve into the life and philosophy of Ashish Kumar, a former top PSLE scorer turned 31-year-old retiree. In this captivating episode, we navigate through a series of insightful topics, each unveiling a different facet of Ashish's unconventional perspectives. From his formative years and the influence of studying overseas to his experiences as a civil servant in Singapore, we explore the factors that shaped Ashish's unique perspective on life and work. Along the way, we confront pressing questions about employment, early retirement, and the pursuit of personal freedom in a society bound by expectations. Join me as we dissect the essence of Ashish Kumar, examining the values and principles that define his existence beyond the confines of traditional success. With each chapter, we peel back the layers of conventional wisdom, challenging misconceptions and igniting introspection. As we navigate through Ashish's story, we are reminded of the importance of living authentically and aligning our actions with our deepest values. Prepare to be inspired, provoked, and enlightened as we embark on this journey of exploration with Ashish Kumar. Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Ashish Kumar here: https://youtube.com/@ashishxiangyikumar?si=uW9XwGaMnwr0q_lN 00:00 Introduction 00:22 Getting to know Ashish Kumar 03:04 The impact of his upbringing 05:39 The influence of studying overseas 09:28 Ashish's Experience as a Singaporean Bureaucrat 14:26 Addressing the challenges & limitations of employment 16:00 Early retirement: A privilege, a choice, or both? 19:11 Navigating the divide between work and personal Life 22:13 What defines Ashish Kumar: Unpacking identity and values 24:50 Pursuing freedom & challenging societal expectations 30:47 Systemic changes towards a flexible work culture 33:31 The dilemma of commitment in pursuit of freedom 34:49 Misconceptions of early retirement 37:03 Reflections on a meaningful life 40:33 The Deathbed Exercise 41:33 Surprising insights after early retirement 45:58 Final thoughts

Join me for an insightful conversation with James Sexton, America's Divorce Lawyer whose expertise extends far beyond the courtroom. With over two decades of experience on the front lines of divorce, James offers a unique perspective on relationships, love, and resilience. Throughout our discussion, James shares invaluable insights gleaned from witnessing the intricacies of countless relationships unraveling. From uncovering the underlying reasons behind relationship breakdowns to exploring real-life examples of "reverse engineering" relationships, we delve into the complexities of maintaining lasting connections. In addition to sharing memorable cases from his career, James offers practical advice for rebuilding after divorce and discusses the essential ingredients for long-term relationship success. Tune in for a conversation you won't want to miss as we navigate the highs and lows of love and relationships with James Sexton. Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow James Sexton here: https://www.instagram.com/nycdivorcelawyer/ 00:00 Introduction 01:11 Get to know James Sexton 04:28 Unveiling the root cause of marital breakdowns 10:25 Red Flags in Relationships: Recognising Warning Signs 15:48 Focusing on what truly matters 17:28 The art of effective communication 22:19 Reverse-engineering relationships to solve disconnection 25:58 The pitfalls of keeping scores in relationships 28:57 Navigating societal expectations in your relationships 34:28 Normalising couples therapy, counseling, and vulnerability 38:58 How do you rebuild confidence after a divorce? 45:22 Advice James Sexton would give to his younger self 47:44 Final thoughts

What's your apology language? And, more importantly, what's your partner's? Join Leo, my husband, and I as we dive into the 5 Apology Languages, an insightful concept introduced by Gary Chapman and Dr. Jennifer Thomas, the brilliant minds behind The Love Language. Just as understanding our partner's love language is crucial for fostering connection, grasping their apology language is equally vital for nurturing resilient relationships. In this candid episode, we share personal anecdotes, practical tips, and discover how understanding and speaking each other's apology language can transform our conflicts into opportunities for growth and deeper connection. Take the Apology Language quiz! https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/apology-language Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ 00:00 Introduction 00:20 Get to know Leo! 01:09 The 5 Apology Languages 02:26 What are our Apology Languages? 03:54 #1 Expressing Regret 04:13 #2 Accepting Responsibility 04:33 #3 Making Restitution 05:02 #4 Planned Changes 05:17 #5 Requesting for Forgiveness 06:04 Talking through our Apology Languages 08:06 How can the Apology Language help relationships? 08:54 Our real life example and how we put it in practice 12:35 Final thoughts

