Husband Material

How can a couple devastated by porn heal, grow, and become even stronger? In this episode, Rich and Deanna Millentree tell their incredible story. "We're Rich and DeAnna Millentree and we love growing in marriage! We've ridden the rollercoaster of marriage for over 28 years. The ups are exhilarating, but the downs are daunting. As Christian Marriage Coaches, we have one big goal: guide couples to ignite deep, lasting connections to Jesus and one another—no matter where your marriage is at. Together, we will help you break the bad habits that have left you feeling like distant roommates. Let us help you find your vibe." Connect with Rich and Deanna here: growinginmarriage.comgrowinginmarriage.com/podcastgrowinginmarriage.com/chmgrowinginmarriage.com/couplesinstagram.com/growinginmarriageTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

In this episode, I transform one of my triggers using The F.L.O.S.S. Method with help from three Certified Husband Material Coaches: Andrew Loyd, Juan Mejia, and Rocky Pisor. This episode was recorded live at the recent HMA In A Day workshop as a live demonstration of Trigger Tuesday, one of the weekly coaching calls in Husband Material Academy. The F.L.O.S.S. Method: F = Fear L = Lie O = Origin Story S = Sadness S = Surrender Drew Boa is a Pastoral Sex Addiction Professional and Coach in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Connect with Drew at drewboa.com Andrew Loyd is an Ordained Pastor and Coach in Cottage Grove, Oregon. Connect with Andrew at restoredstorycoaching.com Juan Mejia is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Coach in Atlanta, Georgia. Email Juan at juanmejiacounseling@gmail.com. Rocky Pisor is a Pastoral Counselor and Coach in Fresno, California. Connect with Rocky at reconnecthope.com Free resource mentioned in this episode: What If I Don't Remember Much Of My Childhood?Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Triggers don't have to be tyrants. In this episode, you'll learn how to transform your triggers from threats into opportunities for healing using The F.LO.S.S. Method. This episode is an excerpt from the recent HMA In A Day workshop. The F.L.O.S.S. Method: F = Fear L = Lie O = Origin Story S = Sadness S = Surrender Free resource mentioned in this episode: HMA Preview Lessonhusbandmaterial.com/hma-previewTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Tera Brown went from trying to fix her husband's sex addiction to finding herself, her emotions, her boundaries, and her sacred ground. In this episode, you'll learn what it looks like to heal from relational trauma and feel alive in your body. Tera Brown is a trauma-informed life coach trained by APSATS (Association of Partners of Sex Addiction Treatment Specialists). She woke up from a lifelong pattern of avoiding her emotions when her husband disclosed his sex addiction after 16 years of marriage. Tera and her husband have now been married for 29 years. Tera specializes in helping women and couples create personal safety, emotional sobriety, and peace. Learn more about her coaching practice, support groups, and online classes at coachtera.com. Interested in Tera's experiential retreat? Check out La Loba: The Woman Who Knows Next retreat: October 18-20, 2024 in Smithfield, Utah Mentioned in this episode: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz (paid link) Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

How do I sit in the dirt with someone who is experiencing sexual brokenness? What if I don't know what to say? What if I find myself dysregulated or sexually aroused by the other person? Jeremy Williamson offers invaluable wisdom and counterintuitive clarity about how "be with" others in such a way that they experience the presence of God. Jeremy Williamson is a storywork coach and counselor with ReStory. He is also the Director of Restorative Experiences at Restoration Project. As a former pastor and missionary with 20+ years of experience, Jeremy serves as a kind and passionate guide for men and women who long to know God and live in wholeness. Email Jeremy at jeremy@restory.life. If you loved this interview... Sitting In The Dirt CourseSitting In The Dirt Cohort Use the discount code HUSBANDMATERIAL for $10 off! Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Have you ever been disappointed by traditional counseling or talk therapy? In this episode, you'll discover the power of a whole-brain approach to outgrowing porn. You'll learn the why, what, and how of experiential healing work. This episode is required viewing for my clients. Related episodes: How To Heal Your Inner ChildExperience Healing Through IFSExperience Healing Through The Immanuel ApproachExperience Healing Through PsychodramaHealing Through Artwork And StoryworkAttunement: The Key To Connection Are you interested in doing experiential healing work? joinHMA.comdrewboa.com/applicationhusbandmaterial.com/applyTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

