Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast

This week on The ADHD Podcast, Pete and Nikki sit down with Dr. Celine Saulnier, a specialist in diagnostic assessment and research on autism spectrum disorders. The conversation delves into the complex relationship between ADHD and autism, shedding light on the often misunderstood overlap between these two neurodevelopmental conditions. Dr. Saulnier explains the evolving diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and how changes in the DSM-5 have allowed for the co-occurring diagnosis of ADHD and autism. She explores the similarities and differences between the two conditions, including the shared challenges with executive functioning and the distinct underlying causes of apparently similar behaviors. The discussion also touches on the unique challenges faced by females with autism, who often fly under the diagnostic radar due to their ability to mask or camouflage their symptoms. Dr. Saulnier emphasizes the importance of comprehensive evaluations by clinicians with expertise in both ADHD and autism to ensure accurate diagnoses and appropriate treatment plans. They navigate the nuances of neurodiversity, the divide within the autism community, and the need for increased awareness and acceptance of neurodiverse individuals. This conversation offers insights for anyone seeking to better understand the complexities of ADHD, autism, and their intersection. Links & Notes Meghan Miller on Autism and ADHD risk in siblingsThe Gap Between Adaptive Behavior and Intelligence in Autism Persists into Young Adulthood and is Linked to Psychiatric Co-morbiditiesA review of executive function deficits in autism spectrum disorder and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorderThe Reach and Accuracy of Information on Autism on TikTokDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This week, Nikki and Pete dive into the complex and often overlooked relationship between Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and eating disorders. Joined by special guest Dr. Jean Doak, a professor of psychiatry and clinical director at the Center for Excellence for Eating Disorders at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the trio explores how these two conditions can intertwine and exacerbate each other. Dr. Doak sheds light on the broad spectrum of eating disorders, extending far beyond the commonly known anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa. She emphasizes that eating disorders can manifest in various ways, affecting people of all genders and ages. The discussion delves into the biopsychosocial model, which considers biological, psychological, and social factors contributing to the development of both ADHD and eating disorders. Dr. Doak explores the similarities between ADHD and eating disorders, such as perfectionism, poor impulse control, and difficulties with delayed gratification. They stress the importance of comprehensive screening for co-occurring mental health disorders to provide early intervention and treatment. This episode sheds light on a topic that is often misunderstood. It serves as a reminder for clinicians, individuals with ADHD, and their loved ones to be aware of the potential comorbidity between ADHD and eating disorders. By fostering open discussions and increasing awareness, we can work towards better recognition, support, and treatment for those affected by these challenging conditions. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This week, we delve into the introspective realm of self-discovery, exploring the profound impact of understanding the reasons behind our behaviors and actions. The big question: does knowing the difference between ADHD-related struggles and those common to everyone truly matter? We also touch upon the intricate relationship between ADHD and identity, acknowledging the prevalence of the comparison game within the ADHD community. We know what it’s like to grapple with the fear of misdiagnosis and the paradoxical reluctance to hypothetically eradicate ADHD from our lives. Delving deeper into the human psyche, we explore the innate desire to find meaning and purpose behind our experiences. Knowing “ why” drives our actions and emotional reactions, from fostering moral development in children to cultivating mastery in students and nurturing personal relationships. It’s a challenging question and our hope is that we have offered a nuanced perspective on the significance of knowing the difference. While understanding the reasons behind our challenges may not provide an instant solution, it can offer a valuable framework for acceptance, perspective, and effective problem-solving. Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