Embark on a captivating journey with Pat Law, founder of GOODSTUPH, as she shares her remarkable 14-year odyssey through the tumultuous landscape of entrepreneurship. From humble beginnings selling spiders in her childhood to building a multi-million-dollar advertising agency, Pat's story is a testament to resilience, determination, and the relentless pursuit of excellence. In this episode, Pat opens up about the pivotal moments that shaped her journey, from learning the value of hard work and integrity in her upbringing to confronting the challenges of loneliness and self-doubt as a founder. With candid honesty, she reflects on the lessons learned along the way, both personally and professionally, and how they have shaped her identity as a leader. Through insightful anecdotes and hard-won wisdom, Pat delves into the core principles that have driven her success, from the importance of honesty and humility to the transformative power of leading by example. She offers invaluable advice to aspiring entrepreneurs and creatives, urging them to embrace the hunger for success and create environments where others can thrive. Let's dive in. Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Pat Law here: https://www.instagram.com/patlaw/ Check out GOODSTUPH here: https://www.instagram.com/goodstuph/ 00:00 Introduction 01:32 Get to know Pat Law 04:05 How Pat Law’s childhood impacted her 14:13 “We are products of our upbringing” 18:16 Key principles that drove Pat Law’s success 19:36 Entrepreneurship can get lonely 22:47 The story behind GOODSTUPH 25:33 Pat Law’s hardest lessons in entrepreneurship 39:36 Qualities that are instrumental to Pat Law’s success 43:30 Delivering feedback and learning from mistakes 47:36 A good leader vs A great leader 49:24 How the definition of success can evolve 53:40 What drives Pat Law to keep going? 55:17 Advice to leaders in the new era 57:27 Advice for leaders in the creative industry 59:10 Final thoughts

In today's fast-paced world, where success is measured by more than just technical skills, emotional intelligence emerges as a defining factor. Join me as we dive deep into the fascinating world of emotional intelligence and explore why it's the key to personal and professional success. As Harvard Business Review asserts, "The most effective leaders are all alike in one crucial way: They all have a high degree of what has come to be known as emotional intelligence." But what exactly is emotional intelligence, and why is it crucial in today's dynamic landscape? In this episode, we'll debunk common misconceptions about emotional intelligence and uncover practical strategies for enhancing it in our daily lives. From understanding and acknowledging our feelings to cultivating emotional resilience, we'll discuss how embracing our emotions can lead to better decision-making, improved relationships, and overall well-being. This episode is packed with valuable insights to help you thrive in today's fast-paced world. Let's dive in! Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Get connected with Joyce: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joyce-chen-coach/ Additional resources on Emotional Intelligence: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDEY8jgkdxk https://u.pcloud.link/publink/show?code=sYH 00:00 Introduction 02:24 Get to know Joyce Chen 04:34 Topic: Emotional Intelligence 05:28 What is emotional intelligence? 07:06 Understanding core emotions 08:13 Common misconceptions of emotions 11:45 How to tune into our EQ and BQ 13:10 Above the line VS Below the line framework 17:26 The role of emotional intelligence in our lives 20:45 Application of emotional intelligence 24:09 The after-effects of repressing emotions 28:01 How to effectively release emotions 31:20 Ways to practice emotional intelligence 34:09 Final thoughts