How do you pursue restoration after a relapse, especially in marriage or ministry leadership? Rocky Pisor tells his own story of processing a porn relapse after 17 years of sobriety. You'll learn how to notice the warning signs of impending relapse, and how to respond to relapse with curiosity and compassion rather than punishing yourself or pretending like everything is fine. There is wisdom in this episode! Rocky Pisor is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Sex Addiction Mentor, Trauma-Informed Facilitator, and Pastoral Counselor who has worked through his own story of freedom from sex addiction. Learn more at regener8mentoring.com Read Rocky's free resource: How to Process a Lapse/Relapse Schedule a free, no-obligation personal chat with Rocky: https://calendly.com/rocky-pisor/quick-chat Email Rocky at rockyp@regnener8mentoring.com Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

"There is nothing inherently wrong with an aroused man." What is arousal? Why is it good? Sam Jolman helps us reclaim the heart of masculine sexuality for the purpose of awe, play, and worshipping God. You'll learn how arousal always has a script, why evil hates arousal, and the difference between sexuality and sensuality. At the end, you'll receive a beautiful blessing from Sam. This episode is amazing! Sam Jolman (MA, LPC) is a trauma therapist with over twenty years of experience specializing in men’s issues and sexual trauma recovery. His writing flows out of this unique opportunity to help people know and heal their stories, and find greater sexual wholeness and aliveness. He received his master’s in counseling from Reformed Theological Seminary and was further trained in Narrative Focused Trauma Care through the Allender Center at The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology. Sam lives in Colorado with his wife and three sons. Fun fact: Sam and Drew attend the same church! Buy Sam's new book (paid link): The Sex Talk You Never Got: Reclaiming the Heart of Masculine Sexuality Join Sam's newsletter for a free copy of the first chapter: samjolman.substack.com Learn more and connect with Sam at samjolman.com Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Why do I struggle with gay porn? What does freedom look like? How can I stop using gay porn? In this episode, I answer these questions based on years of research and helping hundreds of men achieve lasting freedom from gay porn. Recommended resources (including paid links): Healing And Recovery: Perspective For Young Men With Sexualized AttachmentsMan Cards: Conversation Starters For MenRelated episodes of Husband Material: Why We Sexualize Emotions And How To Desexualize ThemHow To Interpret Sexual FantasiesWhat If I'm Sexually Attracted To Myself?How My Sexual Fetish Shifted Over TimeThe Exact Path To Freedom From PornReady to pursue freedom from gay porn? Join the waitlist for HMA at joinHMA.com ***Save the date: HMA in a Day on Saturday, July 13, 2024!*** Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What's the point of processing childhood experiences? In this special episode recorded live at the Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit, Drew, Doug, Eddie, and Matt share insights and stories about how processing childhood experiences can help you outgrow porn. Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com Dr. Doug Carpenter is a clinical psychologist and the co-owner of Insight Counseling Services in Rochester, Michigan. He's the author of "Childhood Trauma and the Non-Alpha Male." Eddie Capparucci is a Christian therapist who specializes in the treatment of sexual and pornography addiction. He's the creator of the Inner Child Recovery Process (ICRP) and the author of "Going Deeper: How The Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction." Matt Wenger is the clinical director of Boulder Recovery, a 14-day intensive for men struggling with sex, porn, and relationship issues and their impact on faith. The program uses the TINSA treatment model (Trauma-Induced Sexual Addiction) to heal the traumatic experiences and attachment wounds driving addictive behaviors and problematic thinking around sex and intimacy. You can also watch the video version here: www.husbandmaterial.com Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Why do we sexualize emotions, and how can we desexualize them? In this episode, I explain what it looks like to "right-size" sexual energy through processing emotions and releasing trauma. Free tools to process emotions: Feelings And Needs WheelFeelings And Needs Inventory Ready to release some trauma? Come to the Husband Material Retreat in Colorado on September 6-10, 2024. Sign up at husbandmaterial.com/retreat "Before the retreat, I was plagued with an overwhelming sense of sadness that I could ignore for a while but never escape. During the retreat, I was able to access my suppressed, righteous anger, experience it, and direct it for good." —Scott Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What happens when you feel entitled to sex and treat your wife like a replacement for porn? In this episode, Noah Filipiak tells his story of overcoming sexual entitlement and objectification. Along the way, he unpacks the false promises of purity culture, what love really looks like, how God's grace changes us, and the power of gratitude. Noah Filipiak is a pastor, author, and the host of The Flip Side Podcast. He also blogs at noahfilipiak.com. Noah and his wife Jen have three daughters. He is on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram @noahfilipiak. Buy Noah's book (this is a paid link): Beyond the Battle: A Man’s Guide To His Identity In Christ In An Oversexualized World Needed Navigation: A Teen’s Guide to His or Her Identity in Christ in a Sex & Porn-Filled World Join a 7-week online group with Noah to experience how to overcome pornography, lust, and fantasy. After the 7 weeks, alumni get to join the free Beyond the Battle alumni community filled with ongoing support and encouragement. Sign up at www.beyondthebattle.net. Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What is the definition of sexless marriage? Why do couples experience this? Sexless marriage is often a symptom of deeper psychosomatic issues. Adam and Karissa teach practical tools to build a sexful marriage through vulnerability, intimacy, and safe touch. This episode can also help couples for whom intercourse is painful or not possible. Adam and Karissa King are a licensed coach/therapist team and the founders of Dear Young Married Couple, where they help couples become intimately connected, get adventurous, and find purpose. Free download: 5 Steps When Trust Has Been Broken Free download: Because, Because, Because Check out Adam and Karissa's EROS Conference: dearyoungmarriedcouple.com/eros My wife and I attended and it was exactly what we needed! Buy Adam and Karissa's Card Decks For Couples (these are paid links): FOUNDATIONS - Questions And Tips To Become More Connected REALIZATIONS - See How Well You Know Your Significant Other SEXPECTATIONS - Talk Openly About Sex Without Having Sex Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

