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A Thousand Tiny Steps

Health & Wellness Podcasts

This podcast is for people who want to experience personal growth. Finding joy in tragic moments is a difficult task, but by listening to the stories of an ordinary woman who goes through extraordinary experiences, you can learn how to get through anything. Hear stories from Barb Higgins, the woman who had a baby at 57, lost her daughter to a brain tumor, dealt with addiction, and so much more. Inside each episode, Barb shares a story from her life and how she got through each tough experience. From lessons learned to how she took her self-care to another level, Barb pulls you into her world of inspiring circumstances and leaves you wondering, how does she do it?

Location:

United States

Description:

This podcast is for people who want to experience personal growth. Finding joy in tragic moments is a difficult task, but by listening to the stories of an ordinary woman who goes through extraordinary experiences, you can learn how to get through anything. Hear stories from Barb Higgins, the woman who had a baby at 57, lost her daughter to a brain tumor, dealt with addiction, and so much more. Inside each episode, Barb shares a story from her life and how she got through each tough experience. From lessons learned to how she took her self-care to another level, Barb pulls you into her world of inspiring circumstances and leaves you wondering, how does she do it?

Language:

English


Episodes

The Aftereffects of Sexual Abuse

2/20/2024
I listened to the story of Debbie, a woman who was sexually abused in childhood and I truly resonate with. From the way we were both told to be quiet about our abuse, our journeys of healing, and our coping mechanisms. In this episode, I look at common things things that go through the minds of children who suffer from sexual abuse. Key Takeaways: [3:19] Debbie works with a non-profit to help people that are sexually abused [4:47] Debbie’s story of being sexually abused by her stepfather [7:14] Debbie’s journey with therapy and processing emotions [9:04] The similarities between Debbie and I’s story [15:21] Everyone told me to be quiet about the abuse and he never got punished [18:59] I wondered how I could change my behavior so I wouldn’t be abused [20:47] How did Debbie’s mom not know it was happening? [22:32] Sexual abuse seems high in athletics [24:04] My coping mechanisms have followed me in adulthood [26:00] My healing journey with abuse is not linear [27:03] January has not gone well [28:51] Asking for help as people who have suffered from abuse Resources: Family Secrets podcast The Joyful Heart episode Joyful Heart Foundation Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:31:01

Living with POTS after COVID with Rosie & Lauren

2/13/2024
Rosie came on with her partner Lauren to tell her story of getting POTS after having COVID and how it’s affecting her life now. She’s currently in the process of trying to get a service dog which will hopefully help give her more independence. In this episode, we chat about what it’s like to have your partner be your caregiver and rethinking your life plans. Key Takeaways: [2:35] Getting COVID and then a high heart rate [8:30] Getting diagnosed with POTS early, but having to leave rugby [10:26] Realizing that this was going to be a life altering condition [13:05] How POTS effects Rosie in her everyday life [17:31] There’s no official treatment for POTS [21:32] How life has changed and not being able to drink alcohol [25:32] Why Rosie wants a service dog [29:49] Applying to get a service dog, getting rejected, and finally being accepted [35:43] Rosie’s fundraising efforts and how you can help [38:46] Her family struggled to understand her illness, but are supportive [42:08] Living with POTS has been compared to heart failure [43:49] Learning how to ask for help [45:01] Where you can donate money and learn more about POTS [45:51] POTS is an invisible illness, but it’s valid [46:31] Growing up much quicker because of chronic illness Resources: Rosie’s campaign page Rosie’s facebook ECAD Info about POTS Info on COVID and POTS Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:49:15

Can I Make My Life Count?

2/6/2024
When I talk to my friends about aging we’re all in this spot where we feel somewhat unfulfilled by life, like somethings missing. It makes me wonder what’s wrong and where in my life I need to improve. In this episode, I look at where I am in Erickson’s stages of development and how I don’t always fit into my age group because I’m an older mom. Key Takeaways: [1:59] I’ve lost my social life [3:56] Being an older mom is isolating [6:06] This phenomenon of being like we’re lost in older age [10:55] Eric Erickson’s stages of development and where I’m at [14:38] Stagnation in this period of life [17:09] Just having my family and not many relationships outside of that [19:08] Can I make my life count? [21:55] Taking care of my family and aging parents [23:01] I’m wondering if CrossFit coaching fits into my life right now [25:00] Feeling powerless and unappreciated in school board [26:14] I’m working on my strength and nutrition [28:12] Working on my social relationships Resources: Crossfit Lady podcast episode More Milk Please podcast episode Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:31:11