Join me in this enriching conversation with the renowned personal growth expert and author of international best-sellers 'The 5AM Club' and 'The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari', Robin Sharma, as we delve into the transformative insights shared in his latest book, "The Wealth Money Can't Buy." In this episode, we explore the concept of the 8 Forms of Wealth, redefining success beyond monetary measures. Robin shares invaluable advice for those seeking meaningful changes in their lives, navigating the fine line between pushing for growth and avoiding burnout. We explore the inspiration behind "The Wealth Money Can't Buy" and how it differs from Robin's previous works, uncovering a shift in redefining success. We also delve into common challenges faced by individuals striving for growth and leadership, and discover the key qualities that distinguish exceptional human beings. Throughout the conversation, Robin elaborates on the 8 Forms of Wealth, highlighting the intersections of growth, wellness, and relationships in creating a fulfilling life. From practical strategies for personal development to uncovering hidden habits of the truly rich, join me as we discover the obstacles to true wealth and uncover the secrets to living a purposeful and fulfilling life, leaving behind a meaningful legacy. Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Get 'The Wealth Money Can't Buy: The 8 Hidden Habits to Live Your Richest Life' here: https://singapore.kinokuniya.com/bw/9781846048296 Follow Robin Sharma here: https://www.instagram.com/robinsharma/ 00:00 Introduction 01:30 Who inspired Robin Sharma to embark on his journey? 02:32 Common challenges in achieving growth 04:22 The key to sustaining success 06:47 Common traits of successful people 09:25 Balancing between elite performance and deep recovery 10:44 Diving into: The Wealth Money Can’t Buy 13:24 Cultivating daily personal growth 15:02 On discovering purpose 18:31 What are “PENAM Principles”? 23:11 The importance of choosing the right partner 25:40 The 10,000 Dinners Question 27:22 The hidden habits of authentically wealthy people 30:42 How does “Going Ghost” benefit us? 32:05 How can the “8 Forms of Wealth” transform lives? 34:44 What are the biggest obstacles to achieving true wealth? 38:10 Living a fulfilling life 40:17 Final thoughts

Who we are is an ever-evolving journey without limits. Join me as I delve into every facet of our lives — from work and family to relationships, self-discovery, and beyond. Experience a series of conversations and shared reflections that span from in-depth discussions with thought leaders around the world, to personal lessons shared with friends. Each episode offers valuable insights into our identities and pathways to self-improvement. Welcome to Who We Are — a podcast devoted to the continuous journey of uncovering our ever-evolving selves. Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ 00:00 Welcome to a new season of the podcast 00:32 What I’ve been up to 01:05 Letting go of fear 02:11 Moving beyond Rach Reflects 02:55 The intention behind Who We Are 03:49 What to expect from this season 05:03 Introducing this season’s in-house guest expert 06:20 Final thoughts

It's the FINAL episode of Season One :') I can't believe we are here! Join me and some guest listeners for this reflective, fun and celebratory episode as we look back and reflect on what we've learnt from the weekly episodes the past 6months. We shared our favorite guests, most meaningful takeaways, the personal growth and challenges we experienced. This episode is a tribute to all the elements that have made Season One unforgettable. PS Don't miss the exciting quiz and game, and find out who is the biggest RachReflects fan ;) As we bid farewell to Season One, I also offer a sneak peek into what's in store for Season Two, with even more inspiring content, thought-provoking conversations, and exciting surprises. Thank you for being part of the journey! Please share in the comments below and let me know what you'd love to see in the upcoming season! Your feedback will shape the future of RachReflects. Chapters: Find RachReflects on : ⁠http://rachreflects.com ⁠http://⁠instagram.com/ms_rach

Dive into this enriching video where we unravel the intricacies of navigating work environments and relationships in the professional realm. From assessing your ideal work setting to managing expectations and conquering fears in meetings, we've got it all. Join us on this enlightening journey through the complexities of professional growth and self-discovery with our #WorkBestie Crystal in our final work bestie episode for this season! Chapters: Crystal is the CEO and Co-founder of Forest Wolf, a global leader in future-ready skills, leadership, and corporate learning and development. In this episode, she answers 7 of the most asked questions on work, and provides us with advice and insights on how we should tackle them. Let’s dive right in! Find RachReflects on :⁠⁠http://rachreflects.com⁠ ⁠⁠http://⁠instagram.com/ms_rach⁠

