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A Thousand Tiny Steps

Health & Wellness Podcasts

This podcast is for people who want to experience personal growth. Finding joy in tragic moments is a difficult task, but by listening to the stories of an ordinary woman who goes through extraordinary experiences, you can learn how to get through anything. Hear stories from Barb Higgins, the woman who had a baby at 57, lost her daughter to a brain tumor, dealt with addiction, and so much more. Inside each episode, Barb shares a story from her life and how she got through each tough experience. From lessons learned to how she took her self-care to another level, Barb pulls you into her world of inspiring circumstances and leaves you wondering, how does she do it?

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Location:

United States

Description:

This podcast is for people who want to experience personal growth. Finding joy in tragic moments is a difficult task, but by listening to the stories of an ordinary woman who goes through extraordinary experiences, you can learn how to get through anything. Hear stories from Barb Higgins, the woman who had a baby at 57, lost her daughter to a brain tumor, dealt with addiction, and so much more. Inside each episode, Barb shares a story from her life and how she got through each tough experience. From lessons learned to how she took her self-care to another level, Barb pulls you into her world of inspiring circumstances and leaves you wondering, how does she do it?

Language:

English

Episodes

Repeating Patterns From My Childhood

3/28/2023
My life felt like it was exploding as I was living 3 major life crises: Roy, Robin, and Kenney. They were all happening at once. My social life imploded and became non-existent, Roy and I “broke up” and got back together, and Kenney moved into an apartment. As I look back on these years I just feel terrible as I ended up repeating patterns from my childhood. Key Takeaways: [2:20] Living these two different lives [4:11] Robin wanted me to only like the people she liked [5:31] Being...

Duration:00:45:22

Having An On Again, Off Again Relationship

3/21/2023
In the time leading up to Molly's death, I had a tumultuous relationship with Roy that was on again, off again. This created chaos in my life as I was finally becoming financially stable, finding hobbies I enjoyed, and trying to give my daughters a good life. As I look back on it all, I realize I was recreating childhood trauma. Key Takeaways: [1:39] Spring and Easter are difficult now that Molly died [3:29] Finishing my book and remodeling my house [4:36] The school district has...

Duration:00:34:50

Spending Hours in Court

3/14/2023
In 2011, I was working a million jobs just trying to pay the mortgage and keep busy. I was spending time with Roy where I could and a lot of our time spent together was spent dealing with court hearings. As that was going on I started CrossFit, our house almost went to auction, and Kenney got sicker and sicker. It was a whirlwind, before it would all come crashing down. Key Takeaways: [5:05] Working at Flips with Robin and Skye [8:33] Keeping my life open for Roy to be in it [11:29]...

Duration:00:32:39

Narcissistic People Stay in my Life

3/7/2023
I attract people with narcissistic tendencies like flies. All my relationships have common themes in them and follow me everywhere: my romantic relationships, my jobs, the school board. These relationships heavily impacted my life as I dealt with death and trying to adjust to losing my job. Key Takeaways: [2:01] My friend Tom passed away [5:34] Feeling pulled on by both sides [7:09] Restraining orders and Chris Rath [9:35] People around me with narcissistic tendencies [11:43] Death...

Duration:00:38:46

Picking my Life up Piece by Piece

2/28/2023
Losing my job was devastating and I had to pick up my life piece by piece. I worked a million jobs, spent tons of time with my daughters, and navigated a tricky relationship. I was left with many feelings when I felt like no one in my life supported me and everyone wanted me to resign. It has made me look back on this time and the regrets I have. Key Takeaways: [3:33] None of my coworkers supported me [4:30] I ended up resigning to keep my insurance and pay [5:53] Being accused of...

Duration:00:34:54

Being Suspended From Teaching

2/21/2023
Between July to November of 2010 I was constantly called into meetings for misbehavior in my job and was suspended. I never went back to teaching. Constantly being harassed, freezing at all the wrong moments, and dealing with a complex relationship outside of school made it a dark time in my life. In this episode, I look back on the manipulation in my life and how it led me to never teach for the district again. Key Takeaways: [5:44] Going from being successful to having a stressful...

Duration:00:31:41

Beginning a Secret Relationship

2/14/2023
As my life financially kept getting worse, I began a relationship with Roy. Itt had amazing times, but was also filled with gaslighting and love bombing. I debated leaving my marriage, thinking about my kids, and how my life could have alternatively happened. As all this was happening, things finally blew up with my husband and it felt like my entire world was crumbling down. Key Takeaways: [3:41] Struggling financially and spending a lot of time working [4:32] Trauma bonding with...

Duration:00:47:49

Trying to Cut Ties

2/7/2023
As I started my sabbatical professionally things were going great. I connected with the children and created a curriculum that I was proud of. My relationship with Amy and her family was dwindling, when Roy came back into the picture and it turned my world upside down. In this episode, I go through a series of conflicting emotions and what was truly the calm before the storm. Key Takeaways: [3:43] What I wanted to achieve on my sabbatical [5:48] Amy’s utter devotion to her...

Duration:00:40:25

The Restraining Order

1/31/2023
The tension was starting to become overwhelming when a restraining order came into play. Amy and I both pulled away from our friendship and I had our children separated in class. The stress permeated every aspect of my life as the situation became worse and worse. In this episode, I look back on how the restraining order was used and the impact it left. Key Takeaways: [3:44] Amy’s strong desire to cling to me [6:25] Roy oversharing with Teresa [10:10] Pulling back from my...