I'm Working on Slowing Down

1/30/2024
As January ends, I realize I need to reevaluate when I make goals and what a routine looks like for me. I also take time off coaching, slow down, and try to enjoy the moment which is difficult for me. But through it all I am working on creating the life I want. Key Takeaways: [1:17] New Year’s goals don’t work for me and letting go of 75 Hard [4:15] Taking time off from coaching [5:58] Why slowing down is hard for me [7:53] Kenny and I’s different views on alcohol consumption [14:03] Jack truly notices my emotions [15:31] You can’t expedite growth and struggling with staying in the moment [18:18] I’ve been slowly cutting things out that aren’t helpful [19:19] Finding peace in just being alive [23:20] Making my stop list bigger than my to do list [25:41] Getting better at stillness and creating a routine that works [31:03] I always have something to be angry at [32:26] Creating the lifestyle I want Resources: Crossfit Lady podcast episode Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:36:03

The Social Impact of Concord’s Thrift Store

1/23/2024
Thrifting clothes is such an important way to be both sustainable and give back to the community. I talked to students and teachers at my local high school to discuss their on site thrift shop, the change it’s making in their community, and the conversations around social impact it brings about. Key Takeaways: [1:29] Concord’s sustainable thrift shop and how it came to be [8:16] Using thrifted fabric to sew plus sized clothes [12:20] How the concept of sustainability has changed [14:04] Running a thrift shop gives kids life skills [18:21] Behind the scenes of running the shop [21:35] The most donated items and gaining more financial support [26:39] Students get clothing for their parents and siblings as well [27:17] How to donate new items and what’s most needed [31:43] How the kids are going to use these life skills [33:43] The ultimate dream of the thrift store [35:58] Please donate if you can Resources: The MollyB Foundation The CrossFit Lady podcast CHS Thrift Shop You can contact CHS by email: jspeidel@sau8.org Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:40:08

Chronic Anger is Just Resentment

1/16/2024
I feel a lot of anger in my life and I’m diving deep to see what I’m holding on to. Along the way I discover my healing crisis and how anger fits into the 5 stages of grief. In this episode, I’ll find strategies to deal with my anger and what I need to focus on in the new year. Key Takeaways: [1:58] Starting the new year angry [5:00] Chronic anger is more resentment [6:32] Why I’m angry at home [9:38] Being iced out of the school board [15:35] Asserting aggression to avoid helpless feelings [20:39] Strategies to deal with anger and how I’m doing it [24:22] What anger am I holding on to and what triggers me? [29:27] I feel like I constantly have to defend myself [30:31] Having a healing crisis [35:21] Realizing the 75 Hard is not what I want to be doing [37:32] Here’s my summary on anger Resources: My book Motherland Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:40:42

Peeling Back the Layers of Myself

1/9/2024
As we do the kitchen renovation, we’ve found layers upon layers of wallpaper and flooring. This is much like the multitude of layers of my person. I keep saying I’m going to change things and instead I rush around. So now I’m finding new ways to cope and be a better parent for Jack and Gracie. Key Takeaways: [1:00] The walls of my house hold stories [2:28] The layers of flooring throughout the years [5:51] I make these goals and I don’t follow through year after year [8:41] Water damage in the floor [11:38] I have to stop rushing around 24/7 and be present [13:32] Doing 75 Hard again [15:28] Thinking about taking time off [17:00] Struggling emotionally with recording Motherland [19:29] My house is in chaos [22:19] We don’t have a social circle and motherless daughters [25:01] Feeling like a distant mother [28:51] I got journals for both Gracie and I [34:05] The song that makes me cry, but brings Jack joy [36:21] The afterword of my book Resources: My book Motherland Voice Over Vermont Motherless Daughters Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:43:41

What Does Being Humane Mean?

1/2/2024
While doing our home renovation we discovered a whole treasure trove of things in the walls. One of those things was a book on humane education by an amazing woman, Irene Hart who changed the history of education for New Hampshire and helped to advance women's rights. Key Takeaways: [1:02] I’m still making edits to my book [5:14] The things in the walls of out house and the amazing Irene Hart [10:16] The book on humane education for being kind to animals [17:16] What incredible stuff I’ve done this year [18:36] What humanity is about [19:59] My New Year’s resolutions for the year [22:35] The language we use to describe other people [24:19] This book reminds me of Molly [24:48] My past New Year’s experiences [26:22] How Molly’s kindness and sense of justice helped others [31:31] What I need to work on in my life Resources: My book Motherland Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:38:53

The Secrets to Living to 100

12/26/2023
I recently watched a documentary on living to 100 and what special things people did in certain communities to allow them to live that long. Some of it was not surprising and other parts were. There was so much information that I took from this documentary and I made a plan to make improvements to my own life. Key Takeaways: [1:46] The premise of the documentary [4:31] Looking at four things: movement, outlook, connection, and eating [10:03] The power 9: nine things that go into living to 100 [17:18] How Okinawa is such a healthy society [20:20] Sardina, a little island in Italy that keeps moving [22:27] The high stress levels in American society [25:39] Ikaria, Greece and their resilient community [30:40] The blue zones in America [34:55] Costa Rica’s sense of purpose [36:47] Singapore’s subsidized food and housing [41:57] Trying to create blue zones in America [43:58] What I’m doing in my life to incorporate healthy habits [49:40] Taking care of the body, mind, and spirit Resources: Living to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zone Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:52:31