In a world filled with expectations and preconceived notions about success and fulfillment, this book stands out as a guiding light for those seeking to break free from the mold and design a life that's uniquely ours. Join me in this episode as we dive into the inspiring pages of 'Designing Your Life' by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans. Through the lens of design thinking, we explore powerful concepts like reframing challenges as opportunities, creating a personal life compass, and crafting an Odyssey Plan to map out our ideal future. But this episode isn't just about the book; it's a personal journey. I'll share my real-life stories, lessons learned, and the profound impact 'Designing Your Life' has had on my path. So, if you're ready to unlock your potential, embrace creativity, and chart a course toward a more fulfilling future, tune in to this episode. It's time to pick up your life's blueprint and start creating a masterpiece. Chapters: More RachReflects: http://rachreflects.com http://instagram.com/ms_rach Indicate your interest for the course here : https://forms.gle/sPcHCFUsLTzvBsKU6

Are you truly thriving in your personal and professional life, or are you merely surviving? In this thought-provoking episode, my personal coach, Joyce Chen and I delve deep into the transformative concepts of the "Zone of Genius" and the "Zone of Excellence." Join us as we explore how understanding and harnessing these zones can lead to a life of purpose, passion, and unparalleled fulfillment. Discover what sets your heart on fire and where your innate talents truly shine as we dissect the Zone of Genius – the realm where passion and proficiency meet, creating a powerful synergy that can propel you to greatness. We'll share inspiring stories of individuals who've unlocked their Zone of Genius and reaped the extraordinary rewards. But that's not all! We'll also journey into the Zone of Excellence, the comfort zone where many find themselves, excelling in tasks but often feeling a nagging sense of unfulfillment. Learn how to differentiate between these two zones and how to gracefully transition from one to the other. This episode isn't just about theory; it's about action. We'll provide practical tips and exercises to help you identify your Zone of Genius and take those crucial steps toward living a life that's both professionally successful and personally fulfilling. Join us for a transformative discussion that might just change the trajectory of your life. It's time to uncover your Zone of Genius and start living your most exceptional life. Don't miss this episode – your future self will thank you. Chapters: Find Joyce here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joyce-chen-coach/ http://instagram.com/joycechen_coaching www.conscious.is More RachReflects: http://rachreflects.com⁠ http://instagram.com/ms_rach

"All of my best decisions in business and in life have been made with heart, intuition, guts... not analysis.” - Jeff Bezos In this episode, we embark on a captivating exploration of human awareness and decision-making through the lenses of Head, Heart, and Gut intelligence. The idea behind these three sources of awareness is that they complement each other and collectively contribute to how we make decisions. Join me with our #workbestie Crystal as we delve into the intricate interplay of these three sources of awareness that guide our choices in life, and how we can hone and strengthen each of them. Chapters: Find RachReflects on : http://rachreflects.com⁠ http://instagram.com/ms_rach