In this episode of The ADHD Podcast, we delve into the complex and often misunderstood connection between Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Joined by Dr. Roberto Olivardia, a renowned Clinical Psychologist and Lecturer at Harvard Medical School, the trio embarks on a journey to unravel the intricacies of these two conditions and shed light on the challenges faced by those who experience them simultaneously. With his extensive expertise in treating ADHD, OCD, and Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Dr. Olivardia provides invaluable insights into the signs, symptoms, and treatments associated with OCD. He explores the common misconceptions surrounding the disorder and discusses how the casual misuse of the term "OCD" in everyday conversation can hinder patients from receiving the proper recognition and support they need. As the conversation unfolds, we navigate the intricate relationship between ADHD and OCD, examining how the symptoms of one condition can influence and exacerbate the other. They explore the potential impact of ADHD's hyperfocus on OCD symptoms and delve into the effectiveness of treating both conditions simultaneously. Join us, and Dr. Olivardia as we embark on this exploration of the ADHD-OCD connection, offering a platform for understanding, empathy, and support for those navigating the complexities of these often intertwined conditions. Links & Notes CHADD Annual International Conference on ADHD 202429th Annual OCD Conference 2024Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This week on the show, we explore the topic of comorbidity with ADHD & Executive Functioning specialist, Dr. Michael Felt. As a lecturer at Yale University School of Medicine and a professor at Columbia University, Dr. Felt brings his knowledge to the discussion, focusing on the relationship between ADHD and comorbid conditions such as depression and anxiety. Dr. Felt's approach, known as Experiential Rehabilitation, has helped many individuals and organizations enhance their executive functioning, and now, listeners of The ADHD Podcast get a taste of the same. The conversation delves into the prevalence of comorbid diagnoses among individuals with ADHD. They discuss which condition is typically diagnosed first and whether the symptoms of depression and anxiety could be a result of untreated ADHD. The discussion also touches on the potential for misdiagnosis and the importance of healthcare providers considering comorbid conditions when assessing patients with ADHD. The episode also examines the impact of comorbid diagnoses on treatment protocols. They question whether the recommended treatments for depression and anxiety change when ADHD is also present and if these conditions are best treated by the same medical professional. Dr. Felt introduces listeners to his technique, Experiential Rehabilitation, and the "Cycle of Ambiguity” (ambiguity - anxiety - avoidance) and “Cycle of Clarity” (acceptance - acuity - agency - action). This science-based approach has helped numerous coaches, therapists, and individuals to reclaim control over their lives, offering hope for those struggling with ADHD and comorbid conditions. Links & Notes ADHDdoctor.orgDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This week, Dr. Dodge Rea rejoins us to explore the concept of Positive Affect Tolerance—the upper limit of how good we allow ourselves to feel before self-sabotage kicks in. Drawing from his integrative approach blending traditional psychology with ancient wisdom, Dr. Rea illuminates how this little-known phenomenon may be impacting those with ADHD far more than we realize. The conversation delves into the complex interplay between our psychological baggage and neurological wiring. Dr. Rea shares insights on how deep-seated shame often associated with ADHD can fuel a subconscious drive to undermine our own well-being, manifesting in behaviors like perpetual overcommitment and resistance to much-needed downtime. The episode sheds light on how gently expanding our capacity for positivity may be key to breaking cycles of burnout and reclaiming control over our schedules and lives. Dr. Rea reveals practical strategies, grounded in cutting-edge research and clinical expertise, to help listeners start strengthening this crucial "tolerance muscle." Such are the invisible forces shaping our daily experience and this week we look for a path to embracing the joy and ease we truly deserve. Links & Notes Dr. Dodge ReaWilliam Martin and the Gentle Path of the Tao Te ChingJerry Campbell and the Dynamic Tension Between Love and FearThe Change Paradox ArchivesDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Over the last few weeks, we have been exploring different topics related to our relationships and how we interact with others. Today, we welcome Dr. Ari Tuckman for a conversation about the relationship dynamic with one ADHD partner and one non-ADHD partner. From the ADHD partner who sees their non-ADHD counterpart as a savior to the frustrated couple struggling to bridge the communication gap, Tuckman explores the full spectrum of experiences that define these relationships. He delves into the emotional challenges that both partners face, offering a tantalizing glimpse into the world of resentment, shame, fear, and burnout that can threaten even the strongest of bonds. But Tuckman's exploration is not just a catalogue of challenges; it's a beacon of hope. He teases practical strategies and insights that promise to help couples navigate this complex terrain, hinting at the transformative power of communication, understanding, and compromise. Links & Notes More Attention, Less Deficit - Success Strategies for Adults with ADHDDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

In this special 600th episode of The ADHD Podcast, Nikki and Pete reflect on the show's 14-year journey. What began as a podcast focused on organization has evolved into a what we hope is a valuable resource for the ADHD community. Throughout the years, the show has featured a lineup of incredible and generous guests, including renowned ADHD researchers and experts such as Ned Hallowell, Russell Barkley, and Dr. William Dodson. The podcast's success has also led to the growth of the Taking Control ADHD (TCA) team, with the addition of Melissa, Bryan, and Marian. As the show has grown, so too have Nikki and Pete, both personally and professionally. They've navigated the joys and challenges of raising families, building businesses, and adapting to a changing world. Through it all, the Taking Control Podcast has remained a constant source of support, information, and inspiration for its listeners. As they mark this momentous milestone, Nikki and Pete express their heartfelt gratitude to their listeners and the ADHD community for making the past 600 episodes possible. Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