The Holiday Woes

12/19/2023
The holidays are upon us again and as always it’s a rollercoaster. The MollyB basket went differently this year than it had previously and that was an adjustment for us all. On top of that, I’ve had to navigate how to spend Christmas with Jack growing older. Key Takeaways: [1:16] Losing your child is different than losing someone older [6:42] Molly loved the holidays when they danced in the holiday show [9:12] The person that won the MollyB basket [20:05] The chapter of Motherland about Gracie [34:31] Past Christmases and how we are going to spend this one [37:08] What’s coming up in my life Resources: My book Motherland Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:40:07

Creating Double Binds

12/12/2023
My business coach introduced me to double binds and it makes so much sense. I’ve created them, but a lot of other people in my life have too and it has wreaked havoc. I can now look back on past relationships and why it wasn't working. In this episode, I explore the psychological aspects and my own experience. Key Takeaways: [0:42] What a double bind is, the one I created, and some examples [9:49] The two families that created a double bind for me in childhood over religion [16:22] The psychology behind it and children not understanding [19:54] Having internal double binds with relationships [22:25] Examples of double binds in media [25:25] Double binds in politics [27:52] My Christmas with Roy and how he created a double bind [34:06] The double bind with Roy after Molly died [38:12] Different examples of double binds in movies and life [43:12] Not having romantic relationships and my current family dynamic [45:34] We all have a chance to leave a double bind [47:26] How I’m feeling about the holiday season Resources: Gaslight Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:50:15

Starting CrossFit as an Older Woman with Leda Peterson

12/5/2023
Leda Peterson is a wonderful CrossFit athlete helping women over 50 get into CrossFit. She knew she had to change her life and get in shape, but she was nervous about starting CrossFit at an older age. In this episode, we discuss how she overcame that and her experience growing up as an immigrant with a single mom. Key Takeaways: [1:56] Leda’s immigrant experience from El Salvador [4:51] Moving across the country and changing her health [8:01] Leda finding a CrossFit gym and wondering if she could at 43 years old [10:51] Why she does CrossFit and her first workout experience [13:16] How setting goals helped Leda achieve her dreams [18:26] CrossFit is not just about the workout, it’s about the community [22:45] Leda’s experience being a coach helping older women [25:28] Leda’s story of being held at knifepoint [29:46] The trauma that gets passed down from generations Resources: Leda’s podcast Leda’s Instagram The Body Keeps the Score Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:34:51

Stop Telling Women To Be Quiet

11/28/2023
I’m tired of people telling women to be quiet. In today’s age, so many minority groups pit themselves against another minority group and I sometimes don’t understand whose benefit that is. This is part of why I wrote Motherland. I was tired of being told to silence myself. Key Takeaways: [1:22] My interview on running with Brooke [2:14] Why people run in correlation with mental health [5:33] The pressure on female athletes during Title IX [11:25] Minority groups pitting themselves against one another [14:15] How conservatives and liberals fight [19:44] Reading Chapter 27 of Motherland: In Real Life [34:19] Stop telling women to stop talking [37:10] What’s next for the podcast Resources: Buy Motherland here Brooke’s podcast Silence of Great Distance book Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:39:07

Being Open About Death

11/21/2023
In the 70s when my best friend died, I didn’t know because it wasn’t talked about. This had a lifelong impact on me full of grief and reflection. This is why when Molly died I decided to let all her friends know what was happening and allow anyone who wanted to come and visit. Being open about the process was a way to heal a wound of the past. Key Takeaways: [1:55] My childhood best friend died and I didn’t know [4:23] Walking to the funeral but not being allowed to go to the cemetery [7:10] Reading the chapter of my book about Moira [14:18] Seeing her gravestone for the first time decades later [16:48] Death is still seen as taboo [18:23] Finding out Moira died from the newspaper [20:01] Being public versus private about your grief [23:02] I hope my book resonates with a lot of people Resources: Buy Motherland here Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:25:39