“A change in one is a change in millions.” My special guest on this episode is a living, breathing example of his favourite quote (above): Someone who has inspired change in millions when he decided to change himself one summer in 2011. Diego Perez, perhaps better known by you and millions of others around the world as Yung Pueblo through his Instagram account and bestselling books — Inward, Clarity & Connection, and Lighter — uses his beautiful art of words and poetry to help himself and others recognise the power of self- healing, create healthy relationships, and tune in to the wisdom that comes when we truly work on knowing ourselves. His self-healing journey began when, at 23, he thought he had reached the end of his life. A life of constant hard-partying as his way of escaping the sadness and anxiety he was experiencing, and never wanting to be alone with himself to feel difficult emotions, eventually pushed his body to the edge and gave him a mild heart attack. That was his wake-up call to come out of ill-fated patterns which kept leading him back to sorrow and misery. And the only way to come out of it, he realised, was to start telling himself the truth— that something was wrong, and he didn’t feel good. So he stopped fighting himself, and started meditating in 2012. That was how it all began. The practice of meditation has, no doubt, changed the course of Diego’s life. In our chat, he talks about his personal journey with his practice: The immediate lightness and spaciousness he had felt even after the first time; how it has made a writer of him (“Honestly, meditation is the secret to my creativity.”); the ways it has improved his relationships with others and with himself; and how this scared time he spends with — and within — himself has helped him cultivate self-compassion, awareness, gratitude, and empowered him to choose the narratives of his life. I’m truly grateful for Diego for sharing his wisdom, and with such peace and calm in his energy as always, on what he has learned on his personal growth about reframing our relationship with change (“We’re afraid of losing things because of change, but we don’t realise that we have gained things because of change.”), focusing on our own internal growth in the face of the many demands and expectations of a fast-changing, noisy external world, how to be more compassionate towards ourselves, unlearn old beliefs by letting go of “trash from the past”, the ideal state to approach life, and why one of the best skills we human beings can learn is the ability to enhance our self love. I could go on and on, but it’s best I stop here and let you listen and soak in the beautiful, soulful, inspiring words of Yung Pueblo himself. Keep an eye out for his upcoming book, The Way Forward, which will be released on October 10. I know I am. Chapters: Find RachReflects on : http://rachreflects.com ⁠http://instagram.com/ms_rach

This week, I have a very special guest, my husband Leo! As we celebrated our recent wedding anniversary, we thought it would be apt to share some of our reflections & lessons over the last 7 years as a couple. In this episode, we share our personal anecdotes, stories and lessons that have helped us build a stronger marriage. Chapters: Find RachReflects on: ⁠http://rachreflects.com⁠ ⁠⁠http://instagram.com/ms_rach

Every person deserves to design a well-lived and joyful life with purpose and fulfilment. In this thought-provoking episode, I sit down with the renowned Bill Burnett - previously a Product Leader at Apple and designer of Star Wars toys to Executive Director of the Design Program at Stanford and bestselling author of Designing Your Life and Designing Your Work life. What does it mean to live a successful life? What are the most dangerous advices out there? What are the essential skills and characteristics necessary to thrive in today's ever-changing landscape? This is one episode filled with practical wisdom and actionable advice to help you design the life you truly desire! Chapters Find RachReflects on : http://rachreflects.com⁠ http://instagram.com/ms_rach

Join me this week for a special episode of RachReflects, where I held an in-person Ask Me Anything (AMA) session during our get-together. Some of these questions include: Find RachReflects on: http://rachreflects.com ⁠http://instagram.com/ms_rach

We are back with another episode with our in-house guest expert, our #WorkBestie Crystal! This time, we will be learning how express ourselves effectively and confidently as a manager around some of the topics listed below: Crystal is the CEO and Co-founder of Forest Wolf, a global leader in future-ready skills, leadership, and corporate learning and development. In this episode, she answers some of the challenges and issues we face at work, and provides us with advice and frameworks on how we should overcome them. Let’s dive right in! Find RachReflects on : ⁠http://rachreflects.com⁠ http://⁠instagram.com/ms_rach