As we explore the intricate dance between parents, caregivers, and their children, the presence of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can profoundly influence this delicate balance. Parents with ADHD may find solace in shared struggles with their ADHD children, while facing frustration when their symptoms lead to setbacks with neurotypical children. On the other hand, parents without ADHD may struggle to understand the challenges their ADHD child faces, leading to a cycle of punishment and emotional wounds that linger into adulthood. In families with both ADHD and neurotypical children, the specter of favoritism can breed resentment and anger. The neurotypical child may feel neglected, while the child with ADHD may feel unfairly targeted. At the heart of this discord lies a breakdown in communication. Effective communication requires active listening and the recognition of non-verbal cues. Those with ADHD may struggle to articulate their needs and emotions, while those without ADHD may find it challenging to grasp the complexities of the condition. Rebuilding these bridges is no small feat, but progress is possible when all family members are committed to fostering healthier, more open dialogue. The journey towards better communication begins with introspection and asking tough questions about one's own actions, behaviors, and communication style. In times of struggle, seeking the guidance of a trained professional can provide invaluable support. Ultimately, the path to stronger family relationships lies in focusing on personal growth, communication, and understanding. By embracing empathy and compassion, families can begin to mend the invisible tightrope that binds them together. Links & Notes The Explosive ChildThe ADHD Podcast Ep 358: Mindful Listening for ADHD with Rebecca ShafirThe ADHD Podcast Episodes with Tamara RosierDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

In this week's episode of The ADHD Podcast, hosts Pete Wright and Nikki Kinzer explore the nuances of empathy for those with ADHD. Their guest, Dr. Tamara Rosier, recently presented on "The Unexpected Downside of Empathy" at the 2023 International ADHD Conference. Dr. Rosier, founder of the ADHD Center of West Michigan, explains that while empathy is often seen as a virtue, ADHDers may experience it in a more complicated way. Dr. Rosier outlines three main types of empathy: emotional, cognitive, and compassionate. Typically, employing all three types leads to well-regulated empathy. However, she notes that ADHDers frequently operate at extremes, either overly empathetic or non-empathetic. This imbalance leaves them vulnerable to several "downsides" of empathy. First, ADHDers may experience misplaced empathy, making excuses for other's inappropriate behavior. Second, getting stuck in emotional empathy can lead to empathetic distress and fatigue from taking on too many others' burdens. Dr. Rosier hypothesizes this stems from the ADHDer's desire to avoid rejection sensitivity. Third, ADHDers may underfunction by shutting down empathetically. Fourth, they may overfunction by overcompensating for other's lack of empathy. Finally, manipulative people can exploit the ADHDer's emotional empathy to gaslight without triggering their cognitive empathy. ADHD wiring leads to a complicated relationship with empathy. Our great thanks to Dr. Rosier for sharing her insights this week! Links & Notes Dr. Tamara RosierThe ADHD Center of West MichiganDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The popular 1944 film Gaslight brought the insidious behavior known as "gaslighting" into the public consciousness. But what exactly is gaslighting, and what does it have to do with ADHD? We explore this in today's episode of Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast. Dr. Deborah Vinall, author of the book Gaslighting: A Step-By-Step Recovery Guide, describes gaslighting as a pattern of behavior where one person systematically undermines another, typically as a means of gaining control. It goes beyond an occasional contradiction to a consistent effort to erode the other's confidence in their own perception of reality. So, what does this have to do with ADHD? As it turns out, quite a lot. People with ADHD are more vulnerable to gaslighting attempts for several reasons. Their symptoms of inattention, disorganization, and impulsivity are often used by gaslighters as ammunition to undermine their confidence. Being manipulated into questioning one's own memory and perception can then exacerbate ADHD symptoms like confusion, self-doubt, and struggles with focus and recall. At the same time, some behaviors driven by ADHD, like forgetfulness, tardiness, and fidgeting, can be misconstrued by others as deliberate gaslighting rather than unintentional neurological symptoms. It's important for others to understand ADHD is not an intentional or conscious effort to manipulate. Many with ADHD have experienced the painful effects of gaslighting. They describe feeling trivialized when their real daily struggles are dismissed as "dramatic" or something "everyone deals with." They feel overgeneralized and defeated when told they "never" follow through or "always" mess up, ignoring their successes. And they feel bewildered and betrayed when facts about their lives or promises made to them are denied outright by gaslighters insisting "that never happened." The good news is there are effective ways to maintain confidence and counter gaslighting with ADHD. Seeking external validation from professionals, friends, and family who understand the condition can provide reality checks when self-doubt creeps in. Setting boundaries and directly challenging false claims are also important strategies. Ultimately, it comes down to trusting your instincts, focusing on the future, and relying on facts over emotions when it comes to combating gaslighting with ADHD. Links & Notes Gaslighting: A Step-by-Step Recovery Guide to Heal from Emotional Abuse and Build Healthy RelationshipsDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Do you remember when you were young and carefree, coasting through school assignments at the last minute? Or social engagements flowing effortlessly from one to the next? As an adult with ADHD, those days may feel like a distant memory. Suddenly, responsibilities pile up, work seems endless, and relationships require much more attention. What changed? In this episode, we explore why ADHD symptoms often worsen from childhood to adulthood. Turns out, the structured school environment and malleable young brain provided a protective cocoon. Youthful resilience and novelty-seeking behaviors also naturally complemented ADHD traits. But adult life removes those scaffolds. We're faced with open-ended choices, little external accountability, and increasingly rigid thinking patterns. Stress compounds the challenges. Without school forcing new learning, our minds stagnate. Mental elasticity gives way to knee-jerk reactions. Dopamine-seeking behaviors like substance abuse or gambling frequently emerge. It's no wonder ADHD feels debilitating. The good news? We can recreate youthful advantages through scheduling routines, mindfulness practices, brain training, and lifestyle changes. Structure liberates the ADHD mind from decision fatigue. Meditation and new hobbies boost dopamine. And cognitive exercises build mental agility. By bringing back elements of childhood, we can recapture some of its ease. The path requires diligence and self-compassion. But reclaiming our younger resilience is within reach. Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We're eager to please, but at what cost? For people with ADHD, saying yes to requests from others often means sabotaging our own priorities. Urgency provides a dopamine hit; the instructions are clear. Best of all, we aren't fully responsible for the outcome. But every time we dodge our obligations to take on extra, we chip away at our future. Before automatically agreeing to favors, pause and examine your motives. Are you truly available or just procrastinating? Will you have to sacrifice critical deadlines to accommodate? Respect your time. Invest in your goals, not just other's. Your needs matter too. Stop self-sabotage disguised as service. Prioritize a future fueled by purpose, not avoidance. We talk about some key principles this week including time shielding for protecting our time from distraction, the values calendar to help align time to our values, and margin for interruption in our schedules. Links & Notes Shawn Blanc writing about MarginDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

