No Substitutions, Please

Good as hell! Noah and Louisa talk about the smooth and savory sandwich spread that gives lunches and party trays the extra piquancy of facing God. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

What's better than a bowl of warm, creamy, sweet, spiced rice? Well, a lot of things—especially if you do it wrong. Noah and Louisa find out how surprisingly easy it is to screw up one of the least onerous dishes they've ever brought up on the show. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Tired of boiled, olive drab, soft and mushy green beans? Why not perk them up the same way Noah and Louisa like to gild every vegetal lily: artfully burn them in hot oil? Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

From a goat stew in Jalisco to a fried taco in Tijuana, to the food trucks of San Diego and beyond, this complex dish has gained decadence at every stop along the way. Noah and Louisa get into all the different steps and their appurtenant pitfalls and wonders. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Probably not what you expected for an Easter episode! Tofu: good platform for flavors, decent test of your frying skills, and easy target for jokes if you don't feel like making an effort. Noah and Louisa get into the methods, the pairings, and most of all, as always, the human-induced horrors of this versatile food. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Like many other things we've covered, you might wonder how it's possible to screw up putting melted cheese inside a tortilla. Well, as Noah and Louisa have discovered, the simpler a dish gets, the weirder the cooks of the Internet become in response. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Or are they porch chops? The humble, versatile, and wonderful lean cut of pork loin finally gets its due on No Substitutions, Please. Louisa and Noah tell you how to cook it properly, wax poetic about its wide range of accompaniments, and demonstrate that people will refuse to get anything right, no matter how simple. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Who knew a dish this luxurious could be based on simple rice? Well, not just simple rice. You have to get the right kind, and do things in the exactly right order, and pay a lot of attention to what you're doing—unless you use this one neat trick Noah recently acquired. He and Louisa will be happy to inform you of it. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on BlueSky. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz. Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Sulfurous and delightful, cruciferous and enjoyable. Noah and Louisa talk about one of the simplest green sides to any dish, and why people keep overcomplicating it. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

If there's something more decadent than a bowl of liquid chocolate, fortified with dairy and perhaps even flavored with assorted sweets, we should probably keep that knowledge far away from the hands of the people Noah and Louisa talk about in this episode. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

While everyone else is talking about the Super Bowl, we're looking forward to Valentine's Day—and what better way to celebrate the love of your life than making a plate of fresh, sweet, delicately-caramelized scallops? Louisa and Noah discuss all the ways to nail this wonderful dish. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

There's a very important question at the heart of this episode: why have bread with your meal when you can have garlic bread with your meal? Noah and Louisa discuss all the different ways to make this restaurant standard. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

You'd think this humblest of breakfast foods would be simply impossible to screw up. Well, you would think that, if you'd just started listening to us. Noah and Louisa discuss the foibles and follies of people who manage to ruin simplicity itself. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Nothing screams "comfort food" more than potatoes and dairy in the same dish, and, well, that's exactly what this is. Noah and Louisa thinly slice a few fools who somehow manage to make it a difficult experience. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

From the down-home kitchens of Latin America to, apparently, the kind of place that thinks every soup is a lobster bisque (more on that in a bit), this humble bean broth has hidden depths Noah and Louisa are all too happy to plumb. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

What's the problem with simple, deliciously shredded, golden-brown, crispy potatoes? Well, each of those adjectives gives people a way to get extremely mad at a breakfast dish. Noah and Louisa talk about why they might even have a point. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Ring in the new year with crisp, delicately-flavored seafood in a rich sauce. Noah and Louisa talk about the importance of keeping your shell on, how to ensure a good brine is had by all, and how Venezuelans like to break their mattresses. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

What better way to celebrate Christmas Eve than making a flavorful little quick bread to share with your loved ones? Louisa and Noah take their yearly chance to grinch out on the assorted commenters of the Internet. You'll want to catch this one. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

Ah, Christmas—that special time of year when we decide to nestle our booze in cinnamon and cream, and in Puerto RIco, coconut into the bargain. Noah and Louisa talk about these two simple holiday libations, which you'd think would be nigh-impossible to screw up, and yet . . . Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.

We're back! After a short hiatus, Noah and Louisa talk about the little green spheres that provide splashes of color and sweetness to so many dishes—assuming you don't cook them to within an inch of their lives. So kick back, download the episode, and find your inner . . . tranquility. Follow us: @NoSubsPlease on Twitter. @NoSubsPlease@mastodon.online on Mastodon. @NoSubsPlease on Cohost. Noah: @elderrumbao on Twitter, @nsmckinnon@laserdisc.party on Mastodon, @nsmckinnon.bsky.social on BlueSky. Louisa: @louisa@mastodon.xyz Our theme is Street Food, by FASSounds, and is governed by the Simplified Pixabay License. Our cover art includes work by artist Kirsty Pargeter.