Duration:00:36:05

Escalation and Trying to Step Away

1/24/2023
As the situation with Amy escalated and I tried to step back, my life felt like it was a dumpster on fire. My household finances were a mess and I was constantly being pulled into 50 different directions. As I learned more about the situation, I felt more and more needed by Amy and the situation quickly started tumbling downwards. Key Takeaways: [4:19] Constantly being called by Amy on the phone [9:04] Applying for my sabbatical [10:50] Struggling with financials and the IRS [14:29]...

Duration:00:40:43

Navigating a Complex Friendship

1/17/2023
My first 2 years of my friendship with Amy were a gift, but I didn’t know how it would change the trajectory of my life. We truly did click as friends as our friendship was largely centered around motherhood. But our communication styles and how we lived our lives separated us. In this episode, I explore how a relationship changed my life and drove my other friends away. Key Takeaways: [2:04] Staying in abusive relationships [5:57] My friendship with Amy was centered around our...

Duration:00:34:30

A New Friend and Boundary Crossing

1/10/2023
It started with a note in a backpack and ended with a bucketload of complex emotions. The summer of 2005 to the summer of 2007 was a relatively normal time, but it would end in disaster because of a new friend I made. There were red flags everywhere, but I chose to ignore them because I felt like we really clicked and we were bonded by motherhood. That boundary crossing would come back to haunt me later and would impact the next decade of my life. Key Takeaways: [4:41] Getting sick,...

Duration:00:54:33

The Evolution of My New Year’s Eve

1/3/2023
When I was younger, New Year’s Eve was a time to play outside and eat a lot with friends. As I grew older, it was a holiday synonymous with alcohol. My friends and I would go to parties, stay up all night, and get blackout drunk. When I became a mom that all changed: it became a pretty sober event, spending time with kids, and making a bonfire. After Molly died we stopped celebrating and now that I have Jack we will have to decide what new traditions we want to create. Key...

Duration:00:29:23

The Hypocrisy of Holidays

12/27/2022
The holidays are time markers and they remind me of what I’ve lost. They also remind me of all the expectations society has around holidays and the hypocrisy of it all. After losing Molly it was too difficult to celebrate the holidays. Now that I have Jack we have begun to create new traditions and try to do “normal” holidays again. I am focusing on celebrating the holidays the way I want to and not catering to society's expectations. Key Takeaways: [2:53] My initial relationship to...

Duration:00:32:54

Toxic Shame that Follows Me

12/20/2022
Sexual abuse has impacted me in many ways: issues with overgiving, boundaries, people pleasing, shame, and intimacy have followed me in my life. I have suffered in physical pain to ignore emotional discomfort with these emotions. This has shown me that I need to confront these feelings and work through the trauma that sexual abuse has left me with. Key Takeaways: [3:33] Having issues with overgiving [6:05] Being anxious and overbearing [7:32] Feeling on the outskirts of my friend...

Duration:00:37:13

I Self Sabotage

12/13/2022
I really, really struggle with self sabotage in every aspect of my life. From relationships, to not following through on things, to recreating trauma. It is an endless battle. I am working to better myself by being introspective and examining why I constantly sabotage myself and what I can do to work on it. Key Takeaways: [1:35] Self sabotage and regret in my life [4:09] Physical and emotional stress can make us stronger [6:02] Self sabotaging in an effort to protect myself [9:48]...

Duration:00:51:53

Feeling my Age Sink In

12/6/2022
After my daughter’s death I began to truly feel my age sink in. I gained weight, had trauma induced menopause, and body dysmorphia. I struggled and not only lost my daughter, but lost many people I cared for in life. Nothing was the same and trying to find a way to heal myself is an ongoing journey. Key Takeaways: [2:14] Feeling old after Molly’s death [4:04] Losing everything, not just Molly and gaining weight [6:27] Trauma induced menopause and body dysmorphia [10:04] Having a...

Duration:00:37:39

Impact of Generational Trauma

11/29/2022
Intergenerational trauma is something that has plagued my family and I’m trying to change it, but it feels like a burden to bear. Growing up, having to keep secrets and not having my basic needs met has made me evaluate how that’s impacted my parenting today. I have many things to work through with many different types of therapies at my disposal, but it will take time to wade through this generational trauma. Key Takeaways: [1:22] Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs [6:36] Physical safety in...

Duration:00:50:32

My Childhood Sexual Abuse

11/22/2022
I was sexually abused as a child and it still impacts me at almost 60 years old. It took me a long time to be able to tell this story and to look back at the psychological impact that these terrible experiences had on me. It was a confusing time where I lost so much of myself, but telling this story has been cathartic. If you need help there are resources below. Key Takeaways: [2:45] My mom was a stay at home mother and my dad worked a lot [4:20] First instance of sexual abuse [6:46]...

Duration:01:00:24

The Calm Before the Storm

11/15/2022
Elementary school and the 60s feels like the last time I felt okay before I began 4th grade. My mom was a young mom, my dad worked all day, and I spent my summers outside at the public pool. When school was in session I dealt with sexist teachers and when I left for the day I went to church 3 times a week. In this episode, I dive deep into my generational identity and the calm before the storm. Key Takeaways: [2:15] I don’t identify as a boomer and being born into a time of...

Duration:00:54:57

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