When everything is on fire, how do you escape the flames? For people with ADHD, overwhelm can consume our days in a blazing mess of forgotten tasks, ignored priorities, and competing demands. Like a wildfire swallowing the horizon, the urgent eclipses the important until catastrophe looms. Fortunately, firefighters don't panic in the face of infernos. They methodically suppress the flames by targeting fuels one at a time. We can borrow their approach. Tackle the smallest task first for a quick win. Preserve your critical relationships, health, and finances. Let go of time-wasters that won't devastate. Once the blaze subsides, sift through the ashes and rebuild. Learn from the near-disaster to prepare for the next. With level-headed focus, even the most raging overwhelm can be contained. Don't let the flames consume you. Become the firefighter, armed and ready. It’s possible we’re overdoing the fire metaphor. But that’s what we do on the ADHD podcast... we lean in, even when it’s too hot to handle. Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The ADHD Tax is real—and it's costly. A recent poll found over half of people with ADHD lose over $1000 a year to fees, fines, and forgetfulness. We call them ADHD Taxes: late bill payments, expired food, unpaid subscriptions. Benjamin Franklin said nothing is certain except death and taxes, but ADHD Taxes are optional. With planning and habits, we can eliminate these penalties that drain our time, money, and self-esteem. ADHD may be lifelong, but the taxes don't have to be. Learn to stop the cycle and keep that currency—money and time—in your pocket. The cost of a ADHD Tax? Your peace of mind. The gain from ending it? Priceless! Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This week on Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast, Pete and Nikki explore what it means to be uncomfortable and why that's not always a bad thing. The inspiration for this topic came from Melissa reflecting on a step in the GPS process where members review past experiences with strategies and tools from the previous week. She wondered whether it was the tool/strategy that wasn't working or if it just felt uncomfortable because it was new. Melissa asked if we're giving up too quickly on new things by saying they don't work for us when maybe we haven't given them enough time. So, what does it mean to be uncomfortable or outside your comfort zone? Dictionary definitions describe it as feeling unease, awkwardness, distress or lack of confidence. Many ADHDers regularly feel this way, and these are feelings we try to eliminate with new strategies. So why stick with a new system if it brings up the same negative emotions? There’s a bit of a sidetrack around systems with acronyms that can distract from the real effort, all while increasing discomfort, which poses the question: is discomfort important? The bottom line? Don't let initial discomfort lead you to quit on a new strategy too soon. Stick with it, and you might find great benefits once you move past the unease of the unfamiliar. Discomfort doesn't have to last forever. Links & Notes Learning to Learn and the Navigation of Moods: The Meta-Skill for the Acquisition of SkillsDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