Processing the Messy Middle

11/14/2023
It seems like everyone around me is dying as I grow older. It’s a lot to process and has led me on a journey of looking into the 5 stages of grief and finding a 6th stage too. I think about the stage that I’m in versus others around me and how that affects our interactions with one another. Key Takeaways: [1:21] My friend Rusty died from cancer and his wife died too [3:15] Knowing someone’s going to die versus it being unexpected [4:51] All these people in my life are passing away [5:57] Eric Erickson’s stages of development [14:37] The stage that I’m in now [17:40] The final stages [21:38] People’s responses to my book [25:14] The 6th stage of grief and what’s wrong with the 5 stages [31:26] Processing the messy middle [34:29] Renovating Mr. Luti’s house [39:55] I’m processing a lot of emotion right now Resources: Buy Motherland here Finding Meaning book On Death and Dying book More Milk Please podcast CrossFit Lady podcast Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:43:20

The Seasons of Change

11/7/2023
The kitchen updates continue to terrify and excite me as I remember all the times that we spent as a family in the kitchen where Molly sat. I also had my book launch and so many people I wasn’t expecting came out to support me. Key Takeaways: [1:16] Updating the kitchen and letting go [5:43] New landscaping changes [7:14] Landscaping coaches house too [8:03] My memories in the kitchen with the girls [14:10] 85 people showed up to my book launch! [18:13] I had amazing conversations about the book [20:30] I’m exhausted as the seasons change [21:34] The kitchen poem Resources: Buy Motherland here Pearl Bailey kitchen poem Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:28:25

The Power of Friendship

10/31/2023
I’ve been thinking lately about the people I surround myself with, what that means, and the wonderful support I receive. It’s interesting to look back and see the toxic people I spent time with and how much my life has changed since then. Key Takeaways: [1:36] Susan is someone who brings me so much joy [4:13] Roberta learns so much about me through my podcast [7:04] Deb has been my friend since middle school [10:20] The most important people I’ve been friends with since childhood [11:28] The importance of who I’m surrounding myself with [17:01] Am I facilitating healthy friendships? [18:09] What I’m up to Resources: Buy Motherland here Karen Kenney Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:20:41

The Giving Tree

10/24/2023
We recently had to chop down a tree that has been on our property for years. It brings me great sorrow because change is difficult for me. I have so many memories of Gracie and Molly playing under the tree and now that it’s gone it’s like a piece of Molly is gone as well. But with these changes, I begin anew. Key Takeaways: [0:46] I didn’t like The Giving Tree when I read it [1:37] How we bought the house we live in [3:53] The early years of living in the house [5:15] The tree starting to show signs of aging [7:56] Remembering how the kids swung on the tree [11:54] We took a lot from the tree, but didn’t take it for granted [12:41] Rocky removed the tree and cried with me [17:11] The tree was proof that Molly was here [19:06] The book launch, kitchen remodeling, and dance [21:01] When molly died, we didn’t have energy to tend to the yard [22:59] You can feel the sadness amongst the joy [23:55] My book signing and email newsletter [25:46] The seasons of my podcast and a possible new book Resources: Buy Motherland here + the book signing The Giving Tree Virginia and all her books Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:28:12

Writing Motherland with Virginia Macgregor

10/17/2023
Virginia uses societal issues and turns them into beautiful stories. For the past few years she has helped me write my own story, Motherland which you can pre-order online. We spent hundreds of hours exchanging voice messages and crafting the story of Molly. Key Takeaways: [0:46] Virginia helped me write my book, Motherland [2:10] How Virginia got into writing books full time [5:05] How Virginia comes up with stories [8:49] How she got into the mindset of someone with child loss [12:42] Talking about deciding to write the book [18:28] Writing a biography vs writing a fictional story [22:15] Barb’s story seemed too strange to be real [26:15] Jack doesn’t replace Molly [28:35] How Virginia told the story truthfully while cutting things from it [32:50] What happens at a book signing Resources: Buy Motherland here A Heart That Works Virginia and all her books Virginia’s Instagram Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:42:48

Everything Happens For A Reason

10/10/2023
The phrase “everything happens for a reason” drives me crazy. I found a new friend, Caitlin to commiserate with over this topic. We did CrossFit together and had the most wonderful conversation surrounding the timeline of grieving and society's opinions on it. Key Takeaways: [0:35] The old Barb vs the new [2:46] Does everything happen for a reason? [6:56] Meeting Caitlin who lost her husband [9:39] Society's idea of when you should move on [13:42] My choices heavily influence my life as well it’s not just ‘fate’ [14:52] People try to be comforting, but they just make me angry [16:01] What Caitlin and Dan did in their lives [18:07] CrossFit changed my life and gave me a community [20:01] Stillness can be safety in grief [23:34] Still trying to live life in spite of death [24:59] Your grief is okay and is not a burden [26:48] I do believe I was meant to meet Caitlin [29:22] The phrase feels judgemental even if people don’t mean it like that [31:18] My new kitchen is coming along and my book is coming out! Resources: My blog post about Caitlin Heart and the Bottle book Connect with Barb: Website Facebook Instagram Be a guest on the podcast YouTube The Molly B Foundation

Duration:00:34:13