This week, I’m back with Part 2 of an illuminating conversation with Nir Eyal on how we can all free ourselves from distraction. In other words, how can we become indistractable so we may create the life we truly desire and become a version of ourselves that’s living at full potential every day? In Part 1, Nir unearthed for us the root of our distraction and generously shared the essential tools to help us reclaim and master our attention. (If you haven’t yet listened to it, I highly recommend that you do.) If you, like me, are a parent — or plan to be one — then you definitely won’t want to miss this episode, where we delve into what it means to raise indistractable children in a distracting world. The four fundamental steps apply: 1. Scheduling time to be “tractable”, whether that’s time for homework, free play, or screen time. 2. Teaching kids from a young age to master internal triggers or uncomfortable sensations that lead to distraction. 3. Removing external triggers. Some of the negative consequences of social media doesn’t come from the social media per se, but what it displaces — primarily, sleep, which is known to contribute to mental health issues. 4. Make an effort pact: Engage your children to use technology to block out distracting technology. The Forest app, for example, is one way of teaching kids how to be accountable for their own time. “If we’re going to raise indistractable kids, we have to be indistractable parents,” says Nir, an advocate for leading by example. He also introduced me to what he calls “the three psychological nutrients”: Autonomy, Competency and Relatedness that all humans need. How can we then ensure that our children are sufficiently nourished in these areas offline so they won’t see the need to seek them out online? Nir is the author of two bestselling books, Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products and the critically acclaimed Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life. He is also an investor who backs habit-forming products he believes improve lives, such as Eventbrite and Canva. He has taught at the Stanford Graduate School of Business and the Hasso Plattner Institute of Design at Stanford, and his writings have been features in The New York Times, The Harvard Business Review, Time Magazine, and Psychology Today. Chapters Find RachReflects on : http://rachreflects.com⁠ http://instagram.com/ms_rach

You’ve probably heard this one before: When you change your habits, you change your life. But before we can change our habits, we need to learn how to master our attention and focus, and do the things you say you’re going to do that’ll direct us towards living the life we desire, and being the person we want to become. This week, I am beyond thrilled to be sharing with you my chat with Nir Eyal, who’s going to make you think — and re-think — how you’re spending your time and attention every day. Are you actively choosing your life with each action you take? Why do we do things that we did not intend against our better interest? Why do we go off track? Through his work, Nir wants to make sure we don’t look back on our lives with regret for all the things we said we were going to do, but didn’t because we got “distracted”. Nir is the author of two bestselling books, Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products and the critically acclaimed Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life. He has taught at the Stanford Graduate School of Business and the Hasso Plattner Institute of Design at Stanford, and his writings have been featured in The New York Times, The Harvard Business Review, Time Magazine, and Psychology Today. We had so much to talk about that this conversation will be shared with you in two parts. In this first half, Nir redefines for us what “distraction” means: It is not what’s on the outside that is distracting us — not social media, not the children, not the laundry. What is distracting us 90% of the time is our desire to escape uncomfortable emotional states such as boredom and loneliness — also known as “internal triggers”. How do we manage them instead of letting them manage us? Do you know what you really want to do with your time? How can we turn our values into time and action with intention by the simple act of scheduling them in our calendar, whether that’s an hour for exercise and mediation, weekly date night with your spouse, or house chores? Let’s dive in. (Stay tuned for Part Two of the conversation where we get into what it means to raise indistractable kids in today’s world.) Chapters Find RachReflects on : ⁠http://rachreflects.com http://instagram.com/ms_rach

I recently had the opportunity to delve into the transformative insights of Michael Bungay Stanier's book, "The Coaching Habit." As I applied the principles from the book to my interactions with various groups of people in my life, including my husband, my team, and my friends, I witnessed a profound shift in my communication dynamics. Through the implementation of the book's essential questions, my ability to foster better communication improved significantly. These powerful questions became the catalysts for more meaningful conversations, as they encouraged active listening and a genuine interest in understanding others. I found that by embracing a coaching approach, I could elicit deeper insights, uncover hidden perspectives, and forge connections built on empathy and trust. The impact of "The Coaching Habit" extended beyond communication alone. It proved instrumental in enhancing my problem-solving and decision-making skills. The book's emphasis on asking the right questions helped me explore problems from various angles, identify root causes, and consider alternative solutions. It also created an environment conducive to reflection, self-discovery, and continuous improvement. This newfound clarity enabled me to make more informed decisions and tackle challenges with greater confidence. In this episode, I am excited to share my reflections on Michael's 7 essential questions. I will also share personal anecdotes and insights gained from practicing this new habit, illuminating the potential it holds for you to enhance your own communication, problem-solving, and relationship-building skills to foster a more connected and empowered way of living. Find RachReflects on : ⁠⁠http://rachreflects.com⁠ ⁠⁠http://instagram.com/ms_rach