In "The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking," you're introduced to the unconventional notion that the pursuit of happiness might actually lie down a 'negative path.' Oliver Burkeman invites you to consider embracing life's uncertainties and insecurities, challenging the prevalent culture of positive thinking. Overly optimistic mindsets, he argues, can lead to a denial of reality and set you up for greater disappointment. The book delves into the idea of "negative capability," encouraging you to become comfortable with ambiguity and resist the urge to hastily resolve doubt. Burkeman guides you through the Stoic philosophy, which emphasizes controlling what you can and accepting what you cannot. He introduces you to the concept of negative visualization, a Stoic practice of contemplating the worst to temper anxiety and build resilience. This conversation also takes you through the paradox of control. Burkeman illustrates how accepting failure can be a conduit to success. He challenges the fixation on goals, advocating instead for a focus on routines, suggesting that happiness is better pursued indirectly as a byproduct of a life lived in alignment with personal values. Lastly, the book beckons you to confront the uncomfortable directly through practices like mindfulness and to appreciate life's fragility through memento mori. Burkeman introduces the concept of antifragility, where you gain strength from stressors. He proposes a balanced life approach, where accepting death, failure, and uncertainty can lead to a more authentic form of happiness. As you reflect on these ideas, you'll find "The Antidote" not just a critique of Western culture's happiness obsession but a practical guide advocating for a more realistic and accepting approach to the inevitable challenges of life. Links & Notes Buy The Antidote: Happiness for People who Can’t Stand Positive ThinkingDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

In his provocative book Four Thousand Weeks, author Oliver Burkeman confronts our culture's obsession with productivity and efficiency. He makes the case that with a limited lifespan of around 4,000 weeks, our pursuit of packed schedules and perfect work-life balance is ultimately futile. Burkeman urges us to embrace the unchangeable reality that our time is finite. Only by accepting our human limitations, he argues, can we focus on what matters most and live with intention. Rather than desperately trying to find more time, we should recognize that time management is impossible. Every moment we gain elsewhere means a sacrifice of something else. Confronting the brevity of life is daunting but also liberating. It allows us to pare down our priorities, say no to less meaningful activities, and zero in on how we truly want to spend the days we have. Presence becomes more important than productivity. With mortality as a guidepost, we can live each moment more purposefully. The book is an enlightening take on time, work, and what makes life meaningful. Burkeman blends philosophical insights with practical advice to fundamentally reframe how we approach our use of time. Four Thousand Weeks is a compelling invitation to examine our values and construct daily routines that align with what we cherish most. Though our weeks are limited, we have the power to fill them with intentionality. Links & Notes Oliver BurkemanBuy Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for MortalsDig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

It's season 28 and we're kicking it off with a look at how we make decisions. See, we all have models through which we see the choices before us. We decided to start this series with a look at some of the acknowledged mental models around decision-making to help us create a vernacular we can use to discuss how our brains are impacted by choices in our lives and our ADHD. Mental models are bite-sized, condensed views that help us understand ourselves and the world around us. We explore various mental models that can both aid and hinder our decision-making, such as the tendency to want to do something, confirmation bias, hindsight bias, overgeneralizing from small samples, social proof, and opportunity costs. We discuss the importance of using these models with caution and not relying on them entirely for decision-making. Join us as we explore these fascinating concepts and gain insights into how our biases and tendencies can influence our choices. Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We’re having so much fun talking about planning that we’re sticking with it another week! And this time, it’s all about what happens when we fall off the wagon. How do you stand up with courage and strength and admit you’ve strayed from your system? How do you face the flood of email when you get back from a well-earned vacation? We’re digging into the tools and practices that will help you get back in the saddle and shake the shame of the struggle along the way! Links & Notes Dig into the podcast Shownotes Database ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★