How do you respond to someone else's story with curiosity and compassion? In part 4 of this 4 part series, Marcus Spaur shares his story: "If I Only Could Have Been..." If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at bishopmoss@gmail.com Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at chris@np-recovery.com Resources for responding to someone else's story: Attunement: The Key To ConnectionHow To Create Connection In Any ConversationTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

How do you write a story about your trauma and sexual experiences? In part 3 of this 4-part series, Wendell Moss shares his story: "Sex & Sexuality" If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at bishopmoss@gmail.com Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at chris@np-recovery.com Resources For Story Writing (including paid links): Story Writing ResourcesExpressive Writing: Words That HealTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

Why is story work absolutely essential for men outgrowing porn? In part 2 of this 4 part series, Chris Inman shares his story: "The Lonely Walk." If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at bishopmoss@gmail.com Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at chris@np-recovery.com Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What is story work? Where did it come from? What does it look like? In part 1 of this 4-part series, Drew shares his story: "The Day I Got Braces." If you love this series, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at bishopmoss@gmail.com Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at chris@np-recovery.com Resources for Story Work: The Allender CenterAllender TheoryUnwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way To HealingRedeeming HeartacheThe Place We Find OurselvesThe ReStory CourseTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What is inner healing prayer, and how can it help men outgrow porn? This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com Resources for Inner Healing Prayer: Streams of Healing: Finding Your Way to Wholeness with Key Leaders in the Inner Healing MovementIntroduction To Healing PrayerExperience Healing Through The Immanuel ApproachTransformation Prayer MinistryListening To ImmanuelTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

What is Polyvagal Theory? How can it help men outgrow porn? John Kilmer skillfully describes the autonomic nervous system and how to (re)shape it in order to experience regulation without unwanted sexual behavior. John Kilmer is a Mental Health Life Coach, Occupational Therapist, and Certified Husband Material Coach. John has completed the Foundations of Polyvagal Informed Practice Clinical Training Series with Deb Dana. He's a grateful follower of Jesus who is passionate about men's inner healing work. Learn more about John at relaxedcaregiver.com. This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com Books on Polyvagal Theory (these are paid links): AnchoredPolyvagal Theory in TherapyThe Pocket Guide To The Polyvagal TheoryTake the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***

We need a theology of trauma. In this episode, Matt Wenger powerfully invites us to view our trauma through the lens of Jesus's life, death, and resurrection. This episode is a preview of our new online course at healyourtrauma.com Matt Wenger is the clinical director of Boulder Recovery, a 14-day intensive for Christian men struggling with sex, porn, and relationship issues. Boulder Recovery uses the TINSA treatment model (Trauma-Induced Sexual Addiction) to heal the traumatic experiences and attachment wounds driving addictive behaviors and problematic thinking around sex and intimacy. EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT: Today, Matt Wenger and Drew Boa are releasing a new free online course called "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com Take the Husband Material Journey... YouTubeHusband Material CommunityHow To Outgrow PornHusband Material Academy Thanks for listening! *** HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com The doors will close on Sunday, July 21. ***